There were 370 spoof news stories published in December 2012. A selection of the most popular stories is shown here. You can use the calendar on the right hand side to get news stories from a day in this month.
Monkey Found in Ikea Parking Lot Is Toronto Entrepreneur
This was monkey business, with a capital B. Turns out Darwin (yep, that's the monkey's name), who was wearing a shearling coat as he roamed the parking lot, was doing some modeling for his clothing business, which -- you guessed it -- manufactur...
Read full storySanta Is No Longer Making a List and Checking It Twice
But don't take that to mean you should be naughty instead of nice. Spoof reporter Gail Farrelly did an email interview with Santa Claus and found out that there IS still a Naughty-or-Nice List (NNList) at the North Pole, but Santa no longer prep...
Read full storyCelebrity New Year's Resolutions
Well it's that time of the year again, when everyone in the free world makes their New Year's Resolutions. Experts on the subject report that a little over 27 percent of the individuals who make the resolutions actually end up keeping them; with most going by the wayside within the first two days of the new year. Last year one of the biggest resolutions was to stop eating so many carbs. Anot...
Read full storyNASA Admits Mars Rover Curiosity Was Site of Holiday Bash
It was a public relations disaster of intergalactic proportions as NASA had to use a huge chunk of its budget to clean up after the party and restore the scientific equipment on the rover back to normal status. Rumors of a party had been swirlin...
Read full storyX-Factor's Demi Lovato Denies The CeCe Frey Lesbian Rumors
HOLLYWOOD - CeCe Frey will not have a shot at X-Factor's $5 million first prize since she will not be in next week's semi-finals. The native of Illinois, who wore her patented leopard print make up on her face and upper left thigh, was the first o...
Read full storyFirst Leaked Topless Ultrasound Image of Future Monarch Published By Italian Magazine
An Italian magazine says it has no regrets after publishing nude photographs or Kate Middleton's unborn baby. The magazine "Il Surrendi" published images they claim are ultrasound photos of the future monarch "topless" and lounging around on his o...
Read full storyTeenage Granddaughter's Tattoo Mars Christmas Festivities
72 year old Mary MCDonnell is dreading the Christmas holidays this year. For the first time in 19 years she finds no delight in decorating the tree, writing out Christmas cards and planning menus. It is a McDonnell family tradition that Mary's so...
Read full storyA List of The 10 Worst Christmas Toys For 2012
The Christmas season is fast approaching and merchants and retailers are already trying to figure out which toys will be this holiday season's best sellers. According to three of the biggest retail chains in the United States this year promises to be a banner year for such toys as Jake's Musical Pirate Ship, LeapPad 2 Explorer, Nerf Laser Tag Blasters, Lalaloopsy Silly Hair Star Doll - Harmony...
Read full storyBearded Men Ban From Children's Play Areas Justified Claims Mayor
A ban on all males sporting beards entering areas designated for children came into effect midnight yesterday in the small town of Queens near Seattle Washington State. The law, passed by Mayor Kate Policunti is aimed to deter child molesters and...
Read full storyFord Offers 'Ejection Seating' to Fix Recalled Escapes
Dearborn, Michigan - It's been a rough road for the introduction of 2013 Ford Escape. First, the newly designed SUV was recalled because its gas pedal had a tendency to get stuck in the carpeting at awkward moments. Another recall was required for fl...
Read full storyThe World's Largest Landfill
PHOENIX, Arizona - The state of Arizona has just announced plans to build what will be the largest landfill in the world. Arizona Governor Jan Brewer stated that the dump is being built on a 20 mile by 20 mile tract of land that is part of the fam...
Read full storyThings in Egypt Looking Very Ugly Says Recently Returned Visitor From Cairo
A Florida man, recently returned from a vacation to Egypt, says that things in Egypt, and especially in the capital city Cairo, are looking "ugly". Dave Capeshdi from Palm Beach county claims he was shocked at some of the things he saw on the stre...
