Funny story: Faith Healing Rebrands as Holistic Health Remedy

Faith Healing Rebrands as Holistic Health Remedy

Turning around a near-century-long slump in new customer acquisitions, proponents of healing via faith, prayer, and the laying of hands have successfully rebranded their variety of spiritual ministration as a holistic health remedy. "There's no re...

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Funny story: Satan Objects to Being Demonized by Catholic Church

Satan Objects to Being Demonized by Catholic Church

"I may not have the greatest reputation," said Satan, "but when my name is mentioned, do you immediately think 'pedophilia'? Of course not! And to think the Catholic Church is trying to demonize me." Hurt by its fateful decision to limit the Trini...

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Funny story: Tommy Robinson Converts To Islam

Tommy Robinson Converts To Islam

In a move which has startled many of his most committed followers on Facebook, the activist and political operative, Tommy Robinson, has announced he has converted to Islam. Robinson, also known as Andrew McMaster, Paul Harris, Wayne King, and Ste...

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Funny story: Nashville Man Notices God Kind of a Deadbeat In His Life

Nashville Man Notices God Kind of a Deadbeat In His Life

Ben Tuttle was happy for his friend Lance Johnson, who quit a tiresome, ill-paying grind of a job without any sort of backup plan, and then, just before his landlord was about to begin eviction proceedings, was offered a position out of the blue at h...

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Funny story: Angel Experiences Unprecedented Acceptance in Nashville

Angel Experiences Unprecedented Acceptance in Nashville

For her whole life, Lucinda Carlile, an angel, struggled to find people willing to trust and accept her - until she found her way to Music City, Tennessee, where she says she's experienced heretofore unimaginable levels of credibility. "We all cra...

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Funny story: Arabic Porno Magazine Goes On Sale From Today

Arabic Porno Magazine Goes On Sale From Today

A 'Men's Magazine', so indecent, that we are unable to print a picture from it, goes on sale in the Persian Gulf from today. Instead, we have provided a picture of another magazine of a similar ilk, which is also geared towards Arabic men. The...

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Funny story: Theodore McCarrick Hopes There Is No God

Theodore McCarrick Hopes There Is No God

The former archbishop of Washington, D.C., who is currently mired in allegations of sexual abuse, has said that he hopes that there is no God, otherwise he is in a shitload of trouble. Theodore McCarrick, now 88, faces charges of sexually abusing...

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Funny story: People Still Go To Church On Sunday While Cheating On Each Other And Looking For More Money, According To Report

People Still Go To Church On Sunday While Cheating On Each Other And Looking For More Money, According To Report

After surveys and statistical data were analyzed at the University of Colorado last week, the results indicated that people actually do cheat on each other constantly, while looking for more money as they steadfastly maintain a need to go to Church e...

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Funny story: Vegan-Friendly Atheist Allows Animals to Go to Heaven

Vegan-Friendly Atheist Allows Animals to Go to Heaven

In an effort to recruit vegans to the secular movement, outspoken non-believer Alex Harrison, host of the popular podcast Smarter than God, stated that animals could go to the same place that good people go after they die. "There's no reason that...

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Funny story: Woman's Nipples Mistaken For 'Chapel Hat Pegs'

Woman's Nipples Mistaken For 'Chapel Hat Pegs'

Confusion reigned supreme at a church in Oxfordshire at the weekend, when members of a congregation inadvertently mistook the enormous swollen nipples of voluptuous Carol Forderman for 'chapel hat pegs', and hung their coats on them! Carol, 43, ha...

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Funny story: Scientists Conclude the Soul is Composed of Dark Matter

Scientists Conclude the Soul is Composed of Dark Matter

Scientists, today, announced they believe they have solved the longest standing problem in human history. Unsure why they never thought of this before, they reticently admitted that the idea of something so undetectable and frankly impossible as Dark...

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Funny story: Vatican to Release New Bible in Modernized Latin

Vatican to Release New Bible in Modernized Latin

VATICAN, ROME - Pope Francis plans to publish a "Modern and Scientific Bible for the World." However, it will be written entirely in Latin, because ... that's what the Catholic Church does. Inside sources say His Holiness has spent over a year on thi...

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Funny story: Sinéad O'Connor Rejected By Islam

Sinéad O'Connor Rejected By Islam

Sinéad O'Connor, the controversial and attention-seeking Irish singer, who has converted to Islam, and said that she no longer wants to live amongst white people 'as long as she lives', has been told to go and fuck herself by Muslims. O'Connor -...

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Funny story: Man makes holy house of cress

Man makes holy house of cress

It sounds the mutterings of madmen, but in Chiswell, Devon, Charles Ainsworth, 45 has finally completed two years of painstaking work, and completed his house made entirely from CRESS!...

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Funny story: Trump And God Agree To Disagree

Trump And God Agree To Disagree

Supreme Being and Ruler of the Universe, Donald Trump, met its creator, God, this morning in a lively round of discussions on current events, but, as neither was prepared to give ground on key issues, a stalemate was declared, and they adjourned the...

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Funny story: Buddhist Chanting Got On Man's Wick

Buddhist Chanting Got On Man's Wick

Prolonged Buddhist chanting over a 3-day period because of a funeral, got on the nerves of one man so much, he considered going to the nearby temple and burning it down. The man, whose identity must be guarded to avoid any repercussions, awoke on...

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Funny story: Nigerian Televangelist's Penis Is "The Longest In Africa"

Nigerian Televangelist's Penis Is "The Longest In Africa"

A Nigerian televangelist operating in South Africa has told a courtroom that he has the longest penis in Africa. Timothy Osotomo, 60, is appearing before the court in Johannesburg on 90-odd counts of doing illegal sexy things, some of them with hi...

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Funny story: Nashville Man Accidentally Dropped by God

Nashville Man Accidentally Dropped by God

The survivor of a traumatic childhood involving physical abuse by an alcoholic father and the suicide death of his revered older brother when he was just a teen, 36-year-old Josiah Dickerson of Nashville, Tennessee, took great comfort in the belief t...

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Funny story: Greek Mythology Debunked

Greek Mythology Debunked

Age-old Greek creation mythology regarding the universe's journey from the primeval void of Chaos to a virtual pantheon of all-powerful deities has been definitively debunked, according to the latest scientific reports. "It's disappointing," said...

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Funny story: Naked Spears Mum as Rabbi Reverses Mormon Baptism of Dead Jews

Naked Spears Mum as Rabbi Reverses Mormon Baptism of Dead Jews

WASHINGTON, DC -- Rabbi Jacob Baer stood before his congregation at Temple Sinai on Military Road yesterday morning, poised to perform a ritual that he had perfected just hours before. On a long table before him were a silver bowl, a small dark blue...

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