Fresh from the England team's embarrassing humiliation by the West Indies on Saturday, the England cricket selectors have acted swiftly to supress criticism, and have recalled ancient treasure, Sir Geoffrey Boycott to the team for the Second Test match.
Yorkshireman Boycott, 68, who played his last Test back on New Year's Day in 1982, is the outspoken voice of English cricket, whose various faux-pas have made him cricket's equivalent of the Duke of Edinburgh.
Frequently bedecked in his trademark Panama hat, Boycott has been openly critical of England's performances of late, particularly the First Test drubbing in the West Indies last weekend, culminating in England's humbling 51 all out.
It has been a baptism of fire for new captain Andrew Strauss, and with the mess in the dressing room at the moment, a steadying influence like Boycott may be just what is needed.
Boycott, who was the inspiration behind the Monty Python Four Yorkshiremen sketch, said:
"By 'eck! What a mickle from a muckle! Them nig-nogs shan't get me out in a hurry!"
