Do you know everyone in 'I am a celebrity get me out of here'?
Do you know everyone in 'I am a celebrity get me out of here'? The chances are, that no, you don't, and you never will. They will be a list of former soap opera actors, a couple of Instagram Influencers, a faded politician and a comedian from the…
Read full storyGhosts can't really be bothered this year
Ghosts Sheila and Thomas Wotsit, from the seventeenth century, have both said they aren't really bothered with it all this year. Thomas said: 'Lookee here, sir, this is a bit of a rum do, and no mistake. Time was, with a well blown-out candle, a b…
Read full storyUnnattractive man not wearing a mask, really should be
Barry Humpledink, yet another fictional forty-something called Barry from a fictional town, is not wearing a mask. Mr Humpledink, famously single and distinctly old-fashioned in his views about people, is not wearing a mask, even though he has bee…
Read full storyMelania Trump Says That If Donald Gives Her Any Shit About Their Divorce She Will Sing Like a Canary Regarding Fort Knox
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – A White House insider says that Melania confided in her about an incident that could easily land the President and others in prison for a long, long time. Tittle Tattle Tonight reports that it is no secret that M…
Read full storyPrince Louis Seen Without Face Mask
Prince Louis, the youngest son of Prince William, the Duke of Cambridge, and his wife, Catherine, the Duchess of Cambridge, has come in for some rather severe criticism tonight, after he was seen in public not wearing any kind of face protection.
Read full storySociopath sending P45s as Secret Santa
Sociopath and contributor of money to good causes Ebenezer Goodfellow has revealed in 'I am not a nice person' magazine that, this year, he will be sending his eight loyal staff members their P45s as part of his secret Santa. 'Yes,' said the ironi…
Read full storySkeleton glad to be staying indoors
Skeleton Gary Jones is glad that, this year, he can stay in. 'No-one seems to be doing anything for Halloween this year, so I don't think I will,' said the strangely cheerful, bloodless, skinless and internal organ-less married father-of-three.
Read full storyPhotocopiers breathing a sigh of relief
Photocopiers across the country are breathing a sigh of relief, as all office Christmas parties have been banned, due to Covid 19. Gestetner 39ZX Donna said: 'Yes, thank God that Kevin and Amanda won't be photocopying their backsides this year. Am…
Read full storySpider's Web survives third week in the corner
Spider's web Gavin Williamson is smug, having survived his third week in the corner of your bedroom. The long piece of webbing, that began his life in the rear end of a spider, has smugly been hanging around in the corner because, as always, you d…
Read full storyNew day-in-the-life-of-a-sheep analytical study emerges with fast delivery from Amazon
Breaking: For the first time in Earth's history, a new type of author has been found, proudly announced through Amazon dot com and Mr. Bezos. That is, a sheep as scribe—yes, from the animal of the species ovis balantes dispersus—has emerged with a…
Read full storyTrump Using Fake/Misleading Video About Biden
Donald Trump is using a faked, misleading video to ridicule opponent Joe Biden. Trump hasn't looked in the mirror lately. Fake and misleading is the tan makeup and Elvis red hair comb-over. Wearing the overcoat on a hot day is trying to fake and misl…
Read full storyA Hacker Hacks Into President Trump’s Campaign Website And Reveals Very Revealing Secrets
LAS VEGAS – (Satire News) – Political Salad Bar Magazine has stated that a computer hacker has hacked into President Trump’s campaign website. A private computing anti-hacking company told PSBM that the hacker is extremely professional, and was ab…
Read full storyDallas Cowboys Owner Jerry Jones is Considering Signing Tim Tebow To Be His Starting Quarterback
DALLAS – (Satire Sports) – Jerry Jones is in a world of hurt, as they say out yonder in the Lone Star state. The Cowboys owner is down to having to use his third-string quarterback, Ben DiNucci, after Dak Prescott and Andy Dalton have both been i…
Read full storyThe President Secretly Tells Son Barron That He May Launch a Missile Towards China Just To Stir Things Up
WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – One of the Secret Service agents assigned to protect 14-year-old Barron Trump has said that he is very concerned with the President’s mental state. The unnamed agent commented that Trump is doing some really stra…
Read full storyTwo Million U.S. Presidential Election Ballots Are Discovered in a Dumpster in Mexico
WASHINGTON, D.C. - (Satire News) – Ipso Facto Illustrated Magazine is reporting that 2 million U.S. voting ballots were confiscated in Mexico by a task force comprising members with the FBI, CIA, IRS, and IUD. The ballots were transported on an Ae…
Read full storyTrump Invokes Sedition Act to Silence The Spoof
The White House, Washington, D. C. Woof Blister reporting for The Spoof. This reporter was charged today with violation of the Sedition Act, a law passed in the administration of John Adams over 200 years ago. I was arrested and booked, then bailed o…
Read full storyIvanka Trump Birthday Latest
Happy Birthday to you! Happy Birthday to you! Hapy Birthday! Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday to you! There were scenes of joy at the White House today, as President Trump's favorite daughter, Ivanka, celebrated her birthday in style, with a huge…
Read full storyTrump v. Biden Big Fight Preview
As the Big Fight countdown counts down and the 'Scrap of the Old Guys' on 3 November gets ever nearer, a sober analysis of the two contenders shows that Democrat Joe Biden might be found wanting in his bid to gain the edge over President Trump in thi…
Read full storyIntercept managers throw tantrum on Glenn Greenwald's report of Biden cluster-f*ck situation
The Intercept has clarified its editorial policies, following Glenn Greenwald's sudden departure from that organization. In essence, Mr. Greenwald "used to be" top-notch, but has fallen to new lows of self-serving and otherwise scratching his ass.
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