Elton John Carried Offstage In Copenhagen After Watford FA Cup Annihilation
Sir Elton John had to be helped off the stage during a concert in Copenhagen last night, as updates he was receiving about the scoreline from the FA Cup final match at Wembley Stadium between Watford and Manchester City were making him more and more...
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Pep Guardiola Told That Manchester City Must Improve If He Is To Keep His Job
Pep Guardiola, Manchester City's Spanish coach, has been warned by the club's owners that his future is 'in the balance', and the team must show a significant improvement next year if he wants to keep his job. Guardiola has brought unprecedented b...
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Pep Guardiola Had 'A Lump In His Throat' For Watford At Final Whistle
Victorious Manchester City coach, Pep Guardiola, has said he had a lump in his throat "the size of a Seville orange" at the end of the FA Cup final, after his team had trounced underdogs, Watford, 6-0 at Wembley Stadium. City outclassed the Hornet...
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Noel Gallagher And Elton John To Record Live Wembley Album Before FA Cup Final
Two Titans of the music world, Sir Elton Hercules John and Mr. Noel Gallagher, have agreed to come together to record a live album in front of the 100,000 crowd at Wembley Stadium, before this season's FA Cup final between their respective favourite...
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Trump A Busted Flush In UK Premiership Football Club Scam
London, UK - (Offside Mess): Mighty property mogul Donald J Trump failed miserably in an attempted 2014 ‘compulsory purchase’ plan to take over a top flight UK Premier League club, a former linesman said today. The scam started with a fake bankers...
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Gareth Bale To Dispense With 'Man Bun'
Gareth Bale, the Real Madrid footballer who is looking for a new club to play for after rumours that the Spanish giants are to replace him, is to have his 'man bun' removed, and face the music of baldness. The Welshman has used the stick-on dollop...
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Champions League Place Contenders Couldn't Be Arsed
Manchester United Manager Ole Gunnar Solskjaer Sacked
Premier League Title Race Is So Exciting, That Fans Are Literally 'Touching Cloth'
Football Gossip: Mike Dean's 100 Red Cards, Celtic Prophylactic, Scotland Women, Togolese Referee Innocent
Football Gossip: Pogba Apprenticeship, Sun and Sangria, Gone in 39 Seconds, Not Maureen, Carroll Injury?
Pep Guardiola Is Not A Fan Of Man Buns
Carlos Tevez Exclusive - "I Will Never Play For Manchester City Again...Ever"
A Millwall Brick: How To Make One
Team of Man United Scientists Claim Anfield Is “Not A Special Place”
Between A Rock And A fun Place
Ole Gunnar Solskjaer Success Proves Managing Manchester United Job Is The Easiest In Football
Tranmere Rovers Fans Pissed At LGBT Spat
David Beckham Has More Points In The Last Month Than Manchester United
Manchester United's disappointing season finally comes to a close this weekend, with the news that former player, David Beckham, has picked up more points in the last month than they have. Beckham, 44, picked up six points at Bromley Magistrates C...
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Someone At Uthiefa Got Massive Bung For Insane Baku Pick
London, UK - (Offside Rule): Football fans are rightly pissed at an insane Uthiefa decision to host this year’s cup final in crappy Baku. Azerbaijan’s capital city lies in a part of Western Asia best known for its lack of airport. Or a fixed runw...
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Delia Smith Is Going To Bake A Special Cake To Celebrate Norwich City Being Promoted
TV celebrity cook, Delia Smith, is to bake a special celebration cake for the players and staff of Norwich City after the Championship team secured promotion to the Premier League. Norwich is in Norfolk. Smith, 77, who has been a supporter of t...
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Subbuteo Football Player Sustains Career-Threatening Injury
FLASHBACK ON THIS DAY 45 YEARS AGO A talented footballer's career is hanging in the balance this evening, after a horror injury that will rule him out for at least the rest of the season, and possibly the rest of his life. Number 9 was playi...
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Solskjaer Stance On Parking Spaces Hints At Concrete Future For United
It seems that retiring a player's shirt is no longer enough. Now you have to retire their car parking space too. That is the world created by Ole Gunnar Solskjaer in what will probably be his most telling contribution as Manchester United manager.
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Elton John FA Cup Final Performance Offer Snubbed
Sir Elton Hercules John, the popular singer, who has millions of fans worldwide, has offered his services as pre-match entertainment at this year's FA Cup final between his beloved Watford, and Manchester City, at Wembley Stadium in May, but has been...
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Danny Rose Has Spoken Out On Racism
Danny Rose, the Tottenham Hotspur and England footballer, who has been the victim, on several occasions, of racist abuse from fans, has spoken out about his feelings about how racism is perceived, and says he "can't wait to see the back of football".
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All Foreign Born Premier League Footballers Required to Leave England in New Brexit Deal
London - A new Brexit Deal offered up by Prime Minister Theresa May would require all expat Premier League participants to leave their England and Wales-based squads for other clubs in Europe, the Americas and China, and require all British players t...
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Barcelona Misery Total After Team Bus Was 'Up On Bricks'
"It never rains but it pours", is the way the old saying goes, and it was never more true than on Tuesday night at Anfield, when the Barcelona football team, humiliated and dumped out of the Champions League by Liverpool, emerged from the stadium for...
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Manchester City now too expensive to hate fans admit
Due to accounting irregularities currently under investigation by UEFA, it has been revealed that Manchester Cty are now the most expensive club in the world for fans to hate and revile. From next season, the average cost of just going to a match...
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Notts County, The Oldest Football Club In The World, Drop Through The 'Trap Door'
Notts County, the founderest founding member of the Football League in 1888, were relegated out of it on Saturday, and will spend next season playing in the National League. The Magpies, 157, finished in the play-off positions in season 2017/18, b...
Read full storyFunny Football (Soccer) Headlines
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Football Association To Award FA Cup To Manchester United After Goal Gaff!
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Cristiano Ronaldo Awarded Freedom Of Manchester Gay Quarter
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Manchester United's Chicharito Shocked By Girlfriend Shakira's Brand New 'Bikini Line' Tattoo
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Lionel Messi has a gigantic cock
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Duncan Disorderly - Physio Sangster's Antics Astound
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England Football Fans Beg Team Not to Win World Cup
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Football Gossip: Brendan Rodgers "I was halfway home", Larne FC "Champions League", Mourinho Team Building
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Doncaster Rovers Totally Outclassed By Cultured Crystal Palace
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Lack Of Trophies
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I Don't Make Excuses
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The Adventures Of Anton Ferdinand And His Expensive Daft Watch
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Chelsea Sell Trophy Cabinet
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Arsene gives up on youth strategy
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Rafa Benitez Sacked
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Wales to get World Cup following successful Ryder Cup spell
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John Terry's face being used on Indian cigarette packets
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Harry Redknapp rushed to hospital in transfer window 'slam shut' drama
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Football Gossip: West Ham Women, Abramovich Cash, Clarke's Kilmarnock Faux Pas, Mourinho vs. Pogba
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New Year's Honours List Did Not Include Roy Larner
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