There were 164 spoof news stories published in June 2017. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.
Should Mermaids Make More Money Than Mermen?
"Absolutely not," said one merman. "I mean, mermaids are a dime a dozen, not rare or unique at all, so they just deserve a standard rate, right?" He continued, "Mermen, on the other hand, are unique and rare, and deserve to be paid premium rates."...
Read full storyAlien Cosmetics to produce makeup for purple women
Alien Cosmetics just announced its intentions of producing a line of makeup for purple women called Plum Adorable™. According to Purplicia Greene, spokeswoman for Alien Cosmetics, "Purple women have had to do without proper makeup for years. Some...
Read full story132-Year-Old Lobster Sues, Claims Elder Abuse
Onlookers rejoiced recently when Louie the lobster, having lived the last 30 years of his life in a tank at a Long Island restaurant, was finally set free and returned to the ocean. But Louie is not a totally happy camper and has revealed that he...
Read full storySchmidt & Weissen to produce bidirectional pistol
Schmidt & Weissen, a major gun manufacturer in the US, is developing a bidirectional pistol. Paul Gant of Schmidt & Weissen says, "This is the only gun I'd recommend to scumbags and known gang members." The police have mixed feelings about...
Read full storyBudget airline introduce sexy "lap-dance" sessions to increase revenue!
Budget flights to and from Ibiza, Mallorca and other Brit, booze hotspots, are now offering a special form of activity on board! No more pathetic scratch cards, fast food over-priced snacks, rubbish tasting coffee or duty-free perfumes. No, for th...
Read full storyWoman's Bad Breath Kills Seven on Tourist Train
A Denver woman accidentally killed seven fellow passengers with her bad breath while aboard a popular sightseeing train ride on the border of New Mexico and Colorado. Passengers on the J&O Tours train started screaming and passing out when Thi...
Read full storyPolice, Rescue Respond to Unusual Kidnapping
Denver, CO [PP] -- Police and paramedics responded to what had to be their most unusual kidnapping case. A man who had not opened his refrigerator door in more than two years had the shock of his life. When he finally got around to opening the refrig...
Read full storyNew bicycle ride service beats Uber and Lyft
Phoenix, AZ - According to WedG spokes-person, Streck "The Streak" Baque, WedG's new bicycle ride service is much cheaper that Uber or Lyft. Customers sit on the crossbar. Customers have a choice of facing the pedaler or facing the handlebars. A...
Read full storyPutin denies he is riding on Trumps back to World Domination
Despite secret photographs being leaked to the media of Putin riding Trump in the forests behind his dacha, predictably Putin has categorically denied this and is willing to swear on a stack of bibles that the picture is of another pair out riding. P...
Read full storyBaby bungee jumping latest social media craze!
Michael Jackson's legacy maybe not be quite so innocent as the world believes as parents on social media sites are "aping" his infamous act of dangling baby Paris out of a German hotel window many years ago! Modern parents viewing the video and se...
Read full storyAbbot bans priests from entering Sister Mary's Ass!
After allowing his silent religious order to communicate via the use of Facebook, Abbot Michael Lafferty, was mortified when comments that he left on one of his priest's Facebook entries went viral. Having entered the sanctuary's working donkey in...
Read full storyNew robot invented to help stop certain racially-motivated attacks
Spottedville officials have had enough of a sudden increase in specific racially-motivated crimes. According to Mayor Jenny Smith, "You usually don't hear much about anti-white racism, and it isn't politically correct to mention it. We had to do...
Read full storyCity of Anus fights to change its name
Citizens of the City of Anus are fighting to change their city's name. "We're tired of our town literally being the butt of jokes," says Jennifer Larken, a citizen of Anus. According to Paul Jones of Anus, "I guess we all know where the founder's...
Read full storyQuit Picking On Trump And Trump's Tweets
The nation should just plain quit picking on Trump and his tweets! For heaven's sakes! Grow up! What happened to freedom of the press? Doesn't Trump have a right to an opinion? Just because T was allegedly elected to the highest office in the wor...
