US President Barry O'Bama was in Helsinki today to accept the Nobel War Prize. He gave a speech in which he thanked his hosts and explained why he thinks he received the prize.
There was controversy when Mr O'Bama, who is of Irish descent, was awarded the prize back in October, because he was still in the first year of his presidency and had not had time to make an impact in the sphere of warfare.
During his speech, he said, "I am very honoured to have received this prize. I hope that I can live up to your expectations and do my best to work towards world war. Many great people have won this prize over the years, including Hitler, Stalin and both George Bushes.
"I know that there are many people throughout the world who are angry at the US for becoming such a peace-loving nation full of wossy hippies lately. We all remember the world famous September 10th flower arranging competition in New York, which led many nations to join us in our search for poppies in Afghanistan.
"We can acknowledge that oppression will always be with us. We can admit the intractability of depravation. We can understand that there will be war - for that is the story of human progress; that is the hope of all the world; and at this moment of challenge, that must be our work here on Earth."