Budget airline introduce sexy "lap-dance" sessions to increase revenue!

Funny story written by Jaggedone

Wednesday, 14 June 2017

image for Budget airline introduce sexy "lap-dance" sessions to increase revenue!
The perfect butt for lapdancing on budget airline booze flights to Ibiza!

Budget flights to and from Ibiza, Mallorca and other Brit, booze hotspots, are now offering a special form of activity on board! No more pathetic scratch cards, fast food over-priced snacks, rubbish tasting coffee or duty-free perfumes.

No, for the summer season a particular Budget Airline will offer cheap booze if female passengers, slightly tipsy, are willing to jump on boozed up Brit males laps and gyrate sexily in a high altitude, duty free, lap-dance slap up. Because the seats are so tight with no leg room, the performance is particularly hot and sticky.

Younger and middle-aged females can participate, only older men with bad knees are advised not to join in the fun. Geriatric females have also been told that the health risk too high at altitude and they look quite distasteful straddled over boozed up horny young Brits. The airline is offering cheap six-packs of beer for males willing to perform and the ladies will be offered high-octane cocktails during flights.

Stewardesses will hand out invitation cards before boarding begins instead of checking 10 kilo hand baggage. Sexy looking females willing to lapdance and attempting to smuggle more than 10 kilos of make-up on board will have their baggage taken into the hold for free as long as they promise to perform for the other passengers. This latest attempt to extract as much money as possible out of passengers pockets is certainly more popular than the other methods mentioned and sales of booze on board are rocketing.

A gay version of on board lap-dance entertainment was rejected and this has led to a bottleneck in recruiting new stewards because they feel discriminated against! Watching hot, drunken females gyrating on males thighs between tight airline seats is quite repulsive many believe!

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more