There were 1,341 spoof news stories published in May 2009. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.
Woman With World's Largest Vagina Hits Big with 'World's Largest Vagina Monologues'
NEW YORK CITY, NY - After being axed by a TV Channel, the woman with the world's largest vagina told the world that hers was "pissed off," and that it was "not going away." A seasoned Broadway veteran, she responded to her release by network execs...
Read full storyClint Eastwood is Stan Laurel's son - truth revealed at last!
Eddie Large has seen his career revitalised with the overnight success of singer Susan Boyle - many people are claiming they are one and the same- at the most and at the least identical, fraternal twins. Clint Eastwood 53, has also been dogged by...
Read full storyEvolution: Missing Link Found in Nigeria
A Nigerian professor, Idris Dambusa, claims to have found the missing link in the Theory of Evolution and believes his find will seal the argument and turn the theory into a law. The link, according to him, is in a man so disfigured with athritis...
Read full storyMelissa Rivers and Her Mother Joan To Appear Nude In PlayAdult Magazine
NEW YORK CITY - In what is believed to be the first of its kind mens' magazine layout, Melissa Rivers, 41, and her mother Joan Rivers, 75, will be gracing the glossy pages of PlayAdult Men's Magazine in a mother/daughter photo shoot. Melissa was a...
Read full storyThe mother of all e-mail disclaimers!
Please note: This email is intended for the use of the individual addressee(s) named above and may contain information that is confidential, privileged or unsuitable for overly sensitive persons with low self-esteem, no sense of humour or irrational beliefs. If you are not the intended recipient, any dissemination, distribution or copying of this email is not authorized (either explicitly or i...
Read full storyMan With World's Largest Penis and Woman With World's Largest Vagina Snapped Up By ITV
Following their sensational sacking last year, the Man With The World's Largest Penis and the Woman With The World's Largest Vagina have been snapped up by ailing media giant Indiscriminate Television Corporation. (ITV) In an astonishing U-turn, I...
Read full storyHatton Almost Wins In Las Vegas!
Ricky Hatton did himself and his vast army of travelling fans proud here in Las Vegas in the early hours, when the Manchester-based boxer came to within a hairs-breadth of beating Manny Pacquiao in their light-welterweight championship bout at the MG...
Read full storyMan With World's Smallest Penis Website #1
Penis Minus Wilson, (Not his real name) the man with the world's smallest penis, who was second until the recent death of Harvey Tagbone, says that he has the most googled site on the internet. "This really works out great for me", Penis told seve...
Read full storyWanda Sykes To Appear Nude In PlaySista Magazine
CHICAGO - Wanda Sykes, the comedienne who brought the house down at the recent White House Correspondents' Association Dinner will be appearing in the June issue of PlaySista Magazine. The 45-year-old Sykes, who is widely-known for her brusque com...
Read full storyBob the Hermaphrodite has the World's Biggest Penis
In spite of all previous claims to the contrary, a hermaphrodite called Bob actually has the World's Biggest Penis. The Book of World Records has conceded that taking relative body size into account, Bob the Barnacle is the current holder of the tit...
Read full storyIggle Piggle, Upsy Daisy and Makka Pakka held on drugs charge
Three children's TV characters are being held today after a drugs raid uncovered £1000's of heroin and cocaine. Officers from the In The Night Garden drugs squad recovered the drugs after a series of early morning raids carried out on the Pinky Po...
Read full storyWoman With World's Largest Vagina Suffering From World's Largest Yeast Infection
NEW YORK CITY, NY - The year's breakout Broadway sensation, the "World's Largest Vagina Monologues," has been indefinitely cancelled after its star was diagnosed with the world's biggest yeast infection. "I had noticed a slight burning, itching s...
Read full storyPatrick Swayze diagnosed with rare form of Dancer
Colorado - It's been one year since legendary actor/heartthrob Patrick Swayzee, star of Dirty Dancing and Ghost, was diagnosed with Gold Digging Dancer, otherwise known as Kevin Federline Disease. Swayze is thought to have contracted the disease aft...
