President Obama Catching Hell For Winning $358,000 on The All-Star Game
WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Barack Obama has been severely criticized for betting on the American League in Major League Baseball's 2009 All-Star Game. The president, who is a lifelong Chicago White Sox fan won a total of $358,000 by betting on t...
Read full storySotomayor Quotes Ozzy Osbourne at Confirmation Hearing
WASHINGTON, D.C. - The pungent aroma of Sotomayor asada filled the air Wednesday at the Capitol Building as prominent Republicans turned up the heat on Supreme Court nominee Sonia Sotomayor, who was sweating profusely by midday under their incessant...
Read full storyVideo Released Of Michael Jackson's Pepsi Ad Accident Prompts 02 Arena Copycat Event
London, UK - With the release of video of Michael Jackson's hair catching fire during a 1984 Pepsi commercial, several hundred fans have gathered at London's O2 arena to participate in a vigil and light each other's hair on fire. Said one particip...
Read full storyBNP changes name following Euro Parliament performance
Following the snubbing received from fellow members of the European Parliament at the opening of the new term of the European Gravy Train, newly-elected MEP and head of the BNP, Ron Nasty, has decided to rename his party. Mr Nasty has instructed a...
Read full storyAdam Lambert To Star With Lisa Marie Presley In "The Thrilling Story of Michael Jackson"
HOLLYWOOD - Rolling Stone Magazine has just confirmed that American Idol's Adam Lambert and Elvis Presley's Lisa Marie Presley have signed on to make a motion picture tribute to Michael Jackson titled, The Thrilling Singing and Dancing Story of Micha...
Read full storyDeborah Rowe on whoremoan replacement therapy
Los Angeles - (Homopathetic Ass Mess): OctoMom's former snatch doctor has prescribed Debbie Rowe the same oral remedy that's stimulated c(o)untless fecund Hollywood uteruses like Angelia Jolie's and Katie Holmes'. Rowe is anxious to revive her sag...
Read full storyJanet Jackson's Boobs Finally Get Lawsuit Settled
I guess it was due after Michael Jackson's death and all the freaky things going on with the Jackson family that one thing has certainly came out right, if you'll excuse the pun. A four year lawsuit has been declared dismissed after Janet Jackson'...
Read full storySexy, nudist Tour de France follows Lance and Co!
Nudists, FKK, Gay Rights, Lesbians and other sexually driven groups including S & M ers and latex fetishers have collaborated and successfully launched the 2009 "Nudist Tour De Sex in France." They are following the same route as the real Tour...
Read full storySquirrel Attacks Limey In Madison Square Park
Limey dickhead, Skoob 1999, a sometime contributor to world renowned satirical website TheSpoof.com has revealed that Americans are basically a big bunch of robbing thieving bastards. Especially the squirrels. Whingeing bastard Spoof pretender...
Read full storyNorth Korea Secretly Planning To Invade Tennessee
CHATTANOOGA, Tennessee - The Tennessee Office of Tourism has intercepted an email sent to a Wi Poo Fung, owner of Wi Poo Fung's Cleaners in downtown Chattanooga, "We No Clean It Too Good - You No Pay, Okey Dokey Hokey Pokey?" The email states that...
Read full storyJoe Jackson to take Jacko's Kids on the Road: "The Jackson 4 - 1MJ = 3 + ME Tour de Force U"?
Las Vegas, Nevada - "It will be the children's first Tour de Force," said Joe Jackson, as he prepared his luggage for the flight back to Los Angeles. "But I assure you it won't be their last Tour de Force, if I got anything to do with it." Mr. Jac...
Read full storyTatiana Del Toro Wants To Date Kevin Skinner
LOS ANGELES - UPI has just announced that American Idol reject Tatiana Del Toro wants to go out on a date with America's Got Talent contestant Kevin Skinner. Del Toro supposedly told her hair stylist, Slicky Pomade of Pomona, that she is tired of...
Read full storyWorlds Most Perfect penis Attached To Worlds Ugliest, Smelliest Man
The World Penis Festival ended toady with the winner of the prized 'Golden Shaft' being won by an ugly, fucking bastard. Markus Lowtonicus, from number 21 Sycamore Grove, Lancashire is regarded as a pig-ugly, minger of a man but that didn't stop h...