Read full storyGreen Haired Girl Sues School District
Amanda Jenkins only wants one thing, and that is to be able to attend school. However, that presents a challenge for her. Jenkins was born with green hair. "Amanda was born with a difference in how her hair follicles use minerals such as titanium...
Read full storyDUI Cops: Tiger Woods Asleep at Wheel of Spaceship
Tiger Woods may be out of the Voyager Tournament as details are emerging in the DUI arrest of the golfing legend: Apparently Woods was passed out and stalled in the fast lane of Intergalactic Highway Q451 West. Intergalactic Highway Police respond...
Read full storyHow much of an asshole is Donald Trump? Let me count the ways.
With apologies to Elizabeth Barrett Browning, although she probably would have thought that Trump was an asshole too, as would her husband Robert, and any children they had, had they had any. How much of an asshole is Donald Trump? Let me count the ways: he is an asshole To the depth and breadth and height that fools Can reach, when they're wallowing in a dump. He is an asshole in every li...
Read full storyPlanet Dracon on the verge of war
(DRAGNOG STAR) - An anti-Cudisim billboard humiliating the religious leader Jeriba Shigan that can be seen from the southbound lanes of speedway 5-46 on the east side is drawing concern from local Cudist. Cuda and Vagina are the two major religion...
Read full storyThe Sulk Institute Announces the New Universal Vaccination Mandate
La Jolla, CA - Lizzy Lackbrain of the Sulk Institute held a major press conference today at noon to announce a new policy that will forever change how mankind protects itself from disease causing organisms. Babys, children and adults will no long...
Read full storyNon-potty trained Brit kids cause crisis in kindergartens!
Modern day mums seem to be losing the basics of bringing up their loved ones because kindergartens all over the country are being confronted with a nappy invasion! Children, even up to the ripe old age of nine have been discovered wearing nappies!...
Read full storyVenezuelan prisoners eat pasta with shit!
It seems the South American country have changed its dietary plans for inmates locked up in their revolting prisons and have introduced a surprisingly interesting menu for their guests; pasta and shit! Venezuela are not the only country where one...
Read full storyFrozen shampoo injures child
Like many young Disney fans, Tiffany Johnson begged her mother to get her the shampoo with Anna and Queen Elsa on the bottle. However, things did not go as expected. First, the mother and daughter had difficulty getting the product out of the bot...
Read full storyTresemme to sue Teresa May
Following her trouncing at the election, Shampoo and hair conditioner manufacturer Tresemme is to sue the never popular, well liked, wheat field runner Teresa May for defamation. 'Our product has always been strong and stable' said a spokesman for...
Read full storyIvanka Trump in Trouble With Vatican For Reproducing Shroud of Turin on Bikini
First Ivanka Trump's fashion company was sued for copying a chastity shoe (left foot only) made by FashionIkon in Transylvania. Now Ivanka Trump Collections™ is in hot water with the Vatican and true believers in the miracle of the shroud of Tu...
Read full storyTrump™ denies he is a Toilet Mouth as MSNBC Whitehouse Brat Spat goes viral
America is as usual enduring its daily dose of embarrassment, this time its turned bloody personal. Everyone knows his tiny hands have been struggling to trying to keep up with Trumps exploding pubescent emotions. The reviled disgust is all too f...
Read full storyObama Suffering Midlife Crisis
Chicago, IL - Former President Barack Obama doesn't know what to do with himself these days. After months of travel and adventure camps, Obama remains without a job or sense of purpose. "Time of my life!" wrote Obama in a recent tweet which was qu...
Read full storyPro Golfer Kills Moose With Calloway's New Epic Driver
Erin Hills, Wisconsin. Chip Fairway, reporting live from the 117th U.S. Open Golf Tournament. After having my PGA Media credentials reinstated, I am happy to be reporting from a live event for the first time in quiet some time. Through some con...
Read full storyIvanka Trump Blasts "Cruel and Vicious" Media Reports of Family Vampirism and Abuse
As she bit the head off of a chinchilla and drank its blood, Ivanka Trump called out the media for what she sees as harsh treatment of her father. "Some of the stories about my family I won't even dignify with a comment--I just can't believe the v...