Read full storyPattinson, Stewart & Crew Of New Moon Avoid Near Riot
Paparazzi photographers in Vancouver nearly caused a small riot over the weekend when word leaked out that the cast stars of Twilight's, New Moon were about to appear outside at the conclusion of the filming. Next a group of fans saw the photograp...
Read full storyWoman With World's Largest Vagina Visited by Ghost of Johnny Cash
RENO, NV - While spending a night at the Reno Casino Hotel, the woman with the world's largest vagina was visited by the ghost of The Man In Black, say sources. Initial reports suggest the hotel was built on the same spot Cash allegedly shot a man,...
Read full storyRobert Pattinson & Kristen Stewart to get married!
Yes, it's true, (well, to be more accurate, false) Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart are going to get married! Pattinson, 22, proposed to Stewart, 19, last weekend in a dream I had. Rob had taken Kris to Hawaii when he took her on a special dat...
Read full storyMan With Largest Penis Sues Chinese Penis Pump Company Over Malfunction Causing Blowout During Porno Audition!
Frost Proof, Fl,/ Home of the State's Biggest Onions & Juiciest Fruits - Disaster in the Sex Industry today as the Man with the World's Largest Penis suffered a severe set back in his career when his guaranteed 'run flat' penis suffered a blow ou...
Read full storyMiss California Endorses Man With World's Largest Penis and Woman With World's Largest Vagina
VISTA, CA - It would seem Carrie Prejean just doesn't seem to know when to leave well enough alone. Earlier today, Prejean spoke up in support of the man with the world's largest penis and the woman with the world's largest vagina, calling them "goo...
Read full storyKatie & Peter: the real reason they broke up - Penelope Cruz spills the beans
Malaga, Spain - Once again I have been called to Spain for an exclusive interview with Penelope Cruz to discuss her knowledge on the very recent Katie Price/Peter Andre Split. "Well it's like this…." Said Cruz with a pout "Jordan is a fat whinging...
Read full storyPiers Morgan May Be Man With World's Largest Penis, Confirms Amanda Holden
LONDON, U.K. - The Nightly Mirror has obtained an exclusive photo indicating its owner may very well be the man with the world's largest penis, though an official measurement has not yet been taken. The person in the photo? Piers Morgan! The ast...
Read full storyMan with World's Largest Penis and Woman with World's Largest Vagina Axed to "Keep Kids Quiet"
DETROIT, MI - Today, the man with the world's largest penis and the woman with the world's largest vagina were axed to "keep [their] damn kids quiet." "I been axin' you all morning to shet up them damn kids!" shouted Roni Witherspoon, 28, a downst...
Read full storyAnother nude photo of Carrie Prejean surfaces
In a stunning upset for staunch right-wing Christian celebrity news hounds, another nude photo of the controversial Miss California USA has made headlines across America, further tarnishing the reputation of models turned beauty queens everywhere.
Read full storyBGT's Janine Gives Sue Son The Big Finger
A sensational turn of events unfolded here in the UK this morning when BGT reject Janine Khalil turned the tables in spectacular fashion over ex-best friend and shameless backstabber Sue Son. "Sue and I will never be friends again," Janine told us...
Read full storyThe President Names Porn Star Stormy Daniels Secretary of Sex
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Louisiana-born porn star Stormy Daniels has just been named by President Barack Obama to head up the newly-established Department of Sex. Miss Daniels, 30, will be the nation's first Secretary of Sex. In her role she will be res...
Read full storyRobert Pattinson, Kristen Stewart Using Stunt Doubles To Trick Paparazzi!
After what has probably been the most riveting week in The Twilight Saga: New Moon, well, photos, it appears that the work in Montepulciano, Italy is done. Lots of people saw Robert Pattison and Kristen Stewart at the Airport Saturday, getting rea...
