There were 558 spoof news stories published in June 2004. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.

Funny story: Bigfoot found, shot down in cold blood

Bigfoot found, shot down in cold blood

REDCLIFF, Wash. -- A hunter claims that he saw the legendary beast known as Bigfoot, shot him five times through the chest and watched it bleed to death in a remote part of Washington state.

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Funny story: Stephen Hawking sues Microsoft for copying his voice

Stephen Hawking sues Microsoft for copying his voice

World-famous cosmologist and theoretical physicist Stephen Hawking has today filed a lawsuit against Microsoft Corporation for unlawful replication of his trademark computerised voice.

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Funny story: Osama Bin Laden Will Attend Reagan Funeral

Osama Bin Laden Will Attend Reagan Funeral

Washington (AP) Osama Bin Laden is going to try to attend Ronald Reagan's funeral this week. The CIA reports a high level of chatter on several Middle East channels that indicate the terrorist leader will alter his appearance in order to show up with...

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Funny story: Google to shut down Gmail

Google to shut down Gmail

Google confirmed that it will shut down its beta Gmail email service in July.

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Funny story: Massage and fellatio head dentists' poll to ease tension

Massage and fellatio head dentists' poll to ease tension

A Leeds-based dental practice is taking the pain and stress out of a visit to the surgery and replacing it with pleasure.

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Funny story: Humane Treatment for Hitler's Offspring?

Humane Treatment for Hitler's Offspring?

Hitler's putative offspring liked to talk about destroying anencephalic infants. They claimed that beings like the anencephalic are useless. They believed that such infants should be allowed to die, unlike the medical society in this country which believes in providing warmth and ventilation until such infants expire naturally. Sure, the young Hitler’s had the influence of Herr Fuh...

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Funny story: Elmo detained at Guantanamo Bay

Elmo detained at Guantanamo Bay

Lovable and cuddly child icon Elmo was deported today to Camp X-ray, Guantanamo Bay, Cuba, charged with planning acts of terror against the state.

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Funny story: Apple Introduces Expensive White Box with Holes, Plug, and Logo

Apple Introduces Expensive White Box with Holes, Plug, and Logo

SILICON VALLEY, CA June 8 - Apple today unveiled a new device called iBOX. This attractive white box plugs into a typical wall socket and draws an economical 650 watts of power simply to light up the its useless logo. However, befor...

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Funny story: Paris Hilton to Have Sex on Next SpaceshipOne Mission!

Paris Hilton to Have Sex on Next SpaceshipOne Mission!

"I've had sex everywhere else; now I want to do it in space!" says Paris Hilton, slutty heiress to the Hilton Hotel fortune. "I've already booked passage on that new private Spaceship One. Rick Salomon is going up with me and we're going to do it in...

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Funny story: Mike Tyson to Host Reality Series, Faces Lawsuits

Mike Tyson to Host Reality Series, Faces Lawsuits

A day after regaining his license to fight in the state of New Jersey, former heavyweight champion of the world Mike Tyson announced that he has begun taping a reality show titled "Black Eye for the White Guy" for the Bravo network. The sho...

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Funny story: Iranian Frog Gives Birth to "Judy Finnegan"

Iranian Frog Gives Birth to "Judy Finnegan"

An Iranian newspaper has reported the controversial story of a frog who claims to have given birth to a Daytime Television presenter.

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Funny story: Vatican Report: The Inquisition wasn't that bad...George W. Bush Agrees

Vatican Report: The Inquisition wasn't that bad...George W. Bush Agrees

Vatican Officials have released a report saying that although the Inquisition burned people at the stake, stretched them to death on the rack, maimed and abused tens of thousands and possibly millions just because they weren't Roman Catholic, it real...

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Funny story: Indian actress bills Clinton for sex

Indian actress bills Clinton for sex

An Indian actress has claimed that former United States President Bill Clinton had sex with her and has not yet paid the bill.

