There were 397 spoof news stories published in October 2013. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.
Busted! Twitter Birdies Accused of Insider Trading
Three twitter birdies are accused of making a bundle by breaking the law. As Twitter plans its first public offering of stock, the three birds are accused of tweeting inside financial information to a few traders willing to pay for it. Law enfo...
Read full storyMice Furious about Forced Participation in Hair Growth Study
When Gail Farrelly, Science & Technology reporter at The Spoof.com, read a Bloomberg.com article, "Mouse Study May Target Hair Growth Method for Baldness," she knew she had found the subjects for her next in-depth profile. The first sentence...
Read full storyIrate Gorilla Evicted from Dallas Zoo: First Interview
In case you keep in touch with the 23-year-old gorilla, Patrick, formerly of the Dallas Zoo, be advised that you should record a change of address. He's moving to South Carolina. Gail Farrelly, a Science & Technology reporter at TheSpoof.co...
Read full storyLow Approval Numbers Force the Tea Party to Change Its Brand
Washington, DC - Registering approval ratings as low as 22% in recent polls, the United States Tea Party would rather fright than quit. The reactionary wing of the GOP is changing its name from the Tea Party to the Costume Party. "Voters love us,...
Read full storyA Furiously Jealous Faith Hill Is Becoming The Wicked Witch of The South
FRANKLIN, Tennessee - A close unnamed friend of Tim McGraw and his wife Faith Hill has stated that the couple seem to be carrying on more and more like the Hatfields and McCoys. The source said that it all stems from Hill being upset at the fact t...
Read full storyNSA sneaks into damp basement tea party meeting on government shutdown etc
Anonymous NSA sources are now revealing the latest surveillance deep inside an old textbook building where current tea party aficionados are planning strategy. The nature of this surveillance is not clear although deployment of tiny insect drones...
Read full storyRussell Brand May Be Moving To The Rocky Mountain Pot Haven State of Colorado
WEST HOLLYWOOD - Russell Brand has informed several close friends that he is giving serious consideration to leaving the bright lights of Tinsel Town and moving to the mystical marijuana air state of Colorado. Brand has made it clear that lately...
Read full storyHugh Hefner To Sell His Playboy Mansion
HOLMBY HILLS, California - Hugh Hefner, who is 87, has just announced that he plans to sell his California Playboy Mansion and build a new, bigger one in Denver, Colorado. The Playboy Magazine mogul told Tittle Tattle Tonight's Pico de Gallo that...
Read full storyKate Gosselin Hurting Financially Admits She Is Thinking About Posing Nude In Playguy
READING, Pennsylvania - The former star of two reality shows Jon and Kate Plus 8 and Kate Plus 8, has confided to David Letterman that she is having some financial problems. Kate told Letterman that he has no idea how quick 8 kids can go through a...
Read full storyWillie Nelson and Miley Cyrus To Host Colorado's 1st Annual Miss Marijuana Beauty Pageant
DENVER - The Rocky Mountain State has just announced that it will be hosting one of the best beauty pageants in the history of beauty pageants. Representatives with Colorado's 1st Annual Miss Marijuana Beauty Pageant have said that all of the page...
Read full storyThe Mars Land Rover Curiosity Makes An Astonishing Discovery!
HOUSTON - NASA has just reported what is being hailed as an amazing discovery that was made by the Mars Land Rover Curiosity. According to high ranking NASA officials the land rover has discovered over 30 arrowheads that laid buried one foot benea...
Read full storyParis Hilton's Erotically Revealing Upskirt Shot Was Staged
WEST HOLLYWOOD - Paris Hilton recently told a friend that she was going to have to do something to get herself back on the front pages of the Tinsel Town publications and celebrity news programs. So she and an old high school girlfriend identified...
Read full storyKirstie Alley Sees A Vision of Leah Remini On Her Biscuit
BEVERLY HILLS - Kirstie Alley's obsession with insulting Leah Remini simply because she decided to leave the Church of The Scientific Method is starting to border on scariness. Alley has continued her one-woman lambasting of the former King of Que...
