Written by Abel Rodriguez

Wednesday, 15 July 2009

image for Stacy Keibler Body Slams George Hamilton
Stacy Keibler wearing a dark wig and putting on a pole dancing seminar in Walla Walla, Washington.

HOLLYWOOD - Former WWF, WCW, and WWE wrestler Stacy Keibler has admitted that she did indeed body slam actor George Hamilton in a Malibu Beach Starbucks.

The 29-year-old Keibler, nicknamed "The Legs" said that she just finally got sick and tired of Hamilton's incessant flirting, persistent touching, perpetual grabbing, and unrelenting groping.

Keibler said that when she and Hamilton were on Dancing With The Stars Hamilton was always winking at her, trying to stick his tongue down her throat, and touching her nipples with his middle fingers.

She said that she told him to stop on several occasions. Keibler said that after about the twelfth time it really got old and she reported him to DWTS co-host Tom Bergeron.

Keibler said that Bergeron just laughed it off by saying that it was just George being George. She then reported Hamilton to British judge Len Goodman who is close to 91-years-old.

Licentious Len just said that she was probably just imagining it all seeing as how she kind of had that tart-look about her.

Her only hope was Italian judge Bruno Tonioli who when he was told that Hamilton was touching her nipples simply replied, "My dear Stacy, trust me on this one kid.

There are millions of red-blooded American males who would give their golf clubs, their fishing rods, and their bowling balls to be able to touch your two luscious, nubile, and provocatively pert beyond belief nipples.

So girlfriend, be grateful that you are not like Cloris Leachman who could not even pay a guy to have her 82-year-old nipplets (nipples) touched."

Tonioli laughed and said that he wanted to confess to her in the strictest confidence that Leachman had in fact offered him $400 if he would touch both her breasts.

Bruno replied that he would be willing to touch one for $300. Leachman thought about it for a few moments and then asked him if he would take a personal check.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: George Hamilton is resting comfortably at The Medicine Man Native-American Indian Hospital in Santa Monica .]

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!





Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!

Go to top
45 readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more