Written by Skoob1999

Wednesday, 15 July 2009

image for 660 - Spoof Writer Half A Dozen Away From Something Really Bad
Skoob, I Am Your Writer Profile Avatar. You Are Shit, Says Red Devil.

Just in: (That's what they call a chap with a one-inch penis around here, Justin)

Spoof contributor Skoob1999, who by his own admission is absolutely rubbish, has been observed amid a sea of cigarette ash and crumpled beer cans contemplating story number 666 - the mark of the beast.

Now only six Spoof stories away from the landmark figure, the reclusive nutcase has been siezed by paranoia.

Rumour has it that Skoob has been strapped to a bed after projectile vomiting the equivalent of seven tins of mushy peas, stabbing himself in the arse with a crucifix, and screaming for some Holland's pies. In a deep, dark satanic style Mercedes De Cambridge basso profundo voice.

Exorcist, Max Von Snidebastard has told the stricken author in no uncertain terms to:

"Get the fuck out of here! Vile demon!"

At which point, the stricken Spoofer levitated up off the bed into the frosty air, and quipped:

"Your mother sucks cocks in hell Von Snidebastard!"

Which leads to speculation as to whether or not writing a 666th Spoof news article can be construed as being hazardous to health.

We asked Satan to comment but he just laughed. A bit like Vincent Price probably would have, had he still been alive.

The subject of Spoof writers and demonic possession is due to be addressed in the House Of Common Expense Fiddling Bastards tomorrow.

Jimmy Savile was unavailable for comment as he was hiding from a renegade branch of Spoof reporters who have vowed to kick his fucking head in following a series of Jim'll Fix It let downs. The ice cream stealing bastard.

More as we get it.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!





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