Read full storyTea Party accused of turning John Boehner into a zombie
Washington DC -- House Speaker John Boehner (R-Ohio) has been forced to join "the cult of the living dead," according to Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi and other congressional leaders. They charge that the Tea Party branch of the GOP has transformed the...
Read full storyBetty White Says The Controversial Drugs Did Not Belong To Her
EL PASO - Actress Betty White was detained for a couple of hours by the United States customs agents in the port city of El Paso, Texas after crossing over from Juarez, Mexico. A representative with the U.S. Immigration Department stated that the...
Read full storyA List of 10 Albums That Did Not Sell
CHICAGO - The Amalgamated Data Gathering Agency has just issued its yearly list of 10 albums that did not make it off the record store and retail store shelves. Every year hundreds of recording artists go into the recording studio in hopes of hopefully recording the next Thriller by Michael Jackson, Rumours by Fleetwood Mac, or Born In The USA by Bruce Springsteen. But sad to say a good numb...
Read full storyA Montana Mountain Climbing Team Is The First To Climb Mt. Everest While Totally Naked
MISSOULA, Montana - The Wagner F. Higginfroist Mountain Climbing Team from Missoula has just made mountain climbing history. Team leader Higginfroist said that they have successfully climbed Mt. Everest which is 29,028 feet tall. He then noted...
Read full storyJodie Foster Falls Head Over Heels For Ellen DeGeneres' Ex-Girlfriend Alexandra Hedison
HOLLYWOOD - Jodie Foster says that Ellen DeGeneres is acting like a 16-year-old school girl and she really needs to look in the mirror and see that she's actually a 55-year-old cougar. Foster is very upset at the fact that the talk show maven has...
Read full storyNevada Votes To Outlaw Texting During Sex
CARSON CITY, Nevada - In a move that state senators hope will help to ease the rising divorce rate in the state, the Nevada Senate has voted 17-4 to outlaw texting during the sex act. One senator, who asked that we not reveal his name, said that h...
Read full storyIowa Becomes The First State In The Nation To Ban Gay Dancing
SIOUX CITY, Iowa - The state of Iowa has just become the first state in the United States that has taken a stand against gay dancing. Reports from the Hawkeye State say that the bill was passed by a vote of 39 to 11. A source within the governo...
Read full storyFeds poised to swoop on Roman Abramovich's $75m Fifth Avenue pad
New York - Buoyed by last month's seizure of a $700million Iranian money laundering tower at 650 Fifth Avenue the FBI is about to flex its repo muscles once again just a half dozen blocks up the prime Manhattan street. The object of their interest...
Read full storyThe NFL Plans To Ban Biting
NEW YORK CITY - The National Football League has just issued a statement that it will soon be implementing a ban on biting. Word from Commissioner Roger Goodell's office is that since the start of the 2013 NFL football season there have been at le...
Read full storyTop 10 Ways To Annoy The Tea Party
The Tea Party is a group of political hacks who have hijacked Congress, shut down the government, and polluted vast stretches of the Infosphere with their antisocial notions and out of order tactics. Sure, they were entertaining at first, offering earnest explanations of how a bill becomes a hate crime. But Tea Party demagogue Ted Cruz has stopped being funny and has become just annoying. Now...
Read full storyA List of 10 Peanuts Halloween Specials
The comic strip Peanuts first appeared in newspapers on October 2, 1950. It was written by Charles M. Schulz. Initially the comic strip only included one character, an 8½-year-old boy named Charlie Brown. But Schulz quickly realized that one little boy would not be enough to carry a comic strip that was read nationwide. And soon other characters arrived. Some came and went never to be see...
Read full storyNFL officials to referee Congress
Washington DC - The National Football League has volunteered its squad of on-field officials to "referee" Congress. In announcing the arrangement, NFL commissioner Roger Goodell noted that his army of referees, field judges, umpires, linesmen, an...
