There were 448 spoof news stories published in June 2013. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.

Chicharito Says He'll Probably Give Up Soccer and Move To America If His Girlfriend Cheryl Cole Gets The X-Factor Job

Funny story: Chicharito Says He'll Probably Give Up Soccer and Move To America If His Girlfriend Cheryl Cole Gets The X-Factor Job

LOS ANGELES - Cheryl Cole has made it perfectly clear that her number one priority right now is to do whatever it takes to get that coveted judge's slot on Simon Cowell's X-Factor. Cheryl has said that she has never been happier than she is now th...

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Red Panda Explains Timeout from the National Zoo

Funny story: Red Panda Explains Timeout from the National Zoo

On Monday morning when Rusty, the red panda (he looks sort of like a raccoon) was reported missing, many assumed that he was displeased with his accommodations at the National Zoo in Wash., DC. Not so. To counteract the incorrect assumption, once Rusty was returned to the zoo later in the day, he contacted a reporter at TheSpoof.com, Gail Farrelly (she's an expert in panda parlance), to...

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Chicharito Says Cheryl Cole Has The Sexiest Body He Has Ever Seen

Funny story: Chicharito Says Cheryl Cole Has The Sexiest Body He Has Ever Seen

LOS ANGELES - Chicharito, who is a native of Mexico, was in L.A. visiting his girlfriend Cheryl Cole. Cole was meeting with the entertainment mogul Simon Cowell about the possibility of her taking the place of Britney Spears at the X-Factor judges...

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NASA Sued by Bachelor Rat on Mars

Funny story: NASA Sued by Bachelor Rat on Mars

As soon as the news surfaced that a rat (of the rodent, not human, variety) had been photographed on Mars, Science and Technology reporter Gail Farrelly at The Spoof.com knew she had to be the first to interview him. "Thank goodness for Skype," Farr...

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Twitter Birdies Take Over Word TWEET, Real Birds Furious

Funny story: Twitter Birdies Take Over Word TWEET, Real Birds Furious

The "takeover" is a done deal. And "real" birds (y'know the kind that chirp outside your window and poop on the windshield of your car) are all aflutter. As reported by a reporter who understands bird talk and listened in on their conversation,...

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NY State Unemployment Benefits Collected by Dead People

Funny story: NY State Unemployment Benefits Collected by Dead People

It's the gift that keeps on giving. Even after death. Word is that officials will be trying to get the money back. Huh? Retrieval from The Great Beyond? Lotsa luck with that one! This situation intrigued reporter Gail Farrelly, so she went to a NYS unemployment benefits office and interviewed applicants waiting in line to see what they thought of this news. Here's what some of them s...

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Chimps Demand Retirement Party

Funny story: Chimps Demand Retirement Party

It happened as soon as the National Institutes of Health announced this week that "...310 chimps will be retiring from medical research over the next few years..." One of the chimps said, "Throwing us a party, it's the least they can do, we've put in our time." And the chimps weren't at all shy about exactly what kind of a party it should be. Here are a few of the things they demanded: --...

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Big Brother Is Watching Too Much, Way Too Much

Funny story: Big Brother Is Watching Too Much, Way Too Much

He's seen it all, and he's sick of it. The beleaguered watchdog is having trouble keeping up with the amount of work he's been assigned and admits it may be time for him to quit his spying job. The number of folks he's supposed to keep track of...

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JFK Airport Security Guards Justify Workday Naps

Funny story: JFK Airport Security Guards Justify Workday Naps

Confronted with the evidence (photos of napping on the job), the security guards had a variety of responses about their behavior, when interviewed by reporter Gail Farrelly from TheSpoof.com. Here's a sample: -- "I catch a few winks during the slow hours, so that I'm ready to be extra vigilant during the busy ones." -- "Sleeping isn't allowed on the job? Really? I have to check this...

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George Orwell Returns from the Dead to Sell More Books

Funny story: George Orwell Returns from the Dead to Sell More Books

Commuters at Grand Central Station received the shock of a lifetime last night: George Orwell selling and signing copies of his books, right near the big clock in the terminal. "Ya gotta strike while the iron is hot," Orwell told the crowd, e...

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So Far It Looks Like Michael Jackson Has Done A Pretty Good Job Faking His Death

Funny story: So Far It Looks Like Michael Jackson Has Done A Pretty Good Job Faking His Death

Nearly fours years after faking his own death many observers, commentators and journalists are praising the former "King of Pop" for his tenacity and determination in continuing his ruse, with some calling Jackson "the best in the business". "I ca...

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Chicharito Confesses That Girlfriend Cheryl Cole Wants To Have His Baby

Funny story: Chicharito Confesses That Girlfriend Cheryl Cole Wants To Have His Baby

CABO SAN LUCAS, Mexico - The jet-setting couple Javier Hernández Balcázar, AKA Chicharito and his girlfriend singer Cheryl Cole flew into Cabo San Lucas, Mexico's General Antonio Lopez de Santa Ana Airport. The happy couple was then driven by limo...

