UPS robbed: NASA mind-reading sensors taken

Funny story written by Skews Me

Monday, 12 March 2007

image for UPS robbed: NASA mind-reading sensors taken

A shipment of "noncontact" sensors designed by the National Aeronautics and Space Administration was stolen last week from a United Parcel Service delivery vehicle, NASA reports today in a press release.

"The guys knew exactly what they wanted," said the shaken driver in an interview shortly after the robbery.

The sensors can detect at a distance and through clothing the electrical signals sent to the larynx when silently thinking to oneself. Software designed to convert the signals into recognizable speech was also stolen.

In related news, a string of muggings this weekend involving patrons of automatic teller machines for their ATM cards stymied Las Vegas police until today's announcement.

"When we couldn't find signs of ATM tampering, we thought we might be dealing with psychic criminals channelling the victims' PIN numbers," said Police Chief Hugh G. Rollings. "With the news from NASA, it all makes sense now."

For more information, visit NASA's website.

Copyright © 2007, SkewsMe

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more