14 'Tiger Babes' offered honorary golf club memberships
The list of 'Tiger Babes' now totals fourteen, and their local golf club, has extended offers of honorary membership to all of them. The named invitees for this unprecedented golfing accolade include: Rachel Uchitel, Jaimee Grubbs, Kalika Moquin,...
Read full storyTiger Woods Wants A Beer Summit At The White House - President Obama Replies "Hell No!"
ORLANDO - Eldrick Tont Woods decided to call up the president and ask him if he could go over to the White House and participate in a "Beer Summit" one-on-one, mano-a-mano, vis-a-vis. The president laughed and said "Hell no!" Woods asked him wh...
Read full storyTwilight Star Signed For Eclipse, May Not Return For #4
Taylor Lautner says that he has other things on his mind (translation: Taylor Swift) and may not return to do his role on the fourth Twilight movie but that he had already signed to do the next one. "To me, that's far out into the future as to whe...
Read full storyTiger and Obama spotted aboard 'black helicopter'
With all the air traffic around Copenhagen, Denmark for the International Climate Change Convention, you'd think that no particular aircraft would stand out very much. There's commercial airliners, Gulfstreams, Learjets, and everything in between. Th...
Read full storyScotland declares war on England for "nicking" their sacred "WEE DRAM"!
Sassenachs, better known as the "Old Enemy" England, have really pissed off the pissed Scots this time. The bone-headed English have produced "English Scotch Whisky"! Now this sacred brew is more holy than Braveheart, Haggis, Robbie Burns, The...
Read full storyTiger's, Tapes & Toddlers, Oh My!
With a new bigger news release everyday it seems, there are now rumors of a video of Tiger Woods and one of his partners and maybe even more than two official little Tiger cubs running around. A little over a month ago, no one would have believed...
Read full storyObama accepts Nobel War Prize
US President Barry O'Bama was in Helsinki today to accept the Nobel War Prize. He gave a speech in which he thanked his hosts and explained why he thinks he received the prize. There was controversy when Mr O'Bama, who is of Irish descent, was awa...
Read full storyVirgin Galactic Hijacked By Cylons!
The worlds first space vehicle designed to allow passengers to experience space travel and weightlessness was hijacked today by robotic Cylons demanding that they be flown to somewhere called the "12 Colonies". The Virgin Galactic was just prepar...
Read full storyKatherine Heigl, Adam Lambert To Star In Marilyn Monroe Movie Remake
Katherine Heigl has signed to play the part in the movie that helped make Marilyn famous for over forty years now, "Some Like It Twat!" The movie is where two struggling musicians happen to see the St. Valentines Day Massacre masterminded by Al Ca...
Read full storyThe KKK Says That Tiger Cannot Get Away With Molesting All Them Sweet Innocent White Women
BILOXI, Mississippi - The exalted leader of The Mississippi Bayou Chapter of the Ku Klux Klan the Grand Wizard Dragon Elmer Waldo Dottflicker is one extremely upset redneck. He reportedly said at last nights weekly meeting of the Good Old Boys of...
Read full storyMindy Lawton is 'Wantonly Dim' says Tiger hooker agency
Orlando, Fla - (Labia Babe): Tiger Woods' hooker agency top gal Mindy Lawton was always known by her 'Wantonly Dim' booking codename. "We kinda liked rearranging their names," the brothel's madam explained today. "Mindy sure fitted the bill wit...
Read full storyTiger Woods Writers For TheSpoof May Be Taken To Safe House
A report has came out this morning that several, if not all, of TheSpoof writers may have to be relocated to a "safe house" as Tiger defenders might turn to violence. "I hate to see it done but TheSpoof must protect its people", stated a rep for t...
Read full storyThe Actor Formerly Known As Ashton Kutcher
HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Ashton Kutcher, the actor has surprised many of his friends, relatives, and even enemies by a recent act. Kutcher, 31, the much, much younger husband of actress Demi Moore, 47, has agreed to honor his wife by officially changing...
Read full storyPlayGal Magazine To Purchase Nude Photos of Tiger From Holly Sampson
MALIBU BEACH - Holly Sampson, aka number 7 on Tiger Woods "Scorecard" is presently negotiating with PlayGal Magazine to sell a collection of two dozen nude photos of the worlds most famous golfer. Cypress Klinkenberg, the publisher of PlayGal said...
Read full storyKathy Griffin Turns Down The Lead Role In "The Life Story Of Ann Coulter"
DES MOINES, Iowa - Kathy Griffin was in Des Moines appearing as the keynote speaker at the Annual Convention of The Iowa Crop Rotators Association. She was asked what she liked the best about Iowa. She answered, "Who the hell said that I liked any...