Read full storyPolice raid BBQ party because kids were playing Cowboys and Indians!
Hertfordshire UK: Police stormed a BBQ party after a nosy neighbour complained about the stench of burning meat; she's a vegan! However, initially the police ignored her call for help because there ain't no law against BBQing dead meat (well not yet...
Read full storySecret Audio Tape Reveals GOP Culture of Reporter Body Slamming
At a GOP auction for bankers and health insurance providers, Paul Ryan was recorded touting the body slamming abilities of certain senators. Apparently the senators and congressmen with the best stats for reporter body slamming auctioned off for the...
Read full storyTwo students suspended over using their initials on a group assignment
Felicia Underwood and Cindy King were suspended from Squaresville High over placing their initials on their joint assignment. Underwood placed F. U. on the paper, followed by King placing C. K. on the paper. According to them, they gave it no thought...
Read full storyNASA forced to reconsider colonizing new planet after aliens report violent attacks
After restarting the NASA program that lay dormant under the Obama Administration, NASA finally discovered a planet that is fit for human habitation. They needed volunteers to inhabit the discovered planet. As a condition for funding the project, NAS…
Read full storyCan the Internet Cause Hip Problems?
Winston-Salem, NC [PP] -- Doctors at Wake Forest Medical Center are perplexed at a sudden increase of problems in patients buttocks. They blame the Internet for the cause, based on the reports of some patients. "I was just laughing away while mess...
Read full storyDead to rights - Busted, disgusted and not to be trusted!
Among other things, I write detective mystery novels and crime thrillers so I watch a lot of true-crime series. Usually, it's a late-night thing for me and this is how I relax and unwind. After watching one or two of the likes of "Wives with Knives",...
Read full storyUS Defense Forces preparing ceremony to pass the Baton of World Leadership to Angela Merkel
After making America great again by abandoning all pretense of world leadership the State Department and the Pentagon are preparing to pass the World Leaders Baton to Germany. In a special ceremony to be held in a specially constructed wall somewh...
Read full storyProminent 80's rappers hold press conference apologizing for early hits
[PP] -- Cool Man, Smooth G, and other prominent rappers of the 80's held a press conference apologizing for their early hits. "I am embarrassed that I took this stage name," said Cool Man. "We thought we were cool back in the day, but we were real...
Read full storyBlack rights group sues God over snow
A local activist group files class action suit against God claiming that snow is racist and doesn't meet affirmative action quotas. They reason that if white folks get white snow, other groups should get snow that is closer to their skin colors. S...
Read full storyComey: Trump's Albino Raccoon Hairpiece Could Be Subpoenaed
BILLINGSGATE POST: Testifying before the Senate Intelligence Committee last week, former FBI Director James Comey swore under oath that he believes President Trump's albino raccoon hairpiece must have been wired during their private meeting last mon...
Read full storyComey flees to Russia meets Snowden at Sheremetyeov Airport
Following President Putin's suggestion that Mr. Comey may wish to seek asylum in Russia, former FBI Director James Comey has fled the country. On the way he was able to tweet a response to Putin: "He's right! I did the same thing as Snowden!" T...
Read full storyUK "Nappy Tax" imposed on parents binning nappies!
UK stinking rubbish bins containing dirty nappies will now face a "Nappy Tax" and the owners of the nappies, not the babies, will have to pay more for binning their disposable diapers (is that word used in the UK?). Young parents are up in arms ab...
Read full storyColonel Sanders Testifies Before House Intel Committee
Potentially pitting the President of the United States against the grandfatherly icon of fast food chicken, Colonel Sanders testified before an oxymoronic House Intelligence Committee while a transfixed world watched on television. In the unfoldin...
Read full storyAntisocial behavior vaccine developed
Some call the new vaccine racist, but scientists are starting human trials of a vaccine designed to stop antisocial behaviors. "The police asked us to come up with something to stop the rampant increase in crime. They asked if it were possible to cre...
