Funny story - Number 10 To Install Suggestion Box

Number 10 To Install Suggestion Box

In a move that many Britons are hailing as “a major step forward”, British Prime Minister Boris Johnson announced, Monday, that, after 'unanimous agreement by the cabinet', that a suggestion box is to be installed outside the gates of Downing Street…

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Funny story - Lockdown to be enforced on alternate days

Lockdown to be enforced on alternate days

The on-off on-off lockdown put in place by the government due to the Coronavirus is set to be scheduled for yet another change, according to reports coming out of Downing Street this morning. All but 'essential workers' were told to "baton down th…

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Funny story - Is the COVID-19 Vaccine the Mark of the Beast?

Is the COVID-19 Vaccine the Mark of the Beast?

It all started with Kanye West. Kanye West, the famous rapper, recently became what is loosely termed a 'Born-Again' Christian. Many Christians were excited because of his large following. His influence is world-wide. In a recent Tweet to his f…

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Funny story - Extraordinary times call for extraordinary measures - the Man-bun will be culled

Extraordinary times call for extraordinary measures - the Man-bun will be culled

Reports of the Man-bun, once the preserve of post pseudo-hipsters (real hipsters wouldn’t be seen dead with one), migrating to the heads of middle-aged men in lockdown, has resulted in ‘Questions in the House’. As barbers and hairdressers return t…

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Funny story - Painting Shows President Trump And Boris Johnson May Have Been Separated At Birth

Painting Shows President Trump And Boris Johnson May Have Been Separated At Birth

There's no disputing it! Whatever evidence anyone comes up with to the contrary, a recent portrait shows that, without the shadow of a doubt, Donald Trump and Boris Johnson are identical twin brothers who must have been separated at birth! The por…

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Funny story - Boris admits mistakes were made but he’ll do better next time

Boris admits mistakes were made but he’ll do better next time

Earlier today Boris Johnson acknowledged some failings regarding the initial coronavirus press briefings. ‘I do think that, perhaps, with hindsight, I could have taken better expert advice, listened more, and adapted to the situation quicker. On…

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Funny story - July Lockdown More Complicated Than Ever

July Lockdown More Complicated Than Ever

It's finally happened. The expectation that there would be a resurgence of the Covid-19 epidemic has begun, and Prime Minister Boris Johnson has appeared on lunchtime television to announce further confusion for the public. In his well-rehearsed s…

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Funny story - Christmas To Be Delayed Until Next Year

Christmas To Be Delayed Until Next Year

In what's been described as the craziest plan ever hatched, Prime Minister Boris Johnson has announced that, due to the ongoing worries of a Coronavirus 'second wave', and even more embarrassment over his handling of the pandemic, Christmas in the UK...

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Funny story - Boris Johnson tackles the current Covid-19 obesity links

Boris Johnson tackles the current Covid-19 obesity links

Boris Johnson has pointed the country to some alarming statistics regarding the health of the UK. At a Press Conference held at the Lardy Gym in Paisley earlier today, Mr Johnson said, "More than 60% of adults in the UK are overweight or obese ac…

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Funny story - Dominic Cummings Plays Down His Resemblance To Coronation Street's Pat Phelan

Dominic Cummings Plays Down His Resemblance To Coronation Street's Pat Phelan

Dominc Cummings, the hatchet man of Prime Minister Boris Johnson, has tried to play down suggestions that he is actually former Coronation Street character, hatchet man, Pat Phelan. Cummings was in the news recently for breaking his own lockdown r...

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Funny story - Police warn Priti Patel to stop smiling sexily at people

Police warn Priti Patel to stop smiling sexily at people

British Home Secretary Priti Patel received a warning from London’s top cop, about her sexy smile and charming personality. The 37-year-old Indian-origin politician, who is the darling of the right of the Tory party, with her tub-thumping policies on...

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Funny story - Boris Johnson Admits That He Is A Right Cunt

Boris Johnson Admits That He Is A Right Cunt

In an extraordinary impromptu press conference held outside 10 Downing Street just minutes ago, Prime Minister Boris Johnson has said that he doesn't want a snap General Election, Britain will leave the EU on 31 October, and that, without any shadow...

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Funny story - Volunteer For The Vaccine

Volunteer For The Vaccine

Prominent scientists have called for volunteers to be purposely infected with Covid-19 in an attempt to speed up the search for a vaccine. This has caused an outcry from many leading Conservative politicians who have pointed out that their hopeless h…

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Funny story - Box Set Britain’s got Box Set Stress - can ‘The Science’ help?

Box Set Britain’s got Box Set Stress - can ‘The Science’ help?

MP’s concerned about box set bingeing are considering a ‘Box Set Bank Holiday’ so people can catch up. Is ‘Box Set Stress’ a real thing, or is it just an excuse to slob around the house all day? Brenda O’Lox who runs a Box Set Stress support group…

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Funny story - Australia Rejects Trump's Offer of Support

Australia Rejects Trump's Offer of Support

Australia has rejected US President Donald Trump's offer to send help to wombats stricken by the recent bush fires. Following the news of the bush fires, Trump told a press briefing that he had instructed unnamed companies to contact Australia in...

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Funny story - Chester Zoo to re-open

Chester Zoo to re-open

After several high-profile news items depicting various high street retailers sponsoring the animals at Chester Zoo, the zoo has finally been given the go-ahead to re-open on Monday 15th of June. Iceland have sponsored the penguins, Newcastle Unit...

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Funny story - BoJo and Donnie do the obliteration two-step on the deck of the Grace 1 tanker

BoJo and Donnie do the obliteration two-step on the deck of the Grace 1 tanker

In response to Iran's seizure of Britain’s Stena Impero tanker, 19 July, Mr. Johnson and Mr. Trump have taken joint action. Both have been dropped via helicopter onto the deck of Iran’s tanker Grace 1, seized by the British on July 4. This “joi...

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Funny story - Harry Maguire To Participate In General Election

Harry Maguire To Participate In General Election

Harry Maguire, the 26-year-old Manchester United centre-half, who became the costliest defender in the world when he signed for the Old Trafford club from Leicester City, has announced he will stand as an independent candidate against Boris Johnson i...

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Funny story - Coronavirus Social Distancing Distance Reduced To 4' 6"

Coronavirus Social Distancing Distance Reduced To 4' 6"

In a surprise move, this afternoon, Prime Minister Boris Johnson announced in the Commons that the distance of 6 feet that had been the lower limit at which people should practise 'social distancing', is to be partially reduced, to 4 feet 6 inches fr...

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Funny story - Toddler savaged by government watchdog

Toddler savaged by government watchdog

There were calls for changes to The Dangerous Bureaucrats Act last night, after a 3-year-old girl was admitted to Great Ormond Street Hospital suffering from wounds inflicted by a Government Watchdog that had been left free to roam in a London Park.

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