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PETA Wants To Ban Animal Crackers

Funny story: PETA Wants To Ban Animal Crackers

NORFOLK, Virginia - The People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals have gone to Congress to state their case regarding the wanton ingesting of animal crackers throughout America. PETA's Executive Director Mimosa Ledbetter told the news media that...

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The CIA Trying To Find A Way To Destroy Hurricanes While They're Still Out In The Ocean

Funny story: The CIA Trying To Find A Way To Destroy Hurricanes While They're Still Out In The Ocean

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Well Hurricane season is upon us once again and Andrea is the first big old windbag to make an appearance. President Obama, still dealing with the damage and destruction that befell the East Coast last year from Hurricane Sandy,...

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Political Facebook - President Obama, Vice-President Biden, and That Infamous Super Bowl Ring

Funny story: Political Facebook - President Obama, Vice-President Biden, and That Infamous Super Bowl Ring

POLITICAL FACEBOOK Vice-President Biden: Hello Mr. President, are you there? 8:01 a.m. President Obama: Good morning to you Joey. How are things going so far? 8:04 a.m. Vice-President Biden: Pretty good Barry. Say have you heard anymore concerning that New England Patriots Super Bowl Ring that Vladimir Putin reportedly stole? 8:07 a.m. President Obama: Well Joey, kinda, sorta, I gue...

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Maker of PC-Matic Computer Utility Sued For Double Charging Actress

Funny story: Maker of PC-Matic Computer Utility Sued For Double Charging Actress

PC-Matic, a computer utility that promises to be all things to all computers has recently blanketed television with its ads. In the most recent ad, a tall, bald technician hands a female client an invoice for $300 for repairing her slow, virus-infes...

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Mick Jagger of The Rolling Stones Talks About His Groupies

Funny story: Mick Jagger of The Rolling Stones Talks About His Groupies

DETROIT - Mick Jagger flew to Detroit to see about a business deal that his guitarist Keith Richards had told him about. While he was in the Land of The Tigers, Lions, Pistons, and Red Wings, he was asked by Pico de Gallo with Tittle Tattle Tonigh...

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Nina Dobrev Talks About Her Upcoming Nude Shower Scene In The Vampire Diaries

Funny story: Nina Dobrev Talks About Her Upcoming Nude Shower Scene In The Vampire Diaries

LOS ANGELES - The ratings for the television series The Vampire Diaries have been very good and they are fixing to get even better. The show's producer Manolo Middlezuck has just announced that an upcoming episode promises to send the ratings thro...

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Nina Dobrev of The Vampire Diaries Reveals Her Fetish

Funny story: Nina Dobrev of The Vampire Diaries Reveals Her Fetish

BEVERLY HILLS - The star of The Vampire Diaries, Nina Dobrev attended a bachelorette party for a close friend at The Mrs. Ponce De Leon Hotel in Beverly Hills. Dobrev said that she went to high school with the guest of honor, Delilah "Third Base"...

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U.S. Politicos: Where Are They Now?

Funny story: U.S. Politicos: Where Are They Now?

Faded Spotlight Magazine Presents... U.S. POLITICOS: WHERE ARE THEY NOW? Mitt Romney - The old Flip-Flopper, who got trounced in the 2012 presidential election by President Barack Obama, is seriously considering moving down to Mexico and living with one of his cousins who owns a piñata factory. Ron Paul - The 77-year-old congressman from Texas is living in the Lone Star state and trying t...

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Chicharito and Cheryl Cole Purchase Rihanna's Nudist Resort

Funny story: Chicharito and Cheryl Cole Purchase Rihanna's Nudist Resort

WEST HOLLYWOOD - The Caribbean singer, Rihanna, 25, has just sold The Naked As A Jaybird Nudist Resort which is located just outside of Petaluma on Highway 101. Rihanna purchased the nudist resort in April of this year. She told Margarita Mixx wit...

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A List of Lindsay Lohan's 10 Favorite Bars

Funny story: A List of Lindsay Lohan's 10 Favorite Bars

It is no secret that Hollywood starlet Lindsay Lohan loves to take a drink every now and then, and now and then, and now and then. Lohan has been referred to as a celebrity camel who has a propensity for consuming alcohol that is pretty much unrivaled in the land of broken bright light dreams known as Tinsel Town. Tittle Tattle Tonight's Pico de Gallo recently sat down with the freckle-face...

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President Obama Is Tired of Alec Baldwin's Crazy Man Antics and Plans To Have Him Deported

Funny story: President Obama Is Tired of Alec Baldwin's Crazy Man Antics and Plans To Have Him Deported

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Alec Baldwin seems to think that he has all kinds of privileges and rights that no other American citizen has. According to Hollywood Hors D'oeuvres the second-rate actor has once again imploded and made himself look like a litt...