Read full storyMan Gets Divorced From Reality
Local man Tim Traveller has formally announced that he has become divorced from reality. Tim, from Stoke on Trent, said he had sought an annulment from this World after repeated attempts to fit in failed. "I'm just not cut out for this sort of th...
Read full storyWingless Airplanes Not Such a Good Idea After All
It was hailed as a revolution in aviation, but the wingless airplane has yet to get off the ground. Literally. Boffins at the Aeronautical Institute for the Retarded (A.I.R) proposed the idea several months ago during the dawn of the economic cris...
Read full storyLittle Boy Blue Come Blow Your Horn!
Local farming representatives have called on Little Boy Blue to come blue his horn after several people have discovered cows in the corn. "We are calling upon the young lad to use his powers to make this terrible travesty stop", said one man, "onl...
Read full storyLocal Elderly Spinster Sisters Put Out For Visiting Dignitary Bruce Forsyth
Local 96-year old twin sisters Rosemary and Valerie Browne shared a night of unbridled hot, steamy passion with visiting celebrity television presenter Bruce Forsyth. The twins were overcome with sexual longing upon meeting the legendary big-chinn...
Read full storyCrystal Defanti De-Flowers Carrie Prejean in CA Boutique
SACRAMENTO, CA - Things took an unexpected turn for the better today at Sugar's Shack boutique in Sacramento, California when ousted Miss California Carrie Prejean and reigning Isabelle Jackson Elementary school Porn Queen Crystal Defanti apparently...
Read full storyJon Gosselin Ready For New Life, New Girlfriend
Jon and Kate Plus 8 father Jon Gosselin may be without the Kate, but the missing father of sextupletes and twins is eagerly, perhaps greedily moving forward in his life "without all that baggage" PLUS his new life and girlfriend. After all, he's h...
Read full story660 - Spoof Writer Half A Dozen Away From Something Really Bad
Just in: (That's what they call a chap with a one-inch penis around here, Justin) Spoof contributor Skoob1999, who by his own admission is absolutely rubbish, has been observed amid a sea of cigarette ash and crumpled beer cans contemplating story...
Read full storyMary Poppins Wanted For Drug Dealing.
Police have confirmed that an arrest warrant has been issued for one 'Mary Poppins' in relation to the dealing of illegal, nonprescription drugs to minors. "We've been after her for a while", stated Officer C.O. Rupt, head of operation Spit Spot.
Read full storyRobert Redford Weds Vagina Painting Artist Sibylle Szaggars
Hamburg, Germany - Actor, environmental activist and ski resort developer, Robert Redford, 71, has married his longtime girlfriend, Sibylle Szaggars, 51, in a private ceremony at the St. Catherine Church in Hamburg, Germany. Although the actor's...
Read full storyKing of Pop now King of PRoNK
PYONGYANG, Wed. In developing news, astonishing rumours are amok that Kim Jong Il, ailing President of the People's Republic of North Korea, is to be replaced by none other than the hitherto dead pop personality, Michael Jackson. A reliable sourc...
Read full storyDoes Susan Boyle Have Michael Jackson's Brain?
Last night the stage saw a new Susan Boyle. Gone was the lady who has been hiding in motel rooms and missing her place on the traveling group of singers from "Britain's Got Talent". Beginning with a slow beautiful rendition of "Memory" from cats,...
Read full storySolar powered car
A Solar Powered car has been invented in the USA. The inventor however Carl Carson has disappeared fearing for his life.A neighbour John McCarthy claims that Mr Carson has had threatening letters phone calls and emails all because he has invented som...
Read full storyFlintoff: Cricket Hurting My Drinking
Andrew 'Freddie' Flintoff, 31, has announced his retirement from Test cricket in order to spend more time with his ale. After an injury-plagued career, the talismanic all-rounder will now confine himself to games lasting less than two hours. "I...
Read full storyJon of Jon and Kate Plus 8 Turning Into A Playboy
PITTSBURGH - Jon Gosselin of the reality show Jon and Kate Plus 8 has really turned into a first-class playboy since he filed for divorce from his wife Kate two weeks ago. The Korean father of sextuplets and two older children was first linked to...
