NFL Network's Siciliano is determined not to let giant ears slow him down
The NFL Network just announced that afternoon anchor Andrew Siciliano is "scheduled for a surgical procedure" in June to remedy resistance problems caused by his drastically oversized ears. Siciliano recently has griped on a few occasions that the…
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Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders Refuse To Wear Face Masks
The Dallas Cowboys will kick off their season against the Rams on Monday night, but the big news is that the engine room of the team - the cheerleaders - have refused to wear face masks while performing their sideline routines. Cheerleading coach…
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Dallas Cowboys Players 'Snorted Cocaine' At Halftime, Claims Fan
The Dallas Cowboys like to do it the hard way, and they did it the hard way against Atlanta last night, after coming back from a huge first quarter deficit of 20 points, and a 29-10 halftime reverse, to steal the game away from the Falcons 'at the de…
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The NFL Football Season Finally Kicks Off
KANSAS CITY - (Sports Satire) - The NFL season finally kicked off at Kansas City's Arrowhead Stadium, which will soon be changed to The 7th Cavalry Stadium. The St.Louis Outlooker News noted that the namechange will be to appease the Red Lives Ma…
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NFL To Ban The Mentioning Of A Player's College
BOWLING GREEN, Ohio - The National Football League has just instituted a directive that states that beginning with the 2009-2010 season, football announcers and sports commentators will no longer be allowed to mention a player's college everytime the...
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Parents Who Thought Their Son Had A Unique Name Disappointed To Find Out They Were Wrong
A couple who believed they had given their baby son a name that was unique throughout the entire world, have spoken about the disappointment they experienced when they found out they were wrong. Brian and Jackie Smith, from Kansas, already had a d…
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Madden NFL 07 Videogame Recalled; Terrell Owens to be Deleted
Dak Prescott and The Dallas Cowboys Silence The Boo Birds
Cheerleader Trampled by Football Team Becomes Top YouTube Video
NFL Bans Trump From Going To or Even Watching NFL Games
Dallas Cowboys Lose: Jessica Simpson Says, "Ya See It Wasn't Me After all Was It?"
Peyton Manning caught in the act
Tampa Bay Buccaneers Quarterback Tom Brady Says His Helmet Was Too Big
Beyonce Has Just Bought The Tijuana Tamale Packers of Mexico’s Baja California Football League
Brett Favre and Aaron Rodgers Refuse to Play on Same Pro Bowl Team
Boy comes out as straight at high school assembly
The NFL is set to approve players from space
Jennifer Lopez and Shakira Party With The Super Bowl Champs, The Kansas City Chiefs.
Tom Brady is Thrilled That the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are Looking at Signing the World’s Fastest Man – Usain Bolt
TAMPA BAY – (Sports Satire) - Tom Brady, who can hardly wait for the NFL season to begin, stated that he was really excited to hear that the Buccaneers may be signing Usain Bolt – the world’s fastest man. Brady told ESPN-4 that he called up Bolt a…
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NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell Makes a Big Announcement Regarding The Black Lives Matter Movement
NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) - NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell spoke with members of the sports media on the ongoing controversy regarding the kneeling issue. The commissioner wanted to point out that he has ruled that those players who want to…
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Millions of American Males Are Suffering From NFL Football Withdrawal Syndrome
CHICAGO – (Sports Satire) – A scientific journal is reporting that millions of American males have become quite depressed. The American Journal of Sports Withdrawal Maladies has released a study stating that, now that the Super Bowl has been playe…
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Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders Reunion Party Ends In Chaos And Disgrace
A reunion party organised for past members of the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders has ended in controversy, uproar, chaos and disgrace. The party, last Wednesday at Texas Stadium, started well enough, with singing and dancing on a huge stage on the fi...
