Yes, I'm old. Old as dirt. Fortunately, it's still proper etiquette for a woman not to have to reveal her age, so I won't. I will say, I'm old enough to remember when women protested the objectification, suppression, and dominance of men by burning bras in America's streets. I gleefully threw my symbol of male bondage on the burning alter of women's rights. I admit, not much of an offering at the time. Things did change as I matured.
The other day I was online chatting with a very nice young man who was about 30 years younger than me. It was in one of those chat rooms where the person's age was obviously displayed. After what I thought was a fairly meaningful dialog, he asked: "So what do you like to do, Granny?" "Granny", I thought to myself, how humiliating is that? I replied: "You know, the usual: Gardening, baking, sitting in my favorite rocking chair knitting baby booties for the grandkids. And, getting me a good pussy pounding." Shocked, he asked: "What?!!!" I answered: "You know, with all the nasty political shenanigans going on these days and political correctness, I get frustrated and want to take it out on something."
For you reading this, it's not what you think, you perverts. I meant discipline my kitty when she is naughty. I wash her, groom her, gently caress her, then she drools on my white silk divan. That makes me want to give her a pounding. No, I'm not cruel. I don't use a rubber hose, a broom stick handle, or a rolling pin - just my hands. I suppose, if some humane society advocate or government agency finds out about it, they will come take my little kitty away. That would make me sad - we have been together a long time - it's like she is part of me. My kitty has given me a great deal of pleasure over the years. Purrrrrrrrrrr.
When the grandkids come over to stay the weekend, what do you think the first thing they ask me is? Right! "Granny, did you get a pussy pounding this week?" I always answer the same: "Of course, sweethearts, you know I have gotten old and cranky, and need a good pussy pounding almost daily to calm my nerves. This week I even screamed at her like a school girl afterwards."
The grandkids tell me their mother thinks I'm a menace to society, probably senile, and she is starting to be afraid to send the kids over to spend the weekend. I tell her: "Don't worry, dear, I'll keep my little kitty out of sight when the kids are here." She knows I have a lot of kitty toys, fearing I'll leave some on the floor where the kids might trip over them. I might be old and forgetful, but I never leave my toys out after my kitty and me have played with them.
When you get old it's important to stay in shape. The same goes for kitty. I hate seeing her just moping around. I love doing yoga, stretching my legs as far apart as possible while my kitty joins in the exercise. She seems to enjoy it too. I know I do. Mmmmmmmm.