Read full storyKirstie Alley Hates Her New Nickname
HOLLYWOOD HILLS - Since her appearance on Dancing With The Stars Kirstie Alley has stated that she very rarely goes out of her house; except to go to her backyard and water her prized petunias. Alley who has a proclivity for gaining 100 pounds, lo...
Read full storyMike Tyson is not becoming a transsexual; he's just feeling his feminine side!
An African spoof site has reported that ex-boxer, ear biter and general ex-hooligan, Mike Tyson, is undergoing a sex-change operation! Well this spoof site can reveal that it is just not true because Mike is just feeling his feminine side right now a...
Read full storyCheryl Cole Says Simon Cowell Broke Her Heart and She Wants $2.3 Million
LOS ANGELES - Cheryl Cole was back in the City of Angels and she is as mad as a She-Devil. The British singer was one of the original judges on Simon Cowell's American version of the X-Factor. But she was fired after a few shows due to the fact...
Read full storyJohn Mayer To Break Up With Katy Perry?
WEST HOLLYWOOD - Well it appears that the word on the streets of West Holly, as former California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger refers to it, is that John "The Player" Mayer, 34, will soon be dumping 28-year-old Katy Perry. The couple who have la...
Read full storyA List of Christmas Television Specials For 2012
Every Christmas season the various television networks dish out their banquet of Christmas-themed specials. Some of the all-time favorite annual Christmas shows of years gone by included those by Andy Williams, Perry Como, Bob Hope, and The Three Stooges. Back in the 60s and 70s most of the television holiday sets consisted of some Christmas trees, some lights, Christmas ornaments, tons of...
Read full storyHank Williams Jr., To Release A Gay And Lesbian Album
NASHVILLE - Hank Williams Jr., says that he did not mean to offend gays and lesbians when he said that there are no gays and lesbians on farms, ranches, and out in the backwoods. Hank Jr., who was nicknamed Bocephus by his father the legendary cou...
Read full storySofia Vergara To Appear in The 2013 All-Nude Mayan Apocalypse Calendar
VENICE BEACH, California - The star of the hit sit-com Modern Family, Sofia Vergara was having lunch at The Giggling Guacamole Restaurant in Venice Beach when she received a phone call. The caller was Axton P. Zipplecross, Jr, who is the owner and...
Read full storyA Look At Australia's Astounding Talking Kangaroo
BRISBANE, Australia - The Kangaroo News Agency of Australia has just released a press bulletin. According to KNA reporter Tellaringo Waggaberra, an Australian kangaroo rancher, Chamberlain Cowbrewster owns what is being touted as the most astonish...
Read full storyMr. Fiscal Cliff Vows to Change His Name in 2013
The 34-year-old held a press conference in Grand Central Station in NYC yesterday to let the world know of his plans. Awaiting the start of the press conference, the crowd was entertained by the dulcet tones of the late Johnny Cash singing "A Bo...
Read full storyWas suicided Enron executive the original 'Fiscal Cliff'?
Sugar Land, Texas - There are new moves this weekend to exhume the remains of former Enron wiz kid J Clifford 'Cliff' Baxter who died in a reported two-bullet/rat shot 'suicide' at a Sugar Land car lot in 2002. Lawyers acting for a Texas coroner's...
Read full storyMy life as a man #37
Another day, another opportunity to fall on my ass! A gal I've known since grade school called me this afternoon to ask if I'd like to get together for lunch tomorrow, to talk about the old days.... OK, before I begin, if you've not read any of my other stories, you may be unaware that no woman I have ever known EVER calls me to ask me to go to lunch, to talk about old times with her, or any...
Read full storyMarijuana Filled Footballs To Be Tossed Over The Border Fence
NOGALES, Mexico - The ad in The Nogales Daily News stated that Señor (NAME DELETED BY EDITOR) was looking for some young men who can toss a football like Eli Manning of the New York Giants and who can catch it like Jay Witten of the Dallas Cowboys.