Read full storyThe NFL May Be Doing Away With Team Huddles
NEW YORK CITY - The Sports Bet Gazette is reporting that the National Football League is looking into the possibility of doing away with team huddles. SBG reporter Zorro La Bamba met with NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell at a local Pompous Pizza Par...
Read full storyKris Jenner Admits That Husband Bruce Jenner's Crossdressing Had Nothing At All To Do With Their Breakup
HOLLYWOOD HILLS - After almost a year of speculation and innuendo, it is now official that the heads of the Kardashian Klan, Bruce and Kris Jenner have separated. A close source said that the two had spent the last year pretty much living like bro...
Read full storyMovie Studio Says Gay Superman Movie Will Not Fly
HOLLYWOOD - A representative with Universal Studios has said that his company will be pulling the movie Superman's Secret in which Superman is portrayed as being gay. The studio execs reportedly received thousands of emails, text messages, and pho...
Read full storyMaria Sharapova Says Miley Cyrus Is Addicted To The Spotlight
NEW YORK CITY - One of the greatest tennis players in the world Maria Sharapova recently remarked about the girl who has no shame Miley Cyrus. Sharapova told Hercules Confetti with Sporting Chance Magazine that she really feels sorry for the 20-ye...
Read full storyWashington Redskins to Change Name to Redass Monkeys
The Washington Redskins or should I say, the former Washington Redskins, have officially changed their name to the Washington Redass Monkeys according to a spokesman for the team Saturday. "We're tired of being pointed out by nut jobs", stated the...
Read full storyJesse Ventura, Howard Stern Announce Running For High Office In 2016
It became official, Jesse Ventura and Howard Stern are going to be fighting it out for the Presidency and Vice Presidency of the United States of America in the 2016 elections. Last week Jesse Ventura was being interviewed on The Howard Stern Show...
Read full storyNBA Fans To Be Prohibited From Yelling Out The Irritatingly Boring Phrase 'Deee-Fense'
NEW YORK CITY - The NBA after much consideration has decided that it will be prohibiting fans from hollering out the phrase "Deee-Fense!" whenever the opposing team gets the ball. An NBA spokesperson likened the yelling out of that phrase as kind...
Read full storyOver-Eating Could Lead to Obesity, Study Shows
PHILADELPHIA--A recent study shows that over-eating may be one of the leading causes of obesity in Americans age 9-72. The Foundation for American Thickness Today and Yesterday (FATTY) issued the report last week, detailing the findings of their y...
Read full storyKim Jong Un Tells Dennis Rodman To Get Him A Date With Britney Spears
NEW YORK CITY - Dennis Rodman, the former NBA star whom North Korean leader Kim Jong Un calls his BFF, has just been told by Kim to see about getting him a date with one of his favorite American celebrities Britney Spears. Kim Jong Un reportedly t...
Read full storySteven Donziger's face materializes on slice of toasted Wonderbread
New York - Some judges breakfasting at a Manhattan cafeteria close to next week's RICO racketeering and corruption lawsuit were gobsmacked this morning when an apparition of Ecuador Amazonbotch shyster lawyer Steven Donziger popped up on a slice of t...
Read full storyMichelle Obama calls in White House ghostbusters at phantom pregnancy reports
Washington - Someone who should know better has ghost-written a baby according to a pre-Halloween sweep of the White House septic tank. Spooky pest control operatives hired by the First Lady found half a dozen piss test swabs following a plumbing...
Read full storyKatie Holmes Confesses That New Boyfriend Jamie Foxx Is 10 Times More Fun Than Ex-Husband Tom Cruise Was
NEW YORK CITY - Sweet little Katie Holmes is thrilled at the fact that she has a new boyfriend. Holmes is reportedly on Cloud 9 since she has been hitting the dating scene with Jamie Foxx star of Django Unchained. The 34-year-old brunette pixie...