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Funny story: CIA Reveals Satan Met With Bin Laden in 2001, Is Harboring Terrorists in Hell

CIA Reveals Satan Met With Bin Laden in 2001, Is Harboring Terrorists in Hell

WASHINGTON, DC-- George Bush has been having trouble Proving Osama Bin Laden met with Saddam Hussein, but top CIA officials this week revealed that they have uncovered proof the Al Qaeda leader had met with Satan, (AKA Lucifer, Prince of Darkness, Be...

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Funny story: Tobacco Execs: New Cigarette Pacifier Not Targeting Kids

Tobacco Execs: New Cigarette Pacifier Not Targeting Kids

Washington D.C. - In a press conference held on the steps of Congress, Representatives for tobacco giant Philip Morris refuted claims that the new cigarette pacifier is aimed towards a younger market.

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Funny story: Ming the Merciless unveils "diabolical" plan to conquer Earth

Ming the Merciless unveils "diabolical" plan to conquer Earth

Mongo - The world was briefly terrified today in the aftermath of a newsflash announcement from none other than Emperor Ming of Mongo, the sinister tyrant of the 1930's serial "Flash Gordon", who demanded that Earth's rulers abdicate to him or face t...

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Funny story: Paris Hilton Gives Out "Sex Flight Training" Email Address!

Paris Hilton Gives Out "Sex Flight Training" Email Address!

As reported earlier, Paris Hilton has been going though extensive flight training for her upcoming porno film to be made in space on a special flight aboard SpaceshipOne. Paris has been going through so many men during sex flight training, she ha...

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Funny story: Britney Spears Adds Third Breast

Britney Spears Adds Third Breast

When she first burst on the pop music scene Britney Spears was a young, relatively talented, relatively flat-chested girl. Within a year or so as her career took off, so did the size of her chest. Or perhaps more accurately, as her breasts...

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Funny story: Congress bans Midget Adoption

Congress bans Midget Adoption

WASHINGTON- Midget Rights groups around the nation were devastated last night after Congress passed a Bill banning Midget Adoption.

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Funny story: Thousands of Teen Girls Vie for Part in Orlando Bloom Movie

Thousands of Teen Girls Vie for Part in Orlando Bloom Movie

LEXINGTON, Ky--At least 50,000 screaming teenage girls appeared at a general casting call for the Cameron Crowe film "Elizabethtown" starring Orlando Bloom.

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Funny story: Internet satire taken over by goddamn hippies

Internet satire taken over by goddamn hippies

New York - Noted internet satire The Bunion has been officially taken over by goddamn hippies, sources have told The Spoof.

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Funny story: George Huff To Record Single With Fantasia Barrino & John Stevens

George Huff To Record Single With Fantasia Barrino & John Stevens

Yes, that's right. Former Idol contestant George Huff is going to record his very first single. He will be recording his own rendition of an old classic, re-titled to fit his own likings. The sensation will be recording "Huff The Magic Dr...

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Funny story: Clay Aiken's Brush With Worse- Than -Death; The Attack of the Paparazzi!

Clay Aiken's Brush With Worse- Than -Death; The Attack of the Paparazzi!

Clay Aiken's Brush With Worse- Than -Death; The Attack of the Paparazzi! Some time ago when the former AI 2 runner-up was just getting his feet wet with all the star-related craziness, and he had to make the transition between cute, naïve country boy with freckles and savvy, cool L.A. star with sex appeal, he had an experience that almost made him decide to dump the entire idea of pursuing fa...

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Funny story: George Bush, Tony Blair, Britney Spears and her Beaver to form barber shop quartet

George Bush, Tony Blair, Britney Spears and her Beaver to form barber shop quartet

(NEW YORK) - Jive Records, the label behind such famous artists as Britney Spears and … Britney Spears, has in a spectacular turn of events announced today that the U.S. President George Bush and the British Prime Minister Tony Blair will be t...

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Funny story: Nancy Reagan: "I'm In Love Again"

Nancy Reagan: "I'm In Love Again"

LOS ANGELES - Only weeks after the death of her husband, former President Ronald Reagan, Nancy Reagan announced that she has found love again. The object of her affection is none other than 1980's TV star and bling-bling pioneer Mr. T. "He...

