After making America great again by abandoning all pretense of world leadership the State Department and the Pentagon are preparing to pass the World Leaders Baton to Germany.
In a special ceremony to be held in a specially constructed wall somewhere in the desert, Chief of the Defence Forces will pass the baton in an elaborate ceremony where Germany will take possession of the World Leaders Baton. Organisers assured participants there would be strong security to stop anyone with long ties from barging in where they weren't welcomed.
The president joked about "how we bombed the crap out of them in the war and we will do it again if you piss me off, but this time we will nuke you". He further continued, "i have registered the branding rights so every missile is a Trump branded missile now, so every time i press the button i will get a royalty".
When Merkel was asked about this threat by the US she replied using the old parable of the boy that cried wolf, "eventually everyone stops taking them seriously and just ignores them". She further promised that they wouldn't give the baton to the Nazis as they were a bit irresponsible, but we also noted that the US had far more Neo-Nazis than we do.
Stocks in Trump Missiles™ were immediately trading higher after the announcement.
Alt-Right groups demanded that while he was shooting off some fireworks that Russia and China should go to. They say that will make America great again (well for at least 27 minutes anyway)