Read full storyPorn Star Blows World Record Attempt
German porn star, Cora, came unstuck yesterday when she tried to break the world oral sex record by servicing two hundred men, and ended up in the hospital. Cora, who is currently under investigation by the polizei for getting her kit off in a pub...
Read full storyKristen Stewart and Michael Arangano Call It A Day
Yes, you heard it here first (not that it's true), Kristen Stewart and long time boyfriend Michael Arangano have broken up. Michael was caught at a party with a mystery girl and looked as though he was having too much of a good time! Micheal's friend...
Read full storyAmanda Holden wants to appear nude in the final of Britains Got Talent!
Amanda Holden, 47 has expressed her desire to appear nude to JUDGE the final of 'Britain's Got Talent'. Les Dennis's former wife has tried on 300 frocks and has broken down in tears screaming "Nothing suits me". An insider said " Amanda has b...
Read full storyAmerican Idol: "Bikini Girl" and Kara DioGuardi's Backstage Catfight
HOLLYWOOD - In what one Hollywood reporter described as being the most intense catfight since the Katie Couric - Paris Hilton hair-pulling, fingernail-scratching altercation back in early December, Katrina Darrell, better known as Bikini Girl jumped...
Read full storySecond Darwinius Masillae Found
A second 'missing link' fossil has been found in Germany within a few weeks of the first. This specimen is slightly older and not in anywhere near as good condition, but there are sufficient similarities to be sure the animal is the same species.
Read full storyAmanda Holden's secret affair with Piers Morgan - exposed!
London - A secret source has spoken out about an alleged affair between Amanda Holden and co-host of Britain's Got Talent Piers Morgan. The affair allegedly started two months ago while Piers and Amanda were in Scotland judging the Glasgow cont...
Read full storyAdam Lambert Is Asked To Join Led Zeppelin
LONDON - American Idol runnerup Adam Lambert has just announced that he has been asked to join one of the greatest rock and roll bands of all time, Led Zeppelin. The band has been wanting to tour for the past twenty years but lead singer Robert Pl...
Read full storyBGT's Jamie Pugh Fired From Pizza Delivery Job
He may have wowed the audience, the judges, and millions of television viewers with his rendition of 'Bring Him Home' from the muscal production of Les Miserables, but Jamie Pugh, brother of Gladys from Hi De Hi was brought back down to earth with a...
Read full storyMan With World's Smallest Penis Dies Of Triple Cialis/Viagra Cocktail
Johnny "PeePee Gone" Waters, the man with the world's smallest penis has died from an overdose of a triple Cialis/Viagra cocktail according to police in New York City. "We think he had reached his limit with either one of the penis-helpers and tri...
Read full storyKristen Stewart and Brenda Song set to star in Spielberg lesbain epic love story
Teen queens, Kristen Stewart and Brenda Song are set to star in an upcoming Steven Spielberg-directed film, ''I love you, Mary''. Kristen plays a one of the female lead roles, Hannah Burton. The character is reportedly a lesbian and there is supp...
Read full storyPrince Philip Posts Video Of Naked Windsor Sex Romp Couple On Youtube
Windsor, U.K. [UPI] - In what may be considered a first in Royal circles, a couple having sex on the lawn out front of Windsor Castle have had their escapade taped via Royal webcam and posted on Youtube by HRH Prince Philip. "You could say it was...
Read full storyHansel And Gretel Arrested
Hansel and Gretel have been arrested after new DNA evidence has come to light in the case of the roasted 'witch', a cause celebre and scandal which rocked the world a hundred years ago. "We have evidence which suggests that the siblings may have e...
Read full storyBGT's Sue Son Tells Best Mate To Do One
Heartless fiddler and Vanessa Mae wannabe, Sue Son stunned her best mate Janine Khalil in front of millions of viewers in Saturday's BGT instalment by unceremoniously ditching her. The pair initially appeared as instrumental duo, Addicted, but fol...
