
Angelina Jolie to eat some more
"Please baby, just one more mouth full" - Brad pursing his gorgeous kissable lips begging Angie to eat the crispy green salad stabbed onto the 24 carat gold fork gripped in his masculine hand. "Please just for me, and darling Jennifer is not watching."...
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Scarlett Johansson a Boy
Oh please, now I have heard everything. If Scarlett is a boy, she is a darn fine looking "boy". She doesn't even look "butch" for crying out loud.
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Senior President George Bush Collapses on Golf Course After Naked Antonella Barba Shows Him Her Birdie
While vacationing and playing golf at a California country club, former President George H.W. Bush collapsed on the course. He was taken to a hospital, treated, and released. The former President was playing golf with some Hollywood celebrities w...
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President Bush Cuts Funding for Plan Columbia, Cites his Inability to Score Good Blow
Washington, DC- In a surprise move, President Bush, during his South American tour, announced that the United States would be cutting funding for Plan Columbia. Plan Columbia, a joint drug reduction program with ally Columbia, in which the United St...
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Pervy Israeli ambassador syndrome spreads to London
London - (Ass Press): Hapless Israeli ambassador to El Salvador and S&M aficionado Tzuriel Refael appears not to be the only perv on the international diplomatic circuit.
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FBI's missing computers sold on ebay
Adding insult to injury, laptop computers missing from the FBI's recent inventory have appeared on Ebay.
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George Washington's flaccid flop is Holy Roman Emperor's stud fee
Ireland - (Rioters): Embarrassment at Ireland's top equestrian business The Coolmore Stud has reached epic proportions following the failure of last year's star three year old colt George Washington to produce more semen than a shagged-out gn...
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Actor Fred Thompson To Join Presidential Race
Actor Fred Dalton Thompson, more famous recently as a member of the United States Senate and the District Attorney on the Law and Order television series, announced today that he will join the race for the Republican Presidential Nomination in 2008.
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Antonella Barba Celebrates Idol Boot With Playboy Mansion Tour and Hefner Party
Antonella Barba, the former American Idol Contestant whose pictures have been all over the internet, celebrated her being voted off the show this week in a strange fashion. Her weekend was spent at the home of Hugh Hefner, more commonly known as The...
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Threat to church phone masts that delay porn
London - (Rotters): The Law Lords are to hear an appeal this week that says the Church of England's money-spinning idea of putting mobile phone masts on steeples contravenes the spirit of the Human Frights Act because of delayed gratification in...
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Israeli ambassador embarrasses El Salvador S&M cult
Tel Aviv - (ReUterus): An internationally renowned El Salvador bondage and fetish cult has protested to its Foreign Ministry that the recently appointed Israeli ambassador Tzuriel Refael is an embarrassment to the Diplomatic Corpse after the envoy wa...
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UPS robbed: NASA mind-reading sensors taken
A shipment of "noncontact" sensors designed by the National Aeronautics and Space Administration was stolen last week from a United Parcel Service delivery vehicle, NASA reports today in a press release.
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Klingon - the new language of environmentalism
Jyrki Kasvi, a member of the Green League political party who is seeking re-election to parliament in Finland, has translated his campaign website into Klingon. The fact the language has no words for green, environment, recycling or global warming is...
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Red Nose Day 2007 Under Threat
Red Nose Day celebrations, scheduled for this Friday, 16th March 2007, could be under threat, due to complaints from people with big red noses.
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Al Gore Running For President, Aided by Most Googled Names; Britney Spears, Antonella Barba and Paris Hilton.
Al Gore has today announced he's running for President and, in a horribly misguided attempt for popularity, he has asked some of Google's most searched for names to help him in the election.
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Charlotte Church Red-Faced Over Horse Revelations
Singer-turned-TV presenter Charlotte Church has had a major setback after visting her prenatal clinic last week, when it emerged that she was not 'with child', but 'with foal'.
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Vegans Will Die Out Soon Due to Natural Selection
Researchers analysing a fossilized toilet claim to have uncovered the first direct evidence that modern day vegans will die out through natural selection any time now. Let's face it, nature is red in tooth and claw, and just 7000 years ago, anyon...
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Warning to Boston Hotties: Tom Brady Wants To Be Your Baby's Dad
Not long ago, NFL quarterback Tom Brady broke up with his long time hot girlfirend (the one that did all of the credit card commercials with him). Then, she announced that she was pregnant with his child. This did not bring them back together. B...
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John Terry's Grandad Dead In Gangland Slaying
A huge black cloud of despondency hung over Stamford Bridge at the weekend, when it was announced that the grandfather of Chelsea captain John Terry had been found dead at home.
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Purity Dances and Abstinence Balls Highlight of Just Say No Campaign
Fundamentalist Christians have begun a new movement to encourage young girls to wait until marriage before engaging in sexual contact. Called "abstinence balls" or "purity dances," these events end with the teenager signing a con...