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Funny story: George Bush to Pope John Paul: John Kerry is Satan

George Bush to Pope John Paul: John Kerry is Satan

President George W. Bush had a private meeting with Catholic Pope John Paul II in Rome where the President asked the Pope for help in his re election bid. President Bush, a born again Evangelical Christian who believes all Catholics will burn in Hell...

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Funny story: Olsen Twins Travel The World for 18th

Olsen Twins Travel The World for 18th

Today is the big day. Long time actresses Mary Kate and Ashley Fuller Olsen, also known as the Olsen Twins, even though they don't particularly like that title anymore, turn 18 today, June 13th. It is a big celebration. At exactly 12:00AM las...

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Funny story: Donald Rumsfeld in Sex Shocker!

Donald Rumsfeld in Sex Shocker!

The Pentagon press corps was embarrassed by Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld's "coming out" announcement this morning at the 9 A. M. briefing. Mr. Rumsfeld, normally conservative in appearance and manner, seemed uncharacteristically at ease as he...

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Funny story: Dakota Fanning, A New Mother

Dakota Fanning, A New Mother

Actress Hannah Dakota Fanning has just had a baby. At 10:40PM June 15th, the young actress gave birth to a 4 pound girl which she is still discussing with her mother of whether to keep the baby or give her up for adoption, as Sheryl Crow was very r...

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Funny story: Airport Security Measures Cause Athlete's Foot

Airport Security Measures Cause Athlete's Foot

Studies released today indicate that heightened international airport security measures may be contributing to an increased number of foot fungus cases, commonly known as athlete's foot.

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Funny story: 1,000 Gmail accounts for free!

1,000 Gmail accounts for free!

Gmail account holder Anthony D'Costa announced that he was gifting away 1,000 Gmail accounts for free.

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Funny story: Sheryl Crow & Clay Aiken, lovers?

Sheryl Crow & Clay Aiken, lovers?

What do we have here, a disgusted rock star? Well, it looks that way. Despite the rumors, Clay and Sheryl are not going out and she has made that very clear to us.

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Funny story: Nudeism Made Easy

Nudeism Made Easy

Naturism, the concept of doffing one’s clothing and experiencing life as our Creator intended, has always appealed to me, and on many occasions I have even become what one might call a “closet nudist.” Before and after showers, when dressing or undressing and in certain other unmentionable situations, I am sometimes to be found wholly unclad. While this may shock and disappoint some, let me tell...

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Funny story: Bush Calls Up Boy Scouts for Tour of Duty

Bush Calls Up Boy Scouts for Tour of Duty

Late today, President George Bush and Secretary of Defense, Donald Rumsfeld announced at a brief press conference that up to 150,000 Boy Scouts from across America would be called into active duty in Iraq effective immediately.

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Funny story: Al-Qaeda Lets Loose Giant Bunny in Dallas, TX!

Al-Qaeda Lets Loose Giant Bunny in Dallas, TX!

Dallas, TX -- Residents of the city woke up Monday morning to find a giant bunny ravaging downtown buildings. Al-Qaeda has already claimed responsibility for the attack.

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Funny story: Bono Announces Plan to Unite George Bush and Michael Moore.

Bono Announces Plan to Unite George Bush and Michael Moore.

At a hastily called press conference on his private estate at Rudder Cut Cay in the Bahamas, Irish legend, Bono - the sometimes lead singer in the popular beat combo U2, the seeker of truth, justice and world peace, the man who would be Jesus bejesus...

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Funny story: A Paid Advertisment by George W. Bush

A Paid Advertisment by George W. Bush

My fellow Americans: As your President, I have tried my best to make all the money flow to the rich where it can do the most good. I have tried to give my friends in the oil bidness all the breaks they deserve. Meanwhile, the Democrats have de...