Read full storyLady Gaga Has A Disco Stick
After seeing her on tour in her creative leotards and jumpsuits, fans have began rumours that Lady Gaga is actually a hermaphrodite. Fans have said that when the singer bends down there is a huge bulge where her poon should be. After many men have...
Read full storyAdam Lambert To Record a Duet With Hollie Steel
SAN DIEGO, California - American Idol runnerup Adam Lambert has stated that he will be recording a song with Britain's Got Talent contestant Holly Steel. The 10-year-old Steel, who is the biological granddaughter of Julie Andrews first wrote Lambe...
Read full storySusan Boyle To Marry Jamie Pugh and Adopt Hollie Steel and Shaheen Jafargholi
LONDON - Susan Boyle on the advice of her family physician Dr. Knowlton Buckminster has decided to slow down and smell the coffee. Boyle who has literally been on a virtual whirlwind spin since her first appearance on Britain's Got Talent has agre...
Read full storyAmerican Idol's "Bikini Girl" Makes Simon Cowell and Randy Jackson Drool
HOLLYWOOD - Katrina Darrell, aka Bikini Girl was back strutting her feminine stuff on the American Idol stage. The 21-year-old pride of Chino Hills, California left little to the imagination as she paraded around in a bikini swimsuit that looked l...
Read full storyBritains Got Talent- Amanda Holden is a fake and sniffs onions to make her cry!
On the penultimate semi-final Amanda Holden, 43 age and 43 Botox injections was caught cutting up onions under her desk to evoke tears. An inside source said this is due to botox rendering her tear ducts redundant, but mainly because she is a heartl...
Read full story'Britains Got Talent' : Hollie Steel forgets words and wins the 'Crying Child Award'.
Lovely little Hollie Steel, 10 (yes she is ten - Dave Solari on U-tube) has won the competition for the cutest crying child award of the BGT competition. Hollie Steel 10, who is a cross between Lena Zavaroni and a Julie Andrews' clone, initially...
Read full storyNorth Korea Declares War on China, Russia, and Japan
PYONGYANG, North Korea - North Korean Leader Kim Jong Il has just announced that effective at 12:01 am Cleveland time, he will be officially entering a declaration of war against China, Russia, and Japan. Kim Jong Il told CNN's Anderson Cooper tha...
Read full storySimon Cowell wants Adam Lambert to be crowned Queen of America
Hollywood California - Simon Cowell wants the United States to crown American Idol screamer Adam Lambert Queen of America. Surly Simon Cowell bantered about the idea of crowning popular singer of American Idol Adam Lambert as Queen of America on h...
Read full storyBritain's Got Talent Stavros Flatley May Miss Final
Greek Irish dancing duet from Cyprus, Stavros Flatley, may not be able to perform in the Britain's Got Talent Final here on Saturday as Demetrios Demetriou, father of Lagi, his dance partner, sustained a fractured metatarsal bone in his left foot fol...
Read full storyTeen queens, Demi Lovato and Debby Ryan Fighting over Joe Jonas
Teen queens, Demi Lovato and Debby Ryan have recently posted Youtube videos declaring their love for Jonas Brother, Joe Jonas and imitating each other. Debby and Demi have been recently involved in a cat fight at coffee shop in L.A. a source clai...
Read full storyChris Moyles - Girlfriend In A Coma - It' s A Big Fat LIE!
Big fat loud mouthed Radio One DJ Chris 'Tubby Wubby' Moyles has lied while using a karaoke machine in a Dulwich bar! The Roly Poly gargantuan pig of a man, who produces more sweat than the nation of Chad and fills his T-shirt like a fat girl in a...
Read full storySpoof writers milk world's largest penis for all its worth, world's largest vagina won't dry up
HOLLYWOOD, CA - Once upon a time, there was a Star Wars trilogy. Each movie in that now historic series released was a blockbuster, and moviemakers have been looking for a recreation of that success ever since. More recently, J.R. Trollkien's boo...