Read full storyMatt Damon Still a Boston "Southy" in South Africa Film
Jumping at the chance to work with Clint Eastwood and without even reading the script, Matt Damon's Boston "South End" accent shines through during his performance in "Invictus". Reportedly assuming that Eastwood's effort would be a western, Damo...
Read full storyEnergizer Bunny Replaces Rudolph on Santa's Sleigh
Retained at the North Pole Neurological clinic for the past two weeks, doctors are still unable to rectify the electrical impulse problems with Rudolph's nose. As a contingency, Santa has contracted with the Energizer Bunny to provide "light guided"...
Read full storyCameron's Avatar Film Features Spoof Characters
Surprised during the London premiere of James Cameron's "Avatar", Queen Mudder, Lynton, Lowton and other London Spoof residents attending the red carpet event, were shocked to see major animated characters in the film literally based on Spoof avatars...
Read full storyRecovery? Don't Bank on it!
Much has been made of the news that UK banks are planning to reward their staff for their 'hard work' this year. Despite protests in the media - these same banks are claiming that they will lose all their 'talent' if they do not offer competitive bon...
Read full storyShock! Woman hasnt slept with Tiger claim!
In a shock announcement last night a woman has stepped forward and claimed to have never had sex with Tiger Woods. The news has stunned all who have watched the Tiger Woods story from the start, as day by day the numbers of women admitting to hav...
Read full story'Satanic Sluts' agency bust
London - (Ass Mess): It launched the careers of scores of badass old slags. But today Nigel Wingrove's soft porn empire has gone folded owing millions. Recent signees Georgina 'Satanic Sluts' Bailiie and Koo Stark's daughter Kate Middleton have b...
Read full storyAdam Lambert, Little Richard Nearly Come To Blows!
Two of the most flamboyant stars of the last 50 years have had a run in according to a recent report in the Star Spangled Banana Magazine. It seems that rock legend, Little Richard did not care much for Adam Lambert's performance on the American Musi...
Read full storyTiger Update: Adam Lambert, Rosie O'Donnell, Blow-Up Betty
Still the reports keep coming in and most people are losing count as others come forward to say they have had an affair with Tiger Woods. Reports are that two reporters from the National Star have dropped dead from exhaustion. Seventeen members...
Read full storyTiger Woods Affairs Causing Marriages To Rebound
With every new story coming out about the "Exploits of the Tiger" and as white blonds continue to come forward, an unexpected thing has happened: It has caused many marriage rebounds! "Oh, I can't get people to answer the door to sign for a pac...
Read full storyQueen pleads with Tiger for 'One Last Shag Before I Die!'
London - (In the Rough): Leeching off the manhood of champions has been the secret of her longevity. But the fountain of HM's youth has now dried up as Tiger Woods' prenup lawyers padlock his putter. Frantic midnight phone calls have gone una...
Read full storyChurch declared Jesus as missing person
The Church of England has announced that, according to a latest research, an average person in the UK doesn't know much about the adult life of Jesus. Michael Robson, 29 a milkman from Bognor Regis admitted that he has no idea what Jesus has done or...
Read full storyBritain's Fattest Man joins the Navy!
At PMQ's yesterday, the armed forces minister Bill Rammell managed to announce that Britain's fattest man had been drafted into the Royal Navy where he'll become the Uk's third aircraft carrier! Luckily for thespoof our reporter had penetrated sec...
Read full storyAlastair Darling anounces Tax cut on black eyebrow dye
In a surprising Pre-Budget report Alastair Darling has sensationally made black eye-brow dye both Tax free and Tax deductible. Other surprising Tax breaks amongst the raft of new proposals in the pre budget report are Tax credits for people with S...
Read full storyBritish opposition demonstrators clash with police
Dozens of people - wow, dozens in a country with over 60 million people, not propaganda this, whew - yes, DOZENS have been arrested in the United Kingdom after violent confrontations between police and anti-government protesters on the streets of the...
Read full storyKnox defence appeal campaign revealed
The Monthly Cycle can reveal today that Murderer Amanda Knox's defence appeal campaign will be based entirely around the fabled "Shaggy" defence. Knox, serving 26 years for brutal Murder, has polarised the world, with the did she or did she conund...
Read full storyTiger Woods Should Not Be Judged Just Yet, Says Andre Agassi
Eight-time Grand Slam winner Andre Agassi says it would be irresponsible to jump to conclusions about Tiger Woods without the full facts, after recent claims about the golfer's private life. Woods, the world's number 1 golfer and philanderer, cras...
Read full storyNaked Tiger Photos a Hoax - Based on Actual Measurement
Recent statements made to Playgirl Magazine regarding photos of Tiger Woods in the buff have been determined a hoax after measurement by measuring experts at a local machine shop. The pics, showing a John Holmes sized whammer, were compared to the...