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Funny story: A Paid Advertisement for John Kerry

A Paid Advertisement for John Kerry

To all the good citizens of America who can vote for me: I am John Kerry---someone you can both trust and look up to. While serving as a Senator from Massachusetts, I have worked hard to gain your appreciation. I am running for President of...

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Funny story: Osama Bin Laden Shaves Britney Spears Daily!

Osama Bin Laden Shaves Britney Spears Daily!

The stupid American Generals think I have been hiding in caves in Afghanistan and Pakistan. I have been secretly touring with Britney Spears for the past ten months. My job has been to shave the girl every day. When I get done with her, only the hair...

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Funny story: "I'm Gay and proud of it!"- Ryan Seacrest

"I'm Gay and proud of it!"- Ryan Seacrest

Ryan Seacrest, American Idol host, has recently appeared on Fox News to admit his long-time romantic relationship with 'Idol' judge Simon Cowell. "It was a like a rollercoaster," he says, "there were times when we thought the r...

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Funny story: Al-Qaeda hates America, plans attacks, says US Dept. of Obvious

Al-Qaeda hates America, plans attacks, says US Dept. of Obvious

New evidence suggests group may be terror organization that targets large buildings, government installations and populous cities...

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Funny story: Former D.C. Mayor Marion Barry Announces Bid, Kool-Aid Endorsement

Former D.C. Mayor Marion Barry Announces Bid, Kool-Aid Endorsement

(Washington) Former Washington D.C. mayor Marion Barry, known for his past problems with cocaine use, announced this week his plans to run for office again in the district. Perhaps more surprising was Barry's statement that he had just...

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Funny story: Christopher Hitchens admits he's a little bit Michael Moore

Christopher Hitchens admits he's a little bit Michael Moore

By James Dean Bradfield, (BBC Online) - "To describe this film as a piece of crap would be to run the risk of a discourse that would never again rise above the excremental" wrote self-declared iconoclast Christopher Hitchens in the online m...

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Funny story: George W. Bush Declares Martial Law

George W. Bush Declares Martial Law

President George W. Bush has taken the unique step of declaring Martiall Law without the country having either been attacked or being under imminent threat of attack. Administration Officials, concerned about falling public opinion polls and the real...

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Funny story: Jesus to Replace Seinfeld in Superman Ad Campaign

Jesus to Replace Seinfeld in Superman Ad Campaign

UP--In an announcement earlier today, American Express revealed that after creative differences with current spokesperson Jerry Seinfeld, the comedian would be replaced in the current Superman advertising campaign. The company then shocked everyone b...

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Funny story: "Osama Bin Laden Is My Son!"

"Osama Bin Laden Is My Son!"

ST PETERSBURG. Workers excavating a basement in the old city came across an old photo album that has left local historians astonished. "It appears that we have found pictures of the infamous Rasputin, many of which have notes and interesting sto...

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Funny story: USDA: Cocaine a "Fresh Vegetable"

USDA: Cocaine a "Fresh Vegetable"

WASHINGTON - According to a federal judge, pure, unadulterated cocaine is now a vegetable. However, the Agriculture Department said Tuesday that this classification will not apply to nutrition, and that a line of nose candy is no substitute for a ca...

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Funny story: US Postal System Nears Collapse!

US Postal System Nears Collapse!

Unconfirmed Sources report that the US postal system has been plunged into chaos. Too many streets and towns newly renamed after Ronald Reagan are to blame. Postal employees just don't know where to send the mail!...

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Funny story: Hollywood rocked after tan line spotted on George Hamilton

Hollywood rocked after tan line spotted on George Hamilton

The acting community was stunned after Variety Magazine reported that an anonymous source spotted what is believed to be a tan line on George Hamilton.

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Funny story: Iraq government temps get naked truth

Iraq government temps get naked truth

BAGHDAD -- In a controversial development today, members of the new Iraqi interim government were stripped and marched to their offices by coalition troops.

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Funny story: Republicans Love Michael Moore's Satirical Comedy Fahrenheit 9/11!

