Fluoridated Water is an Isis Plot
Washington, D. C. A study released today charges that fluoridating the water supply throughout Western Civilization is a plot by Isis to "rot out the brains of freedom-loving people, making them susceptible to radical Islamic propaganda." Research...Read full story
Man Got Out Of Bed On The Wrong Side
"Early to bed, early to rise" goes the old maxim, but it was this 'early rise' and the darkness in which it was enacted, that proved the undoing of one man in his southeast Asian bedroom hellhole last week. Moys Kenwood, 56, had to be up especiall...Read full story
Jeffrey Epstein To Be Charged With His Own Murder
Things just keep on getting worse and worse for disgraced former financier, Jeffrey Epstein, who, after he had been arrested and held for sexual offences against children, then wound up dead, and, this morning, was charged with his own murder by stra...Read full story
Millennial Worries that Being Dead Might Be Even More Boring than Being Alive
Curt Framingham, a 26-year-old software designer living in Atlanta, Georgia, isn't particularly impressed with what life's had to offer him thus far but is concerned that being dead might be even more boring. "Honestly, I'd say consciousness is ov...Read full story
In a display of righteous indignation, Trump slaps sanctions on Greenland for obstructing purchase of Denmark.
“I’ll get what I want to make America great again” said POTUS. “I have the right weapon,” he added, “to use against persons or countries who stand in my way-- Lethal Sanctions! Designed to bring whole nations to their knees. Look at what I have done...Read full story
President Trump loses total body control
After admitting that he accidentally watched Real Time with Bill Maher sources close to the president have confirmed that Trump has lost control not only of his eyes and ears, but most of the rest of his body as well. Most of the president's recent...Read full story
Hannibal Lector Scores New Epstein Lampshade: Where’s The Meat?
BILLINGSGATE POST: A newly-released video showing forensic psychiatrist and taxidermist, Dr. Hannibal Lecter, carrying a lampshade out of the Metropolitan Correctional Center in New York City, was released this morning as part of the probe into the...Read full story
Boris disappointed EU rejected his scribbled Brexit plan
UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson has returned crestfallen from his European trip, after the leaders of France and Germany rejected his proposed Brexit deal. TheSpoof caught an exclusive glimpse of the piece of paper on which Boris had written the d...Read full story
"Fish Zapping" Assisted by CIA Covert Operations
GRAND RIVERS, KENTUCKY - Television has chronicled the challenge of fishing for Bluefin Tuna in the North Atlantic. Outdoor sportsmen skillfully use Fly-Fishing to catch Rainbow Trout in mountain streams. However, this level of entertainment is not s...Read full story
Trump Buys Greenland, Immediately Orders Americans to "Burn Coal Like Hell and Thaw that Sucker Out"
Washington - President Donald Trump, successful in his bid to buy Greenland from Denmark last month, ordered all American industrial plants, utility plants and consumers to burn coal and any other high carbon dioxide emitting fuels nonstop to hurry u...Read full story
Trump Offers to End All Danish Social Programs and "Make Denmark Great Again” if it Hands Over Greenland
Copenhagen, Denmark - President Donald Trump doubled down on his offer to buy Greenland from Denmark, promising to send his team to the diminutive European country and raze the "destructive and pervasive socialism running rampant there". In return,...Read full story
Trump contemplates hostile takeover of Greenland
Despite the insistence of Greenland’s government that the semi-autonomous Danish territory is not for sale, President Donald Trump is pushing ahead with efforts to purchase Greenland with or without its approval. Describing the acquisition as “ess...Read full story