NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) – New York sports fans, like Boston and Philadelphia sports fans, can be downright mean and nasty when it comes to their home teams.
Several years ago, Philadelphia Phillies fans booed the Easter Bunny. And, just last year, Boston Celtics fans booed Sister Dolly, a nun who sang the last two notes of the National Anthem slightly off-key.
Now, Jets owners, the Johnson brothers, Woody and Christopher, in a fit of anger, have fired every one of the 36 Jets cheerleaders.
Woody told the sports media that, since his team is now (0-11), it’s pretty obvious the cheerleading squad, known as the Jettatitas, are not earning the money they are getting paid to cheer the Jets team on to victory.
Meanwhile, one of the cheerleaders, Maddie Riffinski, 24, says she will be meeting with both Johnsons, and will be showing them some very interesting and explicitly provocative 8 by 10 glossy photos.
Miss Riffinski, who is studying to be an attorney, has commented to the media, that she feels, after the Johnsons view the amazing photos, each one of the 36 cheerleaders will be reinstated and muy pronto, as they say over in Spanish Harlem.