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Athletes With Big Ears Targeted for London Olympics
Sir Gary Lineker has launched a campaign to find athletes with big ears to compete in the 2012 London Olympic Games, to be held only in London. Lineker, Minister for Sport Richard Caborn, and The Spoof began the &quo...
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Compulsory Begging Lessons for British Kids
All children in UK schools must be taught how to beg in major European languages. The government believes language skills to be more important than sport, once seen as their way out in the spin leading up to 2012. By 2012,
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Castro's Christmas Day Death Kept Secret
Habana, Cuba - According to Turner North Broadcasting maximum leader for life Fidelito Castro died on Christmas day and Raul Castro has decided to keep the news of his brother's death a military secret. Cuban leaders have declared that mention...
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Ex champ Lewis set for ring return
Lennox Lewis is on the verge of signing a new deal that will see him return to the ring - as a round-card girl at the MGM Grand Hotel in Las Vegas on May 5.
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Did Mourinho abuse referee in Jawa?
JOSE MOURINHO has denied referee Mike Riley's claims he swore at him in Portuguese in the players' tunnel after Sunday's FA Cup game between Chelsea and Tottenham Hotspur, which finished in a 3-3 draw.
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Hydrochloric Acid Found In Baby Food Additives
Additives for baby food have been found to contain hydrochloric acid. The Spoof examined 99 baby food additives, and found only one was free of hydrochloric acid. Some otherwise harmless colourings, artificial sweeteners and...
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Robbie Williams - Jealous
Not only is Robbie Williams jealous over the fantastic crazy things Britney is getting up to (he cannot copy her though), he is a mommy's boy too!...
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Wrestling - Real or fake?
TAGTEAM Batista & Undertaker take on Shaun Michaels & John Cena in a heavyweight wrestling match on Sunday evening (sometime on the GMT line) - exact time not known.
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RUGBY - A man's sport or is it?
Reporting from Twickenham: ENGLAND VS FRANCE. A widely watched rugby game played this weekend, with England proving to be the VICTOR (VICTORIA) of this match.
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Ed Nabors - I soiled myself when I heard I'd won.
Ed Nabors told reporters that he 'shat' himself on Wednesday, after learning that he had one of the winning tickets for the record $390 million Mega Millions lottery jackpot.
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BBC to bring back This Is Your Life - Yates books Levy
Mark Thompson the Director General of the BBC has announced that the BBC is to start filming a new series of This Is Your Life.
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Naomi Campbell vs. Tyra Banks
Latest modelling news just in, Naomi may be suing Tyra for making fun of her "not fat" outbursts and making a mockery of a real "disease" - FATNESS!...
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Antonella Barba Enters Monastery
Heartbroken and dejected Antonella Barba, America Idol hopeful, has announced her entrance into a female monastery. She's decided to throw in the towel and take a vow of silence.
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Katie Holmes has a new Mom - Tom!
Is there no end to the lengths that Tom Cruise will go to keep his tabs on Katie Holmes (just in case you did not know which Katie I was referring to)?...
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Chris "The Beheader" Simon Gets 25 days in the Penalty Box!
LI Isle's Chris Simon appeared to be more brutal than American Idol's Simon when he delivered his two handed executioner's blow in a supposed "game". For his act of savage attack, he will be sitting out 25 games. "Most felo...
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Palestineans and Israelis Shocked at Their Children's Psychological Scarring
Child Psychologists from both sides of the Israeli-Palestinean conflict are reporting that children from both warring communities are suffering from hopelessness, trauma and violent tendencies.
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Halliburton Moves CEO From Houston to Dubai
Halliburton, famous for its Fudd-like former CEO and for robbing America and Iraq blind during its former Elmerical CEO's War has announced that its corporate headquarters will be moved from one oil field to another.
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Scientists Find The Uncommon Newt
The common newt is known for its choice of a mate for life and its unusual ability to cooperate with other creatures.
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The Rite of Exorcism of Conservatives
Exorcism of a Conservative Entity is a dangerous and difficult procedure, and can only be performed by a House or Senate Democrat who has at least a 90 percent progressive voting record.
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Sex shop for dwarves!
London- Deep in the heart of London's red light district amid the sleazy neon and whispered requests something revolutionary is turning heads and clucking modest tongues.
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"I'm a Pothead," An Easter Head Admits
The Spoof reporter, who had been thinking that this would be a routine interview with a staid Easter Head, was shocked to hear this news.
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Jacques Chirac Surrenders, again...
PARIS, March 10 - After more than four decades of leading his country whilst he stayed behind the lines, pretending to be a politician, and a dozen years as president, Jacques Chirac has surrendered from politics on Sunday, but he did not endorse Nic...
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Anti-Birth Control Activists Cite Possibility of Fifth Baldwin Brother as Reason to Avoid Contraception
The National Anti-birth Control Organization, Bring on the Babies (BOB) has begun its most recent campaign in the streets of Hollywood by citing the possible implications birth control has had on the entertainment world.
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