Read full storyMike Tyson Has Secret Reverse Sex Change Operation And Is Now A Man Again
After reports from African media outlets that former undisputed Heavyweight Champion of the World Mike Tyson had undergone a sex change operation to become a woman the former bruiser has undergone a further operation reversing the first operation an...
Read full storyWBC fight card 'Twin Bill' features Twins' womb fight
LAS VEGAS, Nevada (ABSNN Sports) - The World Boxing Council has the entire sporting world agog at the news that Caesar's Palace will host the very first WBC Championship fight between two unknown, and as yet, unnamed twins in their mother's womb! Th...
Read full storyVoyager Spacecraft Returns
Scientists all over the world are trying to explain the sudden appearance of the Voyager spacecraft, orbiting the moon. NASA and other space agencies are scrambling to find a logical explanation, while UFOlogists have stepped forward to explain ti al...
Read full storyBloomberg Confuses Gun Rights With Gay Rights & Blows His Brains Out
New York - Mayor Michael Bloomberg was released from Bellevue Hospital today after being treated for what's being called "a firearm mishap." It appears that the mayor mistook a pistol for a penis and discharged the gun into his cranium. Who will...
Read full storyHot Air Balloonist's Dream Is To Fly To The Moon In His Balloon
POCATELLO, Idaho - Dontavian "Buzz" Buttonbocker, 53, says that ever since he was in grade school he has always been fascinated with hot air balloons. The Pocatello native actually built his first hot air balloon at the age of 9. He said that it w...
Read full storyChristmas Gifts For Hollywood Celebrities
One thing that can be said about famous celebrities is that they pretty much have everything they've ever needed or ever wanted. With the money they make on songs, movies, television, books, comedy performances, and commercials they could practically all retire and never have to pick up a guitar, a script, or a microphone ever again. But of course, like 97.3 percent of them say it is not abo...
Read full storyPutin and Obama discuss Mayan Prophecy
Details of the first phone convocation between Russian President Vladimir Putin and US President Barack Obama since the recent US election have emerged. The pair spoke about Syria and the opposing view that they hold on what President Assad is do...
Read full storyThe Highlights of 2012
Every year, going back to the beginning of time, has had its highlights and even its lowlights. Tittle Tattle Tonight's Senior Reporter Pico de Gallo has poured over hundreds of stories which appeared in 2012, in such celebrity publications and entertainment news programs as Bedroom Pillow Talk, iRumors, Hollywood Innuendo, The Tinsel Town Times Tribune, The Cucamonga Chit Chat Chronicle, and T...
Read full storyIan Somerhalder and Nina Dobrev Deny They Lip Sync on The Vampire Diaries
LOS ANGELES - Ian Somerhalder and Nina Dobrev, the stars of The Vampire Diaries, which is set in the fictitious town of Mystic Falls, Virginia are pretty upset with an article that appeared in the supermarket tabloid Just Saying. Somerhalder who s...
Read full storyNear-sighted dolphin mistakes child for Honey Boo Boo and bites her!
ORLANDO, Florida (ABSNN) - A dolphin named Sally bit a child who was feeding her in a tank at Orlando's Sea World Sunday. Police immediately arrested the dolphin who told them, "I'm so sorry! I'm so near-sighted, I thought the little girl was Honey...
Read full storyThe Madonna - Rihanna Feud Is Getting Ugly
BROOKLYN - Madonna, 54, was spotted sitting at a table at The Plastered Platypus Lounge with her son, er boy-toy, Brahim Zaibat, 25. She was wearing dark glasses which was unusual since the PP is a very dimly lit establishment. A source close t...
Read full storyUneaten Yogurt Mourned
An unopened yogurt quietly expired last night after spending several days lodged between a shriveled tomato and a jar of mayonnaise in a Florida mans refrigerator. The yogurt, purchased in mid November, was survived by a can of diet coke and a blo...