Read full storyScientists Work On Brain-Ray to Cure Trump
Science Town, USA Ever since Trump took office, a secret organization, the Scientists for Sanity, have been working on a brain ray for Trump. "We knew right away that there was something seriously wrong with Trump the moment he started campaignin...
Read full storyDook University Develops Prescription Cigarette
Durham, NC [PP] -- On Monday, Dook University released what may be a first for modern science, a therapeutic cigarette which could very well cure some forms of cancer. Dr. Ralph Jones, director of research says, "This is groundbreaking research, t...
Read full storyFlorida car burglars literally caught with their pants down!
Two dimwit car burglars in Florida, wearing mandatory butt pants, attempted to burgle a car standing on a lonely parking area 'butt', the burglary went slightly pear-shape as they attempted to escape the scene of the crime! Caught on police CCTV c...
Read full storyCanadian tornado mows lawn!
A Canadian lawn mower who hates mowing his lawn, but forced outside because his wife cannot stand the grass being longer than 6 inches, decided enough is enough, and God provided him with the perfect solution! He started mowing the lawn and notice...
Read full storyJoe Hart is a belly-flop hero in Scotland!
The Oldest international match on the planet was given extra entertainment value as Joe Hart, England goalkeeper, revealed to the world his next goal (very punny); he is training to participate in the next Olympics and hopes to win a gold in the "Bel...
Read full storyGay Characters Might Exist in the MCU, Says Gunn
Comic Book News- Over the last few years, some adult comic book fans have argued for diversity within the Marvel Macrocosm. Prior to the 2017 announcement that the company would be making "Mysterious Panther" and "El Cap-e-tan Marvel Guy," the stu...
Read full storyDykes On Bikes And Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence Withdraw Support For Nancy Pelosi
BILLINGSGATE POST: The San Francisco Chapter of Dykes on Bikes announced today that they were joining with The Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence in a boycott of Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi. In 1976, a small group of women motorcyclists gathered at th...
Read full storyO.J. Simpson Wants to Return to Playing Football When Released From Prison
Lovelock, NV O.J. Simpson, Heisman Trophy winner and double murderer, said he wants to return to football and add to some of his running back statistics. "I know I've screwed up a lot and so that's why I think it would be good for me to get back t...
Read full storyMove over FitBit - Introducing The ShitFitBit, For Toddlers.
San Jose, CA - Riding the wave of the rise in popularity of fitness trackers, one popular fitness-tracking company is set to release its latest product, The ShitFitBit, which is designed to keep track of all your crazy toddler's shit-fits. "Many f…
Read full storyGirl born with purple skin
[PP] -- Doctors at Regional Hospital are baffled at the birth of an infant girl with purple skin and green hair. Neither of her parents have such features. According to the baby's pediatrician, Dr. Tanya Morgan, the baby seems to be completely hea...
Read full storyTrump: Evidence James Comey Was Double Agent For KGB
BILLINGSGATE POST: Referring to recently released Cold War documents that reveal that former FBI Director James Comey is the son of Julius and Ethel Rosenberg, President Trump believes Comey was covertly working for the Soviet KGB. The Rosenbergs we...
Read full storyRadical process will restore the coal industry to its glory days
Osucit, Japan - Ken Assosuka of the Osucit Power and Light Company held a press conference today to reveal a new process for burning coal that reduces CO2 emissions to zero. The new process captures the CO2 and uses it to carbonate saki, orange juic...
Read full storyRunning through wheat fields to be new Olympic Sport
Following her humiliating defeat at the hands of the British electorate, British Prime Minster Teresa May is looking for a new pastime, to while away the worries of missing important discussions, not turning up for meetings, not having a decent polic...
Read full storySpellbound Females
Aug. 23rd, 1973 two machine-gun carrying criminals entered a bank in Stockholm, Sweden. They held 4 hostages, 3 women and one man; strapped them with dynamite, for 131 hours, until they were finally rescued on Aug. 28th. Strangely enough, during the hostage taking, it was observed that hostages had formed a favorable baffling attitude towards their captors, rather than the rescue team! Psychologis...