Read full storyDolly Parton Says She Wants To Adopt Justin Bieber and Lindsay Lohan
NASHVILLE - The legendary country music queen Dolly Parton appeared on The Viagra View and she told Regis Philbin that she would be willing to adopt both Justin Bieber and Lindsay Lohan. Parton, who never had children of her own, said that she tru...
Read full storyAn 88-Year-Old Great Grandmother Admits She Shot Down A Drone
ARKADELPHIA, Arkansas - Mildred P. Pettypicker, 88, has just admitted to the Arkadelphia Police Department that she shot a drone as it was flying over her and her husband, Elmer Ted's okra farm. Mildred told investigating officers that she shot it...
Read full storyBad breath rates 'rise when economy is booming'
Bad breath rates among middle-aged workers go up during economic booms and dip when we are heading for a recession, according to W.H.O. (World Halitosis Organization). These breath-taking findings come from a survey of the GDP and bad-breath rates...
Read full storyPETA Vows To Make Research Clinics Stop Forcing Hamsters To Smoke Marijuana
NORFOLK, Virginia - The largest animal rights group in the United States has vowed to stop several animal research clinics from mistreating hamsters. Mimosa Ledbetter the executive director has said that she sent undercover operatives who infiltra...
Read full storyBrooklyn Mob Boss Tells Kirstie Alley To Stop Messing With Leah Remini
BROOKLYN - Salvatore Goombalini, the head of the notorious Goombalini family, has issued a message to Kirstie Alley and the other members of the Church of The Scientific Method. The Brooklyn Mob boss stated in no uncertain terms that Alley better...
Read full storyChicharito Buys Cheryl Cole A $12.7 Million Hacienda In Cabo San Lucas, Mexico
CABO SAN LUCAS, Mexico - Mexico's super star soccer player Javier Hernández Balcázar, known as Chicharito, has just revealed that he has purchased a luxurious hacienda overlooking Cabo San Lucas. The $12.7 million hacienda was originally owned by...
Read full storySchool district bans students from asking questions in class
Mercer County, N.J. - In an effort to increase standardized test scores and prevent a state takeover, a New Jersey school district has banned its students from asking questions in class. A letter from the superintendent announcing the ban was post...
Read full storyUS Celebs Form New Country And Western Group
Donald Rumsfeld, Condoleezza Rice, Tony Blair, George Bush And Barack O'Bama have formed a new Country and Western Band called Fuk-U-All. And guess what? They have a new line-dance to go with it! Called "The Democracy". Blair, of course, alwa...
Read full storyGove Solves Series of Maths Problems
After failing to demonstrate an understanding of averages, Secretary of State for Education Michael Gove has defied critics by completing a series of maths problems, aimed at 4-5 year-old children. He added and subtracted with ease, and even tackled...
Read full storyKim Jong Un Has A Crush On Jessica Simpson
HOLLYWOOD - Jessica Simpson has just received a certified letter from North Korean leader Kim Jong Un and the star of The Dukes of Hazzard movie is quite bewildered to say the least. Kim Jong Un, who is married, told her that he heard that she alr...
Read full storyPresident Obama: The Heck With Everything - I'm Going To Take A Much Needed Vacation To Dubai
WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Obama has told Vice-President Joe Biden that he is handing him the reins for a while as he will be flying out to Dubai, India to take a much needed vacation. He noted that the darn Republicans are giving him about seve...
Read full storyDue To The TSA Upskirt Photo Scandal Female Passengers Are Urged To Wear Pants
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The Transportation Safety Association trying to regain its credibility has fired the TSA agent who was taking upskirt photos of women passengers with his cell phone. A TSA spokesperson said that his agency promises that the inci...
Read full storyIntimate Pix of Paris Hilton's Bikini Line Reveal A Hint of Cellulite
BEVERLY HILLS - Reports coming out of Tinsel Town are that the celebutante who is known for doing absolutely nothing is feeling very depressed and melancholy. According to Taffeta Kixx with The Gossipette Gazette, Paris is positively devastated at...