Read full storyHackers ruin iPhone App 'purity ring' with Stones' 'Let's Spend The Night Together' ringtone
London - (Abstinence Mess): Cyber hackers have made Apple's iPhone and iPod Touch into obsolete junk by hacking into operations mainframes controlling a new purity ring iPhone App. This has resulted in customers' purity pledge cyber application...
Read full story"SpongeBob SquarePants" finally comes out of the "Closet"?
Hollywood, California - After spending hours reorganizing his closet, SpongeBob SquarePants finally came out, taking a break for a moment, only to find his friends had prepared a surprise birthday party celebration for him down stairs. "With all...
Read full storyCongress Designates July 22 as National Chicken Day
Washington DC: Congress has recognized July 22 as National Chicken Day, as the USA and every other culture in the world have relied on the chicken for sustenance. Yet this bird is always the butt of fowl jokes. Colonel Sanders is to host the festi...
Read full storyJackson's 'Sharia Law' will found in Bahrain
Manama, Bahrain - (Offshore Banking Mess): Suspicions that Michael Jackson may have converted to Islam shortly before his death intensified today after an 'Islamic' last will and testament was discovered in Manama that disinherits the singer's childr...
Read full storyLondon 2012 Olympics Doomed
The Olympic Games scheduled for London on July 2012 will not take place according to scientist Ann Unaki. At a press conference in London she explained that NASA has discovered a large mass a planet the size of Jupiter heading our way it is plane...
Read full storyTop 15 Low-Cost Rivals Of Two-Buck Chuck
After a cheap wine named "Two-Buck Chuck" was entered into a national wine-tasting by the "Master Tasters" secretly and won first prize, other imitators are out there: Top 15 Low-Cost Rivals Of Two-Buck Chuck 15. Chateau De Composto 14. I Can't Believe It's Not Two-Buck Chuck 13. Bigfoot's Organic 13. Jean-Paul Jones Goodo Moutain Dew 12. Old Club Foot 11. Blue Nose-Veined Nun...
Read full storyFerguson opens lid on this summers bizarre transfer policy!
In a world exclusive, The Spoof today got an inside view, courtesy of Sir Alex Ferguson, into Manchester United's somewhat baffling summer transfer policy of selling top players and buying 'fodder'. After chewing frantically through a years supply of...
Read full storyFlintoff retires from Test Cricket
Today has seen the much expected announcement that Andrew (Freddy) Flintoff will be retiring from Test Cricket following this summers ashes series. Flintoff has announced that his decision follows a series of injuries that have told his body it i...
Read full storyBullshit Machine Continues to Run Unabated
Anywhere USA: Diogenes searched for an honest man with his lantern. This reporter, possessing a large strobe lamp, set out to shine the light on various people and say "enough political BULLSHIT, please turn off the machine." President Obama: "The unemployment rate should not exceed 8%, especially when the stimulus package gets up to speed and creates jobs." Au contraire, Mr. President methinks...
Read full storyGod loses court case
Michael Roberts of Glasgow raised a Legal Action in the Scottish Courts against GOD for financial compensation for giving him such a shit life. Michael explained that as a young boy he was taken to church every Sunday and for years he was told st...
Read full storyPresident Obama's Pitch Sails Into The Stands And Hits Dick Cheney
ST. LOUIS - St. Louis Cardinals superstar Albert Pujols told the president of the United States not to quit his day job after the president threw out Major League Baseball's All-Star game's ceremonial first pitch. President Obama trotted out to th...
Read full storyStacy Keibler Body Slams George Hamilton
HOLLYWOOD - Former WWF, WCW, and WWE wrestler Stacy Keibler has admitted that she did indeed body slam actor George Hamilton in a Malibu Beach Starbucks. The 29-year-old Keibler, nicknamed "The Legs" said that she just finally got sick and tired o...
Read full storyTainted Jackson Drug Recall Hits Hollywood
HOLLYWOOD, CA - Two "tainted lots" of a generic version of propofol, a powerful sedative and anesthetic used by pop icon Michael Jackson before his death, have been recalled by the drug maker. The Los Angeles Times indicated police found the drug...
