The World’s Richest Man, Jeff Bezos Says He'll Purchase The Washington Redskins (Right Now!)
MIAMI – The richest man on Earth has just said that he’ll write Daniel Snyder a check for the Washington Redskins right now. Jeff Bezos, who is worth over $150 billion, has a residence in the D.C. area, so the team would literally be in his backya…
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The Washington Redskins New Name is The Washington Football Team (For Now)
WASHINGTON, D.C. (Funny News) – The no-longer-a-racist owner of the NFL Washington team, Danny Snyder, has just announced that he has made a decision regarding the new team name. “Stressy” Snyder told the sports media that his decision is that he…
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Sunday's Super Bowl Could Be Cancelled Due To Coronavirus
The staging of Super Bowl LIV in Miami this Sunday, 2 February, has been thrown into doubt this morning, after Florida health officials said that events at which there were likely to be large gatherings of people should be given "the utmost considera...
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The NFL Tells Tampa Bay Buccaneers Receiver Rob Gronkowski That His Partying Days Are Over
NEW YORK CITY – (Funny sports story) The NFL has put its cleated foot down and issued a directive that it will not allow any player to be a party animal. The NFL singled out Rob Gronkowski of the Tampa Bay Bucs, who is an infamous party animal. Gr…
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The Washington Redskins Name Has Finally Been Scalped
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Washington team owner Daniel Snyder may be a lot of things, but a dummy is not one of them. The multi-billionaire knows that, when big-time corporate sponsors like Pepsi, Nike, Bank of America, Red Lobster, the FBI, and FedEx, s…
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The NFL Cancels All Preseason Football Games
NEW YORK CITY – The directors of the NFL have announced that, due to the on-going Covid-19 pandemic, they have decided to cancel the preseason. The footballs, down markers, and Gatorade containers are being tucked away safely in stadium storage ro…
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NBC Announces That The Dallas Cowboys–Pittsburgh Steelers Hall of Fame Game Has Been Cancelled
J.J. Witt of The Houston Texans Says He Will Refuse to Wear The New C-19 NFL Face Shield Helmet
New England Patriots' Tom Brady Urges Spoof Writer Not To Bother
New York Jets Coach Says That Ines Sainz Should Dress More Like The Average Drab Looking, Frumpy Female Reporter Instead of Like A Victoria's Secret Model
Tom Brady Quarterback of The Tampa Bay Buccaneers, is Upset That The NFL Season Could be Cancelled
Kicker Misses Game-Winning Attempt, Blames God
Cheerleader Trampled by Football Team Becomes Top YouTube Video
Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders Reunion Party Ends In Chaos And Disgrace
Jennifer Lopez and Shakira Party With The Super Bowl Champs, The Kansas City Chiefs.
Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders To Perform Naked
NFL Bans Trump From Going To or Even Watching NFL Games
Patriot's Quarterback Tom Brady Is Still Very Upset At His Wife Gisele Bundchen's Post Super Bowl "Fumble"
The NFL Reports That 72 Players Have Tested Positive For C-19
NEW YORK CITY – NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell says that there is no need for any alarm at the fact that 72 players are going into quarantine, after testing positive for the Trumpapalooza pandemic virus. Goodell told the news media that the player…
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An 8-Year-Old Boy From Wyoming Can Kick a Football 65 Yards
CHEYENNE, Wyoming – Ever since little Timmy Nix was in his mother’s womb, she knew that he was going to be something special. Mrs. Nix said that she would be sitting on the sofa watching “The Young and the Restless”, and, all of a sudden, little T…
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Miami Dolphins To Ditch 'Dolphins' After Protest
News coming out of the Everglades, this morning, is that the Miami Dolphins are the latest team to come under the spotlight with regard to their name, which, say protestors, undeniably portrays dolphins in a bad light. After the Washington Redskin…
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Miami Dolphins keeping their name
In an immediate response to a story in the news earlier today, it's been confirmed that the Miami Dolphins will not, in fact, be dispensing with the 'Dolphins' part of their name. A spokesman at the franchise said he didn't know how these ridiculo…
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Tampa Bay Buccaneers' Coach Bruce Arians Fears That Most of His Players Will Come Down With the Coronapalooza Virus
TAMPA BAY – Regarding the dreaded Coronavirus pandemic, Bucs coach Bruce Arians has made it very clear that he's no doctor, but he says he doesn’t have to be a firefighter to know that a forest fire is damn hot. Coach A, said that when the Bucs si…
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The Washington Redskins Are In Hot Water as 15 Cheerleaders File Sexual Harassment Charges Against Team Personnel
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Noah was the first person to ever utter the cliché, “When it rains, it pours.” And now, Washington Redskins team owner, Daniel “Woe Is Me” Snyder, can say the same thing ten times over. After finally agreeing to change the team’…
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Washington Redskins New Name Suggestions Pour In
After confirmation, on Monday, that the Washington Redskins were to, finally, ditch their name, there was a rush amongst fans to suggest a new one. Redskins owner, Dan Snyder, who had originally said that he would "never" change the name, or his m…
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The Atlanta Falcons Organization is Considering Moving the Team out of Georgia
ATLANTA – In spite of the ongoing Coronavirus pandemic, the state of Georgia has decided to open up for business. But, although stores are opening up, customers are not exactly flocking back. One Atlanta shop owner, who sells crackers, reported...
