Shiv Aalok, yes the former uber driver who found Trump's tax return in the back of his car and also solved the mystery behind "Q", has been hired by President Biden to be his chief butler. Aalok reports he was detoxifying the Oval Office with clorox and sage when he discovered a note on the the President's desk. According to Aalok, the note read as follows:
"Hey what's your name. If you are reading this note it means you limped your way into my office. I say limped because I'm not buying the tripping over your dog. Fake. Anyway, we all know I'm the greatest president and won by a landslide. Rudy had all the voter fraud evidence on his motorola razor phone but lost it when he switched carriers. Everyone knows this happens all the time. Big tech, caused the biggest voter fraud ever. I'm telling you right now, B-I-G tech.
"I, and I alone, leave the country in the greatest shape ever - strong, united, healthy, and the greatest economy ever. Even you can manage to keep it going. All the so-called problems of the country, fake, are the fault of Hillary and Nancy. My advice is to ignore those nasty women.
Speaking of advice, I know you are going to need my help; after all, I am the greatest advisor. You can reach me by Twitter, oops, Facebook, er no, Instagram, oh sorry, YouTube, nope, well for now call 800-Two-Terms.
president don j trump, 2016 - 2024