Read full storyPresident Obama Brings Happiness To A Child
US President, Barack Obama, today brought a delighted smile to the face of a ten year old English girl. 'I lost my mobile phone last month,' explained Sophie Harris from Cornwall, England. 'I was really, really upset as it had details of all my fr...
Read full storyLindsay Lohan Laughs At The Pregnant Rumors
HOLLYWOOD HILLS - The latest rumor fresh out of the Left Coast Rumor Mills is that Lindsay Lohan is now as they say in Utah, with child. Lohan who spent most of her summer in rehab laughed as she told Carolina Chipotle with Bedroom Pillow Talk tha...
Read full storyShyster lawyers in Caribbean slavery compensation scam
Caribbean - "A classic, Ecuador-style bit of legalistic bullshit," is how constitutional experts have described some Brit shyster lawyers' attempts to sue the governments of the UK, France and Holland for acts of slavery committed by private individ...
Read full storyNina Dobrev Explains Why Kristen Stewart Will Never Appear On The Vampire Diaries
LOS ANGELES - Nina Dobrev, star of The Vampire Diaries, has on several occasions made it known that she does not care one bit for Kristen Stewart. Dobrev explained that her feelings go back several years when K-Stew first started working on the fi...
Read full storyUS super majors shun Brazilian auction
Sao Paulo - A $7 billion [15 billion real] upfront 'signature bonus' demanded by Sao Paulo auctioneers has been slammed by US energy companies as a crude scam amid rumors of a Hugo Chavez-style nationalization of Brazilian oil and gas next year. B...
Read full storyVice-President Joe Biden Opens Up A Burger Diner
DOVER, Delaware - Vice-President Joe Biden proudly announced the opening of his brand new burger restaurant called Vice-President Biden's Burger Diner. The vice-president told Durango Tucker with National Focus Magazine that he has dreamed about o...
Read full storyThe Kentucky Derby Could Be Moving To Detroit
DETROIT - President Obama has just informed the mayor of Detroit that there is a very strong possibility that the famed Kentucky Derby could be moving from Louisville, Kentucky to Detroit, Michigan in 2015. The president told the mayor that the re...
Read full storyChina Recalls 17 Million Chopsticks
HONG KONG - China's national news agency, The Rick Shaw, is reporting that the Chinese government is in the process of recalling 17 million chopsticks. A spokesperson for The Rick Shaw stated that the problem with the chopsticks lies in the fact t...
Read full storyThe Hillary Clinton - Angelina Jolie Feud Escalates
NEW YORK CITY - Larry King, co-host of The Viagra View is reporting that the ongoing feud between former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton and actress Angelina Jolie has gotten worse. It appears that both women are really digging in and tossing o...
Read full story"Second Coming" Come and Gone?
There was a brief moment of what can only be described as pandemonium yesterday near the Lincoln Memorial at Washington's National Mall. A man claiming to be Jesus of Nazareth was seen to walk barefoot across the Reflecting PooL scene of many a p...
Read full storyWe like Fracking and We like to Frack
Another day another punning newspaper headline about shale gas extraction. The industry has been a godsend for copywriters everywhere. Said one fleet street hack, "the great thing about Fracking is that it's possible to replace the word 'fuck', with...
Read full storyClint Eastwood Proclaims He'll Marry As Soon As His Divorce Is Final
CARMEL, California - Clint Eastwood, 83, is in the process of getting divorced from his present wife Dina and he has already expressed the fact that as soon as the divorce goes through he is heading to the alter. The man who popularized the Spaghe...
Read full storyThe Bushes feared FBI's 'Vulcan mind meld' machine would unravel secrets of dead JFK's brain
Washington - More details have emerged about Bobby Kennedy's bizarre theft of his deceased brother's brain from an FBI autopsy slab in 1963 which recent reports have to the presence of an unmatched bullet buried deep inside the President's cerebral c...
