Professional writers demand equal ratings in TheSpoof.com

Funny story: Professional writers demand equal ratings in TheSpoof.com

Hundreds of millions of professional writers, that contribute to TheSpoof.com in their tea and cocaine breaks, today demanded higher ratings and better cheese sandwiches, for bothering to contribute to the almost-always now adolescent, Susan Boyle-ty...

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New religion of Spoofology created

Funny story: New religion of Spoofology created

Writer L. Yawn Nowbored, trapped in his office with his secretary Monika Blewinsky for ten minutes, decided today to alleviate his boredom by inventing a new religion, Spoofology. 'Here's how it works', the writer - now The High Leader Thingy of Z...

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Obama Names Alien to Head Space Agency

Funny story: Obama Names Alien to Head Space Agency

Houston,Texas-Saying the pool of Earth-bound candidates was puny, President Obama has decided to hire from outside the solar system in order to fill the position of Chief NASA Administrator. Desa Fourkatia, a Zeta Reticuli Grey, is expected to wi...

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Lost RAF files hold excruciatingly embarrassing Prince William data

Funny story: Lost RAF files hold excruciatingly embarrassing Prince William data

London - (Royal Arse Mess): Mind-bogglingly sordid details of Royal Air Force recruit Prince William's security vetting assessment resulots have been lost by the MoD. Wills scored positive on hidden criminal convictions, soaring drug dealer and c...

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London mayor's intelligent thought 'near-miss'

Funny story: London mayor's intelligent thought 'near-miss'

The Mayor of London, Boris Johnson, had what was described as a 'near-miss' with intelligent thought today, while cycling along Shaftesbury Avenue. The incident occurred when Mr Johnson was cycling without his bike, and intelligent thought nearly...

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Apocalypse Fears As Sun Rises In West

Funny story: Apocalypse Fears As Sun Rises In West

There was terror in a West Midlands town this morning, when a Dudley man woke to find that the sun, which habitually rises in the east, had, instead, risen apocalyptically in the west, sparking fears that the end of the world was about to take place.

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Susan Boil, the singer that can't sing

Funny story: Susan Boil, the singer that can't sing

Since singing was first invented, by a drunken Scotsman in Arbroath in the 1300s, it worked by human beings taking deep breaths, then using their voices to speak loudly in a way that is very pleasant to listen to. Until fellow Scotsperson Susan Boil...

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David Cameron's Expenses Claim

Funny story: David Cameron's Expenses Claim

David Cameron, future puppet master of the whole world has revealed his expenses to the world. In the 47 page document, it can be seen that David claimed for 3 new Boris Johnson's, a year's supply of hair gel, three Iced Gem lettuces, a packet of...

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American Idol's "Bikini Girl" and Kara DioGuardi Kiss and Make Up (Sort Of)

HOLLYWOOD - Katrina Darrell, better known as Bikini Girl was singing her heart out on Mariah Carey's song "Vision Of Love" on the season finale of American Idol when judge Kara DioGuardi walked out on stage behind her (and upstaged her). Bikini Gi...

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'The Claim' by Franz Kafka

Funny story: 'The Claim' by Franz Kafka

Josef K looked out of the window at his rainy street, and got ready for his work. He brushed his teeth, ate his hat, and put on his well-worn macintosh apple. Then he left his aunt's house, and walked to the bus stop. 'Come back, Josef!', his Aunt Tatiana shouted out to him, 'you've forgotten your umbrella!', but Josef didn't hear her. At his office he walked to his desk, walked back to the doo...

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IPL: Weapon of Mass destruction

Funny story: IPL: Weapon of Mass destruction

Some call them the new boss, some call them arrogant, and even some dare to be hater? What is it? Its the Bush of cricket. Mr. Modi and IPL has become the new world superpower in the world of cricket. Its almost like Bush invading Africa or South Afr...

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'A Study In Violin-Playing'

Funny story: 'A Study In Violin-Playing'

As Sherlock Holmes paced the floors of his house in Baker Street, he could see no light at the end of the tunnel in his latest case. Some wretched thief had stolen in in the night, and stolen his beloved Slazengari violin, and he was muttering angrily to himself about the theft, when his colleague Dr. Watson entered the room. 'Morning, Holmes', the doctor said, 'any news about your fiddle?' 'Th...