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Alaska's Pavlof Volcano Needs To Be Capped Says Sarah Palin

Funny story: Alaska's Pavlof Volcano Needs To Be Capped Says Sarah Palin

WASILLA, Alaska - Sarah Palin has just showed the world that she knows as much about volcanoes as she does about geography. The failed 2008 GOP vice-presidential candidate, who also quit as governor of Alaska in the middle of her term, recently st...

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Pit Bull Says Once J.Lo Dumps Casper Smart He'll Be On Her Like Stripes on A Zebra

Funny story: Pit Bull Says Once J.Lo Dumps Casper Smart He'll Be On Her Like Stripes on A Zebra

MIAMI - Pit Bull watched the first game of the NBA Finals and he was thrilled that the San Antonio Spurs defeated the Miami Heat 92-88. After the game Pit Bull was asked by Zorro La Bamba with The Sports Bet Gazette about the rumor that he and Jen...

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Rihanna and Oprah Winfrey Reportedly Feuding Over The "N" Word

Funny story: Rihanna and Oprah Winfrey Reportedly Feuding Over The "N" Word

CHICAGO - Word out of the Windy City is that the former talk show queen Oprah Winfrey and Caribbean beauty singer Rihanna are feuding over the use of a certain word. According to LaSabrosa Windwater, with Afro Sheen Magazine, Rihanna said that it...

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The GOP Could Be Riding Into The Sunset

Funny story: The GOP Could Be Riding Into The Sunset

TUCSON - A group of national Republican strategists met in Tucson to discuss what they can do to get the GOP from completely collapsing and going the way of the Ford Edsel, Cabbage Patch Dolls, and Pet Rocks. Vareena May Pottpiffle, 71, who is the...

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Governor Brewer of Arizona Disqualifies Wet T-Shirt Contest Winner Because She's A Lesbian

Funny story: Governor Brewer of Arizona Disqualifies Wet T-Shirt Contest Winner Because She's A Lesbian

YUMA, Arizona - The 19th Annual Arizona Wet T-Shirt Contest was held in Yuma and this year's overwhelming winner was Loribelle Tantaletti of Flagstaff. But Tantaletti's victory was short lived as Governor Jan Brewer soon learned from an unnamed so...

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Edward Snowden to Spy for the New York Mets

Funny story: Edward Snowden to Spy for the New York Mets

Flushing, New York -- Looking to even up their below .500 record before the end of the season, the New York Mets have added an espionage expert to their roster. He is the whistle-blowing traitor, Edward Snowden, and he will join the team as soo...

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NASA, a Mosquito-Sized WMD, a Dulicimer Player, and the Shooters Girls

Funny story: NASA, a Mosquito-Sized WMD, a Dulicimer Player, and the Shooters Girls

My dulcimer sits in the corner of my one-room camper looking like my out-of-touch, sarcastic, abusive freshman English Comp Instructor, Mr. Feducious Flynt. A ragged, ratty, bony thing, it's absolutely hideous. I haven't played the dulcimer in ages.

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Jennifer Aniston Having Second Thoughts About Getting Married

Funny story: Jennifer Aniston Having Second Thoughts About Getting Married

WEST HOLLYWOOD - Jennifer Aniston is reportedly having second thoughts about getting married to Justin Theroux. The latest issue of Glamboyant Magazine has an article written by Savannah Kettle which conveys the fact that Aniston has had a change...

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President Obama Agrees To Appear With George Clooney In An Action Packed Movie

Funny story: President Obama Agrees To Appear With George Clooney In An Action Packed Movie

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The White House has just announced that President Obama has been offered a role in George Clooney's next action packed motion picture. According to Silver Screen Showcase Magazine reporter Pomona Vox, Clooney has been after the...

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Monica Lewinsky Asks President Obama If He Can Hire Her To Be A White House Tour Guide

Funny story: Monica Lewinsky Asks President Obama If He Can Hire Her To Be A White House Tour Guide

WASHINGTON, D.C. - If there is one thing that Monica Lewinsky is not it's shy. The nation's most infamous White House intern has reportedly asked President Obama if he can hire her to be a White House tour guide. She stressed to the president that...

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Bizarre Alien Civilization Actually Likes Telemarketers

Funny story: Bizarre Alien Civilization Actually Likes Telemarketers

WASHINGTON, D.C. At a press conference yesterday,astronomer Dr. Stella Nightley (Ph.D, THC, LSD) announced that her team had discovered a new planet forty light-years from Earth. Thanks to the unprecedented power of the revolutionary new telescope a...

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The Latest Thing In Human Evolution - Interchangeable Body Parts

Funny story: The Latest Thing In Human Evolution - Interchangeable Body Parts

According to Genesis God made man out of the dust of the earth and woman out of Adam's rib - not an especially impressive start. But in the thousands of years since then things have changed and so have we humans. In Adam's and Eve's time they only needed to wear fig leaves to survive the environment until you -know -who came along. Nowadays one almost needs a suit of armor. What would it be li...

