Daniel Radcliffe And Emma Watson To Star In Nude Remake Of Stephen King's 'Misery'
Insiders insist that Harry Potter stars, Daniel Radcliffe and Emma Watson are all set to star in a naturist version of Stephen King's best selling novel, 'Misery' In the nude. Skoob Entertainment News can't verify this, because it was sourced b...
Read full storyGrowing Resentment as WikiLeaks Disclosures Show Who's Hot, Who's Not
Britain's betters are responding with increasing petulance, defensiveness and typical misguided self-importance over the emerging stars of the smash hit multi-part series 'WikiLeaks." The disclosures, naming such leading lights as Gorgon Brown and P...
Read full storyIt's Raining Humans in Sporting Arenas Across America
A bizarre series of unfortunate accidents have been plaguing sporting arenas across America. The accidents have resulted in two fatalities and a number of injuries. In Los Angeles a two year old child fatally fell 50 feet from a luxury sky box in...
Read full story62 Year old Man Gets Probation For Having Sex With His Dog
Los Angeles, a man who has adopted dogs from Los Angeles shelters has pleaded guilty to animal cruelty and lewd conduct for having sex with his female German shepherd mix. Los Angeles prosecutors gave Wade Strickland three years probation with th...
Read full storyCCA Encourages Prison Gladiators, Welcome to the Gulage
CCA, Corrections Corporation of America, a private corporation that oversees, and is responsible for the health and well being of some 75,000 prisoners across America, has been accused of negligent care and irresponsible conduct. One of the prison...
Read full storySnow Causes People To Drive Like Idiots
The weather blasting Britain has been blamed for making people drive like arseholes. Road traffic accidents were up 60% last night as people slowly begin to realise that cars don't stop very well on ice. Mike Fuckwit, 32, told us "I was driving...
Read full storyThere's no brown Hobbit in the Lord of the Rings la, la, la, la-la
Small people with brown skin were up in arms today as they were told they are not welcome in Middle Earth. Chief Hobbit Bilbo Baggins broke the news at a press conference in New Zealand where hundreds of hopefuls auditioned to spend time in the Sh...
Read full storyRobert Pattinson And Kristen Stewart Attacked By Daleks!
In a spirited attempt to rack up as many stories as possible for a given month, crap website TheSpoof.com has plumbed new depths in its search for an informed readership. By claiming that Twilight stars, Robert Pattinson and Kristen Stewart were a...
Read full storyKorean Conflict Revitalized by Tensions Over Hag Fish Mucus Rights
Seoul, South Korea - After the ground-breaking study regarding the use of hag fish mucus as a means of combating erectile dysfunction was released last week, a maelstrom of changes have occurred. Economies have shifted and fishermen have complete...
Read full storyObama's Government Motors "Volt" Rolls into Showrooms; Taxpayers Get a Jolt in their Wallet!
The long awaited and heralded Obama Government Motors Chevy Volt managed to limp into Dealer showrooms today with customers avoiding them in droves as the real truth about the Green Grocery Getter Gets out! Costing the taxpayers $40,000 to build w...
Read full storyX-Factor Cast-Off Wagner Carrilho To Tour With The All-Girl Band, The Saturdays
LONDON - Wagner Fiuza Carrilho's facial expression has gone from a blitheringly bleak frown to a bloomingly blissful smile. The Brazilian-born singer was eliminated from X-Factor during the past weekend. Carrilho reportedly told his personal hair...
Read full storyEcuador schmoozes Assange with passport, condo, own TV show in exchange for Wikileaks Chevron lawsuit cables
Quito - (Assange Ass Mess): "Plus all the gorgeous hot-assed sun-kisst Latinas you could ever shag!" was the gist of an excited Ecuador Justice Ministry negotiator's rant today. The offer to Wikileaks founder Julian Assange is said to include a Na...
Read full storyChildren Found to be World's Greatest Cause of Death
They are cute. They are cuddly. They drain your energy and finances. They are children and, according to researchers at the Fresno University of Nanite, Kinesiology, and Youth Studies, they are, directly and indirectly, the leading cause of death wor...
Read full storyWhich Vampire Wins The Knocker Contest?
Of all the Vampires on television or on the big screen, there is a contest to see which one has the best. Fandom Knockers Inc. are the ones who carry the biggest variety with the Classic Vampire, The Bela Lugosi Vampire, The Vlad The Impaler and B...
Read full storyUnited Hammered By Hammers At Upton Park
As the snow flew on that Godforsaken hovel, otherwise known as Upton Park, Manchester United fans sneaked out of the stadium following a 4-0 defeat to the mighty bubble blowing West Ham ICF merchants. United fan, Jarbo the Killer, admitted that Un...