Read full storyBig glasses make wine taste better
If you want your wine to taste nice it's best to wear a big pair of glasses rather than a small monocle or nothing at all. Researchers at Spexarus University got hundreds of volunteers to wear different sizes of spectacles when tasting a range of...
Read full storySales of Pippa Middleton's Tell All Book Go Through The Roof
CHICAGO - A spokesperson for The Fig Leaf Bookstore, which is one of the nation's largest, has stated that Pippa Middleton's new tell-all book, titled Pippa's Royal Rumblings is literally flying off the bookshelves. The book which Len Goodman, Bar...
Read full storyFox Moving Into The Education-Oriented Cartoon World
NEW YORK CITY - In a move that top executives said should have been done years ago, Fox Television has decided to move into the educational realm of cartoon shows. Television Director of Cartooning Panola "Kitty" Frinkfoyer, 43, has issued a direc...
Read full storyJohnny Depp and Kristen Stewart To Star In the X-Rated Movie, The Landing Strip
HOLLYWOOD - TouchRock Films in association with G-Spot Pictures has just announced that production will soon begin on a new Johnny Depp - Kristen Stewart motion picture. The erotically romantic movie titled The Landing Strip is based on the book b...
Read full storyBritish Lords Promise Enquiry Into Child Porn
The British House of Lords have promised a full and complete investigation into the availability of child pornography within the United Kingdom. Lord Cock of Dumbshire announced "It is simply appalling. It is totally unacceptable. I find is simpl...
Read full storyKobe Bryant Begs Magic Johnson For Advice
LOS ANGELES - This past summer, on paper at least, the Los Angeles Lakers were supposed to have been sitting at 22-0 right now, but instead they hold a below .500 record of 9-13. And Kobe Bean Bryant, the star of the Lakers, and according to him,...
Read full storyMayans Revise Doomsday Prediction: Now Jan 21, 2013
BILLINGSGATE POST: The ancient Mayans only surviving doomsday predictor gave the world a brief reprieve today when High Chief Hokum announced from his office in the Yucatan that due to a conflict with the Gregorian Calendar, the end of the world has...
Read full storyOlivia Black fired by 'Pawn Stars' shop causes surprise
People in the public were surprised to hear that Olivia Black was fired by a pawn shop after racy photos of her surfaced online. 'Pawn Stars' shop runs a reality television show on the History Channel. Olivia Black's employment record for '...
Read full storyThe World's Largest Swamp Discovered In New Mexico
TRUTH OR CONSEQUENCES, New Mexico - A team of oil surveyors who were looking for a possible site for a pipe line which would bring oil from Mexico into the United States recently made an amazing discovery. The chief surveyor identified as Packwood...
Read full storyKate Gosselin and Russell Brand's PDA At The La Brea Tar Pits
LA BREA, California - Kate Gosselin and Russell Brand, who broke up in August of 2011, were seen walking hand-in-hand at the famed La Brea Tar Pits. According to several eyewitnesses, Kate was wearing a Pittsburgh Steelers jersey, Daisy Duke short...
Read full storyWhy Is Secretary of State Hillary Clinton Dodging Questions About Benghazi?
Why is Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton, dodging questions about the 9/11 attacks in Benghazi? First she claimed to have picked up some sort of vague virus during her 24/7 international travels for the last four years and was supposed to be resti...
Read full storyTaylor Swift: I Am No Yoko Ono!
NEW ORLEANS - Taylor Swift took a quick trip down to the city known as The Big Easy to pick up some of her favorite food, Chicken Gumbo A La Creole. Taylor has said that she has eaten Chicken Gumbo A La Creole in Milwaukee, Montpelier, and Minneap...
Read full storyWV anti-bullying law unfair to Evangelical, straight kids says pastor
CHARLESTON, West Virginia (ABSNN) - Jeremy Dys of The Family Policy Council told state legislators Friday that West Virginia's anti-bullying policy in its 55 county school districts "is unfair to evangelical students." "We have been forced by an u...