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Jade Goody Still Dead

Funny story: Jade Goody Still Dead

Jade Goody is still dead it has been revealed. Some fans were hoping for a resurrection in time for the summer bestsellers list but so far there have been no sightings. Her PR man Max Clifford said: "There is a big Goode shaped hole in all our he...

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Katie Price follows childhood dream to become a Nun

Funny story: Katie Price follows childhood dream to become a Nun

Glamour model Katie Price AKA Jordan, 32, has announced she is becoming a nun after her recent split with husband Peter Andre. Price, who was born a Catholic but has never practiced, has spent the last two weeks in negotiation with Bishop Tutu on...

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Clown dies prematurely while living

Funny story: Clown dies prematurely while living

A professional party clown died in London yesterday while performing a duet with an experienced midget, police said today. "Turbee" the Clown was performing the third act of Madam Suzette's "Reggie the Whimsical" when he suddenly collapsed from an...

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Ronaldo sues Carragher

Funny story: Ronaldo sues Carragher

Cristiano Ronaldo has sued Jamie Carragher for 42 million pounds because he touched his hair. He told me, "It's a disgrace, I had to sit and fix it for a whole hour." He was very upset when Jamie touched his hair, and it hurt so much that he...

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Catholic Church Pope agrees to 'bank off' Obama, Berlusconi and Blair in atonement for the World Merchant Banking abuse scandal live in Rome, Italy on You-Tube

Funny story: Catholic Church Pope agrees to 'bank off' Obama, Berlusconi and Blair in atonement for the World Merchant Banking abuse scandal live in Rome, Italy on You-Tube

Direct interview for the Vatican Voice by Dr. Giorgio Dini and his microphone assistant Roberta Cancedda, The Merchant Bankers of the Insituto Gianniana Gaslini Hosiptal, Genoa, Italy. The leader of the Roman Catholic Church in Italy has agreed to...

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Churches warn of political swing to the non-corrupt, ultra right BNP

Funny story: Churches warn of political swing to the non-corrupt, ultra right BNP

Worried straight/mostly gay religious leaders from all denominations have stressed their concerns about corrupt MP's from main line parties and the consequences of their actions. Church of England leader has outed his concerns and warned "very ben...

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Get A Bigger Penis or Die Trying

Funny story: Get A Bigger Penis or Die Trying

It is hardly a secret that most men in Britain today wish they had a willy the size of a blue whale. But sadly, only several men are blessed in this way. There are many benefits to having a large penis such as more sex, being served quicker in shops, having a bigger penis, more sex, making people in swimming pools gasp, having a bigger penis, being able to whip it out anywhere without shame, b...

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Secret of Eternal Life Found in Archbishops Beard

Funny story: Secret of Eternal Life Found in Archbishops Beard

Archbishop of Canterbury Rowan Williams was trying to halt rumours today that the secret of eternal life had been discovered nesting in his enormous wad of face fuzz by his local GP during a regular check up. "This allegation is ludicrous" he warb...

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Michael Jackson Cancels Tour Due To 'Meanness'

Michael Jackson today announced that he would definitely cancel his forthcoming tour unless everyone in Britain agreed to stop calling him mad. The 44 year old musician told press this afternoon that: "It hurts. It really does. Yes, I'm a little...

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'Western Medicine is a sham' says Acupuncture therapist

Funny story: 'Western Medicine is a sham' says Acupuncture therapist

Today leading Acupuncture therapist 'Dr' Tanya Brainstorm denounced the government for allowing 'un-spiritually tested' treatments such as medicine and surgery to be available on the NHS. "This is a terrible situation and really is a sign of the t...

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Danny Dyer's new documentary

Funny story: Danny Dyer's new documentary

Cockney hard-man and all round dangerous bloke to know, Danny Dyer has revealed his new Television project. The programme is called: 'Danny Dyer's A nice cup of Tea and a sit down'. It is currently filming, with many of the stunts being performed...

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Bitter - Amanda Holden buzzes belly dancer, Julia Naidenko due to 'bimbo rage!'

