Senior Tory adviser was a lying hypocrite
In news that surprised nobody at all, leading adviser to the PM, Dominic Cummings, has been unmasked as a liar, a hypocrite and an arrogant self-serving twat who refuses to acknowledge any errors he has made. "When I drove 260 miles during the loc...
Read full storyMotorized BarcaLoungers Replace Scooters In Beaver Crossing
BILLINGSGATE POST: A mad genius? Perhaps. Elmer Smuckmeister, a retired farmer and bon vivant, who made and lost fortunes by thinking outside the envelope, was the first to purchase a scooter franchise in the early days of this revolutionary transp...
Read full storyMan Tried To Block Out Wedding Music By Playing The Fall At Full Volume
A man who became incensed after he was forced, yet again, to endure the torture of another Cambodian wedding ceremony close to his home, eventually snapped, and resorted to unconventional measures to block out the loud music coming from the venue.
Read full storyPresidential Historians Agree That Trump Will Forever Be Known As The Electoral College President
CHICAGO – A group of leading presidential historians recently met in the Windy City to discuss #45’s legacy. And, to the man (and woman), they all agreed that it will definitely be nothing to be proud of. For one thing, he will have an asterisk...
Read full storyPresident Trump May Have to Sell Trump Tower Due to His Personal Financial Mess
WASHINGTON, D.C. – President Trump is still furious with his press secretary, Kayleigh McEnany, for exposing his bank account number and routing number to the entire civilized world. Meanwhile, Trump’s personal attorney, Segundo Juarez, informed t...
Read full storyExtremely Pissed-Off Women From Numerous Dating Sites Finally Find Where Man Too Cheap To Use Credit Card Actually Lives Before Pulling Him Out Of His House And Beating The Shit Out Of Him
Roger Crobb, 39, of Grand Rapids, Michigan, was pulled out of his house last Thursday, and nearly pummeled to death by 23 women who successfully combined their resources and their intellects in order to find out where the cheap, sleazy, non-committal…
Read full storyPiers Morgan and Howard Stern Both Agree That Trump Has Finally Gone Bat Shit Crazy
NEW YORK CITY – Howard Stern and Piers Morgan recently met and talked about putting on a benefit to raise money for food stamp recipients. The two also talked about the New York Giants, Manchester United, and the gorgeously sultry Sofia Vergara.
Read full storyTrump Plays Golf and Shoots a 98, But Instructs His Caddy to Write Down 81
STERLING, Virginia – Somehow, President Donald Trump found time to play a round of golf yesterday, instead of trying to deal with the biggest pandemic disaster in the history of the world. And how convenient that the golf course he picked to play...
Read full storyCOVID-19: Man Insisting That He Will 'Die Looking Good'
A man who will almost certainly 'bite the dust' when the Coronavirus eventually gets around to visiting him, has said that, rather than fight a useless battle, he will go willingly, but will go 'looking good'. Moys Kenwood, 56, is in the wrong age...
Read full storySocialist Presidential Candidate Admits Stock Market Addiction
Norman Eugene Davidson, ten times candidate for president of the United States on the Socialist Party ticket, admitted today, in an editorial in the Socialist Call, that he has been a closeted stock market enthusiast all his adult life. The Call was…
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