Due To The Skyrocketing Price of Gasoline, Lots of Americans Are Selling Their Cars and Buying Horse and Buggy Teams
QUAKER OATS, Pennsylvania - (Satire News) - With the price of gasoline hitting an astounding $8 a gallon in California, and $7 a gallon in Connecticut, many middle class and poor families are selling their automobiles and resorting to horse and buggi…
Read full storyLondon is Polio’s Guinea Pig
Polio has been discovered in London’s sewer system! YAY! The powers that be were worried that Covid hadn’t killed enough people or created enough fear to keep people servile and worried that they could die any minute. They brought out variants…
Read full storyTrump Still Insists That Climate Change Is A Hoax As The Temperature In Anchorage, Alaska Hit 113 Degrees
ANCHORAGE, Alaska - (Satire News) - The stupidest man in America (Donald Trump) is still at it with his cockamamie story about Global Warming being nothing more than a hoaxalistic hoax invented by Nancy Pelosi and her California cohorts. The GOP f…
Read full storyAre you a Tired Christian? Try That There Pagan Breath Awareness
It was developed by a wise yellar-skinned man who lived before Christ. Poor guy missed out on Christ's teachings-might have learned something. Anyway, sit quietly in a chair-breathe in your nose, down toward a relaxed stomach, and then breathe…
Read full storyLadies Try New Fluorescent Makeup - Made From Jellyfish - For White Skin Only
A very buxom, blonde female spokesman, said, "Some creatures in the sea are fluorescent, and now TamiJo Products of Knoxville, brings you fluorescent makeup, made from Jellyfish cells. Just glow at night out on the deck, or at your local barbecue pla…
Read full storyMost Airlines Cancel Hundreds of Flights Due To A Shortage of Fuel, Pretzels, and Pilots
DALLAS - (Satire News) - The airline industry is having fits as the amount of passengers has fallen by 43.7% in just the past week. A spokesperson for the industry, Wanda "Jet Lag" Sippatinski, 58, said that as a result Delta has had to cancel mos…
Read full storyRussia Surrenders To Ukraine
After a two-month battle to invade and take over Ukraine, with 35,00 Russian soldiers dead and 12 Russian generals killed, Russia surrendered to Ukraine. But attempting to save face, Vladimir Putin announced that it was never a surrender, as it w…
Read full storyWhy Are There Men? Early Life Had Only Females
Self-reproducing Life existed for 2-3 billion years before there were Men. Let's call this self-reproducing life, Female, as it was able to reproduce by itself and was not Male and did not need a Male. Then, Nature, the Creative Force, etc, de…
Read full storyBioengineered Women's Breast Milk to Be Next Big Drink
Scientists in Biogeotechnology expect that in the next ten years. Biotech companies will be selling women's breast milk as a new, very lucrative product. It will be an anonymous genetic blend - the milk of several unidentified women-and produced…
Read full storyThe New York Jets Are Considering Moving To Havana, Cuba
NEW YORK CITY - (Sports Satire) - The owner of The New York Jets, Robert Wood "Woody" Johnson IV, says that he has had it with his team's lack of fans attending Jets games. Woody noted that his team last year finished with a lousy 3-14 record, and…
Read full storyFrance has gone crazy against freedom
France’s top administrative court ruled Tuesday against allowing body-covering “burkini” swimwear in public pools for religious reasons, arguing that it violates the principle of government neutrality toward religion. France has just violated a ba…
Read full storyTrump's 817 Fake Electors Now All Say That He Personally Appointed Them
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) - After many hours of long, grueling, arduous investigating a Senate Investigatory Agency has shown that the 817 presidential race electors that the Trumptard personally (and illegally) appointed all now say that they…
Read full storyMelania Trump and LeBron James Will Be Traveling To Slovenia To Visit Melania’s Family
LOS ANGELES - (Satire News) - Melania is as happy as a puppy with three pee-pees after her BFF, LeBron James has agreed to accompany her on her trip to visit her family members in Slovenia. The former Mrs. Golfer-in-Chief, was asked why her husban…
Read full storyIt Is So Damn Hot In Arizona That The Grand Canyon's Colorado River Is Only ¼ of An Inch Deep
DEVIL'S ASS, Arizona - (Satire News) - The temps in and around the Grand Canyon area have been hitting between 108 and 113 on a daily basis. Reports from Arizona rangers are that the canyon's fire ant population has literally gone up in flames.
Read full storyA 19-Year-Old Norwegian Basketball Player Who Can Dunk As Good As Any NBA Player Gets A Tryout With The San Antonio Spurs
SAN ANTONIO, Texas - (Sports Satire) - One of Coach Gregg Popvich's basketball scouts came across an astoundingly amazing female basketball player in Oslo, Norway. The young lady, who is only 19, can dunk a ball with the ease of any NBA player in…
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