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Pope blames rough trade in the Vatican

Funny story: Pope blames rough trade in the Vatican

Rome - His Holiness has blamed a lurid Catacombs sex club called St Sebastian's Passageway for an outbreak of homosexuality in the Vatican. "At its core is a gay lobby," Pope Frankie the Argie said today, "swathed in peach-colored ruched silk drap...

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Dolly Parton To Star In The Film, Oops! - The Paula Deen Story

Funny story: Dolly Parton To Star In The Film, Oops! - The Paula Deen Story

LOS ANGELES - Miramix Pictures in association with Tri-Moon Productions has just announced that filming on the new Charleen Belle Pinnzucker movie Oops! - The Paula Deen Story will begin within the week. One of the South's most popular singers Dol...

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Queen Elizabeth Explodes When She Hears That Prince William Will Be Filming Kate Middleton Giving Birth

Funny story: Queen Elizabeth Explodes When She Hears That Prince William Will Be Filming Kate Middleton Giving Birth

NEW YORK CITY - Bedroom Pillow Talk is reporting that Kate Middleton's idea to have the birth of her and husband William's baby filmed has greatly angered Will's grandmother, Queen Elizabeth. BPT reporter Carolina Chipotle said she spoke with Brit...

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Madonna Comments On Her Alleged Charlie Sheen Bikini Line Tattoo

Funny story: Madonna Comments On Her Alleged Charlie Sheen Bikini Line Tattoo

NEW YORK CITY - Madonna is certainly one individual who has been around the block a few times so she is definitely no stranger to the world of rumors. She was asked by Vodka Vermicelli with iRumors about the story circulating around that she has a...

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Nina Dobrev and Ian Somerhalder To Star In The Movie, Hide & Seek - The Edward Snowden Story

Funny story: Nina Dobrev and Ian Somerhalder To Star In The Movie, Hide & Seek - The Edward Snowden Story

HOLLYWOOD - LaLaLand is already jumping on the huge NSA scandal regarding former NSA contractor Edward Snowden alias The Whistleblower. Tittle Tattle Tonight's Pico de Gallo has just learned that noted Italian director Bandini Borrapelli has signe...

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President Obama Lends Air Force One To George Clooney and Stacy Keibler

Funny story: President Obama Lends Air Force One To George Clooney and Stacy Keibler

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Several Republican senators have expressed concern over the fact that President Obama allowed George Clooney and his stunning girlfriend Stacy Keibler the use of Air Force One. White House Press Secretary Cal Colfax responded to...

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Ugly Dog Show Provides Missing Hairstyle Link

The 21st annual Ugly Dog Show that took place last week and has grown increasingly more popular every year, has attracted a unique and prestigious following lately. A group of scholars and scientists who have been "on the lookout" for a missing h...

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Share a Coke with: whoever you want

Funny story: Share a Coke with: whoever you want

After the remarkable success of writing people's names on the sides of their bottles, Coca-Cola are now selling blank bottles and letters for those people who don't appear on a bottle. "We've had a lot of people come to up to us and complain," sai...

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President Obama Bets Rush Limbaugh $20,000 That The San Antonio Spurs Will Beat The Miami Heat in The NBA Finals

Funny story: President Obama Bets Rush Limbaugh $20,000 That The San Antonio Spurs Will Beat The Miami Heat in The NBA Finals

WASHINGTON, D.C. - It is no secret that there has never been a U.S. president who was more into basketball than President Obama. And the president does love to make bets on all kinds of sporting events. He has said that since he doesn't go hunting...

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Curse of orange panties and trainer soles hexes top seeds Maria Sharapova and Roger Federer

Funny story: Curse of orange panties and trainer soles hexes top seeds Maria Sharapova and Roger Federer

Blushing Meadows, NY - "Serena Williams beware," an International Sartorial Tennis Association stylist said today, "those orange shorts/panties just gotta go or your Grand Slam dreams will end up tits-up." The women's World No 1 seed was being bee...

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Paris Hilton Denies That Her Erotic Sex Tape Is A Publicity Stunt

Funny story: Paris Hilton Denies That Her Erotic Sex Tape Is A Publicity Stunt

BEVERLY HILLS - Friends of Paris Hilton say that she is trying her hardest to keep from showing that she is thrilled that Lindsay Lohan is in rehab. According to Ling Chow Rangoon with iRumors, Paris actually flew down to Louisiana to meet with Ma...

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Facebook reverses policy on breasts

SILICONE VALLEY - Facebook has recently decided that, when it comes to women's chests, scars are okay. The social utility has decided that women will be allowed to display photographs of their mastectomy scars. "Even with regard to women, chests are...

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Aaron Hernandez of The New England Patriots Arrested - Gisele Bundchen Is Furious

Funny story: Aaron Hernandez of The New England Patriots Arrested - Gisele Bundchen Is Furious

NORTH ATTLEBORO, Massachusetts - Well like the saying goes, You can run but you can't hide. Police have arrested Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez and charged him with suspicion of murder. Hernandez told Rufus Reno with Sports Balls Illustrated D...