Funny story: Bitter - Amanda Holden buzzes belly dancer, Julia Naidenko due to 'bimbo rage!'

Resident totty and not much else Amanda Holden 45, buzzed the Latvian siren belly dancer as she gyrated and bumped her way through a pointless routine on the first of the BGT semi-finals. Amanda 45, who had made an effort to look nice was overcom...

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Space shuttle lands on the Moon

Funny story: Space shuttle lands on the Moon

The space shuttle has landed safely on the Moon, where it was diverted after stormy weather prevented it from landing in Florida. Officials had cancelled the planned landing at the Lewinsky Space Center, and rerouted it to the easier Moon one. 'It...

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MPs to be replaced by farmyard animals - Queen makes official announcement

Funny story: MPs to be replaced by farmyard animals - Queen makes official announcement

Whitehall - The Queen has announced that all MPs, including PM Gordon Brown, are to be made redundant in the next federal election and replaced with farmyard animals. The Queen has faced enormous pressure from the public recently, to get rid of the...

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Boyle hopping mad over elimination

Funny story: Boyle hopping mad over elimination

Scottish warbler, Susan Boyle, has been eliminated from Britain's Got Talent" and boy is she mad. Her subsequent stage performance was not up to standard and a shepherd's hook was used as a last desperate measure to remove her from the house lights.

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Bruce Springsteen admits he is afraid of the dark and has NEVER danced in it

Funny story: Bruce Springsteen admits he is afraid of the dark and has NEVER danced in it

Bruce Springsteen has admitted in an exclusive interview, 24 years after releasing his hit song "Dancing In The Dark" that he is actually afraid of the dark. Springsteen has long been hailed as one of the greatest singers of the 1980s, and one of...

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Obama Has Joint Chiefs Arrested For Religious Discrimination

Funny story: Obama Has Joint Chiefs Arrested For Religious Discrimination

United States Premiere Barack Obama, enraged at the actions of The Joint Chiefs of Staff of the Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines, and Coast Guard, had the group arrested on charges of religious discrimination after the annual Memorial Day concert on th...

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Britain's Got Talent, Show Has One Flaw Aside From That Ass, Cowell

Funny story: Britain's Got Talent, Show Has One Flaw Aside From That Ass, Cowell

Once again Susan Boyle wowed the audience to their feet went a great rendition of "Memories" from the Broadway musical Cats and everyone knew she had nailed it. The Scottish Virgin had struck again, and she deserved it! But there was also a moment...

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American Idol: Simon Cowell vs Kara DioGuardi (Bikini Stand-Off)

Forget Israel and the Palestinians, and pay no heed to the war in the Congo, there is a full-scale war going on behind the scenes and in front of the cameras on American Idol. This follows after Kara DioGuardi or 'the new judge' as everyone refers...

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Mi6 Left on train!

Funny story: Mi6 Left on train!

Great Britain was today sensationally left unguarded as Mi6 was apparently left on a train from Waterloo. Security Services, Police & PCSO Numpties from across the nation have been drafted in to find the elusive building which is usually left...

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Michael Jackson threatens to pull out of UK tour

Funny story: Michael Jackson threatens to pull out of UK tour

Michael Jackson has threatened to pull out of his proposed London shows in a row over boiled sweets. Although the promoters agreed to Jackson's demands over champagne, five star accommodation and caviar, they were not prepared to provide the star...

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Ant and Dec voted off Britain's Got Talent

Funny story: Ant and Dec voted off Britain's Got Talent

In a sensational programme last night, presenters Ant and Dec were voted off Britain's got talent in favour of an incontinent granny and a group of dancers performing in gimp masks. The red hot favourites for the show only polled 10% of the vote,...

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Amy Winehouse: The Breakdown

Pop superstar Amy Winehouse finally seems to have had it. She was seen outside one of Londons trendiest clubs attempting to make love to a fire-hydrant while smoking three cigars, and having the image of Madonna's 2nd African Foster child tatoo'd on...

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Alcohol: A must have

Traffic laws in Brittain are about to receive a major face-lift. Under continuous strain from the tax-paying public, the government has for a change, done some research before implementing a rule which no-one usually follows in any case. On a rec...

