Man Bums A Fag
There was controversy in central London earlier this week when an overly-friendly American tourist approached a gentleman stood minding his own business in a shop doorway, and asked him if he could have homosexual relations with another man. John...
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Tinder Adds New “COVID-19 Positive” Option For Users
SAN FRANCISCO - In a bid to stay relevant during the recent global pandemic, the popular dating app, Tinder, has added a new option for those testing positive for COVID-19. “At Tinder, we have a simple mission – that everyone deserves the opportun...
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Music Fan Was Unfamiliar With Cardi B
Cardi B, the rapper, might be a household name in some households in the US, but one avid music fan in the UK claimed, this morning, that he'd never even heard of her. The singer, real name Belcalis Marlenis Almánzar, was the first female, black r...
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President Trump Has Orgy With Demi Lovato, Nicki Minaj, Kellyanne Conway And Meghan Markle
WASHINGTON, DC - White House officials are, this morning, denying rumours of a spectacular orgy in which Trump participated. That's President Donald Trump, you understand. Some writers don't explain that; they just say 'Trump', inferring some k...
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Where are they now? Brentford Nylons
Those were the days or rather the nights. The nights when you and your blonde teenage girlfriend would indulge in carnal pleasures, all snug and warm in her single bed in Willesden with its Brentford Nylons fitted sheets and pillow case. (Sorry, am I reminiscing too much here?) In the morning, you'd reluctantly drag your sweating exhausted body away from her charms and set foot out of the bed only...
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When Pussy Surpassed Fanny as the Nation’s Favourite
Throughout the early 1960s, in darkened rooms, an astonished nation would peer at its flickering black and white “television sets” on a regular basis at peak viewing times, aghast at what it was seeing. Before the populace’s very eyes, both young and...
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Muslim Prostitute Arrested In West Yorkshire Town
Guy with worlds biggest penis dates gal with worlds smallest vagina
Vacuum cleaner sex attachment to 'polish' you off
Man Tells Wife He Has No Idea Why Amazon Sent Giant Black Item To Him
Dairy Queen denies "sexism" charges
Bird With Big Tits To Be Next Conservative Leader
Prince Andrew's Sphincter Is Twitching
Pooner - The True Origin Of The Word Finally Unearthed
Arabic Porno Magazine Goes On Sale From Today
Tropical Storm Humberto - A Danger To Young Girls
Prince Andrew To Do Second TV Interview
President Trump May Have Been Given Blow Job By Anne Sacoolas
Man Is Sick And Tired Of Seeing The Same Advert
A man has complained about what he says is a systematic attempt to make him buy stuff, after he was repeatedly exposed to a particular advertizement whilst using the internet this very morning. The man, Moys Kenwood, 56, told of how, throughout hi...
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TheSpoof.com To End Its Association With Prince Andrew
In the last few minutes, it's been revealed that, due to the ongoing furore with regard to some rather potentially damaging underage sex allegations, the satirical news website TheSpoof.com has decided to drop all its current associations with the ar...
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Kate Silverton Lipstick Application Sparks Viewer Complaints
The sexy BBC newsreader, Kate Silverton, is in trouble with her bosses, after more than 2500 viewers rang the Beeb yesterday afternoon to complain that the vampish presenter's lips were "too pink", and that she was putting many of them off their lunc...
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Man In Potato Chips Advert Was Wearing Far Too Much Lipstick
A male actor in a TV advertisement for some potato chips, was wearing an extraordinary amount of lipstick, leading one viewer to think, not unreasonably, that the man might have been a homosexual. The chips, Jacks, a product by Calbee, are delicio...
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Harvey Weinstein Fondles Cellmate's Testicles
Harvey Weinstein, the former Hollywood movie producer who, on Monday, was convicted of rape and sexual assault at his trial in New York City, and now faces up to 25 years in jail, has already landed himself in hot water after allegedly fondling the t...