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Kelly Preston Suddenly Drops The John Travolta Divorce Talk

Funny story: Kelly Preston Suddenly Drops The John Travolta Divorce Talk

ORLANDO, Florida - After months of threatening to divorce her husband, movie star John Travolta, Kelly Preston has decided that she will stay with him and ride out the gay storm. According to Bedroom Pillow Talk at last count there were somewhere...

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An Alaskan Helicopter Company Tells Sarah Palin, "No More Free Rides"

Funny story: An Alaskan Helicopter Company Tells Sarah Palin, "No More Free Rides"

WASILLA, Alaska - It appears that Sarah Palin's free helicopter hunting rides are riding off into the sunset like Roy Rogers and Dale Evans did in so many western films. Cunningham "Caribou" Carbinfeister owner of The Chicka Chicka Helicopter Comp...

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Kell computers have major security vunerability, can be hacked to catch fire

Kell computers are everywhere. Kell states that over 70% of US public schools and 60% of businesses with computers own Kell computers. They are also popular amongst many homeowners as well. However, many Kell owners are at risk of becoming homeless,...

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Canada To Sell 80,000 Moose To Cuba

Funny story: Canada To Sell 80,000 Moose To Cuba

SASKATCHENWAN, Saskatoon - The government of Canada has announced that it has just signed a deal with Cuba to ship 80,000 moose to the island country. Canadian spokesperson Pierre Hors D'oeuvres stated that the moose will be rounded up by furlough...

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Rupert Murdoch in 'I did not have relations with Blair' shocker

Funny story: Rupert Murdoch in 'I did not have relations with Blair' shocker

New York - "Guys, there is no DNA-laced cigar or Lewinsky-esque blue dress," a statement on behalf of the NYC-based octogenarian NewsCorpse mogul said today, "either in the back of a closet or at a downtown dry cleaners. "Our client also refutes t...

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Tiger Woods Ex-Wife Elin Nordegren To Appear In The Nude In An Erotic Playmale Magazine Layout

Funny story: Tiger Woods Ex-Wife Elin Nordegren To Appear In The Nude In An Erotic Playmale Magazine Layout

CHICAGO - A spokesperson for Playmale Men's Magazine has just announced that after one year of basic begging, Elin Nordegren, also known as the ex-Mrs. Tiger Woods, has agreed to grace the glossy pages of their magazine. Ms. Nordegren agreed to ap...

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International Tennis Association warns about 'secret courts'

Funny story: International Tennis Association warns about 'secret courts'

Flushing Meadows, NY - The sport's governing body has responded to reports that Britain is planning to introduce 'secret courts' to prevent 'the misery' of long, drawn-out tie breaks at this year's Wimbledon championship meeting. "Relax, guys, the...

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President Obama Says He May Consider Hiring Paula Deen As A White House Cook

Funny story: President Obama Says He May Consider Hiring Paula Deen As A White House Cook

WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Obama says that he was shocked to hear that the televison cooking woman, Paula Deen has been fired by the Food Network for using the dreaded "N" word. The president said that he has met Miss Paula on several occasions...

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Sparks and Mensa launch Adjustable Height Heels

Funny story: Sparks and Mensa launch Adjustable Height Heels

Sparks and Mensa, the high street department store used by people with more brains than cash, has developed the latest must have trend for women: adjustable height heels. "We've all been there," said product designer Frank Boshell. "Sometimes we n...

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White paper makes people more creative

Funny story: White paper makes people more creative

A study by The British Paper Group has shown that whit backgrounds on computer screens and plain white paper gets the creative juices flowing in people. "We've tried lots of different coloured backgrounds, and different coloured paper," said Gary...

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Congress approves 'Rights Rationing' to balance liberty and security

Funny story: Congress approves 'Rights Rationing' to balance liberty and security

Washington DC -- With the nation trembling from recent threats by film critics, pressure cooker salesmen, wise guy journalists and wanna-be movie stars, enforcement agencies are demanding greater authority to monitor and control America. Meanwhile...

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Want to know your personality? There's an app for that!

Funny story: Want to know your personality? There's an app for that!

In the bad old days of psychotherapy, the therapist would feel the skull and determine a personality from the various bumps and ridges over the cranium. "The theory," said Mac Buck, editor of App World! magazine, "is that the brain's various cont...

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Bernanke selling all the stuff he bought on eBay

Funny story: Bernanke selling all the stuff he bought on eBay

Washington DC - According to anonymous sources close to Bernanke, he is selling all the securities, all the stocks, bonds, realestate, and gold that he purchased with the Federal Reserve System. Why? According to sources, Bernanke is leaving the...

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Floppy disk found in a chest on board the Titanic

Funny story: Floppy disk found in a chest on board the Titanic

Salvage hunters have made a controversial and contentious discovery of what appears to be a floppy disk, or 'diskette' inside a chest recovered from the Titanic wreck. "This is going to either overturn decades of technological history," said salva...

