Marvel’s New Captain America is Black
HOLLYWOOD – (Movie Satire) - The latest actor to portray the Marvel superhero Captain America is Anthony “The Bro” Mackie, who just happens to be black. He recently spoke with Howard Stern, and expressed how thrilled he was at the fact that he had…
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The Utah Jazz and The New Orleans Pelicans Finally Kick The NBA Season Off With Every Single Player and Coach Kneeling
ORLANDO, Florida - (Sports Satire) – After months of speculation, concern, worry, and downright confusion due to the Coronavirus, the NBA balls are now bouncing at the Orlando Bubble. NBA Commissioner Adam "Hi Yo" Silver remarked that it is good t…
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Los Angeles Lakers Unveil Their New Star, Reuben Reubenstein, 9
The Los Angeles area was buzzing with great interest this evening, as the Lakers unveiled their unbelievably-talented new signing, the 9-year-old child prodigy, Reuben Reubenstein, who has joined the team and given up going to school, because he does…
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Los Angeles Clippers Guard Lou Williams is Now The Most Hated Player in the Entire NBA
ORLANDO, Florida - (Sports Satire) - L.A. Clippers guard Lou Williams was excused to go outside the bubble, to pick up ten boxes of fully-loaded pizzas for the team. But, on the way to the restaurant, he decided to stop off at one of Orlando’s mo…
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The NBA Says That The Disney World Basketball Bubble is Looking as Fine as Walla Walla Wine
ORLANDO - The NBA Disney World Bubble is proudly boasting that there is no sign of the Coronavirus within 9 miles of the venue. NBA executives are expressing that the round ball operation is running as smooth as fine Walla Walla Wine Every one…
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Dennis Rodman to Visit Kim Jong-un in the Hospital
LOS ANGELES – One of the NBA’s greatest rebounders has informed the news media that he will be traveling to Pyongyang, North Korea, to visit his BFF, Supreme Leader, Kim Jong-un, in the hospital. Rodman, who has more tattoos, piercings, and gold j...
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Tony Parker Leads The San Antonio Spurs To The NBA Western Conference Championship As They Sweep The Memphis Grizzlies 4 Games to 0
NBA Announces: The Russians are Coming! As Putin Protege Moves to Buy NY NETS and Gains Rights to Shooting Guard Gilbert Arenas!
ACLU to NCAA: 'Let's call it March Irrationality.'
Dana Altman Quits As Arkansas Razorbacks Basketball Coach After One Day
Russia's Richest Man Buys The New Jersey Nets
LeBron James and Dwyane Wade Finally Apologize To Dirk Nowitzki For Making Fun of Him When He Had A 102 Fever
After Success of Beach Volleyball, WNBA Adopts White Bikinis
Dennis Rodman Apologizes To Kim Jong Un For His USA Team Blowing Out The North Korean All-Star Team
Los Angeles Lakers Player Luke Walton Appears To Be Heading To The Washington Wizards
Magic Johnson Lambasts The Lakers Using The "E" Word
Celtics Lose When Kyrie Irving Tries to Kick the Ball into the Hoop
The Lakers May Fire Mike D'Antoni and Hire Phil Jackson

Harlem Globetrotters In Row With The Spoof Over Logo
The Harlem Globetrotters, the famous globetrotting basketball superstars from Harlem, who wowed fans in the 1970s with their crazy-but-skilful on-court antics, are considering taking legal action against the owner of a satirical news website over the...
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The NBA Now Says That The Balls May Not Be Bouncing Like They Had Planned
NEW YORK CITY – The commissioner of the NBA has just put out some bad news for pro basketball hungry fans. Adam Silver told Sports Balls Illustrated that because of the Coronavirus numbers on the rise, the NBA season may be scrapped. One die-ha…
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Dion Waiters Latest NBA Player to OD on Gummy Bears
Miami Heat guard, Dion Waiters, is the latest NBA player to run afoul of THC-infused gummy bears. On his team's flight from Phoenix to Los Angeles on Thursday. Waiters, 27, suffered a raging panic attack after he had "overdosed" on THC-infused gummy...
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LeBron James of The Los Angeles Lakers Has Said That He Supports the Black Lives Matter Movement 101%
CLEVELAND – The top basketball player in the NBA was back in his hometown, visiting a cousin, Toby "Mr. Meat" Stuyvesant, who just opened up a barbecue restaurant named the Sweet Sultry Smoke Shack. LeBron smiled, as he said that the eatery's slog...
