Trump Reported To Throw Temper Tantrum On Inauguration Eve
President Donald Trump was reported by multiple staffers as having what can only be described as a "post watching The Notebook level of crying." After being told he could not pardon himself, the United States president threw himself on the floor.
Read full storyBiden's Butler Shiv Aalok Discovers Note Trump Left for Biden in Oval Office
Shiv Aalok, yes the former uber driver who found Trump's tax return in the back of his car and also solved the mystery behind "Q", has been hired by President Biden to be his chief butler. Aalok reports he was detoxifying the Oval Office with cloro…
Read full storyMan telling everyone he is reading James Joyce
Writing on his blog, My View of the World, 79-year old Raymond Ving from Chutney on the Fritz has stated that he has been reading Ulysses by James Joyce, whilst listening to Jazz, and doing the Times Crossword. Like most of us, he has been drinkin…
Read full story85% of Americans can't name who the President was yesterday
It is 2 hours after Joe Biden's inauguration as US President and a shocking survey has shown that the vast majority - over 80% - of Americans can't remember who was President this morning. Methew Jefferson, 45, is an unemployed fast food restaura…
Read full storyAre you a Wogger?
Are you a wogger? Do you go out for a jog, but only move quickly when you see someone else? Do you jog for about 10% of your time, and walk for the rest? Do you pass a lot of people who do the same? Did you take up jogging on January 1st, but a…
Read full storyNew public confidence in government rating due soon following latest interview with Gates and Fauci
Major news sources are now swarming to Mr. Gates and Mr. Fauci to get their views on recent developments with the current “warp-speed” covid vaccines. Not all these developments have been favorable, as Moderna, for example, has been forced to susp…
Read full storyAmerica to realise that Donald Trump will always be the ex who sends text messages
Human wotsit and former American president Donald Trump will be the ex that texts you every year, wanting another chance, America will realise over the next few years. 'Yes, I treated America really badly,' said Trump, 'but I feel that we never re…
Read full storyHillary and Pelosi claim Putin behind attack on capitol plus laptop and boot on desk
Yesterday, on Ms. Clinton's podcast, “You and Me Both,” Hillary and Nancy Pelosi fastidiously sought to avoid being called “daft” for their views. Was it not clear, they suggested, that once again Mr. Putin had interfered in American politics? Who…
Read full storyDonald Trump Has Cooked Goose
Donald Trump has cooked his goose. And thats a fact! Mr Trump was the president of the United States of America but not anymore. Mr Joe Biden has removed Mr Trump from a White House and now Mr Trump must live in his own house. Mr Trump is not a…
Read full storyChinese OAP, Wan Pong Poo, breaks Guinness Book of Records record sitting on the bog!
(NOT EDITED) In the remote Chinese province, Xinjiang, suddenly global interest in one inhabitant has gone viral after reports he was determined to bring fame to his desolate mountain village! Wan Pong Poo, 85-year-old senior citizen, locked hims…
Read full storyAn Elderly Couple Names The Top 10 Things To Do and Not To Do While Sheltering-In-Place
Caleb and Stephanie Finkfeister, of Pelican Balls, Louisiana, recently celebrated their 50th wedding anniversary. Caleb retired 9 years ago from working as a pet guide at the Pelican Balls Petting Zoo. Stephanie is still working for herself, making w…
Read full storyCitizen Donald Trump Is Selling All of His McDonalds Restaurants
MAR-A-LAGO, Florida - (Satire News) – The ex-resident of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue in Washington, D.C., spoke with GOPicky Magazine. He was asked how he felt now, being a plain, simple, ordinary citizen. The former president made a face, and rep…
Read full storyTrump issues a pardon for Kardashian family
In breaking news, United States president, Donald J Trump, has issued a pardon for the entire Kardashian family and the woeful TV program that annoyed Americans for more than ten years. Trump said he could empathise with the general public about t…
Read full storyTrump Blames Obama For Capitol Riot
There was a new development in the investigation into the riot at the Capitol building on January yesterday, when President Donald Trump claimed that former President Barack Obama was behind the incident. He accused Obama of "insurrecting the US…
Read full storyTeacher Taught Lesson Wearing Only His Underpants
A teacher who was unavoidably late for his lesson was ultimately forced to 'cut some corners' this morning whilst getting dressed, and ended up by having to teach his students whilst wearing only his underpants. The teacher cannot be named for 'le…
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