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Catherine Zeta-Jones tightlipped as husband Michael Douglas opens up about 'walnut-sized' oral sex tumor

Funny story: Catherine Zeta-Jones tightlipped as husband Michael Douglas opens up about 'walnut-sized' oral sex tumor

New York - "It's what guys of 69 channel when bi-polar wives are safely tucked up inside rehab," was one explanation this weekend as the Michael Douglas oral sex cancer story broke. The actor was quoted in a UK broadsheet describing how a walnut-s...

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Andy Roddick turns down $1 million Wimbledon TV commentator post

Funny story: Andy Roddick turns down $1 million Wimbledon TV commentator post

Lake Austin, Texas - "Andy just has too many balls up in the air right now," a PR for the Andy Roddick Foundation revealed, "to sweat it out in a cramped commentators' box for two whole weeks alongside shock-jocks Boris Becker, John McEnroe and Tim H...

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Ed Miliband: "I will ban heterosexual sex"

Funny story: Ed Miliband: "I will ban heterosexual sex"

Labour leader Ed Miliband has pledged to ban heterosexual sex if he wins the next general Election. "Heterosexual sex," claims Miliband, "is responsible for the population explosion and the resultant consequences are mass unemployment, famine and...

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Charles Barkley Wonders if ABC Sports Announcers Michael Breen and Jeff Van Gundy Are On The Miami Heat Payroll

Funny story: Charles Barkley Wonders if ABC Sports Announcers Michael Breen and Jeff Van Gundy Are On The Miami Heat Payroll

MIAMI - When local sportscasters constantly praise one team over another it is called being a homer. But when they do it in the NBA Finals it is called a cheap shot. Those were the sentiments of TNT analyst Charles Barkley. The man known as The Fa...

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Paris Hilton's New Erotic Sex Tape Named #1 In 13 States!

Funny story: Paris Hilton's New Erotic Sex Tape Named #1 In 13 States!

SAN FRANCISCO - Paris Hilton flew up to The City By The Bay to attend a sex tape signing event for her brand new erotic video. The sex tape titled Vangelina's Crotch Region Volcanic Eruption has been flying off the video store shelves faster than...

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I-95 Traffic Snarl Up Leads To Cannibalism

Funny story: I-95 Traffic Snarl Up Leads To Cannibalism

Two college buddies headed to Florida from their home in Richmond have been arrested and charged with murder after eating the third member of their group after being held up in traffic on the I-95. Brian James and Steven Brookes, both 21 year-old...

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Top knobs' shagging caper banjaxes No 10 spin machine

Funny story: Top knobs' shagging caper banjaxes No 10 spin machine

London - "This is the Brits' equivalent of the General Petraeus-Paula Broadwell scandal alright," a Pentagon cryptographer said today as the lurid details broke. "Both UK protagonists are well known to US military intelligence, we regularly sweep...

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7-Eleven Raided

OH, THANK HEAVEN, NY - 7-Eleven convenience stores were raided across Long island, New Yawk, by the city's finest, accompanied by Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms and Explosives (BATF) agents. The U. S. government considers alcohol, tobacco, f...

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Swarm of Africanized killer bees 'goes mental' chasing US drone near Ecuador airspace

Funny story: Swarm of Africanized killer bees 'goes mental' chasing US drone near Ecuador airspace

Pacific Ocean - The hunt for CIA intelligence whistleblower Edward Snowden intensified this morning amid reports that a massive dark cloud of Africanized killer bees has been picked up by Ecuador Air Force radar scanners tailing what looks like a US...

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Border Patrol agents to be stationed every six inches along entire southern border, have to stand sideways, arms around each other!

In a compromise this past week between GOP and Democrat Senators the border patrol budget has been increased by approximately one billion percent. According to the office of Budget and Management this will translate into a tax burden of over one million dollars for every man, woman and child in America. "Finally, we have a bi-partisan agreement on something," said Majority Leader Harry Reid. "...

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Walmart adding casinos and brothels?

Funny story: Walmart adding casinos and brothels?

An undisclosed source revealed today that the world's largest retailer, Walmart, is in the process, and making plans to place Mini-casinos in all of their Super stores. Joe Conforte, ex Nevada brothel owner has been approached at his South Americ...

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Another 'God's Banker' busted in Vatican money laundering racket

Funny story: Another 'God's Banker' busted in Vatican money laundering racket

Rome - A Vatican Airways cargo plane loaded with €20m of illicit cash stuffed into North Face-Off zip-up holdalls was readying to take off from Switzerland's Gnomes of Zurich Airport when police swooped late last night. The seizure, part of an ong...