Read full storyAlabama Man to Carry First Rape-Baby
Birmingham, AL - An Alabama man will be the first in the country to have a fetus which had been conceived through a legitimate rape, implanted into the wall of his stomach lining, saving the fetus from being aborted. He has been the only such man to...
Read full storyAshton Kutcher Finally Files For Divorce From Demi "The Cougar" Moore
MARINA DEL REY - After waiting and hoping that his wife would make the first move and file for divorce, Ashton Kutcher, 34, has gone ahead and filed for divorce from Demi Moore, 50, after waiting patiently for one whole year. The star of Two and A...
Read full storyRob Pattinson Refutes The Claim He Dated Bristol Palin
WEST HOLLYWOOD - The star of the Twilight Series movies, Rob Pattinson has stated emphatically that he never dated Bristol "The Pistol" Palin as Joy Behar of The View has suggested. RPattz said that if he were to sit down and make out a list of fe...
Read full storyGun Lobby says Grade Schoolers Must be Armed for Their Own Protection
Pro-gun association CEO, and Nobel Peace Prize nominee wannabe, Gunther "Gunn" Bullet, issued a special Saturday night announcement that his organization will lobby Congress on Monday, urging lawmakers to fund the development, production, and nationw...
Read full storyTurkish Simpsons are blasphemous!
The Turkish version of one of the most popular cartoon series on the planet, The Simpsons, has been fined and banned on Turkish TV because they can't take a joke (Not for the first time BTW). It seems that in one particular show the Simpsons too...
Read full story12/12/12 Sandy Relief Concert 'freaking out CIA numerologists'
New York - A famous Manhattan concert venue featured as a post-apocalyptic 'Obamascare' assisted suicide facility in the 1973 movie Soylent Green is at the core of a major paranormal scare this weekend. FEMA officials reviewing post-Superstorm San...
Read full storyAn Amazing Dancing Fly Discovered In Mississippi
BILOXI, Mississippi - Everyone has heard of a Flea Circus, but the folks down in Biloxi, Mississippi, are all excited about a fly that was discovered on Cletis "Hooch" Collywobbles' hog farm. According to local veterinarian Dr. Herbert "Boo Boo" N...
Read full storyMan sues himself for being ugly
Milan, Italy-an Italian man, Terrano Boorge wants to sue himself for being so ugly. On January 11, he plans to take himself to court by force and hire a lawyer. He stated that everyday he falls sick when he looks into the mirror and sometimes fai...
Read full storyRush Limbaugh Says The Ann Coulter Affair Rumor Is Not True
NEW YORK CITY - Rush Limbaugh says that he does not appreciate hearing the rumor that he and GOP maven Ann Coulter are involved in a romantic affair. The radio political commentator told GOPicky Magazine that there is no way in hell he would ever...
Read full storyMan on laptop recycles his recycle bin
A 34 Irish man is in hospital tonight after he accidentally recycled his recycle bin. The man, who wishes to remain anonymous, was on his laptop at home when he made the fateful error. A hospital spokesman said the laptop went into an infinite...
Read full storyRihanna and Chris Brown To Tie The Knot
MANHATTAN - In a move that has to go down as one of the most unbelievable of the year, Rihanna has just announced that she and her ex-boyfriend Chris Brown will be getting married on January 1, 2013. Brown who used the Barbadian beauty as a punchi...
Read full storyThe Ed Miller Band to sue Labour Party for financial loss
16 piece brass band, 'The Ed Miller Band' has commenced court proceedings against the Labour Party to recoup financial losses which they attribute to an association with Labour leader and Wallace and Grommit stunt double Ed Miliband. Band founder...
Read full storyDrunk Santa explodes at VFW Hall in Iowa
COWPATH, Iowa (ABSNN) - An "apparently" booze filled, 87-year-old WWII veteran playing Santa, exploded Sunday afternoon, killing himself, and injuring 27 men and women who were waiting in line to have their pictures taken in his lap. According to on...
