Should Elon Musk Be Deported Back To South Africa?
After buying Twitter and watching it take a nose dive, then letting Donald Trump (the great abuser of free speech) back on the platform, is it time to consider sending Mr. Musk back to South Africa? Short answer: Yes. Long answer: Yes, yes!…
Read full storyDouble-Speak App for the Whole Horrifying Truth
Silicon Valley computer geeks have created a new app that is capable of determining Republican lies. The Double-Speak is an app for your phone that, when held up to the words of anyone, especially a Republican, will tell you what they are really t…
Read full storyWho’s The Threat This Time?
There are so many Russian and China lovers in American politics, it’s tough to find any Republican who also hasn’t taken some kind of kick-back from Putin or Xi. These politicians love foreigners who have money and hate foreigners who do not. Thu…
Read full storyLoser Lake Becomes a Housekeeping Spy
Kari Lake has lost and will soon be looking for a job. Karma Kari shows herself quite handy with a vacuum cleaner, making sure her Lord and Master, Trump, has a clean carpet on which to trudge his soleless shoes. Will Kari become a Boebert-leve…
Read full storyElon Hughes Needs More Snakeoil Booze
Elon Musk proudly reinstates Donald Twitter on Trump … or something like that. The rich and powerful and evil don’t write checks or do favours for the poor; instead, the rich help the rich, and the poor can go fuck themselves. Elon is right wing,…
Read full storyYe Rhymes With Pee
The Artist formerly known as Prince changed his name and brand because corrupt music executives were, well, corrupt, and Prince didn’t wanna play their game no more. What game is Kanye West playing when he changes his name to Ye? Trying to rebrand…
Read full storyVlad Bans Carrey … and Barely Makes News
Jim Carrey cannot go to Russia. Putin has banned certain people from various countries who dared support Ukraine and criticize the Great Russian Bear from entering that bear … Does Putin not get it? If he banned A, B or C-list celebrities, who fuc…
Read full storyCrash Test Moon Dummies and NASA’s Great Lie
Three crash-test dummies, or better yet, space radiation test dummies are heading to the moon. They will be covered in 5,600 sensors to test the radiation levels as they travel to the moon. Will they get out and walk and take selfies and drive a moon…
Read full storyAlito is a Burrito
Well, that wacky American Supreme Court is at it again. Old “Justice” Alito quoted some git from Britain in the 1700s or thereabouts about why it was a good thing to tell women they couldn’t abort a rapist’s baby. And when the law comes from a pa…
Read full storyLondon Bobbies Panic at the Evil Glare of Rocky Raccoon
The Smiths once sang about panic on the streets of London … and now for something completely normal. London cops with billy clubs are about as effective as London cops with whistles and tiny notebooks and tinier pencils. Have you heard of mace, pe…
Read full storyBilly’s Hot Geek Injection Tour 2022
Who wants to hop on the Bill Gates Tour 2002? Billy boy is in Kenya, where he’ll meet with leaders and lots of little kids who are begging for Bill’s needle in their arms. Then he’ll head on over to Madagascar, South Africa, The Gambia, the Congo…
Read full storyWhat’s Your Game, Fame?
Rumors are flying! Has Elon Musk not only acquired Twitter, but also a new love to compliment his narcissism? You bet he has! But alas, mystery still surrounds WHO is Elon’s new love? Is it a Kardashian? Is it Kanye? Or is it man-whore Pete Dav…
Read full storyRaisin’ the Rape in Amerika
Now that American women can’t get an abortion, they can still get raped and be forced to keep the kid and raise it – hopefully Republican. This is great news for the white race and those who insist that it’s greater than other races cuz Jesus says so…
Read full storyCreamy Semen for the Next Generation W
Skunk Hork, Alabama Well, if one never thought anything good could come from the American Deep South (like a Deep State), guess again! Now that white racists are worried that their skin color won’t be around in, say, 100 years, maybe 500 (who k…
Read full storyAlexa, You Fuckin’ Censoring Robot Wife!