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There Will Be A 50-Foot Statue Of Tom Cruise Built Even If I Have To Build It Myself - Says Tom Cruise

Funny story: There Will Be A 50-Foot Statue Of Tom Cruise Built Even If I Have To Build It Myself - Says Tom Cruise

Hollywood superstar Tom Cruise has promised his legion of fans that a proposed statue of him, which had originally received permits but were then revoked, will be built, even if the minute actor has "to build it my god damn self!" The town of Gray...

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Melissa McCarthy Furious With Chelsea Handler For Referring To Her As Mount St. Melissa

Funny story: Melissa McCarthy Furious With Chelsea Handler For Referring To Her As Mount St. Melissa

HOLLYWOOD - Melissa McCarthy appeared on Chelsea Handler's television show Chelsea Lately and she came very close to turning the dishwater blonde into a dishrag. McCarthy was there to promote her upcoming movie The Heat in which she stars with San...

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Police Warn New England Patriots Player Aaron Hernandez To Turn Himself In Or They'll Sell His House

Funny story: Police Warn New England Patriots Player Aaron Hernandez To Turn Himself In Or They'll Sell His House

NORTH ATTLEBORO, Massachusetts - The North Attleboro Police Department has informed the news media that they are tired of New England Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez playing games with them. The Pats receiver has been told to turn himself in to...

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Parody Letter from Ed Miliband to Voters

Hi everyone, and welcome to my world! My name is Edward Miliband, known mostly as Red Ed and I am fortunate to be Leader of Labour -the true people's party. I am a son of a Marxist millionaire and I live in a mansion worth couple of millions. As a true socialist I uphold high principles of socialism and dream of creating for all of you a utopian socialist paradise where everyone is equal...

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Pope's horse finishes last in Epsom Derby

Funny story: Pope's horse finishes last in Epsom Derby

Sport - Spanish Inquisitor, the nein!-to-one mount of His Eminence the Witchfinder General, stormed to a thrilling anticlimax round Tattenham Corner on Saturday afternoon to finish last behind winning favorite Kiss My Butt and at least thirty other t...

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Nevada Bans Chewing Gum

Funny story: Nevada Bans Chewing Gum

CARSON CITY, Nevada - The Nevada State Senate acting on a request of the vast majority of the Las Vegas Gambling casinos has just voted on a bill regarding the chewing of chewing gum. State Senator Hula Hanna Dimpsydew, 46, [D-Reno] stated that th...

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Katie Holmes Says She Misses Tom Cruise As Much As Lindsay Lohan Misses Her Late-Night Partying

Funny story: Katie Holmes Says She Misses Tom Cruise As Much As Lindsay Lohan Misses Her Late-Night Partying

NEW YORK CITY - Katie Holmes watched 7-year-old daughter Suri board and a plane to visit her father out West in Tinsel Town. After Suri left, Katie broke down and said that she cannot stand being alone and wants to get together with some guy but p...

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Maria Sharapova Denies She's Dating Danica Patrick's Ex-Husband

Funny story: Maria Sharapova Denies She's Dating Danica Patrick's Ex-Husband

NEW YORK CITY - World champion tennis player Maria Sharapova, 26, spoke with Sports Balls Illustrated Daily and addressed a rumor that is currently making the rounds. The grunting tennis player stated that she has no idea where the false rumor abo...

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The True Story of Marvel Comics' Scarlet Witch

Born of an incestuous union between The Whizzer (aka The Pisser) and his sister, Miss America, the Scarlet Witch (nee Bitch) became the life partner of her brother Pietro ("Quickie") Maximuff until they divorced in 1965, after which the Witch wed the no-count, ne'er-do-well Vision, a member of The Avengers (or maybe he was the Avengers' member; Marvel's historians disagree on the matter). Her n...

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Education Reforms

Funny story: Education Reforms

An overhaul of GCSEs in England has been announced by Education Secretary Michael Gove in an attempt to raise standards to "compete with the best in the world". Mr Gove announced that the government was thinking of introducing an I-Level standard som...

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Teams Most Likely to Win World Series

As baseball season progresses, so does our understanding of what teams are playoff contenders and what teams are local pie-eating contenders in their respective regions. In this post, I will notify you of what teams to keep a close eye on as the play...

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Charles Barkley Says NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell Is One Clueless Dude

Funny story: Charles Barkley Says NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell Is One Clueless Dude

ATLANTA - TNT sports analyst Charles Barkley called NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell's recent comments "turrible, turrible, turrible". Goodell responded to a request from ten United States Senators asking the owner of the Washington Redskins to chan...

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Chad Ochocinco Leaves Prison A Changed Man

Funny story: Chad Ochocinco Leaves Prison A Changed Man

BROWARD COUNTY, Florida - Former NFL football player Chad Johnson AKA Chad Ochocinco walked out of the Broward Country Jail after only serving 7 days of a 30 day sentence. According to an inside source (no pun intended) Ochocinco was let out early...

