Pay To Play Into College And The White House
Stop picking on Hollywood mothers with big smiles for trying to buy their kid into elite colleges. Indeed, it's painful enough for the mother to admit their kid is hopelessly slow. Why didn't they hire tutors to bridge the gap during high school?...
Read full storyMan tries to contact Tutankhamun by ouija board, gets trapped in head of David Childress
A wrong-headed attempt to contact Tutankhamun by ouija board became literally that for New York resident Alan Finkelkraut who is now trapped in the head of alien conspiracist tv-personality and cryptozoologist, David Childress. It is thought that...
Read full storyMan invents time machine, travels 20 seconds backwards in time.
Dave Bennet, Utah, admits that he “could have made more” of his degree in theoretical physics, after he succeeded in sending himself backwards in time by twenty seconds last week. “Yeah, a lot of people are asking me "was it worth it?" I got to g...
Read full storyMPs play charades
During a break in a recent Brexit meeting, members of the cabinet and leading Brexiteers were recorded playing a game of the popular parlour game Charades. The transcript of the recording is as follows: David Davis: Is it a film? Theresa May: It'...
Read full storyArticle 50 To Be Revoked As England Prepares For Civil War
Prime Minister Theresa May has told senior members of the government that their long-term plan regarding the country's relationship with the EU is almost complete, and that she will announce the revocation of Article 50 in the middle of next week.
Read full storyEyecam 'Thought Camera' Takes Pictures Of What You Think
A new camera that will shortly be on the market, takes photographic images of, not only what is directly in front of the aperture, but also the very thoughts that are in your mind, or, to describe the process even more specifically, 'what you are thi...
Read full storyCharleston Man Doesn't Just Talk the Small Talk; He Walks It
Unlike some who make small talk about the weather, office life, and lunch while thinking of greater things, Trey Hill of Charleston, South Carolina, actually walks the small talk, in that his life is truly and entirely composed of only banal and tri...
Read full storyCeltics Lose When Kyrie Irving Tries to Kick the Ball into the Hoop
The Boston Celtics lost to the Philadelphia 76ers Wednesday after Kyrie Irving missed a last second shot that he tried to drop kick into the hoop. “For the last shot, I called a play to get the ball to Kyrie, who would then drop kick the ball into...
Read full storyBuffalo Bills To Spend Summer Vacation Relaxing
The Buffalo Bills have announced that the whole roster of Bills players will be spending from now until the start of next season in 'relaxation mode'. The Bills finished in second place in the AFC East last semester, but have resisted the urge to...
Read full storyKamala “Breath” Harris And The Killer Bees: Brown, Beto, Bernie, Booker And Biden.
BILLINGSGATE POST: Many of the names of Democrats who Kamala “Breath” Harris had (and now has) a leg up on, begin with the letter “B.” As has been acknowledged by Harris, she once had a leg up on Willie Brown when Brown was a political player in...
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