Read full storyFather Wayne Rooney? What's All That About?
In a desperate bid to plumb new depths the great British redtops have announced that, had he not become a professional footballer, Manchester United ace Wayne Rooney would have become a priest! It seems that Rooney was more interested in Religeous...
Read full storyCity Sign Judas Iscariot - What Next?
It was revealed yesterday that Manchester City have finally signed Argentinian striker Judas Iscariot. Iscariot, who runs about a lot huffing and puffing, was said to be delighted by his move down the road. United fan, Mental Mickey, speaking f...
Read full storyPattaya Man Calls US Man A 'Sex Pest' And 'Paedo'
A British man living here in the Eastern seaboard town of Pattaya has astounded locals and tourists alike by referring to a visiting American tourist as a Sex Pest and a Paedo (paedophile). The incident happened as Moys Kenwood, 46 from Hull, was...
Read full storyDaft Bastard Survives 12 Days In Australian Outback
A daft bastard from Luton, 19 year old Harry Kuntz was found by a police search and rescue team after spending 12 days lost in the outback. Kuntz, a fudge factory worker went off for a stroll and inexplicably lost his bearings. Having left his cel...
Read full storySex In The City Does Go On Bishop Admits
Bishop Podraig O'Malley of Birmingham today admitted that people in the city are having sex most of the time. Speaking from a desk at Aston University, he told us: "When you do that Google Earth thing, you can see all the streets, and the building...
Read full storyPorn Prince Knocks One Out of the Park
SAN FRANCISCO, CA - It only took James Mitchell about three seconds to get to third base with his daughter's mother Danielle Keller, and another three minutes to score; it also took him about three minutes to beat her to death with a baseball bat, sa...
Read full storyO.J. Gets Work Release
The Nevada Department of Corrections and the National Football League have worked out a work release program for former Buffalo Bills Super Star and convicted felon O.J. Simpson. In the deal Simpson will be allowed to leave his maximum security pr...
Read full storySotomayor "Picks Up the Pace" at Confirmation Hearing Dinner Party
WASHINGTON, D.C. - Supreme Court nominee Sonia Sotomayor delivered a 7-minute speech aimed primarily at Senate Republicans at a dinner party following Monday's confirmation hearings, declaring that "authenticity to her roots" is at the heart of her c...
Read full storyPet Fish Ruins Sunday Afternoon Assaulting Owner
What began as a cool prize won 3 years ago at the county fair has ended in bloodshed this past Sunday as Little Woowoo was violently bludgeoned to death in self defense by his once proud owner. "Yeah, I was like 7 years old when I won that fish,"...
Read full storyObama Not US Citizen
Washington, DC - President Obama resigned today, responding to allegations that he is not actually a United States Citizen. He gave his resignation speech in front of thousands at The Mall. "You figured me out. You know, what amazed me was that...
Read full storyNikola Tesla Death Ray To Replace American Military - President Obama
Los Angeles, CA - In a stunning announcement, on the anniversary of inventor Nikola Tesla's birth, President Barack Obama has suggested he will scrap the american military establishment in favour of going ahead with the Nikola Tesla Death Ray. The Wh...
Read full storyPrince William To Join A Commune In Malibu
Malibu - Initial reports that Prince William Arthur Philip Louis, son of Prince Charles, Prince of Wales and the late Lady Diana, Princess of Wales, second in line to the British throne, is house hunting in the fashionable California coastal town of...
Read full storyMichael Jackson's Ghost Smacks Obama's Teleprompter
Washington, DC - Michael Jackson's ghost took a whack at Obama and ended up hitting his teleprompter. This is the claim of unauthorized biographer, Ian Heparin, who today released a book detailing Jackson's sordid past. Mr. Heparin claims that a lot...
Read full storyPissants Observed Working Asses Off -- For What?
That's the question a group of scientists are asking after observing a particular colony of ants "working their little asses off" day after day just outside their offices next to the main sidewalk. Dr. Jeff Dunkirk, lead entomologist in the new st...
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