Read full storyTiger Woods Says Wife Has Ruined His Clubs
Tiger Woods, the world's number 1 golfer and philanderer, has criticised his wife for her part in last week's accident outside his Orlando home, and says she has "completely ruined" his golf clubs. Elin Nordegren, who is originally from Sweden, wh...
Read full storyTiger Woods Transvestite Gay Slur
Frantic action on the golf circuit this afternoon, as it was reported in some newspapers that an eyewitness had come forward to give evidence in the Tiger Woods case to the effect that the world's number one golfist is, in fact, gay. The claim, ma...
Read full storyTiger Denied Gold Medal; Gets PhD Anyway
The United States Congress was ready to award Tiger Woods the Congressional Gold Medal for maintaining a politically correct and dutiful Dudley Do-Right image until today. Recent revelations have painted the Golf Great as more of a back ally consume...
Read full storyWhite House Christmas Wine Menu
This is a busy month in Washington D.C. It seems like Turkey Day was just yesterday and already the White House is preparing for Christmas. This year, the party planners in DC decided to do something a little different. They asked several politicians to manufacture their own wine and bring several bottles which could be served at the dinner. When I heard my good friends Tareq and Michaele Salahi w...
Read full storySandra Bullock May Get "Blind-Sided" by Early Christmas Present
LOS ANGELES, California - Jesse James has won his latest battle in an ongoing custody feud with porn queen and ex-wife Janine Lindemulder, bringing his current wife, Miss Congeniality Sandra Bullock, one step closer to a Proposal that should make her...
Read full storyThe Beatles' 'Birthday' by Jesus Christ brought out for Christmas Day
'They say it's my birthday It isn't my birthday They say it's my birthday They're gonna make much money If it was my birthday Be happy birthday to me (Yeah!) Yes it is a Saturnalia party Yes it is a Saturnalia party Yes it is a Saturnalia party The Pope would like you to dance (Birthday) He takes a cha-cha-cha-chance (Birthday) That you don't live in France (Birthday) Where they...
Read full storyJennifer Aniston To Appear In A Reality Show Titled, "Hey How Come I Can't Get Me A Friggin Boyfriend?"
BEVERLY HILLS - Jennifer Aniston has just been signed to appear in The Brevity Channel's new reality show, Hey How Come I Can't Get Me A Friggin' Boyfriend? Aniston who is quite attractive, witty, and can cook a lot of different meals says she has...
Read full storyMore Tiger partners coming forward
The present number of people to have claimed intimate romantic relationships with Tiger Woods has climbed to 3,428 and more are coming forward. The latest confessor is Frances Bertinelli, an Italian seamstress who claimed to have met Tiger at a F...
Read full storyThe World's Most Famous Madam Heidi Fleiss Disses "Tiger's Girls"
MALIBU BEACH - The most famous madam in the world, Heidi Fleiss was interviewed at her beach house. She said that the so-called "Golf Girls" have no business talking about what happened between them and Tiger Woods. She said that if those girls wo...
Read full storyTiger Woods Spotted Drifting on Giant Iceberg
PERTH, Australia - Tiger Woods is perched atop a massive iceberg more than twice the size of New York's Manhattan island and is now drifting slowly toward Australia, scientists announced on Wednesday. The golf phenomenon cleaved himself from the p...
Read full storyFulton Farnsworth Fludge - An Obituary
Known to his friends as Fludger, Fulton Farnsworth Fludge was a prominent figure in Yorkshire sporting circles. He played cricket, usually at the lowest possible, as well as 23rd division Sunday morning football. His mediocre talents were spread acro...
Read full storyPorn Star Holly Sampson's New Book Is Entitled, "Tiger's Stimulus Package"
LOS ANGELES - Golf Gal #7 in Tiger Woods program Holly Sampson has just written the fastest book to ever be published in the history of book Publishing. Sampson's 197 page book is entitled, Tiger's Stimulus Package and has already had advance sale...
Read full storyTiger Gal Pal Mindy Lawton All Of A Sudden Is A Restaurant Owner
ORLANDO - One of Tiger Woods "Golf Girls" who only last week was working as an $8 an hour waitress at Patty Cakes Pancake Palace is now suddenly the owner of Patty Cakes Pancake Palace. Lawton told a reporter for The Pensacola Gazette Searcher tha...
Read full storyOJ Simpson: Tiger's just the fall guy!
Lovelock, Nevada - (Gonads): "Poor guy, like he's OD'd on all that Elin PMS!" a thoughtful OJ Simpson confided in inmates at Lovelock Correctional Center today. "Sure is called the seven year bitch! Single women can smell it a mile off. Turns the...
Read full story