Republicans Love Michael Moore's Satirical Comedy Fahrenheit 9/11!

Unconfirmed Sources report Republicans across the nation love Michael Moore's satirical treatment of the Bush administration. Republicans are flocking to theaters to see the new comedy Fahrenheit 9/11 and are telling their friends about it. Exit...

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Funny story: President George Bush: Republican Jedi?

President George Bush: Republican Jedi?

After taking a beating in recent opinion polls following the 9-11 Commissions disclosures regarding the absence of evidence relating to links between Al Qaeda and Saddam Hussein's Iraqi regime, President George W. Bush attempted...

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Funny story: Will the FCC fine Dick Cheney for the use of the F Word?

Will the FCC fine Dick Cheney for the use of the F Word?

Vice President Dick Cheney according to his aides, was "just having a bad day", when he decided to tell Democratic Senator Patrick Leahy of Vermont to "f--- off" or "f--- yourself". What an F'ing hypocrite. Is this the same Dick Cheney who is the president of the Senate, where they voted last week 99-1 to up the ante with even more fines for broadcasters who ma...

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Funny story: Yahoo and Google to be Auctioned on Ebay Tomorrow

Yahoo and Google to be Auctioned on Ebay Tomorrow

In a joint news conference, the management teams of Yahoo and Goggle announced that both companies would be auctioned off to the highest bidder on Ebay tomorrow morning. David Filo, co-founder of Yahoo said, "No one can find anything around here...

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Funny story: Gatorade Introduces New Meat Flavored Beverages

Gatorade Introduces New Meat Flavored Beverages

SEATTLE, WASHINGTON - After public demand and a 46-hour hunger strike, the Gatorade Corporation has finally approved plans for a brand new lineup of meat flavored sports drinks. Some of the upcoming flavors include Fierce Pork, Frosty Beef, a...

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Funny story: Ryan Seacrest Elected Mayor of Atlanta

Ryan Seacrest Elected Mayor of Atlanta

He hosts American Idol. He is the star of his own talk show. And now he is about to take on a new role: mayor of a major American city.

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Funny story: Official Clinton portrait does nothing for his image

Official Clinton portrait does nothing for his image

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Most people were shocked when President Bush revealed the newly painted portrait of former President Clinton and it looked nothing like him (see photo).

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Funny story: Donald Duck dead at 70

Donald Duck dead at 70

ORLANDO, Fla. -- Donald Duck, world-famous cartoon duck and stalwart of the Disney animation empire, is dead at 70.

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Funny story: Martha Stewart flees country with Michael Jackson

Martha Stewart flees country with Michael Jackson

NEW YORK - In an eleventh hour decision, Martha Stewart and Michael Jackson have fled the country for more forgiving shores and, according to a source in the French government, both are now official residents of France with no fears of extradi...

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Funny story: Matrix fan "thrilled" his new English teacher is Greg Anderson

Matrix fan "thrilled" his new English teacher is Greg Anderson

BLOOMINGTON, MN- Mike Brown, a freshman and "Matrix" fan at Bloomington Public High School has something to wait for next fall: His new English teacher is Greg Anderson.

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Funny story: Vin Diesel Accepts Second VP Nod

Vin Diesel Accepts Second VP Nod

AP, Helion, Stardate 17549.1. In a move unprecedented in American politics, Vin Diesel agreed to accept the Republican Vice Presidential candidacy, only days after accepting the Democratic VP candidacy (reported in The Spoof on Stardate 1754...

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Funny story: Jennifer Lopez Angry No News on Her This Week, Marries Marc Anthony

Jennifer Lopez Angry No News on Her This Week, Marries Marc Anthony

Los Angeles - In a move that shocked no one, Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony married after weeks of denying anything more than a friendship. The wedding was apparently an attempt to get Lopez in the news for 183 consecutive weeks, a new record for a...