Read full storyTatiana Del Toro Returns To American Idol
HOLLYWOOD - Tatiana Del Toro, the 23-year-old Puerto Rican Singing Drama Queen was back on the American Idol stage for the 'Finale Show.' "Tater Tat" as she was nicknamed by Paris Hilton sat in the audience and was called up to receive an award fo...
Read full storyAdam Lambert and Simon Cowell Spotted In Passionate Embrace
LOS ANGELES - A bystander clicked a cell phone snapshot of American Idol frontrunner Adam Lambert and feisty Simon Cowell passionately embracing in an alley behind the Fox studios. The two were said to be so engulfed with each other that they never...
Read full storyAppearance on Oprah Lands Kirstie Alley Donut Contract
WINSTON-SALEM, NC - Maybe Kirstie Alley isn't a "perfect fit" for Jenny Craig anymore, but that's just fine with donut manufacturer Krispy Dunk. Inspired by her testimonial on Oprah's show Thursday, company executives negotiated a contract and signe...
Read full storyVelma From Scooby Doo: "I'm A Lesbian"
Velma from Scooby Doo has finally come clean about her sexuality in a revealing interview with Dyke magazine. "I'm a lesbian and proud", reveals Velma, who has retired from private investigation to focus on her acting career, admitting that she ho...
Read full storyPope Offers Vatican City as Palestinian Homeland
Pope Benedict shocked the world as his most blatant call for a Palestinian homeland took a surprising turn toward a welcome home. Arab states have used the Palestinian cause time and time again across the decades to rally Arab causes but none hav...
Read full storyAmerican Idol: Simon Cowell has had it!
A stunned silence was observed here on Tuesday night, when Simon Cowell, the chief judge on the hugely popular reality show, American Idol got enraged and stormed out the studio during a live broadcast. This followed after one of the contestants g...
Read full storyAngelina Jolie is compromised in lesbian love affair
In a statement to reporters, Jenny Shimizu, Angelina Jolie's old lesbian flame, says she forced Angelina Jolie to play the role of a man during their ten year lesbian affair. According to Jenny Shimizu, Angelina Jolie is an unbelievable butch lov...
Read full storyKinga Legg murder mystery: Sarkozy denies Hotel Bristol Palin links
Paris, France - (Pont d'Alma Mater Mess): First it was slinky model Katoucha Niane, fished out from the River Seine after a public slanging match about the size of Carla Bruni's ass. Then last week Spiderman-3 actress Lucy Gordon's lifeless body w...
Read full storyHatton Announces Plan To Fight With Hat On In The Future
Ricky Hatton, the Manchester-based boxer who was so unceremoniously dumped onto the canvas at the weekend by Filipino pocket dynamo Manny Pacquiao, has said that, in all future championship bouts, he will fight opponents wearing his trusty sunhat.
Read full storySpoof Receives Scary 'Chain Letter' That We Want To Share With You
The 'chain letter' you are now reading has been circulating the Internet lately and has disturbed many viewers. It states that if you do not send this article on to twenty other viewers within 48 hours that you will die a horrible, screaming death,...
Read full storyNew Apple "High Phone" Doubles as a Smokeless Bong
Seattle, WA - Apple announced today that it has perfected the "High Phone" - the first cellular phone that also functions as a smokeless bong (a water pipe, generally used to smoke cannabis, but also makes a great vase). Apple has nicknamed the ta...
Read full storyQueen Wants American Idol Adam Lambert As Frontman
BUCKINGHAM PALACE, London - HRH Queen Elizabeth has announced that she would like to step aside so that American Idol Adam Lambert can be the frontman for the Royal Family of Great Britain and the Commonwealth of Nations. The official word from th...
Read full storyKatie and Peter split
A major editorial in the Cheam Courier has explained the split between Katie and Peter in more detail. It would seem that Katie and Peter Smith had gone to their local gastropub for Sunday night dinner. Peter ordered a chilli con carne and was und...