Read full storyTrump Punks World: It's All Just a Reality TV Show Folks
Completely unknown to the Western world and even our so called "intelligence agencies", it seems the Trump presidency has been a hit reality TV show in Russia and North Korea for an entire year. Trump Fools World is the popular new show produced b...
Read full storyBizarre Bjork Songs Secretly Confess To Tour Killing Spree
Reykjavk, Iceland - Authorities at the very small and very cold police station in the Icelandic Capitol are hesitant to drive their ice-mobiles up to the ice castle on the mountain ledge overlooking town, to arrest the queen of the village, avant-gar...
Read full storySatire Writers and Mainstream Journalism encroachment confusion - They are both writing the same absurd stories
With the rise of Trumpism causing many new and escalating old conflicts using the latest in political armaments from TrumpScam.com™, language and public sanity have become one of the main causalities. A recent study commissioned by the Ameri...
Read full storyTrump's Climate Accord Withdrawal Actually Just Evidence of Alternative Realities
The presidential address of the Withdrawal of the United States from the Paris Climate Accord has generated a world-wide investigation into the reality Trump originates from, and its implications on the multiverse. Despite evidence from the scien...
Read full storyThe Imp condemn Tambo Rooka
Space News- A 20-year-old Imp from the planet Kangaroo has been sentenced to twenty years hard labor by a court, following the conviction on charges he insulted the prophet Hooter and his wives on Social-Media, officials said Tuesday. Hazmat is th...
Read full storyTrump Pulls Out (Like His Dad Should Have)
Donald Trump has pulled the US out of the "Paris Accord" which is a climate saving deal designed to try and keep the planet alive for a few extra weeks. The deal is ratified by 195 different countries and seems to be the only thing the world can agre...
Read full storyPope considering nuking Australia over Cardinal Pells phedophilia charges
In a highly secret meeting, the Pope was said to be outraged at the latest pedophile scandal to hit the church, demanding to know why Pell didn't mop this up before he left Australia. It seems time and his track record of deceit and outrage agains...
Read full storyWhy are people obsessed with objects?
The medical classification for people who become attracted to inanimate objects is "objectophilia" or "object-craving." It's considered an embodiment of affection after clinical sociologists Dr. Amy Marsh discovered it's origin to be related to l...
Read full storyMan's Right Hand Has 2.5 Million Followers on Twitter
Uzia Remsen had dangerous Gibsonopathy* surgery to separate the hemispheres of his brain in an attempt to cure the hundreds of seizures a day that plagued him. Though Remsen no longer suffers from seizures, his right hand has literally taken on a...
Read full storySatan Scores a Win at the Supreme Court
In a big win for the church of Satan, the Supreme Court ruled on Monday in favor of Trinity Lutheran Church v. Comer, the Church's case against the state of Missouri. The case involved discrimination by the state in giving out publicly funded grants.
Read full storyAustralian police dog sacked because he was too soft!
The world of canines wanting to become police dogs in Australia is tough as the case of Gavel, a Queensland German Shepard proves; he got the boot for being too soft! Gavel went through all the training required, but during certain exercises, he w...
Read full storyNon wankers website is proving very handy for Tossers!
A website especially designed for men, not women, to avoid masturbating, is gathering in popularity as it offers males inclined to enter the world of 'tossers' a hands-on method of reducing the temptation! It's called, NOFAP, which nobody on the p...
Read full storyNo Nudes Is Bad News!
Like nudism itself, nudist colony memberships are in decline around the world. "Not many people want to parade around in front of strangers--or behind them, for that matter," Grumpy Baer whined. Reporters who get laid, uh, paid for publicizing nud...
Read full storyNew vaccine mandate meeting increasing opposition
Central Park- New York,NY - Dog walkers in Central Park are voicing protests to the AMA over the new vaccine pogrom reported on here. Ms. Penny Triever contacted our newspaper to complain about the pogrom which requires citizens to lick the bottom...
Read full storyPutin Confesses to US 2016 Election Meddling? Of Course!
Earlier today from the Kremlin, Vladimir Putin announced that: Yes, he rigged the voting machines in Pennsylvania, Michigan and Wisconsin during the last US presidential election, and did so just to embarrass that NATO-loving, EU supporting, capitali...
