England Recall Geoff Boycott

Funny story: England Recall Geoff Boycott

Fresh from the England team's embarrassing humiliation by the West Indies on Saturday, the England cricket selectors have acted swiftly to supress criticism, and have recalled ancient treasure, Sir Geoffrey Boycott to the team for the Second Test mat...

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Southgate goes as well

Funny story: Southgate goes as well

Gareth Southgate, the Middlesborough manager, has been sacked with immediate effect. The news, announced late tonight, means that three Premiership managers have had the chop in the last 24 hours. Chelsea boss Phil Scolari was the biggest casualty...

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Travel in your area

Trains have slight delays in both directions, the roads are looking good except townbound where roadworks are causing holdups. There are no delays on tube lines (where appropriate) and buses running normally. All flights on time. More in half an hour. And now, Victor Lewis-Smith presents the comedy show "Colostomy bag and matching shoes" with subtitles.

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Unions Named In Lawsuit

Funny story: Unions Named In Lawsuit

Representatives of Felipe Calderon's government have filed suit in US federal court today, naming the United States' Labor Unions as defendants. According to papers filed, the Mexican government is charging the Labor Unions conspired to create the c...

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U.S. bank bailout to rely on Monopoly money, armed guards, assault weapons

Funny story: U.S. bank bailout to rely on Monopoly money, armed guards, assault weapons

Wall Street produced the global financial and economic crisis but it may take a beloved 75-year-old game to solve it. The Obama administration is preparing a revised bailout plan for the banking system, calling on Wall Street bankers and 'Fat Cat...

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Pigeon Obesity reaches an all time high!

Funny story: Pigeon Obesity reaches an all time high!

In 2001 approximately 0.5% of all common pigeons where obese, in 2009 the results show that 23.5% of pigeons are obese. Last week top naturist, David Attenborough visited the city of Bristol to investigate it's rarest artefacts of nature. He visit...

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Wrong bush burning admits god

Funny story: Wrong bush burning admits god

Could a simple miscommunication have led to the most severe bush fires in Australian history? With the death toll of hundreds rising rapidly it seemed that god had chosen to forsake the people of Australia, for what is still unclear. That is unti...

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Big Brother Winner Brian Dowling Come out Trumps in Charity episode of 'Egg Heads'

Funny story: Big Brother Winner Brian Dowling Come out Trumps in Charity episode of 'Egg Heads'

If you remember, in 2007 Brian Dowling, aged 22 scooped the title of Big Brother Champion. Girls wanted date him, Men wanted to be him, but all this didn't stop the hard press that surrounded him. Headlines such as: "Blair: I am cringing as the coun...

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UN: It's OK To Be Anti-Semitic... But Not Anti-Zionist

After many months of debate the UN has finally announced that it is acceptable to be openly antisemitic, but at the cost of being openly anti-Zionist. A poll showed the majority of voters were in favour of sacrificing the ability to insult Israel...

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An Australian Genesis

Funny story: An Australian Genesis

In the beginning God created day and night. He created day for footy matches, going to the beach and BBQ's. He created night for going fishing, sleeping, and BBQ's, and God saw that it was good. On the Second Day, God created water for surfing, swimming and BBQ's on the beach, and God saw that it was good. On the Third Day God created the Earth to bring forth plants to provide malt and yeast...

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Writing's on the Wall For Poo-etry Corner

Funny story: Writing's on the Wall For Poo-etry Corner

A West London poet today unveiled his latest anthology, written entirely on the wall in a public lavatory in Ealing. Ed Ponse, a little known author, claimed to have been inspired to write the prose after a particularly lengthy visit to the loo l...

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Clockwork powered smart car announced

At a time when the majority of car manufacturers are trying to work out how to shift the daily-growing stockpile of unsold cars as recession bites deeper leaving them to resort to crazy tactics in order to get rid of them such as cereal box token-col...