Read full storyIs Susan Boyle's Boyfriend Breaking Her Heart?
According to several reports on the internet lately, Susan Boyle's love life has hit a snag as the man she loves, 66-year-old, Helmut Glaser from back home has no plans to marry at the present time. Boyle apparently met Mr. Glaser, a German immigr...
Read full storyBritain's Got Talent - 'Glad Jamie Pugh lost cos he gots on my bristols' says tosser Amanda!
Loopy- too- big- for- her- shoes Amanda Holden, 43 told a bum-rag newspaper she thought that pizza delivery driver Jamie Pugh had not been "genuine" during his performance of "Bring Him Home" from Les Miserables and said that she wished that she had...
Read full storyLucy Gordon 'was no Katoucha Niane' gendarmes tell Sarkozy
Paris - (Pont d'Alma Mater Mess): "Merde alors! Incroyable, imbecile!" That was the reassuring view of Paris police this week as the bombshell of Spiderman 3 actress Lucy Gordon's suicide galvanised the French conspiracy theory industry into root...
Read full storyJennifer Aniston Blows Her Top!
Jennifer Aniston has lost her cool completely according to her friends and showing how deeply bitter she is about her ex, John Mayer's highly publicized romp with 23-year old cocktail waitress, Scheana Marie Jancan. "He sure tries to pick them yo...
Read full storyRihanna Found Out Eloping With Chris Brown
Rihanna recently just got former boyfriend Chris Brown charged with domestic violence. We also recently discovered that Chris Brown somehow got Rihanna to agree to marry him, so the charges would be dropped. Chris Brown was seen in a jewelry store...
Read full storyAmerican Idol's "Bikini Girl" and Kara DioGuardi Kiss and Make Up (Sort Of)
HOLLYWOOD - Katrina Darrell, better known as Bikini Girl was singing her heart out on Mariah Carey's song "Vision Of Love" on the season finale of American Idol when judge Kara DioGuardi walked out on stage behind her (and upstaged her). Bikini Gi...
Read full storyRihanna Licks Chris Brown's Wounds Outside NYC Strip Club
When Rapper and Sesame Street Tough Chris Brown learned that his former girlfriend and DV victim Rihanna was having a ball watching male strippers show theirs, he had his very own shit fit. Brown sent his body guards into the club, Manly Balls and...
Read full storyPenelope Cruz spills the beans on Tom's break-up with Nicole
Malaga, Spain - Penelope Cruz has confessed in a candid interview why Tom Cruise broke up with Nicole Kidman (yes, the cheque has cleared). "As you know" said Cruz "Tom is the world's leading scientist. Nicole wasn't very scientific at all. She...
Read full storyBrenda Song & Vanessa Hudgens diss Twilight after landing roles in Eclipse, yawn.
Vanessa Hudgens and Brenda Song have reportedly landed big roles in the third Twilight movie, Eclipse which will start shooting next year in March. Vanessa has been cast as Lauren Mallory, the typical blonde ''mean girl'' at Forks who becomes je...
Read full storyMarilyn Manson's ex-wife claims he reads War & Peace and adopts abandoned Chihuahuas
Salem, SA - "Satanic" rocker Marilyn Manson's ex-wife Dita Von Teese has claimed he is not what he seems. Many people think Manson is a Satan-worshiping, lamb sacrificing freak. Not so, says Von Teese, who was married to the man for several yea...
Read full storyBitter - Amanda Holden buzzes belly dancer, Julia Naidenko due to 'bimbo rage!'
Resident totty and not much else Amanda Holden 45, buzzed the Latvian siren belly dancer as she gyrated and bumped her way through a pointless routine on the first of the BGT semi-finals. Amanda 45, who had made an effort to look nice was overcom...
Read full storyKatie and Peter back together again
In the heady world of showbiz, nothing is static, especially a sentence like this. In a dramatic turn of events, it seems that Katie and Peter have cancelled their plans for their separation and are joining up again. Er. Hold on, no, it seems t...
