Watertown Man demands chance to start at QB for the Pats

Funny story written by Earthvessel

Tuesday, 11 May 2021

image for Watertown Man demands chance to start at QB for the Pats
Mark and supporters trying to get Belichick's attention

Mark Pettiglio is a good natured, easy-going guy – most of the time that is. His disposition soured after watching Cam Newton play quarterback for his favorite team last season. Mark wasn’t impressed.

“He was missing on passes behind the line of scrimmage! He’d have a guy open in the slot and miss him by 8 feet - I can make those throws!” Mark has played lots of football in his day. He’s also watched the very best play the game and knows what good football looks like.

“I’ve played my share of football and I was pretty good” he says with a confident flair, “and I watched [Tom] Brady play for 20 freakin’ years! I know this offense and I know I could step in there and do a damn good job!”

Mark finally snapped during Game 15 of the season. A 38 – 9 drubbing at the hands of the Buffalo Bills. Late in the 2nd quarter of that loss with his team down 24 – 9, Mark and his people called out the beloved coach Bill Belichick from the stands, with a series of expletive-laden pleas to let him play QB. The shouting went on for several minutes during his teams’ final possession of the half. Then as he tired, he let out a final plea: “Come on coach, just give me a chance!” before sitting down putting his face in his hands.

Mark is mum on whether he’s going to training camp this year, but if he’s going to get a chance, it will have to be soon, he wouldn’t give his age but the word is he’s a few years older than Tom Brady. But Mark doesn’t see age as a problem “I can still play…Brady will play past 60 easy!”

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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