The Washington Redskins Are In Hot Water as 15 Cheerleaders File Sexual Harassment Charges Against Team Personnel

Funny story written by Abel Rodriguez

Friday, 17 July 2020

image for The Washington Redskins Are In Hot Water as 15 Cheerleaders File Sexual Harassment Charges Against Team Personnel
A close friend of team owner Daniel Synder says that he has aged about 25 years just in the past week.

WASHINGTON, D.C. – Noah was the first person to ever utter the cliché, “When it rains, it pours.” And now, Washington Redskins team owner, Daniel “Woe Is Me” Snyder, can say the same thing ten times over.

After finally agreeing to change the team’s racist name, now comes word that 15 former Redskins cheerleaders have filed sexual harassment charges against the team owner and his executives.

The charges range from inappropriate touching, to out-of-line caressing, to verbal abuse, and even having team officials draw happy faces on the cheerleaders' thighs.

Snyder reportedly told his Native-American maid that he has the biggest headache in the history of headaches.

She asked him if he wanted for her to do a ‘headache dance’ to ward off the evil white spirits.

Some of the other charges that the cheerleaders have reported include unwelcomed hugging, forced high-fiving, improper fist-bumping, and undesirable butt-bumping.

Snyder has said that all of those responsible will be suspended, terminated, fired, or perhaps even beaten up.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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