Johnson denies No 10 broke law despite police fines
The Prime Minister today denied that anyone in 10 Downing Street had been fined by the police over COVID rules. He said he was certain that no offences had been committed, despite the police announcing that fines had been issued. During a press confe…
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Ill advised April Fool's Day joke falls flat
In an ill-advised April Fool's Day Joke, Boris Johnson has offered Buckingham Palace to Donald Trump. Posting on his Instagram, Twitter and Facebook pages Mr Johnson said 'We have never really thanked Donald Trump for all of the good that he did d…
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Boris Johnson comes up with 6 point plan to defeat Putin
This morning, Prime Minister Boris Johnson published his 6 point plan to help Ukraine win their fight against Vladimir Putin. The plan will be carried out by Johnson personally: 1. Ask Boris's Russian chums to keep quiet about funding the Tori…
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Britain imposes pathetic "sanctions" on Russia
As Russian tanks roll into Ukraine, fingers are being pointed. But fingers are not guns and NATO is reluctant to send troops to defend. So it has been left to Western countries to try to persuade the Russians to stop the madness by cutting funding to…
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Boris Johnson - the disabled man who doesn't need your handouts
It is perhaps the most unusual election strategy of recent years. Conservative spin-sters are beginning to spread a tale of Boris Johnson as a cripple, a man who suffers from excruciating mythomania, yet who, despite his problems, doesn't try to clai...
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England's Prime Minister Boris Johnson’s Tell-All Book Reveals That He Considers Donald Trump The Most Racist Asshole Since Adolf Hitler
LONDON – (English Satire) – The United Kingdom’s The Bee’s Knees News Agency is reporting that Boris Johnson’s new book titled “Donald Trump Sux The Big One and Dozens And Dozens of Other True Statements About The Orange Complected Whore Mongering Sh…
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Boris Rump's Diplomatic Disaster
President Trump's Speeches To Be Accompanied By Canned Laughter In TV News Reports
Pig not so happy in mud
86 ft sea monster found on Brit beach has same DNA as Boris Johnson!
Queen Demands The Head Of Boris Johnson
Priti Patel backed by Boris Johnson
Brexit Voters To Face Prosecution
Saudi's threaten to hack BOJO's hand off!
Johnson's Facial Hair Bill trimmed by Lords
Boris's loony plans welcomed by sycophantic press
Boris Johnson Admits That He Is A Right Cunt
Popularity Rating Of Boris Johnson Plummets In Wake Of EU Referendum Campaign
Boris Johnson To Debate Donald Trump On Racism – Johnson Is Against Racism and Trump Is For Racism
LONDON – (UK Satire) – After a year in the planning stages, England’s Ta Ta For Now News reports that they will be sponsoring the first of what they hope to be several heated debates on racism, between Prime Minister Boris Johnson and the twice-impea…
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Is he really your Prime Minister? asks the world
Great Britain was today asked if Boris Johnson really was their Prime Minister? Known for his flamboyance, way of being morally corrupt, and his dress sense Boris Johnson is many things, but Prime Minister material may not be one of them. Russi…
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Johnson's outbursts leave bad taste in the mouth of Tory MPs
The Tories are in deep trouble - their leader is suffering a death of a thousand cuts, largely self-inflicted. From Partygate to people realising he's a twat with a deliberately stupid haircut, things are not going well for the Prime Minister. Yet Jo…
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Should I use an illegal lockdown party as an Alibi?
Boris Johnson is asking if he should use yet another illegal lockdown party as an alibi. 'Yes, crikey' wittered Johnson 'I seem to have got myself in a bit of a pickle with both the police and an irate husband. The two issues could be addressed if…
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Police warn Priti Patel to stop smiling sexily at people
British Home Secretary Priti Patel received a warning from London’s top cop, about her sexy smile and charming personality. The 37-year-old Indian-origin politician, who is the darling of the right of the Tory party, with her tub-thumping policies on...
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Boris Johnson is Jimmy Savile's love child
London - Another bottle blonde has proved to be a DNA match for Jimmy Savile's love child. Peroxide bombshell and London Mayor Boris Johnson joins newly discovered 'sister' Georgina Ray, 40, as the deceased entertainer's secret spawn. The newly...
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Harry Maguire To Participate In General Election
Harry Maguire, the 26-year-old Manchester United centre-half, who became the costliest defender in the world when he signed for the Old Trafford club from Leicester City, has announced he will stand as an independent candidate against Boris Johnson i...
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Leave and let die, with Boris and Nigel - Brexit cowards scram
Following Boris Johnson's astonishing refusal to help clear up the mess he'd created in the referendum, his companion-in-arms in their 'leave and let die' campaign to destroy the United Kingdom has now also fled the stage. "I want my life back," w...
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Storm Boris sweeps through Europe, causing damage to European Union offices, European Court of Justice and European fishing fleet that was heading to UK waters
Severe weather warnings across Europe have been issued, after high winds were spotted spiralling across the English Channel towards the continent. A weather watcher on the cliffs of Dover said he was able to make out a giant face in the swirling air,...
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England’s Prime Minister Boris Johnson and America’s Racist Perv Donald Trump Tie For “The Ugliest Hairdo In The World”
CHICAGO – (Satire News) – The 43rd Annual Hair Stylists of America held its yearly hairstyling convention in the Windy City. They had several seminars on the upcoming hair trends for 2022. One interesting trend is that in early 2022, men over 65,…
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Stranger who mistakes Prime Minister Boris Johnson’s advisor Dominic Cummings for homeless man and gives him money to buy coffee is escorted off the premises
Prime Minister Johnson’s advisor Dominic Cummings doesn’t dress like other advisors. He long ago swapped a tie and suit for an anorak and beanie hat. He may be the man that all Tory MPs are afraid of, but few members of the public recognise him among...
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PM plays down No.10 lockdown orgy furore: Staff only fondled using socially distanced hands on springs, says Johnson
Prime Minister, Boris Johnson was at the centre of another #Partygate storm last night as former key advisor, Dominic Cummings, told The Times newspaper that a Roman-style orgy was held at Ten Downing Street during the height of the 2020 lockdown.
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Johnson reveals plans to "level the North"
For years it has been a vague Tory promise to level the North, promoted endlessly by the PM as a hopeful slogan. This week the detailed plans have finally been published in a fifty page report, and Northerners are unlikely to be pleased. It explai…
Read full storyFunny Boris Johnson Headlines
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GMP receive an eight grand CO2 charge for helping in the London Riots
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Britain In Shock As Michael Gove Reveals The True Reason He Ceased To Endorse Boris Johnson For British Prime Minister
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Who will be new Tory leader?
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Britain faces a Christmas election
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Epidemic of panic-buying sweeps Britain
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Coronavirus Social Distancing Distance Reduced To 4' 6"
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London Full Of 'Facking Cants'
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Johnson actually sacks someone
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Boris Johnson's best suit is still at the dry cleaners
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The Party Continues For Defiant Boris Johnson
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Ali G makes comeback as Boris Johnson
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London Riots spread to Dublin
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Toddler savaged by government watchdog
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Cthulhu wins prominent government role after Boris Johnson's cabinet reshuffle
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Boris Johnson flaunts pregnant girlfriend to distract media
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The Clearest Message
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Boris Johnson to encourage children to return to work
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Harry Maguire’s Paper Mache Statue Toppled And Burned By Angry Fans
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Christmas To Be Delayed Until Next Year
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Spousal Rites on the Golan Heights