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Survey: More of Britain's elderly now send grandchildren to bed early so they can have sex
According to a recent report, there has been a sharp increase in the number of people over 60 who are sending their grandchildren to bed early so that they can have sex on the sofa. With many parents using their own mothers and fathers to take car...
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Sex House Reports Drastic Reduction In Number Of Unemployed
There were frowns and awkward sideways glances this week, when it was noticed that a city centre unemployment office had remarkably metamorphisised into something less savoury, it's fair to say. Essex House, the Unemployment Benefit Office on the...
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Nude Jamie Lee Curtis Shots Show Her Boobs Are Still In Good Shape
The hot news from Hollywoodland, according to unmanned sources (?) appears to be that Jamie Lee Curtis's breasts are more or less as firm and malleable as they were when she first exposed them, in the Eddie Murphy comedy vehicle, Trading Places with...
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Where are they now? Sexy Nurses' Uniforms
Once upon a time being an inpatient, outpatient or visitor to hospital had its upside. I'm talking of course about those nurses in their candy-striped little uniforms with their starched white aprons and their tiny lace hats perched on top of their p...
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Miley Cyrus Vagina Now More Popular Than Britney Spears Vagina
There was great excitement in the entertainment sector today when the results of a nationwide survey revealed that the vagina owned by Miley Cyrus is now more popular than that of Britney Spears. The vaginas, both very similar in design, are curre...
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Bill Cosby Doing 'Funny Face' Requests For Fellow Prisoners
Bill Cosby, the convicted sex assailant, who was recently sentenced to between 3 and 10 years behind bars for aggravated indecent sexual assault, has been entertaining his fellow prisoners with a display of his 'funny faces'. Cosby, 81, starred in...
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Prostitutes In Pueblo, Colorado Are Reportedly Acceptiing Marijuana In Lieu of Cash
PUEBLO, Colorado - A member of The Pueblo City Council has just informed the public that they've learned that prostitutes working the downtown area of Pueblo have developed a new payment method. It appears that the streetwalkers are now accepting...
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Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders Reunion Party Ends In Chaos And Disgrace
A reunion party organised for past members of the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders has ended in controversy, uproar, chaos and disgrace. The party, last Wednesday at Texas Stadium, started well enough, with singing and dancing on a huge stage on the fi...
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Bill Cosby Found With Two Drumsticks Shoved Up His Rectum
There were scenes of total panic at 'unlock' this morning, when jailed comedian, Bill Cosby, was found in his cell with a pair of drumsticks shoved up his anus. Cosby, star of 'The Cosby Show', and co-writer of the show's theme tune, 'Kiss Me', us...
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Conjoined Twins Marry Conjoined Twins, Having Sex Problems
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BBC Sports Commentator Sets Precedent by Using the Word "Unprecedented"
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Man Got Huge Hard-on Whilst Looking At Catalogue
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You Know You're Old...Further Thoughts...
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ITVBe Announces Improved Intellectual Content With Updated "Real Housewives" Franchise
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Kate Middleton Thinks Roger Federer Is A Bit Dishy
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Harry Maguire Is Going To Smash Prince Andrew's Face In, If He Sees Him
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Pizza Express In Woking Have Never Heard Of Prince Andrew
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Ghislaine Maxwell Spotted In Fish Shop
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Prince Andrew Denies Ever Having Met The Queen
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Peaches Geldof Fury Over Topless Tattoo Booze-Fuelled Naked Heroin Viagra Scientology Sex Pics
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Cloud In Shape Of Penis Draws Big Crowd
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Woman Kicks Man In Gonads
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London Hospital Denies Offering Sexual Favours from Nurses
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Man Became Sexually Aroused In Queue At Bakery
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Unhappy Couple Role-Play Themselves into Relationship Success
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Prince Edward Says Prince Andrew Has Been A Silly-Billy
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Prince Andrew To Meet Virginia Face-To-Face To See If She Can Jog His Memory
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Prince Andrew To Cut All Ties With Prince Andrew
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Nashville Man Cleared of Douchebag Allegations