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Sarah Palin's Vagina Diagnosed with Down Syndrome

Funny story: Sarah Palin's Vagina Diagnosed with Down Syndrome

Alaska Governor Sarah Palin's Press Secretary Meghan Stapleton has issued a press release which comes close to explaining the former Vice Presidential candidate's often puzzling comments and behavior. It seems Palin's vagina has been diagnosed wit...

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Trafalgar Square Flashmob Fails

Funny story: Trafalgar Square Flashmob Fails

A planned London Facebook FlashMob has failed. FlashMobs are where thousands of people spontaneously gather at a specific venue at a particular time after getting the details from their friends on a social networking site. The details are passe...

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God coming back to Earth

Funny story: God coming back to Earth

In a startling revelation, 10 Downing Street has issued a statement that God is coming back to Earth on 3rd March this year. It has been reported that the British PM Gordon Brown received a fax regarding this development from God's Minister of Fa...

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More Weather Warnings for the UK

Funny story: More Weather Warnings for the UK

Britain's weather continues to surprise and shock, with the Met Office tonight issuing further Severe Biblical Plague Warnings across the UK. Hard on the heels of the recent unprecedented blizzards and today's heavy rain, which has itself caused a...

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Political Poetry for Purging Pestering Pundit Pus

Funny story: Political Poetry for Purging Pestering Pundit Pus

A collection of political poetry, useful for purging pestering pundit pus. CEOs The CEO's in money are swimmin' and bonuses are all the time winnin'. They drive their companies to the ground, then in order for them to rebound they ask for a hand out with a scheme that's well planned out and all the way to the bank they are grinnin'. Palin Poesy They called up the lass that was...

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Spoof Writer Goes Mad - Writes Gibberish

Funny story: Spoof Writer Goes Mad - Writes Gibberish

A brilliant writer for the Internet humour website TheSpoof.com has gone mad, his insane rantings going unnoticed amidst the many faux-news articles on the site. "It took us a while to realize that he'd lost a nut. Actually, he was funnier that...

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Oil Companies Abolish Countries - Set Up Own Dictatorships

Funny story: Oil Companies Abolish Countries - Set Up Own Dictatorships

Oil companies today in a bold and unexpected move gave up trying to hide just how much power and influence they truly had and abolished the countries where their oil wells were. Within a matter of hours they set up new totalitarian principalities tha...

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Many Chinese Living In Caves

Funny story: Many Chinese Living In Caves

Over twenty million Chinese have their residences in caves, but that is often not a bad deal, according to a December McClatchy Newspapers dispatch from Miaogou Village. In addition to the obvious advantages (no mortgages), some caves have been i...

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Pitt And Jolie To Marry February 30th

Funny story: Pitt And Jolie To Marry February 30th

Hollywood CA -- The date's been set and the cake's been ordered! Angie Pitt and Brad Jolie plan to tie the knot on February 30th! Brad finally popped the question after Angie squirted out their latest whelp. Everyone in Hollywood will be there. P...

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The Man For Today - Mustapha Kamir

Funny story: The Man For Today - Mustapha Kamir

Who is Mustapha Kamir? That's the word on the lips of the world today, as Mr Kamir begins his new task - bringing peace to the Middle East. Although living in Cairo until today's shock appointment to the Obama Administration, Mustapha is actually...

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Ecstacy v Horse Riding

Funny story: Ecstacy v Horse Riding

Doctor Trevalian Numptee, chairman of the Advisory Board for the Classification of Drugs (ABCD), attempted to prove his point today concerning his suggestion that taking the drug ecstasy is no more dangerous than riding a horse. He rode an eighteen-...

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Fiji vs Fuji war of words escalates

Funny story: Fiji vs Fuji war of words escalates

Things reached boiling point in the continuing war of words between two of the world's leading microelectronics companies yesterday. Japan's giant Fuji Electronics Corporation have issued a writ against Fiji Microelectronics Corporation for "delib...