Read full storyPrince William, Like Prince Charles To Marry Nanny Look Alike!
Prince William is following in his father's footsteps, according to the latest out of Britain, by marrying a woman who looks just like the nanny of his childhood! "Prince William's fiance Kate Middleton bears an almost uncanny resemblance to his n...
Read full storySusan Boyle Bails Out on O Holy Night Performance on The View
Susan Boyle had a performance scheduled on, The View, this morning. She was to sing the Christmas classic, O Holy Night when out of the blue her spectacular voice failed her. Not only did her voice fail her once but it did it twice. The second time B...
Read full storyLib Dem charity single set to top UK chart
Earlier today an announcement was made from Lib Dem HQ revealing that the Party is releasing a charity single in aid of the "children of andorra accused of lying and betraying" society. The song is to be a cover of the classic "shaddapa ya face" a...
Read full storyApple Unveil New Girlfriend App. For Iphone
Apple have today unveiled the new 'Girlfriend App." for the iPhone, claiming that it is "a huge leap forward in our bid to control the minds of every human being on Earth." In a conscious bid to move away from apps. that allow people to have fake lig...
Read full storyAustralian WikiLeaks is put on the Endangered List
Townsville, Queensland - Thought to be extinct, since the 1970's, WikiLeaks, discovered by Australian national Julian Assange has been put on the endangered list. The WikiLeaks (Whistlus Blowerwus), native to Australia, is known to have been to Kenya...
Read full storyCameron, Beckham and Wee Willy Windsor schmooze FIFA
Switzerland - (Gnomes Of Zurich Mess): The tosspot trio landed in Cloud Cuckooclock Land today ahead of the 2018 World Cup announcement. Billed as 'England's Finest!' their schmooze of bribery-accused FIFA officials promises discreet - and Wiki...
Read full storyWikiLeaks: Aliens Look Like Mummies Wrapped With Toilet Paper
The aliens reported by hundreds of people in West Virginia near Huntington had the shape of humans only wrapped in something like toilet paper, reads a copy of WikiLeaks, released a few hours ago. However, as usual, the US government hushed up the...
Read full storyCongress Goes Bankrupt, Asks For Bailout
The 111th Congress of what is supposedly the richest and most powerful country in the world, the United States of America, has declared bankruptcy. Following years of self inflicted, major party apartheid, selling out to corporate and higher class in...
Read full storyWiki-Leaks Loos Founder's Death Declared Suspicious
MI6 have tonight declared the death of a leading bathroom manufacturer suspicious. They believe he was the victim of a terrible case of mistaken identity. It was first thought that Mr Damien Brown committed suicide, just after his company went...
Read full storyOfficial Definition Makes The Word "Gay" Mean Bad
Top lexicographers have today announced new additions to, and definitions for, the words within the English language dictionary. Of these additions and revisions, however, there stands a solitary point of controversy - the word "gay" will now have th...
Read full storyWal-Mart Customers Don't Like Greeters
On Monday, a Wal-Mart customer pushed down a 100 year old greeter at a Milwaukee store because the customer didn't like the old lady. "I saw the old lady, and saw my future without Social Security, and I panicked and pushed the old lady. I know s...
Read full storyIllegal Downloader Sentenced To Death By Cheryl Cole
The owner of a fruit and veg stall in Leighton Buzzard market has today been sentenced to death by Cheryl Cole after being found guilty of illegally downloading her new album Messy Little Raindrops online. The male offender, who can't be named for...
Read full storyWikiLeaks Plugged with Gum; Spearmint, Officials Say
While the U.S. Department of State scrambles to mitigate the damage caused by the last ouster of Internet tidbits from various embassies around the world, Hillary Clinton has advised her own staff to remove the network cables from office computers an...
Read full storySpoof Writer 'PLECTRUM' Makes Huge Comeback!
Great news tonight from Spoof Central. Apparently, former Spoof contributor, PLECTRUM has announced that he is about to publish a Spoof story which exceeds the standard 100 word minimum word count. According to sources, PLECTRUM has been workin...
Read full storyDisney Not Happy with Gay Jack Sparrow
November 30 (Spoof News) Disney wasn't happy that Johnny Depp wanted Jack Sparrow to be gay or even hinted at being gay. "I thought Jack Sparrow was a little flamboyant and should be played that way. But the brass at Disney thought about getting...
Read full storyStudent Marcher Calls Sky News Reporter 'Wanker!' Live On Air
Sky News anchor, Anna Botting was visibly shaken on live TV last night as student demonstrators, protesting at the Lib-Dem cop out on education fees, were heard calling Sky News reporter, Jeremy Bender, a 'Wanker' live on air from Trafalgar Square.
Read full storyToilet Manufacturer Wiki-Leaks Loos Co-Founder Found Dead
The CEO and co-founder of the multinational toilet company Wiki-Leaks Loos has been found dead, washed up on the banks of the River Thames. Damien Brown's demise was not thoroughly unexpected because he did tell close friends and colleagues that...
Read full storyReese Witherspoon Seeks Spoof Writer
Reese Witherspoon told Glamour magazine that she was looking for a Spoof writer to share a few laughs with and maybe something more, if the writer met her standards for a mate. "In Hollywood, people put a lot of emphasis on the wrong things, and...
Read full storyRush Limbaugh Loves Role of Racist
Rush Limbaugh loves the role of number one racist on radio. "I used to deny that I was a racist, ah ah ah, but then I realized I needed to come to grips with who I am. I am a racist." Rush Limbaugh said on his radio show today. Rush was making...
Read full storyPrince Andrew, the Duke of York: "In the UK, we have the best geography teachers in the world!"
Buckingham Palace, LONDON: Prince Andrew, the Duke of York has praised the British education services with the quoted comment, "In the UK, we have the best geography teachers in the world!" The Duke of York has also railed at British anti-corrupt...
Read full storySpoof Writer Still Drinking...
A Spoof writer who vowed to stay in his basement until Sarah Palin went away is still hiding in his basement. "I am glad to see that Sarah Palin is still proving that when it comes to foreign affairs she doesn't even know who is and isn't an ally...
Read full story'Bloody Gestapo' claims as menstruating Norwegian women tagged with scarlet cuffs
Oslo - (On The Rag & Bloody Ass Mess): The comparison to mandatory Nazi tagging of Jews was perhaps inevitable. This week Norwegian women began their revolt over the latest bloody insult to their gender. The row erupted after pubic sector f...
Read full storyKardashian Credit Cards Don't Work
The Kardashians are slowly backing away from another failed business venture, and this time it is their prepaid credit card idea that is leading to some bad press. "I really thought the credit cards were a great idea, because I know that is prett...
Read full storyStacey Solomon Unveiled As A Spy On Wikileaks
Wikileaks' latest leak suggests that former X-Factor finalist and current I'm A Celeb heroine, Stacey Solomon has been employed by MI6 and kebab entrepreneur Ali Bullo, as a spy for months. MI6 remained tight lipped when Skoob Entertainment News a...
Read full storyBad sex literary prize goes to Rowan Somerville (not Mr.Bean or Jimmy), the author!
The bad sex literary prize has been awarded to the author Rowan Somerville (no relation either to celebrated gay singer Jimmy or Rowan as in Mr. Bean). This prestigious prize is awarded annually to authors who just cannot write about sex in a dece...
Read full storyGoogle claims EU investigation is invasion of privacy
Google has claimed a European Commission investigation into the company following complaints from other search engines could be in breach of the very privacy laws it circumvents with aplomb. The EC intends to examine whether the worlds largest se...
Read full storyPrince Andrew's Liver Salts Promotion
After his success in promoting British arrogance and stupidity abroad Prince Andrew has been offered a new post by the Coalition Government. He is to be an Ambassador Against Anguish (AAA), helping the British public swallow the bitter pill of auster...
Read full storyCameron to join England sqaud
David Cameron is to be in the England squad for their next European qualifier against Wales. He has already started training with the squad. "I want to be seen as a down to earth, man of the people prime minister" said the PM, over a fat ciga...
Read full storyDanielle Jonas: Kevin Prefers Brother's Company To Me!
Further trouble in paradise for Kevin Jonas as his wife, Danielle has recently told some of their friends that Kevin spends more time with his brothers that he does with her. "She told me that she was glad that the brothers had this closeness but...
Read full storySarah Palin Blames Toilet Paper Shortage in California on President Obama
The Sarah Palin Blame Game is revving up full steam ahead against anything remotely to do or not to do with this country's beleaguered President. Palin learned early on that taking swipes at the current administration is good for her public image eve...
Read full storyWagner Carrilho Rehearsing For Britain's Got Talent Auditions
Skoob Entertainment News has just learned that X-Factor reject novelty comedy singing act, Wagner Carrilho is wasting no time in letting the grass grow under his feet by rehearsing furiously for the upcoming series of Britain's Got Talent. Wacky W...
Read full storyThe Protractor and Angle beermats go on sale
The Protractor and Angle bar in Oxford has seen many famous luminaries pass through its doors in its thirty-five year history. Early on, it was clear that these luminaries were discussing many a deep and insightful topic over their lunchtime and even...
Read full storyShock New Ally in bid to make it Queen Camilla
Whacktivists are to undertake the largest campaign in misguided cause history, as they fight to save a London woman from being denied her rights in marriage. "This perhaps one of the gravest injustices of the past twenty minutes," sobbed national...
Read full storyYour Name In WikiLeaks
Only a small part of the WikiLeaks have been released but the rest are rumored to involve millions of private citizens. Have you been arrested in the past 15-20 years? Have you been afraid something would come out but you gave a sigh of relief whe...
Read full storyStudy Shows Organic Water May Be Toxic
Pittsburgh Organic Water bottling company, H2 uh-oh, sells consumers on the idea of "fresh water." Critics and scientists say this product may be too fresh. The water is served in a clear bottle however the end product has a tannish brown color w...
Read full storyLeak Fatigue
'Oh God, not more bloody leaks!' chimed the newsroom of a well known newspaper. 'It is bad enough getting the 5 million words from Wikileaks. Now we are getting coded messages from Spoof to work out. We can't afford to ignore any of this. When wil...
Read full storyFifa Fieves Fired
Following the BBC 'Panorama' programme on alleged corruption by FIFA executives the organisation has announced that all those named have no place in FIFA. Demands are being made to the individuals that they repay any money given to them to act corrup...
Read full storyMark Ruffalo on Terrorist Watchlist
Hollywood actor Mark Ruffalo has been added to a US terror advisory list after he promoted a documentary about the effects of natural gas drilling. Mark Ruffalo was placed on the US terror advisory watch list after he arranged screenings for the "Gasland" documentary which chronicles communities affected by a boom in natural gas drilling. In Pennsylvania the film, written and directed by J...
Read full storyMissing Miley Cyrus Song Discovered
HOLLYWOOD - A song that was recorded by Miley Cyrus but not included in an album has been leaked to this reporter. The song, entitled "Let's Dance", was planned to appear on Cyrus' 2008 album The Time of Our Lives but was replaced by "Party in the USA". Let's Dance! < accompanied by a thumping disco beat.> Hey, pilot, strapped in the seat, Don't you want to move your feet? Don't...
Read full storyX Factor Wagner Gagging Leads To New Career Move
While X Factor bosses have gone to extraordinary lengths to keep axed Wagner from talking about the show, they may have done him a favour. The wacky Brazilian was expected to appear on TV chat shows after being kicked off the show with Katie Waiss...
Read full storyWomen To Remain Banned From Close Combat
After conducting yet another exhaustive review, the Ministry of Defence has concluded that it will continue to ban women from frontline infantry units and close quarters combat. Women soldiers will continue in their current support roles, which ar...
Read full story5 Awesome Uses for Leftover Turkey Carcasses
Now that another Thanksgiving has come and gone and the last of the turkey meat is being picked from the carcass, you may be wondering if there is anything you can do with the carcass besides putting it in the trash. And the answer would be a resounding yes! Here are 5 awesome uses for that dried out leftover turkey carcass: 1. Use as a vessel for a birthday piñata. Real piñatas cost an arm...
Read full storyPrince Andrew Has Tourette's Says US Diplomat
A US diplomatic insider has revealed that colleagues in the State Department have been warned to be wary of Prince Andrew when they meet with him at functions. Documents shown to EIF News & Features reveal that several members of the US diplom...
Read full storyX-Factor's Katie Waissel Is Embarrassed To Learn That Her Sweet 81-Year-Old Granny Is A £250 Per Hour Hooker
LONDON - X-Factor's Katie Waissel has just received the shock of her life. She has learned from the media that her 81-year-old grandmother Shelia Vogel is self-employed as a £250 [$389 U.S.] per hour prostitute. Vogel, reportedly has been plying h...
Read full storyHistory Review (American Civil War): A World On Fire: An Epic History of Two Nations Divided, By Amanda Foreman
A huge history of the American Civil War (are there any brief ones?) by the author of the celebrated Georgiana, Duchess Of Devonshire. Looking for a present for the history buff in your life? Ken Lucid writes: Sorry I've been away for a while - been in Australia at a conference on the Anzacs (couldn't make it the same time as an Ashes test, could they? Idiots!) and have been snowed under her...
Read full storyDick Cheney Returns as "Dr. Strangelove" In Classic Movie Remake
Dick Cheney returns to the worlds spotlight this week as he appears in his first movie part- reprising the unforgettable Peter Sellers role of Dr. Strangelove in the remake of the Stanley Kubrik movie of the same name. Sellers made cinematic histo...
Read full storyHot Dog Vendors Scatter at Hollywood's Santa Parade
The police in Los Angeles have their hands full trying to control, those potentially dangerous, out of control illegal street vendors. Especially at The Hollywood Santa Parade. Eye witnessed, every 10 to 15 feet was another hot dog vendor. Well or...
Read full storyBrown to join Ashes cricket squad
London, England. The touring English cricket team, currently contesting a five test series against Australia, have sent an SOS to Gordon Brown, former PM of United Kingdom, to join the team as a replacement wicket keeper in case existing 'keeper Mat...
Read full storyTSA Agent Offended, Man Going, Ends Up Cumming
A TSA agent ended up with a hand full of goo when his fascination for shiny objects got the best of him. It started when a man headed to a flight was going through the scatter x-ray machine, bells and whistles went off and it apparently had the s...
Read full storyNot Enough Cock On The Spoof
Percy Phallus fancies himself as a bit of a spoofer. He currently writes on various blogs, as well as on the humour pages of the Scientology and Jehovah's Witness websites. For a while, Phallus has been feeling that things have been getting a litt...
Read full storyNew Enzime Reverses Aging,The God Drug Commith
An on going experiment conducted by Harvard University has developed an enzime that reverses the aging process in lab mice. Doctor Ronald DePinho's study may change the entire aging process worldwide, as well as the mind set for humans in regards...
Read full storyRemembering Leslie Nielsen. Seriously, I Don't Remember Him. Was He Famous?
Fans of actors from the golden age of television are mourning the death of Leslie Nielsen, some old f--ker that died on Sunday. "He was a comedic genius," said The Comedy Store owner Mitzi Shore, who nearly destroyed the entire stand-up comedy ind...
Read full storyWikileaks Leaks Wikis All over the Place
Wacky Wikis, Tacky Wikis, Secret Wikis, Stupid Wikis, if you can think of a Wiki, it is being leaked by Wikileaks at this very moment. No one is really sure why the founder of Wikileaks is taking it upon himself to be the number one truth peddler...
Read full storyObama Pleads with British Newscasters Please Pronounce My Name Correctly
According to Barack Obama's closest aides, the President has said more than once "If I hear my name mispronounced one more time by those British broadcasters, I'm going to have to go over there and kick some British butt." Obama, of course, is ref...
Read full storySwimming Pool Bans Flotation Aids On Elf & Safety Grounds
A local swimming pool has banned children's floats on grounds of health and safety. Following an incident where a young child almost choked, having taken a bite out of one of the polystyrene floats, the floats have now been removed from use. Pool...
Read full storyI'm A Celeb - Americans Just 'Don't Get' British Lavatory Humour
It seems Brits get it, but Americans don't. On last night's edition of 'I'm A Celeb', vacuous American (What was her mother thinking?) nude model Kayla Collins went off on one because 'somebody' had wallpapered the side of the dunny. With shit.
Read full storyWikiLeaks and so do Adult Diapers
Washington- The release of over 250,000 confidential and classified State Department cables has created a major embarrassment to the Administration. State Department lawyers were unsuccessful in their attempt to have WikiLeaks founder Julian Assinas...
Read full storyBlack Friday Bowel Movement Called Legendary
Supermart shoppers were treated to some fantastic bargains this Black Friday, but they never expected to be around greatness. Hank Newburg was with his wife and admits to overeating on the Thanksgiving holiday. "I ate so much turkey and stuffin...
Read full story271 Undiscovered Picasso's Under Dispute
A elderly couple have come forward with 271 unknown Picasso sketches, drawings and paintings. Pierre Le Guennec, 71, claims he purchased the works personally from Picasso. Le Guennec was Picasso's electrician for thirty years, he worked on three of P...
Read full storyBritney Spears Secrets More Enticing Than American Governments Secrets
The American Government is very upset that Wikileaks has released thousands of sensitive documents relating to The USSR, Iraq, Saddam Hussein, Saudi Arabia, and covert operations around the world among other things. Britney Spears is very upset th...
Read full storyQueen and Prince Philip to personally hang Christmas lights all over Windsor Castle; Prince of Wales and Camilla to pedal eco-bikes to provide power
HM The Queen and the Duke of Edinburgh are to climb fifty foot extension ladders in the first ever festooning of Windsor Castle with Christmas lights. In what is viewed as an expression of solidarity with a Berkshire man banned from lavishly deco...
Read full storyAccording To Wikileaks President Bush Had Quite A Crush On Condoleezza Rice
CHICAGO - Wikileaks is reporting that unnamed sources have just provided some inside reliable sources with several documents which clearly show that President George W. Bush had quite a crush on his secretary of state Condoleezza Rice. One of the...
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