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San Antonio Spurs Tim Duncan and Manu Ginobili Warn Tony Parker That If He Comes Near Their Wives They'll Kick Him Back To France
SAN ANTONIO - Tony Parker is by no means the first athlete to cheat on his wife. NBA players like English football (soccer) players are sad to say notorious for their marital transgressions. But in the case of the one who calls himself "Frenchy" h...
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The NBA Has Just Picked Up a Very Appropriate Sponsor
DETROIT – The NBA has just informed the sports media that it has just picked up a brand new sponsor for the 2020 season. NBA Commissioner Adam Silver, said that the NBA is excited to welcome its newest corporate sponsor, Black Lives Matter. Si…
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NBA Coach Gregg Popovich Says That Trump Dribbles a Basketball Like a Sissy
SAN ANTONIO – Famed NBA basketball coach Gregg Popovich was having some practice drills with two of his star players, Patty Mills (#8) and Marco Belinelli (#18). The players had come to his Star Wars-style mansion and were enjoying getting a littl...
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The Golden State Warriors with a Dismal 15-50 Record Are Thrilled That The NBA Season Was Suspended
OAKLAND – One NBA team that is not shedding tears over the season being cut short are the Golden State Warriors. Coach Steve Kerr’s team had the worst record of the entire 30 NBA teams. In fact, Warriors fans were already wearing medical masks, fa...
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Dallas Mavericks Will Kick off the NBA Season Against The Houston Rockets on July 31
HOUSTON – The city of Houston is thrilled that their Rockets will finally be getting off the launch pad at NASA, and hitting the basketball court. Coach Mike D’Antoni said that he is sick and tired of watching reruns of the “Price is Right” and “…
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The NBA Teams Will Start Dribbling on July 30
NEW YORK CITY – The NBA season will finally be starting after a 4-month hiatus, that’s 2 years and 4 months in dog years. The Utah Jazz are scheduled to kick off the season against the New Orleans Pelicans. Utah coach Quin Snyder told Sports Be...
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LeBron James Hints That He May Be Playing Basketball In Norway
LOS ANGELES – One of the greatest basketball players to ever dribble a basketball, LeBron James, has informed Sports Balls Illustrated Magazine that he may be leaving the country. James, who plays for the Los Angeles Lakers, said that the NBA seas...
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The Sound of Dribbling Basketballs Has Faded Off Into The Sunset
MIAMI – The NBA owners met at LeBron James’ Miami mansion, Casa Dribble, and they voted to suspend the remainder of the NBA season due to the Coronavirus which is getting out of hand. The vote to stop playing was 29-1. The owners are still trying...
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San Antonio Spurs Coach Gregg Popovich is Reportedly Asking Tim Duncan, Tony Parker, and Manu Ginobili to Please Come Out of Retirement and Play For the Spurs
SAN ANTONIO – Ever since the “Big 3” left the Spurs, the team has not been doing as well as they had been in the past. After retiring, Duncan went back home to the Virgin Islands, Ginobili left for Argentina, and Parker returned to France. Lit…
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Yao Ming named Wyoming's Person of the Year
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The State of Ohio Has Purchased Brand New Trucks For Each Dallas Mavericks Player
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The Dallas Mavericks Gets Swept Out Of The Playoffs By The Oklahoma City Thunder - Mavs Owner Mark Cuban Blames It On The "Kardashian Curse"
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Kobe Bryant's Laker Teammates Are Fed Up With His Diva Antics
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Lakers Imploding: Coach D'Antoni Benches Pau Gasol
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Khloe Kardashian Is Trying To Get Over Her Depression
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Former Boston Celtics Player Comes Out of The Sports Closet and Admits He's Gay
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LeBron James of The Miami Heat Responds To The Gay Rumors
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The World Champion Miami Heat Get Beaten By The Washington Wizards And Thus Let The #1 Seed Get Away
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NCAA Protests LaVar Ball's Proposed Basketball League
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Obama's Half-Brother Drafted By The Boston Celtics
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Obama Builds Basketball Court In White House
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The Cleveland Cavaliers May Soon Become The Cancun Cavaliers
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Kobe "Vino" Bryant Explains How He Finally Managed To Get The Lakers Fired Up
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Kobe Bryant Says That It Looks Like The Curse of Shaquille Has Finally Caught Up With Him and The Lakers
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Mark Cuban Buys Hugh Hefner's Viagra Pill Factory
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NBA Player Retires After Half Time Defeat To Teenager
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Recent national study discovers surprising views on Bernie Sanders
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Tony Carr and Shep Garner are Nittany Lions gone nuclear!
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NBA Player Jerseys To Have Social Justice Statements in Place of The Players Names