Funny story: Christmas Sales To Start On Christmas Day

Christmas Sales To Start On Christmas Day

Christmas bargain hunters will not have quite as long to wait for their 'Christmas bargains' this year, after businesses voted overwhelmingly to throw open their doors to customers at 6am on 25 December. The move comes as high-street traders try t...

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Funny story: Amazon To Lay Off Staff As Pre-Christmas 'Rush' Doesn't Happen

Amazon To Lay Off Staff As Pre-Christmas 'Rush' Doesn't Happen

Amazon, the online shopping retailer, has said that it is facing being forced to make staff at its distribution centers redundant, as online sales for Christmas have fallen way below expected targets. Sales of goods are 28% down on those in the fi...

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Funny story: Hotel Had Perfectly Good Reason To Reject Homeless People

Hotel Had Perfectly Good Reason To Reject Homeless People

A hotel in Hull that cancelled the Christmas holiday booking of some of its rooms, after initially agreeing to the booking, claims it had a perfectly good reason to do so. The Royal Hotel in Hull initially accepted a booking by the Hull Homeless a...

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Funny story: President Trump Christmas Album Out Thursday

President Trump Christmas Album Out Thursday

US President Donald Trump has, this morning, revealed in a tweet that he is to break into the music industry "with a purpose" by releasing a Christmas album that is available from Thursday. The album features various Trump speeches recorded over t...

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Funny story: Man Begrudgingly Went To Xmas Party, But Ended Up Being The Life And Soul Of It

Man Begrudgingly Went To Xmas Party, But Ended Up Being The Life And Soul Of It

An office clerk in New York who was not in the right frame of mind to enjoy himself at the firm's annual Christmas party, eventually gave in to the overwhelming pressure of his friends and went along. Ed Reeperbahn, 26, an accountant at Stronk and...

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Funny story: Modern-Day Scrooge: "Enjoy Your Last Christmas, Suckers!"

Modern-Day Scrooge: "Enjoy Your Last Christmas, Suckers!"

BOSTON, MA, CHRISTMAS DAY -- Archibald C. Reilly III, born to a wealthy North Carolina family of tobacco barons in 1932, has spent his eighty-six years on this Earth with the single-minded purpose of accruing a vast amount of wealth. Through a long s...

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Funny story: Father Christmas Killed in Tragic Sleigh Accident, Say Cash-Strapped Parents

Father Christmas Killed in Tragic Sleigh Accident, Say Cash-Strapped Parents

St Nicholas, the jovial and benevolent bearer of Christmas gifts died when his custom-made sleigh collided with a Jumbo Jet just outside the North Pole, newly-impoverished parents reported to their children yesterday. The man more commonly known a...

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Funny story: Trump's Jerusalem victory will turn the tide in the war on Christmas

Trump's Jerusalem victory will turn the tide in the war on Christmas

The war on Christmas is eternal, and will only be won when Jesus Christ himself returns and everyone in the world is dead. Today that glorious day came a step closer when Donald Trump effectively reclaimed Jerusalem as the capital of Christianity, pr...

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Funny story: Trump tweets Christmas wishlist

Trump tweets Christmas wishlist

US Presdient, Donald Trump, has tweeted his wish list for Santa Claus. The tweet, in full, reads: "Deere SATAN: I been the best Presdunt ever. I only want 3 things this ear: 1. To be as TALL as leaking James Comey 2. As SEXY and H...

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Funny story: Man Got Drunk, Sat In A Wheelbarrow, And Cried For His Mommy

Man Got Drunk, Sat In A Wheelbarrow, And Cried For His Mommy

Christmas isn't always a happy time, and, for some people, it can be a period of downright misery. This was the case with one man on Christmas Day, when the pressure of his work, the failure of his relationship, and the alienation and isolation of be...

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Funny story: Megyn Kelly Says That Half of Santa's Elves Are Gay

Megyn Kelly Says That Half of Santa's Elves Are Gay

NEW YORK CITY - FOX News reporter Megyn Kelly not content with her pervious controversial comments has now stated that she knows for a fact that half of Santa's elves are gay. The 43-year-old reporter was asked by American Spotlight Magazine's Fit...

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Funny story: Santa's In Trouble; Caught Singing "Baby, It's Cold Outside"

Santa's In Trouble; Caught Singing "Baby, It's Cold Outside"

It's cold INSIDE, too, in many quarters for poor Santa, since some MeToo-ers have declared the song suggestive and deserving of being banned from the airwaves. Many of those who sing it are being relegated to the doghouse. But Santa is defiant, st...

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Funny story: Busy Times for Three Spirits

Busy Times for Three Spirits

The Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present, and Christmas yet to come have admitted that 2008 has proven to be a far busier year than they were expecting. A Mr Marley, dragging his chains behind him told us: 'In my time, it was easier for them. There w...

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Funny story: Why not take your Christmas tree on holiday?

Why not take your Christmas tree on holiday?

WHOPEE!! It's summer holidays again --- pack the suitcases, cancel the milk, take the dog to the kennels - big sigh of relief! Everything done and dusted! All set for fun and sun --- But wait a minute! Haven't we forgotten something?...

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Funny story: Yes, Santa Claus, There Still Are A Few Virgins

Yes, Santa Claus, There Still Are A Few Virgins

Dear Ask Jeeves.Com, Some of my Elf employees say that there are no more Virgins. My wife says that if I use your computer answer service, and it tells me that there are, it is so. Please tell me the truth; are there still Virgins?" Santa Claus 1 Main Street North Pole Santa, Your little Elf friends are wrong. They have been affected by the callousness and skepticism and negativ...

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Funny story: Santa Claus Loses Job, Blames Scrooge

Santa Claus Loses Job, Blames Scrooge

"A pox on their house," was the reaction of Mr. Claus when he found out he wouldn't be hired by one Midwestern town in the U. S. this year. He controlled his language in consideration of Mrs. Claus, who was standing at his side when he got the news.

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Funny story: A Black Man's View of U.S. Holidays

A Black Man's View of U.S. Holidays

Ogres, gargoyles, sorcerers, fairies, gremlins, trolls, elves, goblins, leprechauns, vampires, ghosts, unicorns, centaurs, werewolves, Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, Frankenstein, the Easter Bunny, the Hamburglar, wicked witches, Martians, the Grinch, the Sand Man and the Grim Reaper. All are bunk creations, but no worse than fortunetellers, radio psychologists, TV Evangelists, numerologists, Tarot...

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Funny story: Christmas Past, Christmas Last

Christmas Past, Christmas Last

In a move hailed as a bold modernisation of community life the European Union has issued a directive cancelling future occurrences of Christmas.

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Funny story: Pogues Christmas Hit 'Fairytale Of New York' Comes Onto LGBT Radar

Pogues Christmas Hit 'Fairytale Of New York' Comes Onto LGBT Radar

Christmas, the time of year when families get together and celebrate, and love and happiness is shared throughout the community, is almost upon us once again, and, to mark this festive season, the LGBT community is demanding that The Pogues song, 'Fa...

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Funny story: Santa Claus Hates Mince Pies

Santa Claus Hates Mince Pies

On the eve of the most widely-celebrated Christian festival of the year, the main focal point of the event, Santa Claus, has spoken out about one of the things he hates most about it - mince pies. Parents of young children everywhere have, down th...

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