CARBIS BAY, England – (Satire News) – In a move that is being hailed as a victory for the entire free world, the G-7 Summit Conference leaders voted unanimously to never again utter the name of Donald J. Trump.
Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau, who probably hates the “Orange One,” more than “Moscow” Mitch McConnell hates being bipartisan, said that DJT once told him in strictest confidence that his heroes growing up were Adolf Hitler, Hirohito, the devil, and the Wild West bank robbing Dalton Brothers Gang.
German Chancellor Angela Merkel added that if the white racist suddenly caught fire, she would not pee on him, although she did add tongue-in-cheek, that she would definitely make a concerted effort to try and turn him off, by spitting on him repeatedly a hell of a bunch.
And French Prime Minister Emmanuel Macron pointed out that he always hated being around the hate-spewing, bitter-tongued Donaldo, as Melania calls him, because his clothes always smelled of Big Macs, Chicken McNuggets, and lies.
Japanese Prime Minister Yoshihide Suga remarked in his native Japanese, “Kamitoshi yanna toyota tushi kawasaki tunga sakison,” which British Prime Minister Boris Johnson said roughly translated means, “Trump one big orange-faced turd head.”
President Joe Biden when asked to comment on DJT simply said, “I just heard from Andy Cohen that ‘Don the Con’ is getting ready to purchase two taco trucks in Brooklyn, in an effort to help pay for his 17 defense attorneys.”
Meanwhile things that were discussed at the G-7 Leaders Summit Conference included, global warming, the Trumpalooza pandemic, quasi-free trade, sanctions on Russia, North Korea, Duck Dung, Alabama, and the sky-rocketing price of avocados.
All of the participants were housed at the local Motel 6, which had just recently been thoroughly renovated at a cost of $19,475.
SIDENOTE: Queen Elizabeth, who is 95-years-old was presented by U.S. First Lady Jill Biden, with the “Lifetime Achievement Award.” The queen said she will cherish the award and plans to hang the silver-plated plaque in Buckingham’s Palace's Piers Morgan Commemorative Bedroom.
