Melania Trump Says That If Donald Gives Her Any Shit About Their Divorce She Will Sing Like a Canary Regarding Fort Knox

Funny story written by Fannin Fabriano

Friday, 30 October 2020

image for Melania Trump Says That If Donald Gives Her Any Shit About Their Divorce She Will Sing Like a Canary Regarding Fort Knox
This is a photo of some of the 113 gold bars sitting in a storage unit in Baltimore.

WASHINGTON, D.C. – (Satire News) – A White House insider says that Melania confided in her about an incident that could easily land the President and others in prison for a long, long time.

Tittle Tattle Tonight reports that it is no secret that Melania will be filing for a divorce once her husband gets his ass kicked by Joe Biden.

And the first lady may have one hell of a horrible accent, but she’s certainly no dummy; she's not Paris Hilton by any stretch of the imagination.

TTT is alleging that Melania has a videotape of the President and Donald Jr., Ivanka, Eric, Kimberly Guilfoyle, and Sean Hannity removing gold bars out of the Fort Knox Gold Depository in Kentucky.

Mrs. Trump said that the Trumps and their cohorts took a total of 113 of the 27.5 pound gold bars.

A gold expert hired by TTT stated that each bar weighs the equivalent of 400 ounces, and at $42.22 per ounce, this is the equivalent of $16,888 per bar. For 113 bars, thiscomes out to a little over $1.9 million.

Melania was asked where the 113 gold bars are located.

She checked her cell phone, and replied that the gold is sitting in the Johnny Unitas Storage Unit Facility, storage unit 17-F, in downtown Baltimore.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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