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IRS preparing rules to mandate weekly WAL*MART shopping list

Funny story: IRS preparing rules to mandate weekly WAL*MART shopping list

Washington DC - Ms. Inelay Ancerday, spokeswoman for the IRS, told TheSpoof.com today that in addition to taxpayers K, L, and M having to purchase $20,000.00 of health insurance from the approved cartel, all families of one or more people will be req...

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With Much Fanfare, the NRA Releases Its Version of the New Testament

Funny story: With Much Fanfare, the NRA Releases Its Version of the New Testament

The NRA today released its new translation of the New Testament, based heavily on the King James Version. Said NRA CEO Wayne LaPierre of the new translation: "We believe this new version of the New Testament will more accurately reflect the Second Amendment principles the United States and the nation of Israel were founded upon." What follows is an excerpt from the new translation, called,...

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Christina Aguilera Shows Off Her Sexy, Bikini-Clad Body

Funny story: Christina Aguilera Shows Off Her Sexy, Bikini-Clad Body

VENICE BEACH - Christina Aguilera has lost quite a bit of weight lately and she is not shy about letting people know it and showing it. Aguilera who was recently photographed on Venice Beach wearing one of the skimpiest, sexiest bikini swimsuits m...

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Apple annouces the iPhart portable lunch

Funny story: Apple annouces the iPhart portable lunch

California - Fresh from the fertile minds of Apple engineers, according to Apple spokesman Dick Mac Intush, the new portable iPhart lunches will be dispensed everywhere from new Apple vending machines. The new product offering includes: An appl...

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Speaker John Boehner "sits down to pee" - Latest Snowden NSA revelation!

Speaker John Boehner took to the floor of the US House of Representatives this morning demanding the immediate arrest and extradition of Edward Snowden from Russia. He also demanded an immediate trial and execution of Snowden as a traitor to the coun...

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New England Patriots Coach Bill Belichick Says Tim Tebow Will Replace Aaron Hernandez

Funny story: New England Patriots Coach Bill Belichick Says Tim Tebow Will Replace Aaron Hernandez

FOXBOROUGH, Massachusetts - Coach Bill Belichick is still in a state of semi-shock regarding former Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez. Belichick spoke with Sports Balls Illustrated Daily and stated that upon reflection he now realizes that some o...

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Stiletto Heels were invented for men!

Funny story: Stiletto Heels were invented for men!

Historians working at Cambridge University have discovered the origins of the stiletto heel, or court shoe, whilst trawling through cobbling records from seventeenth century France. "Many people think that court shoes are so called because they ar...

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Absinthe: a drink with so much kick it'll drill holes in your brain

Funny story: Absinthe: a drink with so much kick it'll drill holes in your brain

"For the lips of an adulteress drip honey, and smoother than oil is her speech; but in the end she is bitter as wormwood, sharp as a two-edged sword. Her feet go down to death, her steps lay hold of Sheol." -Proverbs 5:4 I'll start this in my usual stupid and inane way - If the Internet had an official bird it would most likely be a turkey vulture. If it had...

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LeBron James Said Acting Like Kobe Bryant Fired Up His Miami Heat Teammates

Funny story: LeBron James Said Acting Like Kobe Bryant Fired Up His Miami Heat Teammates

MIAMI - The Miami Heat defeated the San Antonio Spurs 103-100 in overtime in game six to tie things up at three victories each pushing the NBA finals to a game seven. After the game James was asked by Sports Balls Illustrated Daily's Rufus Reno wh...

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Scientists discover new species of fish

PAPUA, NEW GUINEA - Scientists know it as "pacu," but the natives of New Guinea refer to the same marine species as the "fellatio fish." "It's a real ball-sucker," Jimmy Wade told this reporter. "Sometimes, the fish goes even further, becoming a real...

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Kristen Stewart May Pose In The Nude In Order To Get Back In The Hollywood Spotlight

Funny story: Kristen Stewart May Pose In The Nude In Order To Get Back In The Hollywood Spotlight

WEST HOLLYWOOD - The star of The Twilight Saga series, Kristen Stewart is said to be feeling very down and depressed about the fact that her career has seemed to hit a fortified brick wall. Stewart recently spoke with Barbara Walters on The View a...

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Shaquille O'Neal and Charles Barkley Are Interested In Buying The Miami Heat

Funny story: Shaquille O'Neal and Charles Barkley Are Interested In Buying The Miami Heat

MIAMI - Former NBA all-stars Shaquille O'Neal and Charles Barkley flew into Miami to talk to the Miami Heat ownership. The Heat just won the 2012-2013 NBA Finals by defeating The San Antonio Spurs in a hard fought best four out of seven series tha...

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Religious Tolerance Advocates to WBC: Psychological Terrorism Is Not Free Speech

Funny story: Religious Tolerance Advocates to WBC: Psychological Terrorism Is Not Free Speech

TOPEKA, KANSAS (Acme Quicknews) -- Who can say that the Westboro Baptist Church (WBC) can't taste their own dose of picket? Religious tolerance advocates around America, composing of members of different religions, counter the ways of the WBC by p...

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