Where are they now? Forbes Phillipson-Masters, Southampton Footballer

Written by Paxton Quigley

Monday, 28 January 2019

image for Where are they now? Forbes Phillipson-Masters, Southampton Footballer
"Mr. Carson, bring me my football boots, a bottle of my best champagne and a serving wench"

Actually, that's Forbes Ernest Phillipson-Masters, probably the poshest footballer name ever. Eat your hearts out, Jadons and Jermaines.

Phillipson-Masters was born in Bournemouth, and originally signed with Southampton as an apprentice goalkeeper in August 1972, but was given a free transfer by Lawrie McMenemy. Saints' youth team coach then persuaded Forbes to try his luck as a centre-half. The conversion was successful, and, after playing nine times for the Saints first team, and spending spells on loan to Exeter City, A.F.C. Bournemouth and Luton Town, Phillipson-Masters was sold to Plymouth Argyle for £50,000 in 1979, where he was to make over a hundred league appearances. He went on to Bristol City, where he made nearly another hundred, before winding up his career with a season with Yeovil Town.

In 1987, he moved into non-League football management in the Dorset area, and now has his own building company in Dorset.

This name sounds as if it comes straight from Downton Abbey and belongs to somebody who should be playing for Old Carthusians. I still remember hearing Motty announcing the teamsheet on MOTD and thinking "WTF?"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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