Read full storyCatholic Church to be Privatised
The Catholic Church is to be floated on the Stock Market. Cardinal Karl Profiteri of the Holy See's Banca Ambrosiana has announced that the Church is going to be privatised. At a special conclave of bishops the vote was taken last April during th...
Read full storyNew England Patriots Coach Bill Belichick Denies New Cheating Charge
FOXBOROUGH, Massachusetts - Coach Bill Belichick is denying the recent allegations that he used an electronic sound monitoring device to listen in on the opposing team's huddles. According to Sports Balls Illustrated Daily the state-of-the-art dev...
Read full storyWhy Britain doesn't get hurricanes - Explained
The met office have been encouraged to issue a statement today after an influx of queries related to the definition of hurricanes, and why the UK never seems to admit to one. Media sources have cited increasing alarm over projected windspeeds for the...
Read full storyCloned 17-Winged Chicken Will Feed the UK's and USA's Appetites
MANCHESTER - A chicken with 17 wings is more of an agricultural asset than a chicken with only two wings. No Jessica Simpson, Buffalo wings don't come from buffalos, they come from chickens and ravenous Americans can't seem to get enough of them.
Read full storyThe Jacksonville Jaguars Fall To 0-8 As They Are Walloped By The San Francisco 49ers In London
LONDON - London Bridge figuratively fell down right smack dab on the Jaguars of Jacksonville as they were soundly beaten by the San Francisco 49ers 42-10. The NFL game was held in London's Wembley Stadium before a crowd of 83,559, many of whom wer...
Read full storyTaco Bell To Begin Selling A 5-Pound Burrito
IRVINE, California - The largest Mexican food chain in the United States has just announced that they will soon be introducing their new 5-pound burrito. A Taco Bell spokesperson has informed the public that the new menu addition will be available...
Read full storyCrocodile Dundee Is Getting Divorced
NEW YORK CITY - Word has reached the Big Apple that the rugged actor who starred in the Crocodile Dundee movies is headed for Divorce City. Paul Hogan, 74, has just learned that his wife of 23 years, Linda Kozlowski, 54, wants out of their May-Dec...
Read full storyMan Eating Pancakes At Waffle House Questions What Life Has Come To
BOREDVILLE, WI - "I was just trying to clear my head, so I went out for a drive and ended up at a WAFFLE HOUSE," states James Sadzack Sr., 52, of Boredville, WI. Sadzack had recently been interviewed by The Spoof satire writer, Tony Bagodonutz, re...
Read full storyCarrie Underwood's Husband Hints That The Couple Could Be Heading For Divorceville
NASHVILLE - Carrie Underwood has become one of the most popular country artists in the world of country music. She has sold over 15 million albums and her Carrie Underwood Bobblehead Doll has consistently stayed in the top five nationwide. The...
Read full storyChris Brown Prohibited From Ever Setting Foot In Washington D.C.
WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Obama has just issued a Presidential Mandate that he says is the best PM he has issued since becoming president. The president at the strong urging of his wife Michelle Obama, Vice-President Joe Biden, Oprah Winfrey, a...
Read full storyBorder Patrol Agents In Arizona Find 43 Illegal Aliens Crammed Into A KIA Spectra
NOGALES, Arizona - Border Patrol agents in the Nogales sector have reported that they stopped a car 17 miles north of the border that was traveling at a high rate of speed. The car, a 2006 KIA Spectra appeared to have four flat tires. But when age...
Read full storyCollege Professor Astounded Upon Seeing Student Reading ACTUAL BOOK
"In this age of facebook likes, tweeter twits, doo-hickies, smart phones, and zippy dees, it's rare to find young people reading a book," declares Manny Zahrelik, Ph.D, professor of English Literature and Composition at Philistine University. Pro...
