Governor Andrew Cuomo The New Sex Symbol
With his knowledgeable understanding of coronavirus as seen during his daily press briefing, New York Governor Andrew Cuomo has become The Nation's Governor, easily surpassing Rudolph Giuliani’s 9/11 title of The Nation's Mayor. Much to Giuliani’s...
Read full storyHome of Middle-Class Family is Inexplicably Cold
Middle-class families are living in primitive, near-hypothermic conditions all year round, it has emerged. In a Spoof exclusive, we investigate the stark and tragic world of middle-class families willfully living in homes which would be deemed to...
Read full storyBillingsgate Archives: One Nut Away From Having A Chipmunk In White House
BILLINGSGATE POST: The below article appeared in the September 2004 edition of the prestigious BILLINGSGATE JOURNAL, for which it received the coveted Bulshitzer Prize. Perhaps some of the current readers and contributors to The Spoof are not awar...
Read full storyNashville Man Successfully Overcomes Fear and Despair
Caleb Bonner of Nashville, Tennessee, knew he was at a critical juncture. A barrage of news about mass pandemics, dubious politics, and an increasingly unlivable planet had left him wondering whether life was even worth living. Was there any point in...
Read full storyOscillating Fan Has Stopped Oscillating
An oscillating fan that was bought around seven years ago, and has worked perfectly well since then, providing whole-room coverage day and night, has chosen this morning to stop its oscillatory activity, and now only points in one direction. The...
Read full storyBrexit Party celebrates end of freedom of movement
It's what 17.4 million people voted for, according to party leader, Nigel Farage, and it has arrived at last. Coronavirus has achieved what the politicians could not do - completely ended freedom of movement. "It's fantastic news!" said Farage. "I...
Read full storyPresident Trump Has Noticed A Similarity Between The Words 'Panic' And 'Pandemic'
It's been reported from the White House in the last few minutes, that President Donald Trump has become aware of a distinct similarity between two very popular words in circulation at the moment - 'panic' and 'pandemic'. According to reliable sour...
Read full storyTrump and Dr. Fauci Get Into a Hellacious Shouting Match After The C-19 Press Conference
WASHINGTON, D.C. – Dr. Anthony Fauci is the highly-respected director of the National Institute of Allery and Infectious Diseases. Donald Johnny Trump is the electoral college president, and pretty much self-proclaimed King of the United States.
Read full storyResidents of Corona, California Want The City’s Name Changed
CORONA, California – A vast majority of the citizens of this quaint California town, where Emperor Hirohito was allegedly born, have asked the mayor and the city council to change the name of the city. One resident, Billy Bobby Millwinkle, said th...
Read full storyMexico Has Mandated That All Bullfighters Will Now Be Required To Wear Raincoats In The Bullring
MEXICO CITY – Mexico’s Federation of Bullfighters has just issued a directive that came about due to the Coronavirus. Fernando “Pee-Wee “ Caballo, spokesperson for the FB, said that, by a 7 to 3 vote, every matador who performs in Mexico will now...
Read full storyThieves Break Into A Toilet Paper Warehouse and Make off With 9,000 Rolls
MILWAUKEE – Local authorities are reporting that overnight thieves broke into the Charmin Warehouse located on Soft Street and made off with 9,000 rolls of toilet paper. Surveillance cameras captured the three thieves who were dressed as Milwaukee...
Read full storyA Connecticut Couple Arrested For Not Sheltering In Place
NAUGATUCK, Connecticut – An elderly couple, who are both in their late 80s, have been taken into custody by Naugatuck police officers. Officer Flint Summersun informed the media that had assembled at a local duck pond, that the two octogenarians,...
Read full storyEastenders: Queen Vic Given Special Dispensation To Stay Open During Coronavirus Pandemic
Prime Minister Boris Johnson may have spoken to the nation, and laid down the law telling people to stay at home during the Coronavirus crisis, with all pubs and clubs to shut, but, for one public house, in particular, this arrangement will not apply...
Read full storyMan Gets Trapped Between Train And Platform
A man who tried to avoid paying for a train ticket, and then had to take evasive action as the train's conductor arrived, had to be rescued, after falling from the vehicle, and becoming trapped between it and the station platform where it had come to...
Read full storyFrom The Archives Of Dr. Billingsgate
BILLINGSGATE POST: I have decided to unveil some of my earlier work as a young crack reporter with THE BILLINGSGATE JOURNAL beginning in 2005. As you can see, I had access to some of biggest political players in America. The following are excerpts...
Read full storyMan's Hands Are The Cleanest In Southeast Asia
A man who has taken to an extreme, the governments advice to constantly keep hands clean, and wash them at every opportunity, has said that his hands are currently the cleanest in southeast Asia. Moys Kenwood, 56, who used to be a teacher until hi...
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