Read full storyTheo Walcott to buy new house 'in the centre of the street'
As the transfer window reopens on January 1st and the future of Theo Walcott at Arsenal still undecided, the saga took a development today when Theo put his house in Hertfordshire up for sale. Speculation mounted that Walcott was going to live in...
Read full storyGay rights activists demand gay boycott of Christmas until a gay Father Christmas is accepted!
Just before the festive period begins gay activists are calling for a Christmas boycott because they feel as though the world is discrminating against them by not allowing a gay Father Christmas to deliver the presents. US Gay activist, Scarlet Pi...
Read full storyNASCAR To Merge With Professional Wrestling
CHARLOTTE, North Carolina - High ranking officials with NASCAR recently got together with some high ranking professional wrestling officials at a Captain Cluckity Cluck Clucks Chicken Shack in Charlotte. They discussed the possibility of the two f...
Read full storyCroatia Cancels Plans To Invade Japan
ZAGREB, Croatia - The government of Croatia has just released a military news bulletin. The bulletin states that their planned invasion of Japan has been cancelled indefinitely. A spokesperson for the Croatian government identified as Kovlovin...
Read full storyBogus war hero sentenced to 30 days
A man who embellished his military record to appear as a highly-decorated war hero has been sentenced to 30 days in federal prison, authorities said. Paul Haslam, 45, of San Diego, was convicted of altering a military or naval discharge certificat...
Read full storyHoney Boo Boo and Bob Dylan Record A Christmas Song
LOS ANGELES - A representative for Bob Dylan has just announced that the 71-year-old folk singer has just recorded a Christmas song with the star of Here Comes Honey Boo Boo, Alana Thompson, 7. Dylan's rep told Music Moments Magazine that he was f...
Read full storyFiscal Cliff turned into mountain of prosperity by Senate
Washington, D.C. - Senate leaders leaked to this reporter, today, that a solution to the Baby Boomer Fiscal Cliff problem has been agreed to. The basic idea is very simple. Not enough young to take care of the old. It is the creative solution that...
Read full storyKaty Perry Says The Highly Erotic Photos of Her Were Meant For John Mayer Only
RENO, Nevada - Katy Perry was visiting an old friend in Reno when she was asked about the recent erotic photos that have been posted on the Internet. Perry looked at the snapshots and was taken aback. She said that her boyfriend, John "The Player"...
Read full storyDubya's Paraguay gas field bombs
Chaco, Paraguay - Ownership deeds to almost 100,000 gas-rich acres purchased by George W Bush as part of a retirement nest egg have been scrambled by Paraguay Justice Ministry officials after a lengthy land grab fraud probe. The former US Presiden...
Read full storyLady Gaga Responds To The Fat Comments
DETROIT - Lady Gaga was sitting backstage in her dressing room after just having performed at The Carburetor Coliseum. She was asked about the fact that the venue had not been sold out and if that concerned her. The New York native put down her...
Read full storyKobe Bryant Throws His Laker Teammates Under The Bus
LOS ANGELES - Well once again the prima donna personality of Kobe Bean Bryant has shown through as brightly as the sun's rays on a high noon July day in the middle of the Mojave Desert. Bryant's Lakers, as they are referred to by Jack Nicholson, A...
Read full story'Frankenchrist' band the Dead Kennedys to record Kate baby tribute song
California - San Francisco hardcore punk rockers the Dead Kennedys have been commissioned by a British label to record a Christmas special. 'All Hail Our Fetus Overlord' is to be released as a single with the B-side featuring the band's October 20...
Read full storyThe Ellen DeGeneres - Portia de Rossi Marriage Has Hit Shaky Ground
BEVERLY HILLS - Word coming out of Tinsel Town is that there appears to be some unhappy rumblings in the Ellen and Portia DeGeneres marital household. A source close to the talk show host stated that a neighbor recently reported hearing some rathe...