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Kinnear in frame for Chelsea job

Newcastle manager Joe Kinnear is on the Chelsea wish list to replace Luiz Felipe Scolari. Sky News reports the Newcastle manager's recent hospitalisation has been a cloak so he could start negotiations with Stamford Bridge. A Chelsea spokesman...

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Women assualts man after badly told joke

A women assaulted a man in a pub after she over heard him telling a sexist joke to his surrounding friends in London pub. Florence Woodhall (age 39) leaped across the table of My Fathers Moustache, a small pub in Camden London, punching Steven Dow...

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WWF Issues New Endangered Species Appeal

The Worldwide Fund for Nature has started a new appeal on behalf of a species it says has now been recognised as among the world's most endangered. The Greater-Mouthed Premiership Manager, or Managerium Footballaris, is now so under pressure that...

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How loving can a son be?

Funny story: How loving can a son be?

Dear Dad, Univer$ity life I$ really great and I'm beginning to enjoy it. Even though I'm making lot$ of new friend$, I $till find time to $tudy very hard. I already have $ome $tuff and I $imply can't think of anything el$e I need, $o if you like, you can ju$t $end me a $imple card a$ I would love to hear from you. Love, Your $on Morri$ His father replies: - Dear Morris, I kNOw th...

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Is this the unluckiest man in the world?

Funny story: Is this the unluckiest man in the world?

Is Mustapha Kamir of 23 Pyramid Terrace, Cairo the unluckiest man in the world? On the weekend, ex-Prime Minister Tony Blair postponed his ascendancy to Pontiff, electing instead to aid Gordon "one-eyed Scottish idiot" Brown and Barack Obama in th...

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Woman complains there's nothing on her TV

Funny story: Woman complains there's nothing on her TV

A woman from Arbroath, Mrs Betty McStupid, has today complained to the BBC's Watchdog programme that there's nothing on her TV. In a tersely written letter to the shows presenters, one of whom she thinks is a long-legged sexpot and the other a ple...

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Israeli-Palestinian Politics . . . explained

Funny story: Israeli-Palestinian Politics . . . explained

Here is all you need to know about Israeli-Palestinian politics: What happens when a fly falls into a coffee cup? An Italian - throws the cup, breaks it, and walks away in a fit of rage. A German - carefully washes the copy, sterilizes it and makes a new cup of coffee. A Frenchman - takes out the fly, and drinks the coffee. A Chinese - eats the fly and throws away the coffee. A R...

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Spamcycling

Funny story: Spamcycling

For years we've just thrown it away. But have you ever stopped to think what harm discarded Spam emails could be doing to the environment? Well a new initiative by the government has decided to address the problem. They claim that with 95% of e-...

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Friday the 13th: noxious comet on collision course with toxic ghost ship scrapyard

Funny story: Friday the 13th: noxious comet on collision course with toxic ghost ship scrapyard

London - (X-Files Mess): A highly noxious comet replete with Zyklon-B isotopes is on a Friday 13th February collision course with the UK shipping scrapyard charged with scuttling the toxic French aircraft carrier Le Clemenceau. Comet Lulin had be...

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Pentagon's Hummer Laser Gun 'targetting Mexican dope planes'

Funny story: Pentagon's Hummer Laser Gun 'targetting Mexican dope planes'

Tuscon, Arizona - (Sinsemilla Mess): The Pentagon has unveiled its latest high tech weapon against pesky Mexican dope fiends currently flooding California with psycho-grade Acapulco Gold cannabis strains. Giant Hummer-mounted laser guns capable of...

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Top DEMS Battle for Title of Who's The Scariest!

Funny story: Top DEMS Battle for Title of Who's The Scariest!

Washington,DC/ Pessimistic News - An epic battle is shaping up as the Democrats two top Demagogues battle it out for top billing in the Nation's Horror Show under the guise of "fresh new leadership and the promise of HOPE & CHANGE." Nobel peac...