Hey, how you doin’? I’m Vinny Carbone I got one of those, whaddaya call it, Alexa robot things from Amazon or whatever. It’s a hunk a shit but my wife likes it, her idea, she says it’s the way of the future or some horseshit – future my ass! Anywa…
Read full storyNFTs For Those Who Can’t Spell NFT
New NFTs have come onto the market, and all by people one wouldn’t think would know how to create an NFT or even what one is. Here’s just a short list of those VIPs and celebrities who have their own NFTs (created by nerds who were well paid with…
Read full storyI Can See Paradise By The Dark Side of the Moon
Trump has done a YUGE deal with China to put Trump casinos, golf clubs, rape parlours, groping classes, incest swinger’s clubs, diaper factories, an Melania vagina-scented candles (and Ivanka too) on the Moon! The dark side, that is, where only Ch…
Read full storyMoon Musk: Smell Like A Whole Lotta Elon!
Hey guys, do smell like shit, but you wanna smell like a billion bucks? Try the new Moon Musk … … the cologne for rich egocentric narcissists who can’t smoke a cigar with both eyes open. It’ll make women coo and swoon all the way to the moon!…
Read full storyKaren Wigs Colonize like Tribbles
Elon Musk has stuffed his latest rocket full of Karen wigs just as an act of revenge (since he likes to kill that which has insulted him in the past, like Twitter) against those disgruntled Twitter employees who dared to call His Lordship a Space Kar…
Read full storyJustin vs. Xi: To Starch or Not to Starch?
Reports have just come in about Justin Trudeau and the Head of China, Xi, having words, then Justin filmed wandering away as though he had a Mr. Big in his drawers. What was not shown later that day was what is reported in the following transcript…
Read full storyFlip Off A Fascist
After seeing the very polite (very Canadian) dis that Justin Trudeau gave to the fascist cunt who leads China, (you do what I say and no tell everybody what I say – I your master – you obey me like billions of Chinese slaves I rule over and torture –…
Read full storyHave Money, Will Kill
Have you ever wanted to kill somebody, but figured you’d never get away with it? Well now, think no more, friend. In a capitalist world, if you have enough money, you can get away with every crime there is, even murder! And other capitalists with…
Read full storyThe United Kingdom's 889th Supreme Liverpool Artillery Regiment Reports Injuries Due to Friendly Fire
THE DONETSK VALLEY, Ukraine - (Satire News) - The BBC has reported that England's 889th Supreme Liverpool Artillery Regiment is sad to announce that they have sustained several injuries to their troops due to friendly fire. A reporter with the BBC…
Read full storyA Winston-Salem Weatherwoman Voted The Sexiest Transgender In America
WINSTON-SALEM, North Carolina - (Satire News) - National Rumblings reporter Traci Diddle reports that a transgender weatherwoman from Winston-Salem's Channel 69, has just been named The Sexiest Transgender In America. Miss Diddle reports that Bijo…
Read full storyKing Charles Has Named The Monthly Buckingham Palace Fox Hunt In Honor of His Mum, Queen Elizabeth
BUCKINGHAM PALACE, (Satire News) - Everyone knows that the late queen's pride and joy was her monthly participation in the Buck House fox hunts. Queen Elizabeth's best friend, Piers Morgan, told the BBC, that outside of having her feet massaged by…
Read full storyTrumpism has Invaded the Great American Bake-Off
"It used to be a pleasant show - older women baking delicious cakes and friendly competition, " said Lance Bottomly, aging Hollywood star - and honorary judge of the Bake-off. Now that Republican Trumpers with their orange Hats and aprons have t…
Read full storyIn a Brilliant Business Move Uber Is Now Using Bicycles-Built-For-Two
NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - Boom Boom News reporter Hacienda Fiddle reports that Uber has decided to use bicycles-built-for-two in their day-to-day, night-to-night business operation. The idea was widely received by the Uber powers-that-be, as…
Read full storyFIFA Bans Pretzels At The World Cup
QATAR - (Sports Satire) - FIFA has just announced that it has decided to ban the sale of pretzels at the Word Cup games. FIFA spokesman Carlo Saveeno said that the reason is due to the fact that they cause a condition known as Sudofeenacripy, whic…
Read full storyGodzilla Runs for President
Godzilla is on his private tropical island (Florida) and the Military tries to destroy him (The Republican Party). But it is futile. He just goes over stomps a few - and the rest kneel down in Worship. Meanwhile behind him - thousand of Godzill…
Read full storyVatican Releases New Software Package
The COVID crisis, combined with the proliferation of high speed internet connections, has resulted in large numbers of school children learning remotely, rather than attending class in person. This development has proven especially problematic f…
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