Faith Healing Rebrands as Holistic Health Remedy
Turning around a near-century-long slump in new customer acquisitions, proponents of healing via faith, prayer, and the laying of hands have successfully rebranded their variety of spiritual ministration as a holistic health remedy. "There's no re...
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Satan Objects to Being Demonized by Catholic Church
"I may not have the greatest reputation," said Satan, "but when my name is mentioned, do you immediately think 'pedophilia'? Of course not! And to think the Catholic Church is trying to demonize me." Hurt by its fateful decision to limit the Trini...
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Tommy Robinson Converts To Islam
In a move which has startled many of his most committed followers on Facebook, the activist and political operative, Tommy Robinson, has announced he has converted to Islam. Robinson, also known as Andrew McMaster, Paul Harris, Wayne King, and Ste...
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Nashville Man Notices God Kind of a Deadbeat In His Life
Ben Tuttle was happy for his friend Lance Johnson, who quit a tiresome, ill-paying grind of a job without any sort of backup plan, and then, just before his landlord was about to begin eviction proceedings, was offered a position out of the blue at h...
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Angel Experiences Unprecedented Acceptance in Nashville
For her whole life, Lucinda Carlile, an angel, struggled to find people willing to trust and accept her - until she found her way to Music City, Tennessee, where she says she's experienced heretofore unimaginable levels of credibility. "We all cra...
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Arabic Porno Magazine Goes On Sale From Today
A 'Men's Magazine', so indecent, that we are unable to print a picture from it, goes on sale in the Persian Gulf from today. Instead, we have provided a picture of another magazine of a similar ilk, which is also geared towards Arabic men. The...
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Alabama Legalizes Rape
God Admits He Is An Atheist
Bettany Hughes Admirers Warn Off Frustrated Alice Roberts Fans
Struggling Catholic Church Lays Off Holy Spirit
Did Jesus Wear Socks and Sandals, or Did He Paint His Toenails?
Theologian Comes Up with Brilliant New Rationalization for Why God Doesn't Answer Prayers
The British Parliament Loves Satan
Ramadan Under Threat, As Muslims Seen Nibbling On Snacks During The Daytime
Nashville Man Sees an Angel and Friends and Family Have No Trouble Believing Him
Christians Follow Pakistan with Campaign for Spoof Writer's Death Sentence
Islamic Sharia Law Would Make Luton England's Capital
God To Humanity: Shut The Fuck Up Already With The Prayers
Theodore McCarrick Hopes There Is No God
The former archbishop of Washington, D.C., who is currently mired in allegations of sexual abuse, has said that he hopes that there is no God, otherwise he is in a shitload of trouble. Theodore McCarrick, now 88, faces charges of sexually abusing...
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People Still Go To Church On Sunday While Cheating On Each Other And Looking For More Money, According To Report
After surveys and statistical data were analyzed at the University of Colorado last week, the results indicated that people actually do cheat on each other constantly, while looking for more money as they steadfastly maintain a need to go to Church e...
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Vegan-Friendly Atheist Allows Animals to Go to Heaven
In an effort to recruit vegans to the secular movement, outspoken non-believer Alex Harrison, host of the popular podcast Smarter than God, stated that animals could go to the same place that good people go after they die. "There's no reason that...
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Woman's Nipples Mistaken For 'Chapel Hat Pegs'
Confusion reigned supreme at a church in Oxfordshire at the weekend, when members of a congregation inadvertently mistook the enormous swollen nipples of voluptuous Carol Forderman for 'chapel hat pegs', and hung their coats on them! Carol, 43, ha...
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Scientists Conclude the Soul is Composed of Dark Matter
Scientists, today, announced they believe they have solved the longest standing problem in human history. Unsure why they never thought of this before, they reticently admitted that the idea of something so undetectable and frankly impossible as Dark...
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Vatican to Release New Bible in Modernized Latin
VATICAN, ROME - Pope Francis plans to publish a "Modern and Scientific Bible for the World." However, it will be written entirely in Latin, because ... that's what the Catholic Church does. Inside sources say His Holiness has spent over a year on thi...
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Trump And God Agree To Disagree
Supreme Being and Ruler of the Universe, Donald Trump, met its creator, God, this morning in a lively round of discussions on current events, but, as neither was prepared to give ground on key issues, a stalemate was declared, and they adjourned the...
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Buddhist Chanting Got On Man's Wick
Prolonged Buddhist chanting over a 3-day period because of a funeral, got on the nerves of one man so much, he considered going to the nearby temple and burning it down. The man, whose identity must be guarded to avoid any repercussions, awoke on...
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Nigerian Televangelist's Penis Is "The Longest In Africa"
A Nigerian televangelist operating in South Africa has told a courtroom that he has the longest penis in Africa. Timothy Osotomo, 60, is appearing before the court in Johannesburg on 90-odd counts of doing illegal sexy things, some of them with hi...
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Nashville Man Accidentally Dropped by God
The survivor of a traumatic childhood involving physical abuse by an alcoholic father and the suicide death of his revered older brother when he was just a teen, 36-year-old Josiah Dickerson of Nashville, Tennessee, took great comfort in the belief t...
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Naked Spears Mum as Rabbi Reverses Mormon Baptism of Dead Jews
WASHINGTON, DC -- Rabbi Jacob Baer stood before his congregation at Temple Sinai on Military Road yesterday morning, poised to perform a ritual that he had perfected just hours before. On a long table before him were a silver bowl, a small dark blue...
Read full storyFunny Religion Headlines
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Wicca Finally Proven to Be a Hoax
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Church goers forced to talk in tongues
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Yodelling offends Muslims
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Ten Commandments have at last been updated
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Heofon: A New Non-Secular World on the Horizon?
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Yorkshire Psalms: Psalm 23
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LDS Church Announces Acquisition of Westboro Baptist Church
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Jesus Comes Out of the Closet … Or Does He?
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Nashville Man Who Decides to Follow Jesus Ends Up Sitting in One Place for Really Long Time
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Sinéad O'Connor Has Grown A Muslim Beard
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Psychiatry Deemed a Religion in New Study
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How does religion work?
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America is global epicenter of daft religions
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Over-used "You nailed it" TV talent show statement has biblical roots
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Religion Takes a Nose Dive
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Harry Redknapp To Found A New Religion - Cockology
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Cross Dressing through history
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Plan Proposed to End Religious Strife
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Creation Scientists Teaching Snakes to Talk
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Shamima Begum Has Been Fitted For Some Clogs
