Is Donald Trump Using Performance Enhancing Drugs?
Donald Trump is in trouble, and he needs a distraction. First stop, a projection. Change the subject. Look over there. He was supposed to make it big time with Bob Woodward, through his confessions about coronavirus. Woodward is the Washington P…
Read full storyCan Lego solve all of your problems?
Can Lego solve all of your problems? Of course, it can't, but neither will a shelf full of self-help books, or talking to your neighbours, winning the lottery, or speaking to Geoff from five doors down about the best way to insulate your loft, but…
Read full storyMan talking about the weather, again
A man in Chutney on the Fritz has been discussing the weather again, but only with the same five people. Local gadabout Wayne Smith, a 47-year-old former schoolboy who still owns his own teeth and hair, said 'Brrr, it is a bit nippy, isn't it?' to…
Read full storyHusband told that now Keeping up with the Kardashians is ending, he has to watch the box-set
Gary Johnson is not looking forward to what happens in 2021, as his wife, Lorraine, remembers a promise he sarcastically made in 2016. 'Yes, it is my own fault,' moaned Gary. 'I said to Lorraine that I would only watch Keeping up with The Kardashi…
Read full story16 People Credited on Three-Minute Song
New song 'Love you, love me', a three-minute epic of banal lyrics, a slow, monotonous beat, and music that is about as ear-catching as lift music, has sixteen people credited in its creation. 'This isn't like one of those religious songs, where yo…
Read full storyCouple really now sick of his three jazz fusion albums
Couple Tracy Brassingthwaite and Martin Woods have been in lockdown since March, and are now both completely sick of the three jazz fusion albums he plays. 'At first, I thought it would be fine,' said Martin, 'but I have really been missing music…
Read full storyDallas Cowboys Head Coach Reveals Secret New Plays
The NFL season is up and running at last, and one team that is hoping for big things this year, are the Dallas Cowboys, who have high hopes of making it to Super Bowl LV in Tampa in February. And the Cowboys haven't been wasting their time in lock…
Read full storyWeather Couldn't Make Its Mind Up
There was utter confusion and a good deal of frustration earlier today, when the weather in one part of the world just couldn't make its mind up what it was going to do with itself, and kept changing from one extreme to the other. Having risen ear…
Read full storyNew Political Support Group
It shouldn't be surprising that certain groups of people are supporters of Trump in the upcoming presidential election. One such group would be the owners and operators of coal mines. Another might be right-wing militia organizations. While the ab…
Read full storyKaitlyn Jenner in world first procedure
Once the head of the Kardashian family, the former Bruce Jenner, Kaitlyn Jenner, expressed her boredom with life as a woman. So, in order to shake her life into something more substantial, Kaitlyn has announced she will transition to a four-legged an…
Read full storyPresident Trump Plans to Give One of His Campaign Offices a Stimulus Check to Keep it From Having to Close
KLANVILLE, Alabama – (Satire News) - Reuters is reporting that President Trump has just learned that the GOP campaign office in Klanville may have to close. The office manager, Titus "Cornbread" Bofeedus, texted the president and told him he neede…
Read full storyThe Ku Klux Klan Says That, Thanks to President Trump, Membership is Up by 93%
COTTON BALLS, Georgia – (Satire News) – Ku Klux Klan Illustrated magazine is reporting that their membership has gone up by 93% just in the past six months. KKK spokesperson Roy Dell “Bubba” Griddle told KKKI that, thanks to all of the hate-spewin…
Read full storyJeff Bezos is Hinting That He May Buy The New York Yankees
NEW YORK CITY – (Sports Satire) – The baseball world has been rocked at the revelation that the world’s richest man, Jeff Bezos, is contemplating purchasing the New York Yankees. The King of Amazon told Sporting Chance magazine that, ever since he…
Read full storyThe Los Angeles Dodgers Are Kicking Butt
LOS ANGELES – (Sports Satire) – CBS Sports has informed the baseball public that the Dodgers are the number one team in all of baseball. The West Coast hardballers currently have an amazing win-loss record of 32-13. The Dodgers have some of the…
Read full storyNASCAR Suspends Another Driver
DAYTONA BEACH, Florida – (Sports Satire) - Officials at NASCAR have suspended another race car driver after several policy violations. Racer Mike Wallace, no relation to black NASCAR driver Bubba Wallace, was notified that he has been suspended du…
Read full storyTrump Virus Infects Entire White House
Washington, DC - Everybody at the White House has it. The entire Republican Party, too. Currently, so does forty-three percent of the United States. It is the disease known as the "Trump Virus". President Trump won't speak of it. He deflects, call…
Read full storyOregon wildfire smoke making it difficult for everyone to see his sick gains, complains Hexxus
(Oregon)-Hexxus, toxic apparition and avatar of the forces of Destruction, was last seen on a fiery ridge in the Oregon Cascades complaining about how no one was able to see his sick gains because of poor visibility. “You know it takes a lot of ef…
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