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Republicans cheer for Obama is going to be GONE in 2010

Funny story: Republicans cheer for Obama is going to be GONE in 2010

Today, former Republican VP Dick Chenney announced his candidacy for being a Vice-President again. The former VP was against Obama for the Guantanimo Bay closure and for his actions to the economy. Top 10 reasons Chenney is happy that Obama's going away: * Obama's bad ecconomic ideas * Biased - Brings more rights to blacks than whites * Horrible VP * Guatanimo Bay closure * Smiles TOO MU...

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Astronauts Going Stir Crazy

Funny story: Astronauts Going Stir Crazy

For the second day in a row the orbiting space shuttle has been unable to return to earth. Bad weather has prevented the descent both times. The added tension is beginning to show on the astronauts. Astronaut 1: Mission Control, this is really getting old. We've been in this fancified Warhol soup can for two weeks now. I would really like to get home now. I can't even stretch out here withou...

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Woman With World's Largest Vagina Suffering From World's Largest Yeast Infection

Funny story: Woman With World's Largest Vagina Suffering From World's Largest Yeast Infection

NEW YORK CITY, NY - The year's breakout Broadway sensation, the "World's Largest Vagina Monologues," has been indefinitely cancelled after its star was diagnosed with the world's biggest yeast infection. "I had noticed a slight burning, itching s...

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Jarrow Marchers Set Off For London Again

Funny story: Jarrow Marchers Set Off For London Again

Police on Tyneside were out in force last night, as a column of marchers set off from Jarrow to walk to FA headquarters in London to register a complaint on behalf of their beloved and beleaguered Newcastle United. The Magpies, it was, who were r...

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Susan Boyle Sings Her Way Into The "Britain's Got Talent" Semi-Finals

Funny story: Susan Boyle Sings Her Way Into The "Britain's Got Talent" Semi-Finals

LONDON - Susan Boyle, the 47-year-old singing sensation says she wants to win "Britain's Got Talent" grand prize of 100,000 pounds ($159,000 U.S.) so bad she can taste it. The Scottish lass in her latest performance sang "Memory" from the play Cat...

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"Dancing With The Stars" Helio Castroneves Wins The Indy 500

Funny story: "Dancing With The Stars" Helio Castroneves Wins The Indy 500

INDIANAPOLIS - Helio Castroneves, a native of Brazil, has won this year's Memorial Day Indianapolis 500 Auto Race. The Penske Racing Team member has now won the Super Bowl of auto racing a total of three times in 2001, 2002, and now 2009. Cast...

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Newspaper shows terrorists the best way to bomb Britain

Funny story: Newspaper shows terrorists the best way to bomb Britain

Britain's leading smut peddler The News Of The World (NOTW), yesterday continued to show the worlds terrorists the best places to bomb in Britain, as well as the easiest way to gain entry. Yesterday two of its reporters, posing as two Middle Eastern...

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Gov. Arnold "$$$" Schwarzenegger Welcomes Space Shuttle Atlantis

Funny story: Gov. Arnold "$$$" Schwarzenegger Welcomes Space Shuttle Atlantis

MALIBU BEACH, California - Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger gladly welcomed the seven-man crew of the space shuttle Atlantis as they landed at Ron Howard's private landing strip on Malibu Beach. The approach of Hurricane Zoquisha off the Florida coa...

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What is genital viral warts?

Funny story: What is genital viral warts?

According to Pakistan cricket board, the real culprit for the spread of genital warts has been found. They were able to traced it to one of their best fast bowler named "Rawalpindi Express." During an emergency test which they do all time to keep...

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Missing link: India to Host Strategic Confab

Funny story: Missing link: India to Host Strategic Confab

A confab to streamline the search for the missing link and set criteria for the search has been convened by the leading evolutionary scientists in the world and will hold in the Indian city of New Delhi. The scientists are concerned that they do...

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Obama to step down in 2010

Funny story: Obama to step down in 2010

Today, Communist leader Barack Obama announced that he'll be quiting as US President on January 20, 2010 (one year after he became president). The media says he will quit due to failing plans (Guantanamo Bay closure, 2010 withdrawal, etc.). Quest...

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