Read full storyJonas Brothers Get Advice From Paul McCartney
After having some time alone for a couple of weeks, Joe Jonas had the idea to try to call up Sir Paul McCartney to see if they could to get a fresh look at the ideas they have been seriously considering, the number one being splitting up the group, a...
Read full storyKirstie Alley Fat Yet Again - From Eye-Candy to John Candy in two years!
The lovely Kirstie Alley has piled on the pounds and kilos and had to be crane lifted into the studio to chat to her pal Oprah. Ms Alley warned Oprah about the sins of over-eating. Which is a bit like Oliver Reed warning Richard Burton and George Bes...
Read full storyMelissa Rivers: The Tantrum The Celebrity Apprentice Cameras Didn't See
LAS VEGAS - Melissa Rivers, still steaming and fuming from being fired by Donald Trump told a reporter for The Las Vegas Light Beacon about some of the behind the scenes action that the Celebrity Apprentice cameras did not get. The "CA" castoff to...
Read full storyBGT's Jamie Pugh To Have Last Laugh In Pizzagate Affair
BGT's Jamie Pugh, appearing relaxed and happy spoke to us this morning about his sensational sacking from his part time job as a pizza delivery driver. Reports were circulating that Pugh had fallen into the pits of despair following the heartless mov...
Read full storyFear as Cockney Pandemic Sweeps UK
Large areas of East London remained cordoned-off today by the army and police. Elsewhere in the country, people from East London are being asked to make their way, silently, to rapidly constructed isolation centres. Medical experts and linguists...
Read full storyLeeds v. Millwall Could Be Decided By A Fight
West Yorkshire police have confirmed in a statement tonight, a cancellation of all staff leave in preparation for the second leg of the League One play-off between Leeds United and Millwall at Elland Road on Wednesday night, after it emerged that, if...
Read full storyRobert Downey, Jr. Admits He's American Idol's Danny Gokey
HOLLYWOOD - After Danny Gokey was eliminated from American Idol last week, he revealed to Ryan Seacrest that he is really Robert Downey, Jr. Downey told Seacrest that he has always wanted to be a singer. But he wanted to become a singer on his own...
Read full storyMan With World's Largest Man-Boobs Axed by TV Channel
HOUSTON, TX - The man with the world's largest man-boobs was given the axe today by a local Foxx affiliate, leaving many wanting answers. "Is somebody going to write a spoof story about it?" asked Sally Jenkins. "That's something I'd really like...
Read full storyEurovision : Noway's Alexander Rybak is in love with a fairytale - Rumplestilskin!
Alexander Rybak, 23 from Norway the winner of the Eurovision Song Contest 2009; who scored 600 points in the 'loosely' defined spectacle called a competition has revealed his love for sadistic fairytale midget Rumplestilskin. As a young boy in No...
Read full storyBritain's Got Talent - makes kids cry and is cruel to child contestants says watchdog
A children's watchdog charity has slammed 'Britain's Got Talent', due to the cruelty inflicted onto the younger contestants and Jamie Pugh - due to Amanda Holden. Valerie Doolittle said " I am becoming more and more distressed with seeing childre...
Read full storyArsenal Ladies No Match For United
At 1-0 down, it was always going to an enormous task for Arsenal to square things up in their Champions League semi-final second leg against Manchester United tonight, but fielding their women's team was never going to be enough, and so it proved.
Read full storyMiss California taking it from both ends on Internet images
VISTA, CA - With her pink-panty clad, topless image recently appearing on the Internet, it would appear reigning Miss California Carrie Prejean, 21, has her hands full, getting plowed in the media, really taking a pounding from every side. Miss Pr...
Read full storyNoddy Leaves Big Ears Following Gay Romp - Moves In With 7 Dwarfs
We're hearing that Noddy walked out on long time partner Big Ears last night following a blazing row over a party attended by the hitherto inseperable couple where it was alleged that Noddy disappeared with Postman Pat and Bob the Builder for a drug...
