The Golden State Warriors with a Dismal 15-50 Record Are Thrilled That The NBA Season Was Suspended
OAKLAND – One NBA team that is not shedding tears over the season being cut short are the Golden State Warriors. Coach Steve Kerr’s team had the worst record of the entire 30 NBA teams. In fact, Warriors fans were already wearing medical masks, fa...Read full story
The Sound of Dribbling Basketballs Has Faded Off Into The Sunset
MIAMI – The NBA owners met at LeBron James’ Miami mansion, Casa Dribble, and they voted to suspend the remainder of the NBA season due to the Coronavirus which is getting out of hand. The vote to stop playing was 29-1. The owners are still trying...Read full story
Lakers Trade Magic Johnson to Cleveland
Almost lost in the flurry of last-minute trades before the NBA deadline, was a strange arrangement between two struggling teams who once were at the top of their respective divisions. In a surreptitious exchange, the Los Angeles Lakers sent their...Read full story
Dion Waiters Latest NBA Player to OD on Gummy Bears
Miami Heat guard, Dion Waiters, is the latest NBA player to run afoul of THC-infused gummy bears. On his team's flight from Phoenix to Los Angeles on Thursday. Waiters, 27, suffered a raging panic attack after he had "overdosed" on THC-infused gummy...Read full story
Shaq to be Lakers New Head Coach?
Staples Center, Los Angeles. With the Los Angeles Lakers in turmoil after Magic Johnson's surprise resignation as head of basketball operations, and Luke Walton's dismissal as head coach, talks have begun with Shaq O'Neal in an attempt to lure him aw...Read full story
It's A Bird! It's A Plane! It's A Bat, man!
During a recent basketball game between the Indiana Pacers and the Los Angeles Clippers at the Banker Life Fieldhouse Arena, a confused bat was a surprising guest star. Seen by the crowd of thousands, it swooped down and flew in erratic circles, nea...Read full story
NCAA Protests LaVar Ball's Proposed Basketball League
The NCAA today lodge a formal protest against an effort by LaVar Ball to create a new professional basketball league for high school graduates who have no interest in attending college. The plan, as outlined by Ball to SPOOF, would offer outstanding...Read full story
Kim Kardashian's NBA Boyfriend Kris Humphries Slam Dunks Her With A Marriage Proposal And She Says "Yes! Yes! Oh Hell Yes!"
HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries have been described by Ellen DeGeneres as one of the happiest celebrity couples since Brad Pitt and Jennifer Aniston first got together. Kim, who is one-third of the infamous Kardashian sisters, and whose most distinctive feature is her humongous ass, has been in a relationship with Kris Humphries, who is a power forward with the New Jersey Ne...Read full story
Eva Longoria-Parker Files For Divorce From San Antonio Spurs Point Guard Tony "WienieBoy" Parker
SAN ANTONIO - Eva Longoria-Parker, who portrays Gabrielle Solis on the ABC hit show Desperate Housewives, has just become a desperate housewife. The 35-year-old Longoria-Parker, who will probably be dropping the Parker part of her name faster than...Read full story
Basketball: NBA London Game Was Close Until The Very Last Few Fractions Of A Second
The NBA London Game between the New York Knicks and the Washington Wizards was as exciting as basketball gets, and the result was always in doubt until the last few fractions of the final second. As everyone knows, basketball is a game where it ca...Read full story
Tony Carr and Shep Garner are Nittany Lions gone nuclear!
Tony Carr scored 21 points, Shep Garner added 18 while breaking a school record for career 3-pointers and Penn State routed Mississippi State 75-60 in the National Invitational Tournament semifinals Tuesday night. The fourth-seeded Nittany Lions (...Read full story
LuAnne Bawl, 6, Rescinds Commitment to Play Basketball for UCLA
Chico Mills, CA. LuAnne, the youngest member of the infamous Bawl basketball family, has rescinded her letter of commitment to enter UCLA in 2028 and play on the Bruins' women's basketball team. Her father, LaBore Bawl, announced the rescission ear...Read full story
"Sudden Death Nursing Home" Opens in Tampa
Tampa, Fl - "Sudden Death Nursing Home" opened today and is admitting new residents. The owner is very excited to promote the first known sports-themed nursing home. Owner Mort Fast tweeted, "We love our new name, not Sunset or October. For...Read full story
Virginia's National Basketball Championship Victory Boosts D.C. Man's Self-Esteem
Jeff Sexton of Washington, D.C., had struggled with low self-esteem and depression until his alma mater, the University of Virginia, pulled out a thrilling overtime victory against Texas Tech in the 2019 NCAA Tournament championship basketball game.Read full story
Celtics Lose When Kyrie Irving Tries to Kick the Ball into the Hoop
The Boston Celtics lost to the Philadelphia 76ers Wednesday after Kyrie Irving missed a last second shot that he tried to drop kick into the hoop. “For the last shot, I called a play to get the ball to Kyrie, who would then drop kick the ball into...Read full story
The President Names Porn Star Stormy Daniels Secretary of Sex
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Louisiana-born porn star Stormy Daniels has just been named by President Barack Obama to head up the newly-established Department of Sex. Miss Daniels, 30, will be the nation's first Secretary of Sex. In her role she will be res...Read full story
Miami Heat Sign Bela Karolyi To Carry LeBron Up And Down Court If Cramps Persist
CARRY ON MY WAYWARD SON, SOUTH BEACH --The Miami Heat have hired legendary gymnastics coach Bela Karolyi to carry their star LeBron James up and down the court in case his cramping persists in the NBA finals against the San Antonio Spurs. "You can...Read full story
LeBron James Said Acting Like Kobe Bryant Fired Up His Miami Heat Teammates
MIAMI - The Miami Heat defeated the San Antonio Spurs 103-100 in overtime in game six to tie things up at three victories each pushing the NBA finals to a game seven. After the game James was asked by Sports Balls Illustrated Daily's Rufus Reno wh...Read full story
Barack Obama's White House Basketball Court: 'The First Mama Arena'
WASHINGTON, D.C. - President-elect Barack Obama was asked by ABC's Charlie Gibson what immediate changes he plans on making to his new future home, The White House. Obama smiled and said "Well first of all, I will be having the presidential bowlin...Read full story
LeBron James and Dwyane Wade Finally Apologize To Dirk Nowitzki For Making Fun of Him When He Had A 102 Fever
MIAMI - Well it took them long enough but the losers of the NBA finals LeBron "Prince" James and Dwyane "The Court Jester" Wade have finally apologized to the 2010-2011 NBA Champion MVP Dirk "Mr. Class Act" Nowitzki. LeBron, who has since been tra...Read full story