Middle schoolers bind and whip principal following classroom visit by dominatrix

Funny story written by Dr. Billingsgate

Thursday, 29 June 2023

Hey!

The funny story you are trying to access may cause offense, may be in poor taste, or may contain subject matter of a graphic nature. This story was written as a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

If you wish to back out now, please click here to go back to the home page.

image for Middle schoolers bind and whip principal following classroom visit by dominatrix
Whip Woman

Leona Abernathy, principal of Belfry Middle School in Beaver Crossing, Nebraska, was determined to allow her students the opportunity to experience Nature without boundaries. Most of the students were farm kids, and had observed farm animals doing their thing, so nothing should surprise them.

Being somewhat progressive herself - she wore a combat boot on one foot and a high-heel loafer on the other - she invited a group of gender benders to perform a drag show for the students.

The girls giggled and the boys he-hawed.

“Beats study hall,” said Homer Smuckmeister, the grandson of Elmer Smuckmeister, the head of the local Board of Education.

Elmer, an honorable man, was bound and determined to remain celibate for one month after his favorite sheep went to market. Being non-binary himself, he saw no harm when Miss Abernathy invited a Dominatrix to demonstrate her methods to the kids.

It all turned around one week later when a group of students bound up Ms. Abernathy and took turns whipping her into submission when she wouldn’t allow them to wear their MAGA hats to school. Some of the locals thought that this experiment had gone far enough and demanded Elmer resign from his post.

Dr. Slim: “Spare the rod and spoil the child.”

Dirty: “Yo, Dr. Dude. If this can happen in Beaver Crossing, your town might be next.”

BILLINGSGATE POST

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot