Funny story: Ashley Tisdale Will Be Opening An Elementary School

Ashley Tisdale Will Be Opening An Elementary School

Ashley Tisdale is to open up a publicly funded elementary school in Needham, Massachusetts. Ashley Tisdale today announced plans to create a publicly funded elementary school, at a corporate board meeting in Massachusetts. The school will be par...
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Funny story: Paris Hilton May Have To Have Brain Transplant

Paris Hilton May Have To Have Brain Transplant

Only days after doctors told Paris Hilton to take it easy for awhile and try not to think of anything, especially anything stupid, they've come forward to say that tests show she is absolutely got to have a brain transplant as soon as possible and ar...
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Funny story: Chaz Bono, Matthew McConaughey Sighted Jogging Shirtless in Brentwood

Chaz Bono, Matthew McConaughey Sighted Jogging Shirtless in Brentwood

LOS ANGELES, CA - Sonny and Cher's sexually shape-shifting son and the Big Screen's brawny but brainless beef broker were spotted jogging along San Vicente Blvd near the Brentwood Country Club this morning, very sweaty and very bare-chested. Thoug...
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Funny story: Miley Cyrus 'BJ' Photo Analysis

Miley Cyrus 'BJ' Photo Analysis

Hollywood, CA - A photo of Miley Cyrus in an advanced state of undress and eating a banana and jam sandwich is likely real, according to an anonymous expert with the Center of Forensic Food Pathologists in Washington D.C. Said the source, "Analysi...
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Funny story: Fill in the ......... - YOU decide

Fill in the ......... - YOU decide

The ......... Party today announced new initiatives to ........ ........ in the British political ......... Prime Minister ......... ....... stated that the ........ scandal was not his ....... and should not be ...... against his ........ L...
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Funny story: Spoof Writer Accepts Gitmo Detainee Into SC Retirement Home!

Spoof Writer Accepts Gitmo Detainee Into SC Retirement Home!

Pawleys Island, SC/ Waccamaw Times - As a sign of tough economic times, a Struggling, Retired Spoof Writer, has agreed to accept a high profile Muslim Terrorist into his home in exchange for the standard $10m Tarp Terrorist Housing Fee offered by the...
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Funny story: Grey squirrels in protest shocker

Grey squirrels in protest shocker

Grey squirrels are seeking protection from ethnic cleansing in a new bid to establish immigration rights in the UK. It was emphatically not the Tufty Club. It was emphatically not Squirrel Nutkin. It was emphatically not the anti-split-infinitive...
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Funny story: Blue Ensign among the Hamptons

Blue Ensign among the Hamptons

Nevada - (Crossed Fingers Promise Keepers): Nevada Senator John Ensign completed a GOP tossers trifecta this week of Larry Craig (Ida Ho!) and David Vitter (Lousy-Anna) when his godly manhood was caught out shagging Senate colleague Douglas Hampton's...
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Funny story: Woody Allen Thinks Man Who Left Crap On Floor May Have Had Eboli Virus

Woody Allen Thinks Man Who Left Crap On Floor May Have Had Eboli Virus

With new cases of the Eboli Virus coming to light by the day overseas, actor/director Woody Allen is afraid that the man who rushed by him Tuesday night and ran into the bathroom, may have had the Eboli Virus but is afraid to mention it to the autho...
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Funny story: California Redwoods Chopped Down And Sold

California Redwoods Chopped Down And Sold

Death Valley CA-- If you were ever planning to visit the Redwood Forest in California, you better think again. The entire park of majestic redwoods is gone. The trees were sold to the Monsteranto Company by the governor for $.25 a tree. Governor T...
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Funny story: Dogs and Cats Are Better Than Kids

Dogs and Cats Are Better Than Kids

Dogs and Cats Are Better Than Kids Because They: (1) eat less, (2) don't ask for money all the time, (3) are easier to train, (4) normally come when called, (5) never ask to drive the car, (6) don't hang out with drug-using people; (7) don't smoke or drink, (8) don't want to wear your clothes, (9) don't have to buy the latest fashions, (10) don't need a gazillion dollars for college an...
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Funny story: Mexican Zombies Set To Enter Big Brother House

Mexican Zombies Set To Enter Big Brother House

Three new housemates are set to enter the Big Brother house tomorrow; but they aren't boring this time! Juan, Carlos, and Jose are set to the enter the house wearing poncho and sombrero and carryin maracas. But they won't become real housemates. T...
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Funny story: Fuel prices to fall to 50-year low

Fuel prices to fall to 50-year low

In a startling, but very welcome, disclosure the OPEC countries have announced that from now on, they will give away raw petroleum and deliver it free to refineries. This should ensure that full prices at the pump will fall to historic lows in a v...
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Funny story: Obama's fly - swatting TV antics revealed as a mega-spoof!

Obama's fly - swatting TV antics revealed as a mega-spoof!

Barack Obama caught sensationally swatting a fly whilst being interviewed on CNBC has now been revealed as a mega-spoof. Obama asked the CNBC especially to release a fly during the interview so as to enhance his "I'm as normal as the guy next door...
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Funny story: Citizens of Tehran, Los Angeles, Hold World Spanning Riot Fest

Citizens of Tehran, Los Angeles, Hold World Spanning Riot Fest

Los Angeles, CA - While citizens of Los Angeles celebrate the Los Angeles Lakers winning the NBA championship by rioting, citizens of Tehran, Iran continue to throw rocks at police and authority figures to demonstrate their anger towards a slanted el...
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Funny story: President Obama Names Chastity Bono To Head Up The Penal System

President Obama Names Chastity Bono To Head Up The Penal System

WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Barack Obama after meeting with Vice-President Joe Biden and the 'First Mama' Michelle has decided to name Chastity Bono, 40, to be the new executive director of the United states Penal Department. The president aware...
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Funny story: UK Brassed Off Over Waterboarding

UK Brassed Off Over Waterboarding

Tower of London, UK (FTB newswire) Visitors to the Tower of London are sure to be disappointed at the absence of the waterboarding display. The favorite attraction was axed after a protest from the U.S. Water boarding was known to be a favorite fo...
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Funny story: Man "Phasered" to Death at Sci-Fi Convention

Man "Phasered" to Death at Sci-Fi Convention

Baltimore, Maryland - A murder investigation began after a young man met his death yesterday at the twice yearly "SciFiAnnualCon" in Baltimore. His bloody body was found in a dumpster outside the conference center. He had been beaten with several rep...
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Funny story: David Letterman Offers To Adopt Willow Palin

David Letterman Offers To Adopt Willow Palin

NEW YORK CITY - In a move to show that he is really not the horrible animal that some people have painted him out to be David Letterman today reached out to Governor Sarah Palin and offered to adopt her 14-year-old daughter Willow Palin. The talk...
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Funny story: Sarah Palin forced to apologize

Sarah Palin forced to apologize

The Pitbulls United Society (PUS) is up in arms that Sarah Palin has forced Letterman to apologize about "joking" about her daughter. After all Sarah is the one who named her, could there be a worse joke? Anyway PUS now says that Sarah's previou...
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Funny story: Moto Gp Catalunya

Moto Gp Catalunya

MUGGED! What was Gorgeous George doing leaving that gap. I'm no gp rider but even I know you do not give the master the slightest sniff of a gap and expect him not to go for it. Rossi was clearly always going to do that, even if he was or wasn't in the way.... That is proper fairing bashing. Old skool racing, What a race. Those two aside, who wants to see Casey on a Repsol Honda or another '...
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Funny story: Obama Kills Fly During TV Interview - PETA Outraged

Obama Kills Fly During TV Interview - PETA Outraged

Washington, DC - As a result of President Obama executing a fly during a CNBC television interview, calls came in from the PETA organization, People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals, for the President's immediate resignation. "It's an outrage,...
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Funny story: Animal Activists protest Brooke Shields latest movie 'The Flu Lagoon'

Animal Activists protest Brooke Shields latest movie 'The Flu Lagoon'

New York, New York, New York, NY - Iconic actress Brooke Shields, 45, is about to release her latest movie, the long awaited sequel to her 1982 hit movie The Blue Lagoon, despite a wave of protest and controversy. The sequel, The Flu Lagoon, was f...
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Funny story: Lindsay Lohan topless pictures reveal gem implants

Lindsay Lohan topless pictures reveal gem implants

Pictures posted by Lindsay Lohan on her Twitter page show her naked from the waist up with only her long blonde hair covering her modesty. However, an eagle-eyed detective investigating an alleged gem theft has discovered what he claims are diamonds...
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Funny story: Iraq Cheese Sales Skyrocket

Iraq Cheese Sales Skyrocket

The sale of cheese from Iraq, named 'Iraq Cheese' has risen 450% in the last 3 months. Many believe the reason for this is the consumer's curiosity of what Iraq's cheese tastes like. Also the price is amazingly good value for money, at just £1.06...
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Funny story: Patrick Farrow: frantic search for Hutchence/Carradine-style auto-asphyxiation paraphernalia

Patrick Farrow: frantic search for Hutchence/Carradine-style auto-asphyxiation paraphernalia

Castleton, Vermont - (RIP Mess): Conspiracy winguts are trawling cyberspace for the merest hint of 'silken ropes' and/or 'anal nightrate' following the suspicious death at a Vermont gallery today of Mia Farrow's sculptor brother Patrick. Farrow, 6...
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Funny story: Sarah Palin's Non-Nude Political Plan

Sarah Palin's Non-Nude Political Plan

WASILLA, Alaska - Governor Sarah Palin confided to her next door neighbor Twilla Tallygaroopna that her and husband Todd's political plan worked like a charm. The governor confessed that she will not have to end up posing nude in PlayMale Magazin...
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Funny story: Leaked Document Shows Brown's B.A.P.S.

Leaked Document Shows Brown's B.A.P.S.

Prime Minister Gordon Brown is the centre of more controversy today about his radical plans to cure the UK's recession. In a document found attached to the back of a stray dog, there has been strong evidence to show Mr Brown setting up a group cal...
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Funny story: Rihanna Being Sued, Twice!

Rihanna Being Sued, Twice!

According to several stories on the internet, Rihanna is being sued at least twice, perhaps three times. It's getting hard to keep up. In one case, she is being sued by Manu Dibango for using part of his licensed song, "Soul Makossa" whom he had g...
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Funny story: Rottweiler adopts abandoned talk show host, Jay Leno

Rottweiler adopts abandoned talk show host, Jay Leno

Los Angeles, CA - A rottweiler belonging to a part-time Beverly Hills pool cleaner and illegal alien, Alberta Quinones, has adopted former Tonight Show host, Jay Leno. "My dog Murphy," said Quinones, "..is very protective. Once a little child trie...
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Funny story: Inquiry of Enquiries

Inquiry of Enquiries

Were there WMDs or was Britain maliciously duped into a war on the premise of sweets, love, puppies and global peace? Fortunately we will now be able to read about it in six months time as the UK government will be performing an inquiry into the...
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Funny story: Major Antonius Julius Argus Xerxes Part-7

Major Antonius Julius Argus Xerxes Part-7

o You look very angry. o Do you know why I am angry? o No, Sir. o You deceived my uncle, right on that boulder, Yusef; do you remember him? o Now, I do, sir. For the same reason I would like for you to have me. o Will that suffice? o Of course, not. Your uncle lost his flock. o What was your share? o Nothing, Sir. I am a whore. They have hired me to do the job. I get a fixed pay. How coul...
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Funny story: Manchester United will spend Ronaldo £80 million 'on chocolate'