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Deca-Mom Unveils Plan to Care for Children

Funny story: Deca-Mom Unveils Plan to Care for Children

Questioning her motives on the recent father-less births of ten children to accompany the previous breeding of octuplets, the world press descended on Nancy Stoopidly to ask some questions in basic math. Before turning to answer the hard questions...

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Plant, Krauss, Martin, Bush Winners At Grammys, Brown Biggest Loser

Funny story: Plant, Krauss, Martin, Bush Winners At Grammys, Brown Biggest Loser

Robert Plant and Alison Krauss' were the big winners at last night's Grammys as Chris Brown appeared to be the biggest loser. The unorthodox partnership of Plant & Krauss yielded rich rewards on the special night, as the pair nabbed five award...

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Dubai Going Broke! Proves There is Only One God, and It Ain't Allah!

Funny story: Dubai Going Broke! Proves There is Only One God, and It Ain't Allah!

Dubai/UAE Raggedy Ass Arab News - Despite claims to the contrary, Allah is not smiling on his children in Dubai. In addition to the recent revelation that the former playground of the rich and famous had turned into a running sewer with infidel s...

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Interactive Toys Selling Best

Funny story: Interactive Toys Selling Best

Among the best-selling and most controversial toys of this past holiday season were the $39.95 "Gotta Go" Doll, the $59.95 Baby Alive and the Lead-painted recalled "Dogs & Trees" all three because of their interactive features, especially their d...

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Technological breakthrough - Thanks to Fiji

Funny story: Technological breakthrough - Thanks to Fiji

The recent world-wide spate of throwing ones shoe at a politician has worried security personnel from the halls of Whitehall to Tianeman Square and Capitol Hill. Whether protesting about the current state of affairs in Iraq, Tibet or Gaza, bunging...

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Tony Adams Admits He Wasn't A Very Good Manager

Funny story: Tony Adams Admits He Wasn't A Very Good Manager

Sacked Portsmouth manager Tony Adams has admitted in an interview that he knew he wasn't a very good manager, but feels he was left with little choice when former boss Harry Redknapp jumped ship to go to Tottenham Hotspur. Adams, 40, was speaking...

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Fulham Shock - AJ's True Identity Revealed

Funny story: Fulham Shock - AJ's True Identity Revealed

Club officials at the Cottage were reeling today as the revelations about their striker Andy Johnson were sinking in. With the Film Awards ceremony season upon us, it was a member form the L.A. Galaxy press office who had inadvertently spilled the be...

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Education News Issue 1 Volume 1: 21st December 2012 - Chinese school kids have had a reprieve

Funny story: Education News Issue 1 Volume 1: 21st December 2012 - Chinese school kids have had a reprieve

Instead of slaving in the classrooms from 6.30 am to 10.30 pm,the middle and high-school students are now having a much more healthy and productive kind of education. They are being taken in huge numbers out to the countryside, to learn how to becom...

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The 22 All-Time Horror/Action Movie Flops

Funny story: The 22 All-Time Horror/Action Movie Flops

The Top Twenty-Two Horror/Action Movie Flops Of All Time, Pulled After Only One Showing! "The Hills Have The Mumps" "Raging Bowels "Norman Bates & Mother Double-Date" "The Good, The Bad & The Ugly Cop" "A Hard Day's Diet...BRAINS!!" "Headless In Seattle" "Edgar Allan Poe's The Tentpole Master." "Mr. Hannibal's Neighborhood." "Night of the Living Daylights." "Attack of the Kill...

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Guttenberg Named as German Economics Minister

German Chancellor Angela Merkel has appointed Steve Guttenberg as her new Economics Minister today, following the resignation of former incumbent Michael Glos. The new role is a significant departure for Guttenberg, 51, who will step away from his...

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English Grit Running Out?

In a startling admission by the FA, it has come to light that they believe that England is finally running out of grit. "Gone are the days when you'd see Stuart Pearce running around screaming in a manly manner come hell or high water at anything...

