Bad breath rates 'rise when economy is booming'

Written by Joe Leff

Friday, 11 October 2013

Bad breath rates among middle-aged workers go up during economic booms and dip when we are heading for a recession, according to W.H.O. (World Halitosis Organization).

These breath-taking findings come from a survey of the GDP and bad-breath rates of 29 countries between 1950 (when halitosis first became fashionable) and 2012 (when people started blaming halitosis for causing earth tremors).

It seems that when more people work and earn good money, they spend it on fancy food and exotic drinks. They also go out partying more and often forget to brush their teeth properly.

Some of the highest-paid professionals are those who risk their lives by measuring halitosis levels in wealthy people. Very rich people typically live in huge mansions surrounded by moats and electric fences to prevent the spread of halitosis to poor people.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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