Read full storyBill Gates' Awesome Christmas Gift For His Wife
SHEBOYGAN, Wisconsin - A few weeks ago Bill Gates, 57, visited the town of Sheboygan which is situated on Lake Michigan. Gates traveled to the Wisconsin city to see about purchasing the famous lake which is one of the five famous Great Lakes. T...
Read full storyPiers Morgan's new "America's Got Guns" T.V. series leaked
Hollywood, California - The script for the first show of a new T.V. series to be hosted by hoity-toity Piers Morgan has been leaked to the Press. The new show is to be called America's Got Guns and features exciting audience interaction. The scri...
Read full storyPoll Reveals most Annoying Thing About Christmas Is Those Family Christmas Cards, You Know The Ones, Irritating As Crap "From Our Family To Yours'
A recent poll conducted by this writer has revealed that one of the most annoying, cringe worthy and irritating things about Christmas are those shit family Christmas cards you get from relatives and friends, depicting them and their kids dressed up...
Read full storySpike Lee protests 110 occurrences of N-word in film while most whites believe it's no big whoop
HARFOLD, Vt. - Film producer Spike Lee has decided to boycott Quentin Tarantino's new film Django Unchained because the film uses the N-word 110 times. Students at Harfold State College, 99.9% of them white as snow, feel that 110 occurrences in a...
Read full storyNorth Korea Fires A Missile and Hits One Of Her Shopping Malls
TONG CHANG-RI, North Korea - The regime of Kim Jong Un defiantly fired off one of their missiles and the one stage rocket malfunctioned landing in The Yum Yum Shopping Mall in the capital city of Pyongyang. A spokesperson for the North Korean gove...
Read full storyManny Pacquiao To Retire and Appear On Dancing With The Stars
NEW YORK CITY - Word out of the Big Apple is that champion boxer Manny Pacquiao of the Philippines has decided to hang up his boxing gloves after getting beaten by Mexico's Juan Manuel Marquez. The fight which shocked all of the fans at the MGM Gr...
Read full storyOrdinary People: Boston Celtics Need Pachelbel's Canon in D
The Boston Celtics are becoming a version of the old family tale, Ordinary People. You may not have cued the music for Pachelbel's Canon in D, but the Celtics seem to need a conductor for 'D' this season. In Robert Redford's old movie, the film...
Read full storyBritish bank in US owned by Columbia drug cartels and Mafia!
The US senate have accused a British bank, better known as "Home Suiting Biggest Criminals", of allowing billions of drug money and huge sums from banned nations such as Iran and North korea to slip through their fingers. The washing machines at the...
Read full storyBruce Jenner Talking The Big "D"
HOLLYWOOD - Stating that he has put up with way more BS than what 99.7 percent of American males would, Bruce Jenner has reportedly contacted famed L.A. attorney Ginger Allred about getting a divorce from Queen Kris of The House of Kardashian. The...
Read full storyAnti Porn group make their own Movies
A group in California have started to make what they are calling Anti Porn movies featuring scenarios that are common to adult movies but that end up in wholesome activities. The films are being distributed via a website and at the moment there...
Read full storyPope Tweets About Extended Vacation Beginning 20 December 2012 Fueling Rumors That He "Knows Something"
Anxious twitter users who follow the Pope were today frantically re-tweeting his latest tweet in which the Pontiff declared "Won't be around much next week, heading for a nice getaway next Thursday, touch wood will be back tweeting Saturday....."...
Read full storyPermanently Sexually Aroused Man Advised To Visit Georgia
A man recently profiled in the media about his rare sexual disorder - a condition that caused him to be continuously sexually aroused - has been advised by experts to spend a few days in the US State of Georgia. Graham Cooper, 39, has struggled wi...
Read full storyMan Reflects on Sad Loss Of Mother
As New Years Eve approaches and we fondly wave farewell to 2012 and welcome, with open arms and a sigh of trepidation, 2013, many people will be reflecting on the loved ones they lost in the last 12 months. "It is a time for reflection" said grief...