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Funny story: Local Girl Reports She Wants to "Punch" Avril Lavigne

Local Girl Reports She Wants to "Punch" Avril Lavigne

Topeka, Kansas - Local area resident, Cotie Shintani, 13, wants to "punch" popular Canadian songstress Avril Lavigne. On Monday evening, while typing to an undisclosed friend through the popular AOL Instant Messenger, Shintani expressed that "someti...

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Funny story: Bill Clinton's Dog Comes Clean

Bill Clinton's Dog Comes Clean

Decent people the world over were visibly shocked today by Bill Clinton's confession that his dog did have sexual relations in the Oval Office.

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Funny story: Cheney to Girl Scouts: "Eat Me"

Cheney to Girl Scouts: "Eat Me"

WASHINGTON - Vice President Dick Cheney, recently overheard dropping the "F-bomb" to Sen. Patrick Leahy, D-Vermont, has struck again. At a brief photo op this morning, he told the members of Girl Scout Troop 1327 of Neurath, Alabama to &qu...

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Funny story: Jonathan Franzen and Oprah Winfrey Collaborate on Book

Jonathan Franzen and Oprah Winfrey Collaborate on Book

Los Angeles, CA--Author Jonathan Franzen and television personality Oprah Winfrey have written a book together, which is scheduled to be released next week in hardcover for $24.95. It will be available at all major bookstores but will not be promoted...

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Funny story: FCC URGED TO FINE VICE-PRESIDENT CHENEY FOR DECENCY VIOLATION

FCC URGED TO FINE VICE-PRESIDENT CHENEY FOR DECENCY VIOLATION

Washington (June 29) - Under intense public pressure including a personal appeal from shock jock Howard Stern, the Federal Communications Commission is considering fining Vice-President Dick Cheney $275,000 for using the f-word in a conversation with...

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Funny story: ESPN Formally Apologizes to Utopiafootball

ESPN Formally Apologizes to Utopiafootball

Several months ago on his ESPN Radio show Sportscenter Anchor Dan Patrick proclaimed that McPherson College could make a claim for the Sugar Bowl on a list comprised of who beat who during the 2003 College Football season. Patrick made reference to...

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Funny story: Post-Natal Abortion Legalized

Post-Natal Abortion Legalized

LONDON, England -- A new law, just approved by parliament, requires all prospective parents to sign a Declaration of Parenthood after the birth of their child and before the infant receives any official documents. Until this paper is signed, the newl...

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Funny story: Four Idols: The Next Great Supergroup

Four Idols: The Next Great Supergroup

If you thought the American Idol craze was finally over, think again: The first supergroup is being formed, and it's made up of the final two contestants from each of the past two seasons.

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Funny story: John Mayer Accused of Being "Repetitive Story Teller"

John Mayer Accused of Being "Repetitive Story Teller"

New York - John Mayer, the talented 26 year-old singer/songwriter has been the recipient of many accolades and awards in his short career, but now the bright glare of the spotlight may be bringing unwanted attention to the affable talent.

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Funny story: Ayava CEO announces he loves a Zebra

Ayava CEO announces he loves a Zebra

Dan Patterson, Chairman and CEO of Ayava Inc, manufacturer of Dyalasis machines and services to the Saudi royal family amongst others, announced today his impending marriage to Untembe a wild Zebra from Kenya. He and his fellow senior executives w...

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Funny story: Dead Sea Scrolls scholars say it was John the Baptist

Dead Sea Scrolls scholars say it was John the Baptist

(Vatican Library, Tuesday). Astonished scholars of the Holy See today unveiled the findings of the Grateful Dead Sea Scroll Committee, headed by Prof Geezer Worms, which categorically state that the alleged founder of the Christian Church was in fa...

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Funny story: Kurt Cobain Found Alive

Kurt Cobain Found Alive

Singer/guitarist of Nirvana found alive at a K-Mart in Idaho, writing sad lyrics and surprising everyone.

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Funny story: BBC to Air Pro-Saddam Documentary

BBC to Air Pro-Saddam Documentary

London (AP) - The British Broadcasting Corporation has announced it is to air a pro-Saddam Hussein documentary. In a statement the BBC board of directors said 'the decision to make this documentary isn't expected to to be controversial'.