Read full storyMountbatten down the hatches as Palace takes brunt of St Jude's Hurricane
London, UK - Buckingham Palace has been blown apart by Hurricane Jude in scenes of mayhem last seen during the Blitz. The massive squall struck soon after midnight ripping the gubbins from the Palace plant room where Prince Harry's eco-friendly hy...
Read full storyWashington DC Overrun By Rats!
When a member of the United States Senate screamed her head off "I just got bit by a rat!" during a speech yesterday, it became obvious to all that the rat problem in Washington DC was totally out of control. Apparently, the Washington shutdown ha...
Read full storyMiley Cyrus Admits Women Are Totally Naked Under Their Clothes
Miley Cyrus has been taking a lot of gruff from the media lately for being naked in her latest video and twerking her butt all over the place. Apparently parents and fans feel Miley is a role model and should be more conservative in her appearances.
Read full storyMans Recent Discovery of the Meaning of Acronym "YOLO" Forces Him to Take Another Look at His "FML" Stance
BOREDVILLE, WI - "I found out from my oldest kid that YOLO means you only live once," stated James Sadzack Sr, 52, of Boredville, WI. "I found out the meaning of FML about three or four years ago," Sadzack went on to say, "and that's the mantra I'...
Read full storyNEW! CrossDressersDating.web -- where every date's a drag!
With great fanfare a new dating service was announced this morning At a press conference in the New Orleans French Quarter. Several hundred cross dressers from around the US gathered to celebrate the occasion. "We are here to dance and sing, froli...
Read full storyModerate Republicans Do an About-face on Gun Control
WASHINGTON, D. C.--With the deepening rift in the Republican Party over the government shutdown, some moderate Republicans are beginning to embrace a more measured approach to gun control. Said one Republican moderate, who remained anonymous for fe...
Read full storyO.J. Simpson Now Says He Fathered Kourtney, Kim, and Khloe Kardashian
LOVELOCK, Nevada - The most famous inmate at Lovelock Correctional Center, O.J. Simpson, has just dropped quite a bombshell. Speaking with Carolina Chipotle of Bedroom Pillow Talk in an isolated area of the prison facility the former NFL great mad...
Read full storyParis Hilton Explains Her Erratic Behavior On The View
NEW YORK CITY - Friends and relatives of Tinsel Town's most famous do-nothing celebutante are still shocked at Paris Hilton's behavior when she was a guest on The View. Hilton appeared on the show dressed in a pair of skimpy Daisy Duke short short...
Read full storyPresident Obama Bet On The Cincinnati Bengals To Upset The New England Patriots and He Won $18,000
WASHINGTON, D.C. - No one in America was happier to see the Cincinnati Bengals hand Tom Brady and the New England Patriots their first loss of the season than the president of the United States. According to Zorro La Bamba with The Sports Bet Gaze...
Read full storyWoman Fakes Orgasm
There were reports of unrest in Southeast Asia this morning after a woman is alleged to have faked an orgasm. The incident took place in the Thai capital of Bangkok during the early evening of Saturday, after a man and his girlfriend had sex in an...
Read full storyMariano Rivera of The New York Yankees Heading For Dancing With The Stars Next Season
NEW YORK - One of the greatest Major League Baseball closers of all time Mariano Rivera was recently asked what he has in mind after he retires from his beloved baseball. The Yankees star smiled and said that he has agreed to be a contestant on ne...
Read full storyThe President's brain really was missing
Dallas, Texas - A Kennedy Clan cloning factory took covert possession of JFK's brain soon after George Bush Junior and wingman Grassi Noel pumped it full of bullets on November 22 1963. And whatever presidential remains lie buried at Arlington Nat...
Read full storyStarbucks Latest Marketing Campaign a "Beacon To Government Officials"
Starbucks Coffee has begun a new marketing campaign billed as a way to call upon Congress to "come together" and stop bickering. From Wednesday to Friday, Starbucks will give away a free tall brewed coffee to any customer in the U.S. who buys anot...