Read full storyHugh Hefner, 86, Says He Thinks He's Getting Married
HOLMBY HILLS, California - The Playboy Mansion will soon have a happily married woman residing as its "First Lady." Hugh Hefner, the 86-year-old Playboy Empire mogul has just announced that the wedding between him and Playboy bunny, Crystal Harris...
Read full storySir Cliff Richard Extremely Anxious After Misreading Headlines
The Dorian Grey of pop, Sir Cliff Richard, was being comforted by friends today after he mistakenly misread news headlines emanating from the United States. The bronzed singer was said to have been shaken. The drama unfolded at around noon local...
Read full storySanta Claus in Purgatory
Jolly Old Saint Nick they call him. Belly shakes like a bowl full of jelly. He gives presents to children all over the world, but did you ever wonder how he got to be Santa Claus? Groundbreaking evidence, in the form of ancient parchments, has ju...
Read full storySanta's Workshop To Be Shut Down!
The United Nations has taken steps to shut down Santa's workshop. A top-secret investigation has revealed that Santa Claus does not employ elves to make toys. In fact, the labor is provided by children. United Nations spokesman Felix Navidad st...
Read full storyThe Real Reason The Dallas Mavericks Waived Derek Fisher
DALLAS - Derek Fisher, who has five NBA Championship rings, has been waived by the Dallas Mavericks. The 38-year-old veteran was apparently told by team owner Mark "Money Boy" Cuban that a deal was in the works where he was going to be traded to t...
Read full storyStarbucks Lovers and Haters Revel in Message of Come Together
Starbucks new Come Together message of innocuousness has led to all out war between bitter rivals that seek to place themselves in opposition to anything anyone else appears to possibly represent. Come Together had been interpreted by one 7/11 coffe...
Read full storyX-Factor Shocker: Emblem 3 Is Eliminated
HOLLYWOOD - Simon Cowell, the music mogul with the golden touch really and truly believed that his boy group Emblem 3, was going to be the 2012 X-Factor winner. But he received the shock of his life when they were eliminated on the semi-finals res...
Read full storyLamar Odom Says He May Seek A Divorce From Khloe Kardashian
BEVERLY HILLS - Lamar Odom the former Los Angeles Laker player, who now plays for the Los Angeles Clippers, has just said that he is sick and tired of playing second fiddle to his wife Khloe Kardashian's X-Factor gig. The 6-foot-10-inch Odom was h...
Read full storyMonkey spotted shopping in Ikea
A small monkey wearing a sheepskin coat was spotted shopping in a branch of Ikea in Toronto. Shoppers were surprised and shocked by the sight. "It was just a small monkey. I thought at first it was a little person in a mask." Mario Tomlin said. '...
Read full storyArizona Governor Jan Brewer's Amazing Comment About The Santa Ana Winds
PHOENIX - Many people believe that Arizona governor Jan Brewer has finally gone off the deep end. The woman who has banned tacos, tortillas, and tamales in her state recently appeared on The View and made an astounding comment. She stated to Jo...
Read full storyJennifer Lopez Says She Misses Being On American Idol
CHICAGO - Jennifer Lopez was in town visiting one of Chicago's most famous residents Oprah Winfrey. Lopez, says that things with her boy-toy Casper Smart, who is 18 years younger than her, are going along great even though he cannot name the four...
Read full storyKat Von D Gets Seven Jesse James Tattoos Removed
SAN FRANCISCO - Kat Von D, who is one of the most tattooed women in America, has just had seven of the ink markings removed. Von D, who dumped her fiancé "Messy" Jesse James after she found out he had been unfaithful with 20 different women, said...
Read full storyAmerican Media Already Prepare Profile Of Next Mass Shooter
US news media outlets are already preparing draft descriptions of future mass murderers based on previous descriptions of all former mass killers. "I can't believe it, they were such a normal family" has already been earmarked as one potential lea...
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