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Funny story: Christians Face Discrimination

Christians Face Discrimination

TEMPE, AZ Jerome Johnson appears to be a normal person on the outside. A young, good-looking teacher in Tempe, he appears to have everything going for him. However, he has one dirty secret that causes him to face discrimination every day: He's...

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Funny story: Greenspan forecasts doom if he dies

Greenspan forecasts doom if he dies

WASHINGTON, D.C. -- Alan Greenspan said that the Federal Reserve will run out of money and the world will fall into financial despair when he dies.

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Funny story: New Muppet Added to Sesame Street

New Muppet Added to Sesame Street

During it's time on the air, Sesame Street has been broadcast to more than 120 million children in 130 nations and three galaxies, making it - according to the Children's Television Workshop, the show's producer-"a really big deal."...

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Funny story: Prince Charles Hits Out at Sting Claims

Prince Charles Hits Out at Sting Claims

Prince Charles hit back today at claims that he was a Sting fan, as debates surrounding the former Police front man's musical legacy raged. Sting, who announced that he was quitting the music business this week, suggested that the Prince was a big f...

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Funny story: Creative Writing Staff Fired at University of Iowa; Realtors To Teach

Creative Writing Staff Fired at University of Iowa; Realtors To Teach

Iowa City, IA--The University of Iowa today fired all faculty members in its prestigious creative writing program and replaced them with realtors who had $4 million or more of residential sales during the preceding year.

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Funny story: George W. Bush Comments on the Values of America

George W. Bush Comments on the Values of America

President George W. Bush, speaking at the NATO Summit in Turkey said that embracing the principles of democracy does not mean embracing American culture. "Look at me," said President Bush during comments made at the Summit, " I'm the least cultural p...

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Funny story: Zeus to light torch at Athen's Olympics ceremony

Zeus to light torch at Athen's Olympics ceremony

ATHENS, Greece -- Zeus, the supreme ruler of Mount Olympus and of the Pantheon of gods who resided there, has agreed to take part in the opening ceremonies of the 2004 Summer Olympic Games in Athens.

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Funny story: Ketchup Discovered to Have Strong Antimicrobial Properties

Ketchup Discovered to Have Strong Antimicrobial Properties

When drippings from a laboratory technician's French Fries totally expunged the contents of 317 Petri dishes, scientists learned that ketchup is as, if not more, effective than many currently used antibiotics.

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Funny story: Tony Blair takes Bill Clinton on to be his Advisor/Lover

Tony Blair takes Bill Clinton on to be his Advisor/Lover

On Monday, Tony Blair will officially take Bill Clinton on as an advisor about the US. Since President Bush is making Osama Bin Laden his new Vice president, Blair figured he'd need someone with an inside track.

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Funny story: All Britney Spears news stories banned

All Britney Spears news stories banned

CHICAGO -- A policy created by the United Association of Press Writers (UAPW) in a unanimous vote calls for all newspapers and agencies to ban Britney Spears stories.

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Funny story: George W. Bush: "I don't think I'm gay!"

George W. Bush: "I don't think I'm gay!"

WASHINGTON (AP) Since his recent TV appearance on "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy", President George W. Bush has been spending a lot of time in locked in his bedroom. Barbara Bush says, "He just stands in his closet looking at his clot...

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Funny story: Wes Craven to Take Helm of 'Passion of Christ' Sequel

Wes Craven to Take Helm of 'Passion of Christ' Sequel

(UP) Mel Gibson announced today that he will be stepping back from the director's chair for the sequel to last spring's biblical box office smash 'The Passion of the Christ.' Gibson has decided to hand the reigns over to horror guru...

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Funny story: L'Oreal Scientists Discover New Elements

L'Oreal Scientists Discover New Elements

PARIS: Scientists from the L'Oreal Institute of Cosmetic Research yesterday announced that they had discovered and named two new chemical elements - Nutrileum™ and Boswelox™. The news threatens to render millions of chemistry textbooks obsolete,...

