Office workers to face corporal punishment when they misbehave
- IFL Group, an Internet marketing agency in Aberdeen brought in the system - Punishment is used on 'a minority' of workers with low productivity or who misbehave - Bosses smacking their employees will 'encourage other workers to work harder'...
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Scotland Has Just Purchased a Destroyer From Japan
EDINBURGH, Scotland - (Satire News) - Scotland's Prime Minister Nicola Sturgeon has just informed the Scottish people that Scotland has just purchased a destroyer from Japan. The first minister stated that the reason for the purchase is so that S…
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Scottish Authorities Apprehend Two Men Who Were Caught With Counterfeit Kilts In Their Possession
GLASGOW, Scotland - (World Satire) - The BBC reports that two men, whom they say are from the tiny village of Blimey Bay , Scotland, were taken into custody when local police found 191 counterfeit kilts in the trunk of their Cadillac Escalade SUV.
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A British Woman Wants To Be Transferred To A Men's Prison
London — A woman Erin Hebblewhite, 30 who petioned the United Nations to be transferred to a men's prison won her case against the disgraceful British Parliament who striped the British crown of it's rightful inheritance of power, causing Britain ce…
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Glory Holes to be built into new Scottish homes Outrage
New Scottish houses may have built in "Glory Holes", under plans to improve the home like qualities of new build designs. A proposed new development of 3000 homes along the banks of Loch Ness will each have a glory hole, with larger properties having...
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The Government of Scotland Tells Trump To Never Again Set Foot In Their Nice, Lovely, Anti-Racist Country
EDINBURGH, Scotland - (Satire News) - The beautifully delightful country of Scotland, which has been described as peaceful, romantic, beautifully green, celtic, and poetic has made it known that the lying likes of one Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump ar…
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Naked Driver Sought By Police
Trump Feeling The Heat For Being An Anti-American Instigator May Be Getting Ready To Flee To Scotland
Man Kicked Out Of Cop26 Climate Talks For Not Recycling Pepsi Can
Mandatory face masks in shops causes concern - ‘What’s the problem?’ said Robbie the Robber
England Prepares For Scottish Independence
Weather Forecaster Breaks Endurance Record on Television in Norway
The New York City Council Has Voted Unanimously To Have Donald J. Trump Arrested If He Sets Foot In New York City
Scottish Police to Merge
Where’s Your Union, Jack?
Translation software breaks down - no-one can understand Scots any more
Free Church Votes for Change
England to keep Scotland a Prisoner Forever - So No Democracy for Scotland
Experts Now Agree That The Loch Ness Monster Is Actually A Tremendously Overweight Salamander With A Glandular Problem
JOLLY ROGER, England – (Satire News) – The infamous Loch Ness Monster of Scottish Gaelic folklore was first discovered on September 13, 1933, at 4:35 am in Loch Ness in the Scottish Highlands. Unlike La Chupacabra creature in Texas, Nessie is not…
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Donald Trump The Riot Instigator Has Been Arrested Trying To Flee The Country
NEW YORK CITY - (Satire News) - The New York Police Dept. reports that Donald Jonathan Erasmus Trump has just been taken into custody at JFK Airport. Federal agents report apprehending the orange whore bitch as he was in line to get on board a fli…
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Hadrian's Wall To Be Made Higher, Stronger To Keep Scots Out
Hadrian's Wall, the structure built by the Romans to keep Scottish people from encroaching into England, is to be fortified at a cost of £28billion of taxpayers' money - money, says the government, that would be "well spent". The Wall, built in AD…
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Haggis ignore social-distancing
Coppers have arrested a gaggle of raucous haggis who decided to turn deaf ear to new social-distancing regulations by having a tear-up on Glen Tilt. Authorities arrived at scenes of utter degradation just after one o’clock this morning, after bein...
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Scottish Jihadist May Be Lurking in Pub Washrooms
Reports are flying fast and furious, with no confirmation as to whether they’re true, but is there a radical Muslim cabal of jihadists in … Scotland?! Wha? It’s all speculation so far, but things have been heard, the grapevine is a-buzz, that cer…
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Pope's itinerary to the UK marred by bad grammar
Pope Benedict XVI's visit to the UK has resulted in Scotland being beatified due to a grammatical error. The original itinerary stated that: "..the Pope would take in Birmingham as part of the planned beatification of Cardinal John Newman and Scot...
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Britain declared most Undemocratic Democracy ever
Britain or The UK, or sometimes just called England, has been declared as the most undemocratic place on planet earth and that's what is being said by an Englishman. Robert Smith from Manchester who leads the campaign to get true Democracy said to...
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Scotland 3011 A.D
What would an archaeologist in a thousand years time find if he excavated in the Glasgow area ? "One of the most interesting discoveries during my lifelong project of excavating sporting venues in the Western European Continental Peninsula occurred when I had to journey into the northwest of the landmass where a large metropolitan colony once existed. While there were more than a few sit...
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Scottish Police Call for More Women Shooters
Scottish police have called for more female officers to carry guns. At the moment it is mainly the men who are called upon to whip their weapons out and shoot at passers by. Under new Sex Equality Laws men will be able to be shot dead by either ma...
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Glasgow Council anger at Scotland's Commonwealth Games snub
Glasgow Lord Provost Robert Winter last night expressed surprise and disappointment at the news that Scotland's team managers for the Delhi Commonwealth Games would not subject their athletes to squalid, dirty and sub-standard conditions in the Athle...
Read full storyFunny Scotland Headlines
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Ping Pong Legend Pong Ping Poo Dies Aged 97
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Hadrian's Wall To Be Made Higher, Stronger To Keep Scots Out
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Britain declared most Undemocratic Democracy ever
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Scotland Wants Own Olympic Team
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Glory Holes to be built into new Scottish homes Outrage
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Office workers to face corporal punishment when they misbehave
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Experts Now Agree That The Loch Ness Monster Is Actually A Tremendously Overweight Salamander With A Glandular Problem
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Scotland Has Just Purchased a Destroyer From Japan
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Nothing but the lake – Loch Ness
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Scottish Authorities Apprehend Two Men Who Were Caught With Counterfeit Kilts In Their Possession
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Pope's itinerary to the UK marred by bad grammar
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Glasgow Council anger at Scotland's Commonwealth Games snub
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Scottish Police Call for More Women Shooters
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Scotland 3011 A.D
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Haggis ignore social-distancing
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Woman With 93 Cats Gets Rid of 2
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The Government of Scotland Tells Trump To Never Again Set Foot In Their Nice, Lovely, Anti-Racist Country
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Donald Trump The Riot Instigator Has Been Arrested Trying To Flee The Country
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Scottish Jihadist May Be Lurking in Pub Washrooms
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A British Woman Wants To Be Transferred To A Men's Prison