Read full storyMichigan Locals Outraged Over Repeal of Bumper Sticker Laws
A Michigan law enacted in 1929 made it illegal to display a bumper sticker for any group that you're not actually a part of. Earlier in the week, the Michigan House of Representatives unanimously voted to repeal the bizarre and long-unenforced la...
Read full storyAerosmith's Steven Tyler's New Track Inspired by Model
Steven Tyler recently met with a young "man", who is actually a female model posing as a male in print magazine ads. "I just found it so fascinating that I had to write a song about it," states Tyler, legendary front man for the band Aerosmith.
Read full storyPorn Pop - the latest desperate 'music' genre
A new pigeon hole has had to be created to accommodate what is fast becoming and endemic poison on the music scene. Dubbed 'Porn Pop', it encompasses 'artists' such as Rihanna, Lady Gaga, Miley Cyrus and Beyoncé, who although profess to be serious...
Read full storyJenna Bush Hager names Hillary Clinton and Vince Foster as her real biological parents
New York - She's finally spilled the beans on a 20-year mystery that ended with the two-bullet 'suicide' of ex-Rose Law partner Vincenzo Fosterini in a Fort Marcy Park, Virginia, car lot in July 1993. Speaking at a NYC fun-Raisa [sick] for attenti...
Read full storyNina Dobrev Has Blocked Ex-boyfriend Ian Somerhalder's Email
VENICE BEACH, California - Nina Dobrev, the star of The Vampire Diaries, has been seen out and about town with her new love interest Derek Hough of Dancing With The Stars. Carolina Chipotle with Bedroom Pillow Talk has said that the two make a won...
Read full storyBabe Ruth's Other Legend! Janitor Finds Film!
Although it has been shown many times over the years, it is still a big argument over whether Babe Ruth actually pointed to the outfield and then hit a home run in exactly the spot he had pointed to. Or was it all just a freak action that became a le...
Read full storyMail demands Government release list of 'Anti British' residents
The Daily Mail editor Paul Dacre today called on the department of health to release the name of the 15 million people a year who receive treatment on the NHS. He said in his statement. "The NHS is anti British. Having free at point of service health...
Read full storyPro Wrestling Fan Stuck In Early 90's Disparages Recent News Headline
"Why is the World Wrestling Federation getting involved in all this outside bull?" asks Derr Daherr, a devout Hulkamaniac, and long time pro wrestling fan. Mr. Daherr recently saw a headline, WWF seeks to stop Congo sanctuary exploration. In resp...
Read full storyWiccan scorn as David Cameron boasts of baking bread made from 'smart' crop circle wheat flour
Los Angeles - A statement from the Supreme World Wiccan Council HQ has condemned UK leader David Cameron's suggestion that his home baked bread recipe has made him 'more intelligent'. The Brit Prime Minister has said he bakes his own daily loaves...
Read full storyQatari shaikh falls for $8 million talking horse
Doha, Qatar - Not since Dubai ruler Shaikh Mohammed McTomb-Raider's disastrous $10 million punt on Snaafi Dancer in 1982 has the world of thoroughbred bloodstock sales looked so damn pleased with itself. The totally useless unraced son of the lege...
Read full storyZiva David is carrying Jethro Gibbs' baby according to NCIS studio leak
Santa Clarita, California - The special agent's sudden unexplained Season 11 disappearance into the anonymous Israeli/Jordanian hinterland was inevitable once the baby bump began to bulge. Now, according to exclusive insider reports based on a San...
Read full storySaudi airport rolls outs gay detector kits
Arabian Gulf - A bit of nifty detective work has identified the cutting edge security scanners as manufactured under licence in a First Anonymous Bank of Switzerland deal by a secretive, high tech Crawford, Texas corp. The address on the back of t...
Read full storyTea Partiers drink more Vodka than Tea - Polls suggest
A recent Gallup poll conducted over the last weekend seems to suggest that the Tea Party may consider changing its name. While the nation is coping with the shutdown and many families are struggling to find ways to put food and drinks on the table ma...
Read full story