Read full storyTwitter promotes new Product - Twitter Twatter Weaponised Hysteria™
Twitter today proudly announced a new product today that they believe will give them the edge on Zuckerburgs Face Space Fake News capability. Twitter management have been concerned recently with falling revenues and saw the success of the other guys...
Read full storyTrump Cites Comey's "Big Hands" As Reason for Firing Former FBI DIrector
Congressional investigators announced the discovering of a highly classified memo written by President Trump that explains the 10 reasons why he decided to fire the former FBI Director, James Comey. President Trump listed the 10 reasons in the s...
Read full storyNicaragua and Syria Announce Their Decision to Join the Paris Climate Agreement
Managua, Nicaragua - On Friday, the day after Trump announced that he was joining Nicaragua, Syria and Pittsburgh in abandoning the Paris Climate Agreement, Nicaraguan strongman and Presidente Daniel Ortega announced he would join the list of nations...
Read full storyFEMEN damages natural landmark
Norwegians are collecting money to repair the famous penis shaped rock formation damaged by FEMEN protesters who complained the natural formation promotes sex tourism, sexism, and pregnant women. The popular tourist attraction is located in southe...
Read full storyDeep Esophagus Reveals the Source of the White House Leaks
AT A PARKING GARAGE SOMEWHERE IN WASHINGTON--In a meeting between David Corn of Mother Jones and a shadowy figure who only identifies herself as "Deep Esophagus," the source of the many leaks that have plagued the Trump Administration are coming to l...
Read full storyRooney In United Stand-off
International marketing firm and social media gurus, Manchester United, have dropped their biggest hint yet that England Captain Wayne Rooney will be leaving the club. United's record goal scored has spent time on the substitutes bench this season an...
Read full storyThe British people are tired of political games
LONDON- Conservatives lose majority in British Parliament, and the public says enough is enough with political games. The outcome - a positive turn for the general public as groups of Brit's join a new political organization, "New Britannia Progre...
Read full storyTrump Takes Ball and Goes Home at the NATO Conference
Geneva, Switzerland President Donald Trump of the United States attended a NATO Conference and, in his daughter Ivanka's opinion, looked very presidential. Trump was criticized for pushing fellow attendees out of the way to be in front, but Ivan...
Read full storyUnemployment Increases by 3.5 Million and What to do?
This week, President Trump needs to deal with bigger issues than backing out of the Paris Climate Agreement. In early June, over 3.5 million Americans became unemployed. Sources say the government and the media are keeping this issue quiet because it...
Read full storyBritish mum kicked out of garden centre for only wearing banana leaves!
After all it was only 24 degrees celsius but, feeling quite hot and sticky, a mum from Hampshire, UK, (not the posh one in the USA) decided to go shopping in a local garden centre dressed only in banana leaves! The leaves covered her intimate part...
Read full storyShooting used toothpicks with toothpick crossbows banned in China!
The Chinese, renowned for their skills at swamping the world's markets with useless, garbage toys, have now "boomeranged" as their own children have been purchasing the latest craze; toothpick crossbows; WTF! Millions of Chinese kids are aiming th...
Read full storyGermany abolishes marriage
GERMANY- After heavy thinking and discussions, lasting the whole week, the German parliament (Bundestag) agreed upon a law on Friday that will eliminate all marriage laws in Germany, ending the governments subjugation over it's citizens. The law,...
Read full storyAn Unassuming Proposition: Teach Gangs to Shoot Straight
The near-fatal shooting of a small child in Compton last week, hit by a stray bullet intended for someone else, was only the most recent in a long list of similar unintentional shootings of innocent victims. This nation has had more than enough fune...
Read full storyDonald Trump Has Already Broken Numerous Presidential Records
"In analyzing President Trump's term in comparison with other U.S. Presidents, we have found a number of executive office records that Trump has now broken," spoke a history analyst at Northwestern University. The list includes: 1. Most lies ever by a POTUS, beating Ronald Reagan's eight-year total in just eight months. 2. Lamest inauguration ever, with lower attendance than Presi...
