Funny story - Ulvalde Police Leaders, Afraid of Being Injured, Could Not Confront Gunman

Ulvalde Police Leaders, Afraid of Being Injured, Could Not Confront Gunman

Ulvalde police leaders at the site did not want their 19 officers to get injured, so could not storm the building. “We assumed the kids were dead already, so why risk officers’ lives?” “These officers are very expensive to replace and have wive…

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Funny story - Hunter Thompson Suicide Note Found

Hunter Thompson Suicide Note Found

ASPEN - Hunter S. Thompson, who fatally shot himself at his Colorado home Sunday night, left behind a 352-page suicide note, say Aspen police. According to the note, which will be published in book form by Rolling Stone early next week, Thomps...

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Funny story - Yardies Gangs Get Tough Love From Tough Babies

Yardies Gangs Get Tough Love From Tough Babies

In the never ending fight against the drug trafficking, shootings and general brutalities of Yardie crime gangs, police are now facing the fact that lawful tactics have failed. This has led to the formation of a vigilante gang of tough tattooed infan...

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Funny story - El Chapo's Sons in Gun Battle During 'Take Your Child to Work Day'

El Chapo's Sons in Gun Battle During 'Take Your Child to Work Day'

Joaquin "El Chapo" Guzman was spotted beaming with pride yesterday, when his four sons fought an hours-long gun battle with Mexican police during the annual 'Take Your Child To Work Day'. The gun battle left 13 people dead and scores injured, in Sin...

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Funny story - New Orleans Police Release "Cops Gone Wild!" Video

New Orleans Police Release "Cops Gone Wild!" Video

Jefferson Parish -- Those fun-lovin' New Orleans Police have figured out a way to make crime pay -- not with kickbacks, or corruption, but with a "Cops Gone Wild!" video showing clips of suspects being beaten, reporters being threatened...

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Funny story - Free 'Bong Hits 4 Jesus' bumper stickers annoy drivers

Free 'Bong Hits 4 Jesus' bumper stickers annoy drivers

In a wave of vandalism stretching across dozens of states, "Bong Hits 4 Jesus" stickers have begun to appear on cars and other private property.

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Funny story - 'Heartless' thief steals Disability Scooter

'Heartless' thief steals Disability Scooter

A heartless thief broke into the property of locally named Spack McCrackin, in Cradley Heath, West Midlands, and 'fled' on the £2,000 machine. Det Con Stirling Moss said: "This is a very upsetting case as one person's thoughtless crime as left the...

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Funny story - Isle of Wight Citizens given Diplomatic Immunity

Isle of Wight Citizens given Diplomatic Immunity

Following a debate that ran into the early hours of this morning, the Isle of Wight Council has narrowly voted in favour of granting all residents of the Island diplomatic immunity. The surprise move comes after a recent report by the Association of...

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Funny story - Paranoid Cop Falsely Accuses Booger Slinger

Paranoid Cop Falsely Accuses Booger Slinger

As police across the fruited plain are being squirted with water pistols and “deloused” with buckets of water, many members of the so-called “thin blue line” have become paranoid. A Marion County, Indiana, officer, Dee Jay, who asked to remain ano...

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Funny story - Another top cop suicide

Another top cop suicide

Snowdonia, Wales - (Rioters): Yet another top UK cop has been found dead just 24 hours after Sergeant Jim Bergerac, Camilla's head of security, was found fatally injured with multiple gunshot wounds to his wallet, head and chest.

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Funny story - Drunk Tom Hanks Ruins Hill Family Reunion

Drunk Tom Hanks Ruins Hill Family Reunion

Decatur, GA - Decatur Police were called to the Oglethorpe State Park on Sunday in response to a disruption of the peace call. Upon arriving at the scene of the call, officers were shocked by what they found.

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Funny story - Well-Endowed Bikini Mom Kicked Out of A Water Park For Being Too Voluptuously Sexy!

Well-Endowed Bikini Mom Kicked Out of A Water Park For Being Too Voluptuously Sexy!

INDEPENDENCE, Missouri - A 42-year-old woman identified as Madeline Schaffer took her 14-year-old daughter to The Shiver Me Timbers Water Park in Independence. Schaffer said that she and her little girl were having a fantastic time when all of a s...

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Funny story - Nottingham News for W/E: 6th May 2012

Nottingham News for W/E: 6th May 2012

Sunday 29th April 2012 Topic: Development - Asda "Asda plans to regenerate derelict site in St Ann's, Nottingham" Source: BBC News Extract: Plans to build a supermarket and homes in a "run-down" area of Nottingham are to go on public display. Asda has earmarked a site on Carlton Road in St Ann's for the store, which it said could create 200 jobs. The company said the store, which...

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Funny story - Schmidt & Weissen to produce bidirectional pistol

Schmidt & Weissen to produce bidirectional pistol

Schmidt & Weissen, a major gun manufacturer in the US, is developing a bidirectional pistol. Paul Gant of Schmidt & Weissen says, "This is the only gun I'd recommend to scumbags and known gang members." The police have mixed feelings about...

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Funny story - Police, Rescue Respond to Unusual Kidnapping

Police, Rescue Respond to Unusual Kidnapping

Denver, CO [PP] -- Police and paramedics responded to what had to be their most unusual kidnapping case. A man who had not opened his refrigerator door in more than two years had the shock of his life. When he finally got around to opening the refrig...

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Funny story - Mayor of Vancouver apologises after retired black Judge handcuffed and arrested in case of mistaken identity

Mayor of Vancouver apologises after retired black Judge handcuffed and arrested in case of mistaken identity

A well-loved 81-year black Supreme Court Judge is the latest in a series of totally innocent people of colour arrested or beaten by North American police. Selwyn Romilly, who was the first black appointee to the British Columbia Supreme Court, wa…

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Funny story - A 96-Year-Old Woman Is Caught Trying To Steal a 19-Foot Christmas Tree From Walmart

A 96-Year-Old Woman Is Caught Trying To Steal a 19-Foot Christmas Tree From Walmart

MOBILE, Alabama - (Satire News) - It’s hard to believe that national retail stores such as Dilly Dally, Lollygag, and Walmart are already starting to sell Christmas items such as ornaments, wreaths, Christmas Ramen, and of course Christmas trees.

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Funny story - Iraqis Find New Jobs in Florida

Iraqis Find New Jobs in Florida

Some of Saddam Hussein's former police officers are due to start a new life in America -- as Bush Florida campaign workers . When he left Iraq, Paul Bremer is believed to have tapped his "favorite Iraqis" for the task, and arranged for...

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Funny story - Sir Topham Hatt sought by London police for deviant porn distribution

Sir Topham Hatt sought by London police for deviant porn distribution

Sir Topham Hatt from the beloved children's show 'Thomas the Tank Engine' is reportedly on the run from the law this morning after it was learned he's at the center of a vast, 20+ year "deviant pornography" ring. Sir Hatt was questioned last year…

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Funny story - White Police Officer Almost Doesn't Shoot Handcuffed Unarmed Black Man

White Police Officer Almost Doesn't Shoot Handcuffed Unarmed Black Man

A Georgia state law enforcement officer was commended for following procedure during a routine traffic stop that nearly turned tragic earlier this week. Deputy Jason Hancock continued police department tradition of shooting unarmed black men, but...

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