Manchester United will spend Ronaldo £80 million 'on chocolate'

In a surprise announcement today, Manchester United revealed how they intended to spend the money generated by Ronaldo's move to Real Madrid. Many fans, though, will be disappointed by exactly how that money will be used. Rather than buy a replac...
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Funny story: Igor Stravinsky conducts FreeBird on YouTube

Igor Stravinsky conducts FreeBird on YouTube

To celebrate Igor Stravinsky's birthday, his estate has released a previously unseen film of the renowned Russian composer conducting a performance of FreeBird performed in 1971 by Lynyrd Skynyrd and the Berlin Philharmonic Orchestra. The film has...
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Funny story: Swine Flu now reaches 81

Swine Flu now reaches 81

Swine Flu in Pertia has now reached 81 victims. The second last case discovered was a 7 year old Grade 1 student who smokes cigarettes. He felt a little sick with a cough yesterday and stayed home from school. He got a vaccine and then the sympto...
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Funny story: Maddie: were MPs' expense claims to blame?

Maddie: were MPs' expense claims to blame?

The scandal of MPs' extravagant expenses took a new twist last night when it was suggested that the claims made by MPs may have contributed to the abduction of Madeleine McCann. The Daily Telegraph has published new information that shows that Edw...
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Funny story: Ayatollah Kakamami Names Dick Cheney to Iranian Presidency

Ayatollah Kakamami Names Dick Cheney to Iranian Presidency

Iran's election crisis with accusations of stolen votes, butterflied ballots and much bull shiite has brought throngs of protesters to the streets and Iranian women throwing off their burqas to display Victorian not-so-secret thongs for all the mulla...
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Funny story: Lebron Eats Kobe Beef

Lebron Eats Kobe Beef

A monumental wager between the LA Laker's leader Kobe Bryant and the Cleveland Cavalier's superstar, Lebron James brought suddemly not so cavalier Sir James to his knees on the walk of fame in front of Grauman's Chinese in the City of the Angels. Leb...
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Funny story: Joaquin Phoenix Hired To Be The Fifth American Idol Judge

Joaquin Phoenix Hired To Be The Fifth American Idol Judge

HOLLYWOOD - The producers of American Idol Carole King and Neil Sedaka have just announced that they are adding a fifth judge for the upcoming ninth season of American Idol. Sedaka stated that an American Idol committe made up of 20 individuals in...
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Funny story: Obama The Fly Killer

Obama The Fly Killer

WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Barack Obama showed once again that no one or nothing is gonna mess with the President of the United States. The president was being interviewed by Sports Illustrated's Ellis "Spitball" Appleyard when a fly started fly...
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Funny story: Swine Flu Virus Created In US Lab As Part Of Weapons Research

Swine Flu Virus Created In US Lab As Part Of Weapons Research

A retired government scientist has made an extraordinary allegation that the Swine Flu virus, H1N1, is the result of genetic testing that went disastrously wrong at a US research laboratory in Georgia. The man, Reginald Dwyer, 68, worked at the US...
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Funny story: Angelina Jolie and Adam Lambert To Star With Ron Jeremy in "Digital Switchover"

Angelina Jolie and Adam Lambert To Star With Ron Jeremy in "Digital Switchover"

HOLLYWOOD - Angelina Jolie and Adam Lambert will be appearing with Ron Jeremy in Bandini Borrapelli's production of Digital Switchover. The movie takes place in Brentwood, California. Lambert and Jeremy star as TV cable repairmen Billy Yastremski...
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Funny story: SFB Virus Declared a Pandemic

SFB Virus Declared a Pandemic

Washington DC: The heinous three murders committed recently in Kansas, Arkansas and Washington DC by three deranged individuals has led the National Institutes of Health (NIH) to examine if a shared pathogen is the cause of these hate crimes. NIH...
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