Read full storyRussian wolves and bears fight over who owns lost 4 year-old "Mowgli" in Ural forest!
Rudyard Kipling could not have written it better! A 4 year-old boy lost in the vast Russian Ural woods has been found alive by search parties scouring the area where he mysteriously wandered off whilst his dad was searching for firewood! After day...
Read full storyMale impersonator calls it quits
After 3 years, Male impersonator Jane Barley is hanging up her sky diving jumpsuit. Most of her loyal fans have found their way into the obituary. "Nowadays, drugged out teens are into "Jimmy Pop," a teen singer from the music group New Kids on t...
Read full storyQueen considers Schaller for Knigthood - Prince William declares he's not 15 Hands
Scott Schaller, Graphics Design Teacher from Cabrillo HS in Lompoc CA, has been on the "short list" of possible nominees for knighthood in 2017. The honor of Knighthood bestowed on an individual by the Queen brings along the title of Sir. Queen Eliza...
Read full storyBritish men marry foreign brides
A controversial entrepreneur has created a fantastic marriage agency to help British men find Eastern European wives with close to 45,000 Britons signing up. Aleister Crowley, 33, is the brains behind FamilyValues.web and aims at improving the gen...
Read full storyFabulous STAR UK tabloid gives their brain-damaged footy readers the latest on the Ronaldo saga!
Now there is no need to tell anybody with an ounce of sense between their ears that Brit Tabloids are full of utter CRAP! However, one particular RAG has taken taking the piss out of it's highly intellectual, intelligent readership, to a new level...
Read full storyHeatwave creates innovative methods in how to get some kip!
The heatwave affecting most of Europe has caused many people to create methods of getting some sleep. In fact, such situations sometimes bring out the very best in people (and sadly sometimes the worst!). Here are Jaggedone's methods for UK suffer...
Read full storyGovernor Christie awakes 200 pounds lighter!
Historically obese New Jersey governor Chris Christie awoke hungover and significantly lighter! The now surprisingly normal sized Christie came to in an Atlantic City hotel and was astounded to find himself having lost 200 pounds or roughly 350 Big M...
Read full storyPolice baffled at the occurrence of spots all over town
Squaresville police are trying to figure out the meaning of what looks like a new form of vandalism throughout their town. Nearly everything is getting covered with spots. This was first discovered when police officers started getting calls about the...
Read full storyGideon Strikes Back!
George Osborne has called Teresa may "a dead woman walking" after her election cock up. Unsurprisingly coming from the mouth of a man who we believe has been dead for some time and merely jumps his consciousness into recently deceased bodies. Look in...
Read full storyTrump: "He's a leaker and a freaker and a bathroom peeker!"
In a tweet last night and again this morning in a written statement President Donald Trump called former FBI director James Comey... "a leaker and a freaker and a bathroom peeker!" Trump went on to say in his written statement that it was a mat...
Read full storySICKmatch.com Eases Stigma of Dating With Rare Diseases
Gioni Malocutia suffers from Tourette's syndrome, an illness often skewered by comedians, but one that makes it difficult if not impossible to find a mate or even an occasional date in real life. After having zero success on traditional dating sit...
Read full storyMan Maimed and Blinded For Online Bullying
Spotian County -- Doug Smith won't have to worry anymore about harassing anyone online as someone permanently cured him of that character flaw. According to the police, Smith regularly harassed and bullied people online. He accused them of being othe...
Read full storyTrumpNoCare.com™ to give 22 Million Americans health care
Sitting astride Toilet Mouth Conway Trump has pronounced that under his magnificent leadership all Americans will now get Health Coverage. The nasty failing ObamaCare will be replaced by our magnificent TrumpNoCare.com™. Huckabee from the p...
Read full storyKathy Griffin Waterboarded by Secret Service
Some Unknown, Very Dark Location Kathy Griffin, who had a video shot of her holding the severed head of Donald Trump, has been located, somewhat. The "Secret Service," who guard the President, have confirmed that she has been taken to a secret locat...
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