Revolutionary "Christian Atheist" Urges People to Pray for Prayers to Start Working

Funny story written by Chrissy Benson

Thursday, 21 November 2019

image for Revolutionary "Christian Atheist" Urges People to Pray for Prayers to Start Working
Proponents of Christian atheism emphasize the humility that comes with knowingly praying to something that does not exist.

Having accepted Jesus Christ as his Lord and Savior but quite clear that no divine being is doing anything to aid the human condition, Thomas Gallicchio, a self-identified "Christian atheist," is urging people to pray for prayers to start working - and for God to come into being.

"Prayers can either accomplish everything or nothing," said Gallicchio. "Let's aim for the moon."

Gallicchio went on to note that while there is no evidence that any "God" exists, there is also no evidence showing that miracles aren't immune to lack of evidence. As he put it, "With miracles, there are no bounds to what we can accomplish. Or maybe there are, but why focus on them? Let's give this prayer thing a shot."

Gallicchio's approach has proven extremely appealing to countless individuals who value rationality but also harbor a desperate desire to believe.

"Christian atheist, I can get on board with that," said Joey McConnell of Nashville, Tennessee, who added that, fortunately, his new spiritual identity hasn't turned off his devoutly Christian friends. "They tend to stop listening after they hear the 'Christian' part. They assume anything that comes after that must be okay."

He added, "Also, I'm not sure they know what an atheist is."

And for those uncomfortable with the prospect of becoming an infidel, even one of the Christian variety, Gallicchio emphasized that since embracing Christian atheism, his prayers have become even more heartfelt. "There's no humility as pure as the humility that comes when you realize you're praying to nothing. I think people will find that it really takes them to the next spiritual level."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more