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Funny story: George W. Bush Addicted to Viagra!

George W. Bush Addicted to Viagra!

THE WHITE HOUSE (AP) Richard Tubb, M.D., director of the White House Medical Unit and President Bush's personal physician told reporters that President George W. Bush had to undergo emergency treatment last night for an "uncontrolled erectio...

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Funny story: FEC Rules Fahrenheit 9/11 Ads are Political Ads: Moore Ties with Bush and Kerry in National Poll!

FEC Rules Fahrenheit 9/11 Ads are Political Ads: Moore Ties with Bush and Kerry in National Poll!

Unconfirmed Sources indicate that the FEC ruling that ads for Fahrenheit 9-11 are political ads has catapulted Michael Moore into the presidential election. A national snap poll of likely voters has all three candidates tied at 33% with 1% undecided.

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Funny story: Brett Favre Named Replacement For God

Brett Favre Named Replacement For God

Fantastic quarterback and grade-A father Brett Favre has received a great honor this week in being named the replacement for God.

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Funny story: McCartney offers new Beatles 'facts'

McCartney offers new Beatles 'facts'

LONDON - Ex-Beatles member Paul McCartney said, "I tried heroin just once and didn't like it." McCartney repeated the statement a number of times in public before a few reporters heard him and decided to try to make some kind of news item about it.

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Funny story: Reagan legacy: Fistful of Jelly Beans

Reagan legacy: Fistful of Jelly Beans

The presidency, The Gipper now reminds us, is performance art. And so George Bush, badly miscast as leader of the free world, plays President George W. Bush -- part action hero, part villain, part Burt Reynolds ham -- with a devious twinkle and a...

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Funny story: Baltimore, Detroit vie for Most Murders

Baltimore, Detroit vie for Most Murders

This year the nation is focused on one of the tightest races in history. The question on everyone's mind is not Kerry or Bush, but rather Baltimore or Detroit? Which city will take back the coveted homicide title that has eluded them in recent year...

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Funny story: Supreme Court tells atheist to go to hell

Supreme Court tells atheist to go to hell

WASHINGTON, D.C. - The Supreme Court has ruled to preserve the phrase "one nation, under God," in the Pledge of Allegiance, saying that a California atheist who challenged the phrase should accept it or go to hell.

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Funny story: Divine Intervention - Creed Calls it Quits!

Divine Intervention - Creed Calls it Quits!

HELL (AP) -- Creed, the pseudo-Christian rockers responsible for such noise pollution as "Higher" and "With Arms Wide Open," finally called it quits Monday after lead singer Scott Stapp suffered serious injuries while performing a Jesus Christ pose.

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Funny story: National Day of Morning For Ronald Reagan

National Day of Morning For Ronald Reagan

President George W. Bush has declared Friday, June 11 as a National Day of Morning in honor of Dead President Ronald Reagan. It is unknown at this point exactly how a day that is only morning will work, as this has never been tried before, but most r...

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Funny story: Reagan sightings begin

Reagan sightings begin

DURNBARN, Tenn. -- The first post-life Ronald Reagan sighting has taken place only hours after the former President/actor's death was announced.

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Funny story: Mr. Bojangles joins Clinton on book tour

Mr. Bojangles joins Clinton on book tour

MACON, Ga. -- Famous song-and-dance man Mr. Bojangles has joined Bill Clinton on his promotional book tour.

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Funny story: Republican Party Seeks Replacement for George W. Bush

Republican Party Seeks Replacement for George W. Bush

Republicans are scrambling to find a candidate to replace George W. Bush in time for the Republican National Convention in New York City this August. While six months ago President Bush looked like such a shoo in for the nomination that the GOP never...

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Funny story: George W Bush in drink/drugs hell

George W Bush in drink/drugs hell

WASHINGTON (AP) - During a candid interview with Geraldo Rivera on NBC's Internight discussion program, President George W Bush spoke about his 'drink/drugs hell'.

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