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The Tijuana Tamale Packers Football Team, Which Is Owned By Beyonce, Win Their Season Opener
TIJUANA, Mexico – (Sports Satire) – Beyonce Knowles, known as Queen B, by her gazillions of devoted fans, is extremely thrilled that her team the Tijuana Tamale Packers won their season opener, by clobbering the visiting Mexicali Maracas by a score o…
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My life as a man #22
Keeping up with the English Jones' My neighbor, Gerry, the British guy who came here 23-years-ago, has a beautiful wife, a very nice home (that he keeps up like a palace), three wonderful adult children, and seven grandchildren. His two grown sons and his one adult daughter were all born in a coal-heated flat in the "South of London," wherever the hell that is. His two eldest grandchildren, a...
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Trump Punishes NFL By Disinviting Stephen Curry to White House
Washington, DC Trump went on Twitter and non-Twitter tirades Monday as he criticized everybody in the NFL, as well as anyone who watches the NFL, for players like Stephen Curry speculating on whether they want to even go to the White House, since it...
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The Play-From-Behind Dallas Cowboys Are Going to Have to Put Their Shovels Away
DALLAS – (Sports Satire) – The Dallas Cowboys seem to have made a habit of digging themselves into a hole, early on in the game, and then having the difficult task of having to play-from-behind. Cowboys owner Jerry Jones told the Sports Bet Gazett…
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The Jacksonville Jaguars May Have to Change Their Name
JACKSONVILLE, Florida – (Sports Satire) – Sports Balls Illustrated Magazine has informed the sports world that the Jacksonville Jaguars could be looking at a lawsuit. It appears that the Jacksonville football team has been using the name Jaguars w…
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We want our Super Bowl "L": Roman numeral fans demand
New York - After 49 years of identifying its Super Bowl events with Roman numerals, the NFL has switched to modern numbering for Super Bowl 50. But the antique counting system is not going down without a fight. A group of accountants and a qu...
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The Washington Redskins Are In Hot Water as 15 Cheerleaders File Sexual Harassment Charges Against Team Personnel
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Noah was the first person to ever utter the cliché, “When it rains, it pours.” And now, Washington Redskins team owner, Daniel “Woe Is Me” Snyder, can say the same thing ten times over. After finally agreeing to change the team’…
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The NFL Announces That It Will Prohibit Cardboard Cut-Out Fans in All NFL Stadiums
NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) - The NFL commissioner has informed the news media that, unlike Major League Baseball, he will not allow the placing of cardboard cut-out fans in NFL stadiums. Commissioner Roger Goodell stated to the press that Cor…
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The Green Bay Packers Announce They Will Be Allowing 200 Season Ticket Holders to Attend Their Opening Home Game
GREEN BAY, Wisconsin – (Sports Satire) - The Green Bay Packers have the distinction of being the only sports team in America that is community-owned. The Packers have 350,000 stockholders, and they have voted 349,967 to 33, to allow 200 of the ol…
Read full storyFunny Football (American) Headlines
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New York Giants Hire Jessica Simpson to Date Tom Brady
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Tiger Woods Chosen To Do The Super Bowl Coin Toss Honors
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Touchdown Jesus protests World Cup
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Barry Bonds planning comeback
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Coming Soon! The Girl's Bikini Hockey League
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Patriots To Replace Brady with "Floating Quarterbacks"
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Super Bowl 2019: A Beginner's Guide
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Nashville Woman Offends Billions by Not Knowing Who Harry Maguire Is
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Tom Brady Now Says He Wants To Quit Football And Become A Standup Comedian
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The NFL Tells Tampa Bay Buccaneers Receiver Rob Gronkowski That His Partying Days Are Over
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NFL Puts Final Limitations On Undefeated New England Patriots In Super Bowl
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Kiffin, Spurrier Say Tebow Should Be Ineligible Because of Foreign Birth
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Vikings Quarterback Brett Favre In One Hell Of A Mess!
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The NFL Refs Are Back!
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American football Patriots get stuffed by England Rugby team!
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Miami Dolphins keeping their name
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The NFL’s Decision to Play or Not Play Keeps Going Back and Forth
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The Unbeaten Pittsburgh Steelers Go Down
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The New York Jets Win Their First Game of The Season
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UCLA Headed For 4th Straight 0-3 Start