Read full storyLady Gaga - The Truth Behind The Costumes
She's renowned for wearing the most outrageous costumes in the business, but nobody ever really knew why. Until I had the bottle to reveal the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. She's got a face like a slapped arse! Lady Gaga, c...
Read full storyPeppa Pig slaughtered in latest swine flu measures
Children's cartoon character Peppa Pig and her entire family (Mummy Pig, Daddy Pig and brother George) have been slaughtered in the latest attempts by the UK government to prevent swine flu spreading. In a statement to the Commons, Gordon Brown sa...
Read full storyTwilight Three: The Eclipse May Include Sarah Boyle Songs
The latest rumor out of Hollywood and filtering into Vancouver, British Columbia where the Twilight movies were filmed, is that not only have several of the actors in the first two Twilight movies signed a contract to do a third, "The Eclipse", but t...
Read full storyPete's 'Button Mushroom' Penis - Latest
Most men wouldn't take too kindly to having their manhood referred to as a 'button mushroom' but this was the kind of public ritual humiliation Peter Andre has had to tolerate from estranged wife Katie Price following their publicity seeking break up...
Read full storyVanessa Hudgens & Brenda Song fighting physically over West Side Story & Twilight roles
Teen queens, Brenda Song and Vanessa Hudgens have been recently fighting physically over several film roles. The ''New York Times'' recently reported that Vanessa's lifelong ambition is to play the Marie, the female lead character in the West Side St...
Read full storyElton John's brother is jealous of Saudi Arabia
Elton John's brother made a statement on national television that he is jealous of Saudi Arabian men because they have four wives in their marriage. Elton John's brother nick named "Lonely Willy" said he has been a homosexual since the age of sev...
Read full storyArsene Wenger Faces Accusations of "Child" Abuse
Arsenal football coach Arsene Wenger is at the center of a controversy over child abuse. Though the police is yet to go into the matter, grave concerns by fans of the club have shifted public attention to it. Manchester United which routed the Ars...
Read full storyWoman With World's Most Edible Pussy Foils Attempted Cat Burglary
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - A local seamstress arrived home from work early today, scaring away someone who was trying to break into her home. She says the would be intruder was after her precious pussy. Him Go Daon, 35, says that ever since she got Xiao...
Read full storyBritains Got Talent - Susan Boyle is Liar and Cheat says Sid 'Supersonic' Little
Supersonic Sid made a startling outburst this morning, by branding Susan Boyle both a liar and cheat, as he believes she is his former comedy partner, Eddie Large. Sid who is a devout Christian demonstrated this by showing us a bible and singing...
Read full storyRush Limbaugh story has spoof writer considering retirement
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - It's been nearly 6 weeks since spoof writer cwthomson published the story "Rush Limbaugh Prefers World's Largest Penis to World's Largest Vagina" in The Garlic Press, and he says it's still one of his most read stories, every sing...
Read full storyBritney Spears Fan Jumps On Stage: Turns Out It's Lindsay Lohan!
LOS ANGELES - It turns out that the crazed fan who jumped on stage during Britney Spears' Los Angeles concert performance was none other than actress Lindsay Lohan. Lilo, who was disguised as a male told Los Angeles sheriff's deputies that ever si...
Read full storyParis Hilton invites Miley Cyrus to a celebrity sleep over
Following an evening out with Paris Hilton, Miley Cyrus was spotted braving the snow all bundled up as she left Paris Hilton's New York City apartment this afternoon after a celibrity sleep over. Dressed in casual garb, Miley did her best to go wi...
Read full storyBGT's Shaun Smith Assaulted By Crazy Man
He wowed everybody with his impeccable interpretation of classic soul song 'Ain't No Sunshine' and had the judges positively salivating, but for young rugby player Shaun Smith, it was the start of a nightmare. As the jubilant youngster returned to...
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