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Berlusconi admits to bizarre sexual habits

Funny story: Berlusconi admits to bizarre sexual habits

The Italian Prime Minister Silvio Berlusconi has revealed on prime time TV that he has the most bizarre ritual when it comes to masturbating In an interview on Rai Uno, the septagenarian revealed more signs of the madness that is taking over his m...

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More accurate than time itself

Funny story: More accurate than time itself

A new clock developed by the National Physics Laboratory is redefining time itself. The current most accurate clock is a Caesium Fountain Ion clock that is accurate to within a second every 400 million years, but physicists felt that they could do...

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Brown's Cow Tax Relief

Funny story: Brown's Cow Tax Relief

Gordon Brown Today announced that the planned Bovine Release Tax Bill will be put on hold til both the financial and meteorological climates change. The Bill, which was expected to become Law on the 5th February this year, has been sh...

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French Fried At US - Take Back Statue Of Liberty

Funny story: French Fried At US - Take Back Statue Of Liberty

France, tired of taking all the crap that it has gotten from the U.S. has retaliated by taking back the Statue of Liberty, once a gift from them. Ever since Bush started the Iraqi war and called them wusses for not helping out, French opinion of her...

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Gay "Brigaydes" Rout Terrorist Opposition

Funny story: Gay "Brigaydes" Rout Terrorist Opposition

Many modern thinkers have suggested that homophobia is a disabling problem not just for gays but for the homohaters themselves. As this theory has been applied to modern warfare, especially conflicts involving homophobic traditions like fundament...

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R&B's Chris Brown's Parole Officer Accepts Grammy in His Name

Funny story: R&B's Chris Brown's Parole Officer Accepts Grammy in His Name

Rhythmn and blues star, Chris Brown was scheduled to perform at the awards ceremony and was nominated for a Grammy this year. When the envelope was opened and his mnmae was read as one of the night's big winners, the overvoice announced: "Accept...

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British Network to Air Sooty, Paki and Golliwog

Funny story: British Network to Air Sooty, Paki and Golliwog

A major British broadcaster has announced that it will be airing a new race based drama serial called Sooty, Paki and Golliwog. In a Masterpiece Theatre style format Carol Thatcher, recently unemployed race relations counselor and half-daughter o...

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Woody Allen to Release Vicki, Christina, Barcelona, Syphilis

Funny story: Woody Allen to Release Vicki, Christina, Barcelona, Syphilis

Woody Allen is working on a sequel to his wildly popular sex pilgrimmage to Gaudi's cathedral: Vicki, Christina, Barcelona. Allen the great film author is rumored to have gotten the idea while recovery from a case of syphilis while on location in...

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Joe Torre Surprised A-Fraud Even Has Balls

Funny story: Joe Torre Surprised A-Fraud Even Has Balls

When former Yankee manager Joe Torre read in the spoof.com that Madonna was describing Alex Rodriguez' testicles as pebble like, A-Rod's old skipper reported shock. "I worked with him on a daily basis and he never showed any evidence of having...

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Court orders Madoff to Zimbabwe

Funny story: Court orders Madoff to Zimbabwe

Ponzi scheme master Bernard Madoff and his attorney have reached an agreement with the Federal District Court in Detroit today that deports the financial genius to Zimbabwe, Africa. Prosecutors and Madoff's attorney negotiated the plea agreement at a...

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Bong maker latest sponsor to drop Phelps

Funny story: Bong maker latest sponsor to drop Phelps

Another company has decided to leave the Phelps business. Kakadu Bongs, Inc., a bong maker based in Nimbin, Australia, has decided to terminate its eight year contract with Olympic swimmer Michael Phelps only six months after the deal was signed.

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Vaginas and peckers go virtual reality

Funny story: Vaginas and peckers go virtual reality

Silicone vaginas and penises, part of a new virtual reality package offered by Microsoft Corporation makes its debut this weekend, and CEO Bill Gates, as usual, is behind the state of the art hardware and software for the game experience. Said to...

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