RICHMOND, Virginia - (Satire News) - The Alpha Beta News Agency has just announced that Sen. Michelle Kettlewood (D-Appomattox), who voted against banning porn in the state of Virginia has now made news.
Sen. Kettlewood, 48, who every male senator in the state considers to be the absolute most beautiful senator that they have ever seen, has just revealed that she is addicted to sex.
Kettlewood told Mimosa Sabrosa with ABNA, that she has been hiding the fact for over 25 years, that she is in fact afflicted with Sexafeenatosis, which in essence means that she is a nymphomaniac.
Michelle, who has been married and divorced four times, told Miss Sabrosa that she recently caught her boyfriend of 2 years Roland F. McPryor, 29, jacking off to a photo of Laura "Trigger Face" Ingraham of Fox News.
SIDENOTE: Sabrosa adds that on a scale of 1 to 10, Ingraham is a low 2, while Kettlewood is a 12 plus!