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The NFL Has Decided To Do Away With The Traditional Opening Coin Toss
NEW YORK CITY – The NFL has really been beating the bushes trying to find ways to improve the game, in order to draw back the fans once they get the green light to kick the season off (no pun intended). The NFL Committee on Rules has recommended t...
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President Trump Shocks the Sports World By Saying That He Thinks Colin Kaepernick Deserves a Second Chance
PITTSBURGH – The President flew into Pittsburgh to see a specialist about a bone spur that could be forming on his tiny, little right finger. While he was there, he was asked by a reporter with the Pittsburgh Pronouncer-Telegram about the NFL seas...
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Football Running Back Alleges He Had His Balls Fondled During Sexual Assault
A football running back has made a serious claim that his testicles were interfered with by one player in a game last weekend, and that a second player attempted to give him a blow job. Hank Stonker, running back for the San Bernardino Shitehawks,...
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Tom Brady Says He Will Compensate Buccaneers Receiver Chris Goodwin for Giving Up His #12 Jersey
TAMPA BAY – The sports world had been wondering if the new Tampa Bay Buccaneers quarterback Tom Brady, was going to end up having to get a new number, since #12 was already taken by wide receiver Chris Goodwin. There were rumors floating around Fl...
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Douchebag, High School Football Jock To Receive Award For Breaking District's "That's What She Said" Record
Fairbury, Nebraska - A douchebag High School football jock was all smiles today after breaking the district record for the most times one player has said "that's what she said" during a single season of football. Senior, Derren Brown, 17, quarterb...
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Jennifer Lopez and Shakira Turn Down Trump’s Offer To Visit The White House
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Jennifer Lopez and Shakira, two hot erotically sexy Latinas performed what many are saying was the best Super Bowl halftime show in the history of the Super Bowl. JLo and Shakira structed up and down the stage dressed in outfits...
Read full storyFunny Football (American) Headlines
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Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders To Include Men Next Season
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The Dallas Cowboys Organization Silences Melissa Kellerman, The Cowboy Cheerleader Who Was Tackled On The Sidelines
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Pittsburgh Steelers Quarterback Ben Roethlisberger Finally Agrees To Change His Last Name
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Is The NFL Heading Towards Touch Football?
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Ndamukong Suh of The Detroit Lions Furious That He Has Lost His Dirtiest Player In The NFL Title To Richie Incognito of The Miami Dolphins
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The Tampa Bay Buccaneers Are No Longer Winless As They Beat The Miami Dolphins 22-19
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Studies confirm; fantasy football leading cause of mental illness
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The Washington Redskins Owner is Furious – Says He’ll Move the Team Before He Changes the Name
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The Washington Redskins Owner Agrees To Sign 13 Native-American Players
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UCLA Won't Start 2020 Football Season 0-3 for Third Consecutive Year
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Dana Altman Quits As Arkansas Razorbacks Basketball Coach After One Day
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NFL Says NO to Hippies
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BCS Committee Announces Radical New Playoff System
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Brady Bunch Beats Down Braggadocio Blow Hards in Foxboro Blowout!
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Two More Women File Lawsuits Against Brett Favre: It Looks Like "Frisky" Favre Just Keeps On Stepping In It
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Detroit Lions Player Ndamukong Suh Tells The NFL That He Wants To Start Playing Nice
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The NFL Will Soon Start Enforcing The Quarterback's 'No Notes On The Wrist' Rule
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Michael Sam Plans to Protest Against Openly Straight Athletes
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Washington Redskins Paint Visitors' Changing Rooms LGBT Rainbow Colors For Dallas Cowboys Visit
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The Real Reason Why Tom Brady Left The New England Patriots For The Tampa Bay Buccaneers
